CHAPTER 10

 

 

As wolves we ran, and as wolves we slipped underground.

We are hunters.

We hunt.

We slid up from the sewers, and we stood upon the brink of our destination, where the sewers opened to the empty building of the street, at the edge of our destination.

Aggie knew the way in and out, and so did Jona following Salvatore and Aggie, and so, therefore, did we.

We slipped inside in the dark. We climb in silence past the rectory kitchen, up the stairs and into the darkness.

Wolves slipped into the rooms, sniffing through them all for the woman who is old enough to be in charge.

We peeled back the wolfskin. We looked at her sleeping. She snored gently. She was a thin woman with blue veins like rivers in her wet parchment map of skin. She looked up at us, and pulled the ragged sheets around her body, pulling back.

She reminded me of another woman.

“We are the Walkers of Erin,” I said. “We have been hunting the demon stain.”

“What are you doing here? This is not the proper channels!”

“The proper channels are too corrupted,” I said. “Do you remember Aggie?”

“Of course I do! It was one of the worst things that’s ever happened in my life, signing off on her! Where were you? Where was your huntress in the night?”

I placed the papers at the foot of her bed.

“We need your help,” I said. I bowed gracefully. “The children of Erin beseech your aid, madame Imamite, against our common enemy.”

“And… who is our enemy?”

“Elishta,” I said.

“Naturally, but who else? Who has brought you crawling here for my help saying proper channels are corrupted?”

“We need to see the king,” I said.

She picked up the papers and shook them. She flipped through them. “Do I even want to know the details?”

I shrugged. “Copies have been made. We want you to make copies, too. Everyone must know the truth. Spread them to every convent, every prayer hall and sanctuary. Tell anyone that listens. This is why we came to you, to be sure you receive the truth directly. Read it from every street corner. Send it to every library, every scholar, every speaker.”

She pushed the paper back to me. “Stay for breakfast. Stay here. No one will know if you remain among the Anchorites a day. There is no contact with the outside world in here. We receive shipments in silence and veiled from one gate. We do not let our girls wander the streets wagging tongues.”

I shook my head. “Aggie was not supposed to leave your gates, either.”

“She was a demon child. Who knows what evil magic she used to escape us.”

“You should read those,” said my husband. “Send your people to us when you’re ready to aid us. We need an audience with the king.”

She put them on the ground. “I should have you arrested. It is illegal for a man to invade our convent. We are allies in this world but not the next.”

“Elishta is our enemy in both,” said my husband. “Our faiths are practical enough when it comes to that.” He pulled the wolf skin back over his back, and stretched, menacingly flashing fangs. He was ready to leave. So was I.

The Anchorite nodded. She took a deep breath. She picked up the pages. “Go, then. I will make my own decisions about what you have brought to me.”

We bowed.

Our next destination was a nobleman whose son was murdered and thrown into the water. We were going to offer him the whole kingdom. All he had to do was be ready to act when the time came to stop Sabachthani.

He would help us. Of course he would help us. He was weeping about his son when we handed him the truth. We told him what happened, and what vengeance he could take. We told him that we had chosen his noble line to support when the king died, and our support came with knowledge of his enemies.

Imam’s priests would fall in line with us, and with him.

Everyone will know. Everything hidden comes to the light. This is the revolution: No one can pretend they do not know. The Sabachthani hold on this city will crumble at the word of truth. There are faithful in this city who would fight back. There are men and women who would relish the chance to pull the Sabachthani down.

We spread these words to every street corner, every one in the city. We got the idea from Calipari and the crowns. He did it to put out the fire. We did it to start one.

 

***

 

Jona leaned against the door. “You’ve been gone,” he said.

She pushed him hard. He didn’t expect that at all. He fell back, stumbled a little, and collapsed onto a small table against the foyer wall.

Rachel was smothered in black mud. Only her green eyes gleamed through to reveal her face. Rachel raised balls of ice in her hand like she was going to throw them. Fire popped in the air like exploding fireflies.

Jona smirked. “Rachel, I’ve been worried,” said Jona. “What in bloody Elishta are you doing?”

Rachel stopped. Her throat clenched with crying. The ice dropped. “I wanted to rob you.”

