The bed was piled with naked parts: bottoms, breasts, a leg, a gut. Frank sat at the foot of the bed, staring at skin, thinking about flesh, the ugliness of it. Without love or lust, the human body was as appealing as a mound of raw pizza dough.
“Does it have to have been bad sex?” said Allegra. “Can’t they have had good sex?”
Allegra and Dwight were sprawled on the bed, Dwight on his back, Allegra facedown across Dwight’s middle. Her pouty butt was in the air, her T-shirt yoked around her neck. Their jeans and underwear were tangled around their ankles.
Chris, Melissa, and Toby stood by the wall, approximating an audience. Boaz was out in the living room, rigging up the stereo. He refused to watch Allegra do this scene.
Tonight was their last chance to get things right. Tomorrow was opening night, but they hadn’t done a tech yet, much less a dress. They were still working out the undressed portion of the program. Nothing was going right.
“Frank?” said Allegra. “Frank? Hello out there? We’re waiting.”
“If we’re like this for much longer,” said Dwight, “Allegra’s gonna turn me straight.”
“Not before you turn me homo,” said Allegra.
Dwight began to laugh, as if that were the most wonderful joke in the world. Frank didn’t get it.
“No,” Frank finally said. “You just look silly.”
“Gee, thanks,” said Allegra. She rolled off Dwight and wiggled her jeans and panties up. Dwight was even quicker about covering up, turning around so nobody would see his privates.
“Allegra has a point,” said Chris. “Why does it have to be bad sex? Why do they have to look ridiculous?”
“Because it’s a comedy,” said Frank. “And they don’t love each other.”
“You can have great sex with someone you don’t love,” said Chris. “You don’t even have to like them. Which I think is funny.”
Dwight told Frank, “Just because your love life is in a dark place doesn’t mean we should suffer.” He thought he was only making a joke.
“Fine. What do you guys suggest? How do you want to represent great sex?”
“Let’s go back to the original idea,” said Allegra. “We’re naked and we’re under a sheet. And it’s after sex and we’re blissed out.”
“And smoking cigarettes?” said Toby. “That is so tired.”
She ignored him. “We’re breathless, we’re catching our breaths, we can’t believe it was so great. And then we see who we’re with, and we slowly become ourselves again.”
“Since we’re under the sheet,” said Dwight, “can I keep my underwear on?”
Melissa groaned. “I hate plays and movies where people fuck like crazy, then get up and are still wearing underpants.”
Frank thought about it. “Take everything off,” he said. “Both of you. And scatter it around the bed. Then, as you do the scene, you’re not sure whose clothes are whose. You pass things back and forth. Starting with your underwear. Now that’s funny.” And pathetic. He was determined to include some pathos here.
“I like that,” said Allegra. She turned to Dwight. “We can have fun with that, don’t you think?”
Frank led the others back down the hall where the audience would be. Nobody was very interested in seeing Allegra and Dwight naked again; they were only “acting” the role of an audience here.
“I wish I was doing Dwight’s part,” said Toby. “I could make naked funny.”
“Toby,” said Frank. “Just focus on your scenes, okay?”
Another day, another set of problems addressed and solved, maybe. Toby forgot half of what they’d worked out two days ago. Dwight was dropping lines. Chris and Allegra were resisting Frank just to be difficult. Tomorrow was opening night and nothing was working, but even if it did work, what would they have? Dog meat. Frank had spent four weeks of his life trying to turn a piece of unwatchable dog meat into watchable dog meat. He could not wait for this show to be over. He could be free again, but free to do what? Jessie was over. Jessie was dead. There was no chance of Jessie anymore. There was nothing but his stupid job and this stupid show.
“We’re ready!” Allegra called out.
“All right,” said Frank, and he led the others down the hall, grumbling, “Let’s see what they have for us this time.”