These will probably be the most uncomfortable sandals you’ve ever worn, but there must be something attractive about them because they are sold in abundance in Japan, where they are called geta. All you need are a bunch of hockey sticks and some fabric or soft rope to make the foot straps. If you are into big-time suffering, use scratchy hemp cord.
Determine the size before you start; the sandal should be an inch longer than the designated foot and about 5" across (5 sticks, wide side up). Any wood joined in butcher-block fashion goes together better if you run it through a joiner before glueing. Use a good wood glue and secure the soles with clamps until the glue hardens. Each sandal requires two uprights, an inch or two tall, glued and screwed onto the bottoms. Walking in these sandals requires a rocking gait, so these pieces should not be placed too close to the centre. Use a 3/8" bit to drill the thong attachment holes. Get the intended feet on the bases and mark the hole placement: one between the big toe and second toe and two back by the arch. Make a Y out of your fabric or soft rope and insert the ends into the holes in the platform, knotting them underneath to hold them in place.
If you have a streak of mischief in you, there is an alternative use for these sandals that will win your neighbours’ attention and your kids’ undying gratitude. Bigfoot Sandals start with oversized sandals without the uprights. Sculpt the bottoms of a huge pair of feet out of clay, paying anatomical attention to gnarled toes and cracked soles. Press an old piece of leather into the clay, then gently remove it, leaving a realistic semblance of distressed skin.
Now, make a plaster of Paris mold. Find a box slightly larger than the feet and put them sole-side up in the bottom. Brush them with liquid dishwashing soap to prevent the clay from binding with the plaster. Mix up the plaster and pour it over the clay feet. Shake the mold gently to reduce bubbles in the plaster. Let it harden. While it is setting, clean up. Don’t be a duffus and pour left-over plaster down the drain. I did this as a kid, and my dad’s exclamations still echo in the stratosphere.
After a couple of hours, the plaster should be set. Take the box apart, pull the clay from the plaster, and clean the remaining bits out of the cracks. These concave feet are your molds. Brush them with liquid soap and fill them with silicone caulk. Use a putty knife to get the silicone as flat as possible. Silicone may take 24 hours to set, and it is quite stinky. Sorry, you can’t rush this part. Trim around each silicone foot for a realistic look and use contact cement to stick the feet to the bottoms of your oversized sandals. Attach nylon webbing so you can strap the Bigfoot Sandals to your boots. Fresh snow, not too deep, will make the best impression.