Jona snatched her wrists from the air. He pulled the filthy things to his lips. He kissed first the left wrist, then the right. He wiped his dirty lips off on his sleeve.

“I’m trying to rob you, Jona,” she said. She kicked at his shins.

He grabbed her by the waist and pulled her in close. “You could just ask for help,” he said.

“Please, Jona!” said Rachel. She was crying now. “I don’t want this!”

“Calmly, Rachel,” he said. He wrapped his arms around her. She collapsed into him. He held her up, and the mud everywhere was a gritty, hard thing to hold, worse than jagged scales.

She pushed him off. “Jona, please.”

She looked away from him. He pressed his lips into the mud across her cheek. “I won’t let him go. I won’t.”

“Djoss?” Jona tried to go for the other side.

She let him kiss her there, too, and kept looking away from him.

She was disgusted and impatient. “He’s my whole life. I won’t let him go, Jona.”

Jona leaned back. He tried to get eye contact. “Your brother fell into the pinks,” he said, “I told you about that.” He let his forehead fall into hers. She had no choice. She had to look into his eyes. “Come on, you can take a bath and get some food. My mother went to work already. She won’t be back until sunset.”

“Are you on duty today?”

“No. I’m off today. It’s Adventday soon. It’s off day today so I can work Adventday. I should be at temple, if I went to such things.”

“Jona…”

He pressed his lips into her. “I missed you,” he whispered, “Why’d you leave me? Where will you go? Why leave?”

Rachel pushed him off. She leaned against the door.

“Jona, I have nowhere else to go right now, and I don’t know what to do, so will you stop talking about it, please? I don’t want to talk about this.”

“I missed you. Your brother is full of something terrible.”

“I won’t give up on him. Why are you trying to force me to do something I can’t, Jona?”

“You did it to me, first,” he said.

They stood still there, in the entryway. They couldn’t look each other in the face. Jona’s eyes wandered from the muddy clothes, to his hand, to her boots. “You’re filthy,” he said, “Go take a bath.” He placed a hand on her muddy cheek. He looked up into her eyes. He kissed her gently. They looked in each other’s eyes. “Tell me where Djoss is, and I’ll go get him.”

Rachel’s face broke. Her lip trembled. Her eyes shut. She fell into Jona. He saw it coming in time to catch. He ran his hands over her hair. She lost three wracking sobs. Then, she swallowed her tears, and she stepped back, acid steaming off the mud at the corners of her eyes. She took a deep breath. She looked up with her face back. “Thank you, Jona,” she said. She took another deep breath. “Thank you.”

 

***

 

Djoss was awake when Jona arrived. Djoss squatted half-naked in the mud, tied up with his own shirt. He didn’t move. He didn’t look Jona in the face.

Djoss looked at Jona’s uniform. He nodded.

“You look like a tosser with lady troubles.”

Djoss shrugged. “I got no trouble with you, king’s man.”

“Me? I got trouble with you. I got lady troubles deep.” Jona laughed at Djoss’ hard eyes. “Your sister sent me.”

“What?” he said, “When I woke up alone…”

“She did and she didn’t. She left to get help.”

“Oh,” said Djoss. Djoss processed this statement in his head like a mathematical equation and deduced no solution. He squinted. He looked up at Jona. “I remember you.”

Jona scratched at his scalp. “Like I said, I got lady troubles.”

Djoss stood up slow. He walked slow, too. His eyes never left the ground at his feet. Jona walked beside him. In his mind, he was trying to figure how gone the pinker was.

Djoss’ hands began to shake. Jona wondered if the trembling hand was frustration, rage, or pinks. He decided it was pinks, because frustration and rage would only make Djoss want more false bliss.

At the house, Jona led Djoss in through the kitchen. There wasn’t anything worth stealing in the kitchen but old clay dishes. Jona handed Djoss some cheese and bread. Djoss ate as slowly as he had walked. He didn’t look up from the table.

Jona leaned against the cupboard. Jona watched Djoss nibbling. Djoss looked back, shifting in his seat.

“Where’s Rachel?” said Djoss.

“She’s upstairs, I think. I can hear someone moving about up there, taking a bath. You’ll be having one of those soon, too, so my mother won’t know you’re here. Mess like that everywhere, there’s no hiding a thing.”

Jona watched the stranger in his kitchen eating. Around the edges of the eyes, Jona saw the man beneath the shame: strong, proud, and dumb.

Djoss stared at his hands.

 

***

 

Rachel plucked out the darkest dress with the longest hem and the highest collar and tried to figure how to sew what was left of her Senta leathers over it to get a red X across the chest. She poured the bathwater down a drain in the floor, and she pumped for more water from the wall. Then, she scrubbed at the basin.

The Joni house was huge and larger in its sparse furnishing, full of bright white paint and dark woods. Her bare feet echoed in the upstairs hall. Her scales clicked quietly in the air. She walked naked, poking her head into the different rooms she found. Most of them were just naked walls, where furniture had been sold off and not even drapes covered the windows. When Rachel found Jona’s mother’s room, she dug through the drawers to find something that covered her scales and boots. She dressed. She wandered through the house again, searching for signs of life. She found her way to the kitchen.

Djoss looked up at her, in her ill-fitting new clothes too thin in the hips and too loose in the stomach.

Jona placed more cheese on the table.

Djoss stood up.

“Hello, Djoss,” she said. She sat down at the table and tried to act natural. She didn’t feel natural. She was clean and he was dirty. She was in Jona’s kitchen with nowhere else to go. And Jona watched them both, a scowl locked in his eyes.

“Djoss,” said Rachel, “you could use a bath.”

“I could,” he said, “have you eaten?”

“I have,” she said.

This was all that was said. Djoss ate more cheese and none of three people said a word. At first, Rachel felt like standing up and moving and walking around a little, but she didn’t want to be the first to move.

Jona pierced the veil of still. “What’s your plan?”

Rachel looked up. “We’ll leave together.” She pointed at her brother, then herself. “Him and me.”

Djoss nodded.

“How?” asked Jona.

“I don’t know,” answered Rachel.

Jona placed a hand on his chin, thinking deeply. “Right,” said Jona, “that is certainly a thing to think on. I figure you got no money or you wouldn’t come to me.” He scratched his head. He shook his head. He stood up, “Come with me, Djoss. I’ll get you in a bath and get you some clean clothes while we all think about this.”

Djoss followed Jona up the stairs and down the hall. He was careful not to tramp too much mud in his wake. He couldn’t help it. He didn’t have Rachel’s fires to burn it away on his boots.

Djoss said, well out of Rachel’s hearing, “What’s to think about?” said Djoss, “We have to steal it. Enough money, I mean.” He looked at his hands. “She can’t do it. Not with her blood like it is. I do what I have to for her, to keep her good. Only I can do it. I have to steal the money, somehow.”

“Never occurs to anyone to get a job, does it?” said Jona, “You know I’m a king’s man. I can arrest you just for saying it.”

“Arrest me, then,” said Djoss, “Set her free of me. I know you’re a child of a demon, like her. She told me.”

Jona took a deep breath. Instead, he led Djoss to the bathtub and gave him some of Jona’s old clothes. “Don’t rob anybody without warning me first,” he said, “And I will be counting the silver ’fore you leave. You got any teeth?”

“Me?” said Djoss, “No. Rachel ran off with my cutlery. We sold it all.”

“Right,” said Jona, darkly. “Tell me that again. Show me those teeth, like a rowdy dog.”

Djoss pulled a long dagger from his boot and tossed it at Jona’s feet.

Jona nodded. “I’ll give it to you when you leave. I’m no thief, and this is for your own good.”

Jona took everything sharp from the room. Djoss watched from the middle of the floor. The shaving razors and the toothpicks and the glass all got piled outside the door. Djoss watched the pile grow. He blushed, but he said nothing.

When the door closed, and the tub was pumped full of cold water, Djoss ducked underneath the surface and held his breath as long as he could. When he couldn’t breathe anymore he tried to stay down, beneath the surface. His lungs blossomed with burning. His heartbeat quickened.

He came up for air, and Jona was there. The door was open behind him.

“Trying to drown, huh?” he said.

“No,” said Djoss, “Just trying to get clean. You must have really been rich to get a fountain in all the rooms.”

“My dad lost it all in the war, with his neck. We’re lucky just to have the house,” said Jona. “There’s only a couple rooms where the pumps still work, anyhow. Rachel loves you and I don’t. I think you’re too far gone for anybody. Want me to just give you a few coins and leave you in a hookah den for a while? I would do that, if it was best for Rachel. Is that what’s best for Rachel?”

Djoss said nothing.

“What’s best for Rachel?” said Jona. “Me? I don’t care if you walk away and fade away into whatever burns you up.”

Djoss spoke softly. “She wants to stay with me not you,” he said. “I want to do better for her. I can stop if we get out of town, get away from the stuff for good.”

Jona squinted. “Is that what’s best for her?”

Djoss shrugged. “Only the Gods know, and they’d probably argue about it.”

“Right,” said Jona. “Erin, Imam, Senta koans like Rachel’s spells, and the Nameless dancing in the dark with demons. Not a one has anything to do with you or me or Rachel. We’re just doing our best. Sucking on a hookah is a dead man’s game, Djoss. Once you start, you’re a dead man walking bleeding out slowly. The water in the tub is stained pink from you bleeding out.”

Djoss creased his eyebrows. Then, after a deep breath, “Thank you for your hospitality,” he said. “May I please bathe in peace?”

“Yeah, I guess,” said Jona. “You’re a giant to her. The way she describes you it’s some kind of giant. Look at you, now.”

Jona shook his head and stepped out into the hall. He waited, and wondered if he shouldn’t just throw a bunch of money at him and kick him out into the street. He wondered if Rachel would stay if he did that.

He just wanted Rachel to stay.

 

***

 

When Djoss got out of the bath and dressed in his same, dirty clothes, Jona led Djoss downstairs, to the basement. Between the empty buckets and empty boxes and ruined remains of all the things that weren’t worth selling, two stone columns rose up from the floor. Chains with heavy iron clasps lay rusty on the floor. They seemed to be more rust than metal now, sitting in the mud.

“These used to be my da’s before he died,” said Jona. “You know how it is with some of us. It touches us all a little different. Night terrors. I don’t think Rachel has them. I’m lucky I don’t have to sleep, so I don’t really know what it’s like. We had to chain my da down, though. He’d sleepwalk sometimes.”

On the other side of the stone columns, ancient armor, a shield and a nobleman’s mace rested against clay bricks. With all the sweat and blood in the metal from Jona’s father, it could not be sold off safely.

Jona clapped his hands, and rubbed them together industriously. “You know what we gotta do,” he said.

Djoss frowned. “Does Rachel know?”

Jona placed his heavy hand upon Djoss’ back. It was like palming a boulder there was still so much knotted muscle there. “She doesn’t know like I do. You’d gnaw your hands off to get one little puff when the urge comes. I have to chain you by the throat like a dog.”

“I won’t gnaw my hands off.”

“You would,” said Jona. “And you know you would when the hunger strikes real bad in a day or so.”

Jona pushed Djoss forward. Djoss frowned and turned back to throw a punch.

Jona grabbed the fist in the air and placed Djoss’ own blade at Djoss’ throat. “I’m trying to help you,” said Jona. “I don’t have to do this. If you’re here, you’re chained. You know the feeling you get when you can’t get enough of it.”

Djoss calmed. He stepped back to the wall. Jona’s knife stayed on Djoss’ throat. “Pick up the chains and latch your neck. I’ve got the padlocks in my pocket.”

Djoss leaned away from the dagger. He picked up the old chains from the mud floor. Each side had half the chain.

“When Da used this damn thing, he’d wear chains on his arms, too. We buried him in those chains. We didn’t know what his body would do. Wizards steal the bones of demons. I’ve seen things built with bones. Horrible stuff. You have no idea what it’s like to be a monster in your own home, to be used like one. You don’t know anything about us.”

Jona attached a padlock to each side of the latch. It fit around Djoss’ neck with an inch to spare. Jona’s father was a large man, before he died.

“What will you do tonight?” said Djoss.

“I don’t sleep,” Jona said, “I never sleep. I was born with wings, but my Ma cut them off of me before anyone could see them. Tonight, I’ll be finding you a way out of this town, like Rachel wants. If you’re smarter than I think you are, you’ll leave her free and easy and never look back.”

 

***

 

Jona left Djoss there, tied up like a monster with the heavy chain around his neck. Djoss watched the light fade in the closing door. He sat down in the mud and the darkness. He reached with his hands against the walls. He felt only darkness. He pressed against the chains around his neck. He reached into the night. He felt nothing. He reached harder and harder until the chains choked him. He sat down, on the ground. He reached through the darkness for the bolts on the stone. He found them. He clutched the bolts with both hands. He listened in the darkness for any sound at all. The house was too large. He couldn’t hear anything. They probably couldn’t hear him on these old chains.

These chains were strong enough for most pinkers, but they weren’t strong enough for Djoss. Jona wasn’t the first king’s man surprised by this old, hard strength.

Upstairs, Jona and Rachel sat in the kitchen. Rachel was cooking something. She didn’t really know how to cook what was in this kitchen, but at least if she was moving pots and fire she wasn’t forced to really talk to Jona about the important things. Instead, she could ask him where something was. She could describe it with her hands. “It’s a pot with a shape like this on the bottom, about this wide?”

“It’s in the third cupboard.”

“It’s flat and has a crank on it to smash the wheat flat,” she said, holding her palm down and her fingers straight, “Real flat.”

“It’s in the drawer next to the stove. Do you need matches?”

Rachel shrugged. She flicked her finger at the kindling, and little drops of fire like drops of water splashed over the bark and coal. The stove sputtered a moment, and then it crackled.

“When does your mother come home?”

“Soon,” he said, “She’ll hate that you cooked.”

“What will you tell her about me?”

“The truth. She’ll understand. You couldn’t turn to a temple for help, could you? Just because our blood is wicked, we don’t necessarily have to be. She knows that.”

“Still,” she said, “what about Djoss?”

“He’s sleeping,” said Jona

Rachel sighed. “Why is he asleep?” she asked.

“I don’t know,” said Jona, “He got out of the bath and fell asleep in a spare room. I say let him sleep. We’re going to have a long night. I’ll take him to some friends of mine. I’ll stay with him and make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid. He saves up enough, with you two sleeping here, and then you hire passage on a ship and sail off into the sun. My mother might have something for you around the house, but we won’t be able to pay you ourselves. If that’s what you want, anyway. If you want to try something else, I’m up for it.”

“No,” she said. She waved her hands over what she was cooking, “That’s fine, Jona. Thank you.” She opened a drawer, and rummaged through them. “I had a knife. I know I had a knife. It was the only one I had.”

“It’s out,” said Jona. He pointed right in front of her.

“Oh.”

 

***

 

Djoss had broken the chains. Of course he broke the chains. They were old and rusty and he was still not so far gone that he had lost all his strength.

Jona imagined, from what he had found afterwards, that Djoss found the stairs. He climbed carefully. The basement door wasn’t locked. He slipped into the lower hallway. This part of the house was full of servant’s rooms. They were all empty, and caked in dust. Old trinkets that no one would buy gathered dust on the shelves. A dusty teddy bear. A broken clock. Lost books. Things that weren’t worth selling. They sat on the floor like dead prisoners.

Djoss opened doors down the hall until he found the stairs. He climbed up to the next floor. This was the main hall. He knew where he was now, and he knew he couldn’t get out the door without passing too close to Jona and Rachel whom he heard still in the kitchen. He went up another floor, and then another. He climbed all five flights to the roof. He climbed out. The afternoon sun was high and hot. Flecks of humidity licked his skin. On the roof, the house laundry dried in rows of sunlight like limp, wet rags. No wind blew them.

Djoss looked down at his filthy clothes. He stripped off his shirt, and pulled one of Jona’s uniforms from the line. It was a tight fit, and the seams screamed, but the uniform held together enough.

Djoss didn’t know where to go from here. He sat in a corner of the roof, behind the doorway. He frowned.

 

***

 

“Do you think he’s hungry?” she said, stirring.

“Him?” said Jona. He reached around Rachel to pull out two bowls. “I think he’s snoring like a baby.”

Rachel turned. She looked up at Jona, his arms spread around her with the bowls. “Did you tie him down?”

“The door’s locked and there’s no window,” said Jona, “He’s going nowhere.”

She leaned into him. “I hate that we do that. I hate it. He’s been good for days. Let me untie him.”

“We can’t leave him alone if he isn’t tied up.”

“Then I’ll sit with him. I want to be with him right now. Where is he?”

“Let him sleep.”

“Why are you being like this?”

“Just sit down,” said Jona. He wrapped his arms around her, with the bowls in his hands, “Eat.”

“He’s my brother, Jona,” she said, “Don’t you understand that?”

“No,” he said. “I wish I did. Bloody Elishta, I wish I understood this. I don’t know what you think will happen next. We’ll try your way, and get you out of town, okay?”

 

***

 

Djoss snatched at the ropes from the laundry. He didn’t bother pulling the laundry loose. He untied them all from the stones. He left them lashed in on the side near an alley. He looked over the edge. He looked at his ropes. He figured it was still going to be a good drop to the ground. He tugged off all the laundry. He put them in a big pile near the edge, where he planned to jump. He dropped them in one big lump over the edge. He grabbed the rope. He spun it around in his hand, so the many threads wrapped all over each other and then around his waist.

He took a running start. He jumped. The ropes caught at the second story. He slammed into the wall. The wind rushed out of his lungs like his body was on fire. He crumpled to the ground, into the pile of laundry.

I’m sure he knew that Rachel would come looking for him. When that happened, he wanted to have it all back—all the money he had spent, and all the futures he had lost. He swore to himself he wouldn’t touch the weed again. He was going to be strong, like he had always been. This was his chance to earn it all back.

 

***

 

Jona had turned around for a moment. He was scrubbing a dish clean. He pumped the water out from the line to the canal. He scraped the steel pots clean of rice with a pumice stone. He talked to her, she was sitting behind him at the table, and she wasn’t saying a word. “My mother never told me what to do if I ever met anyone like me,” he said. “She never really believed I would meet anyone like me. I think she thought I was the only one in the world. Whenever I asked her what to do if I found another like me, she just said nothing to it. She’d just act like she didn’t hear me ask her that, or something. I don’t know what it means. I don’t know what to make of any of this. We make people sick, but they don’t make us sick. They don’t make demons sick, either, I think. If they do, how would we know? Where are we supposed to go to find out how we are the way we are? Maybe Lord Sabachthani knows about us, but if we tell him it’s our death, right? Maybe we stick together and we find more people like us. We find out what they know. Maybe we can make our own way underground and see Elishta’s Nameless for ourselves, or we find people who know about it and find out what they know. Maybe someday we get enough people like us, we split off and make our own place, our own district, our own city. Bloody Elishta, a whole city. Maybe someday we can be together, you and me, and have a family, and nobody cares if the kid has wings or scales or big, sharp teeth like a lizard, because it’s still just a kid, right?” He stopped scrubbing with his stone. He pumped some fresh water into the pot. He rested his arms on the side of the sink. “Rachel, I wish we could be a family…” he turned around to look her in the face.

She was gone.

A candle burned on the table. The flame flickered in slight winds from invisible places in the stale room. The clay white wax curved gracefully over the puckered, melting lips.

 

***

 

I do not know her path through the Joni house. I do not know whether she found the basement where her brother had broken through the old chains. I do not know if she found the roof where the laundry lines fluttered down the side of the building like banners.

Ragpickers had snatched the cloth on the lines close to ground. Industrious boys piled crates along the side of the house and climbed up the ropes, jamming feet between bricks, and pulling at the bits of uniform and bedsheets and women’s working dresses. Jona’s appearance scared them all overboard, like sailors jumping ship.

Jona looked over the edge of the roof. He pulled the laundry lines back to the roof, shaking off the boys that clung too long to the lines.

He threw the clothes on the roof, and went back inside. He sat alone in a dark room until his mother came home.

He thought and thought, and nothing made sense, and none of it was going to make sense, but he kept thinking. Pretty soon, he stopped thinking and just felt that feeling that comes to young men, when nothing turned out like they planned, and she’s gone.

There is a wailing that came next, a gnashing of teeth, and waiting for daylight on the roof of the house, where the stars and the moon occasionally showed themselves past the clouds and lamplight.