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I might be half vampire, but I liked to think I inherited very little from Cash, besides immortality. And now suddenly the ability to read emotions. What the hell was that? Maybe I let more of Blade inside me than I bargained for.
I lay awake all night, cringing every time I heard Lennon moan. What was I going to do, interrupt whatever they were doing and urge her to run because he wanted to kill her? She was already under Cash’s spell. I didn’t know how to break it.
And I wasn’t sure I wanted to. When I thought of her sitting on that couch, trying to seduce my dad, it always led to the same thing. A replay of the vision of my mother batting me away. Telling me to go back to Hell.
Rejection, that’s what I saw.
Blade was right, I wanted people to like me. And he was also right that there were only a handful of people who were really worth it. I wanted to come first for those people. Like my mother.
Revenge, that’s what I wanted.
Lennon stuck around, completely enthralled by Cash. He wouldn’t talk about her with me, said it wasn’t any of my business. Like hell. So I took the high road and avoided her as long as I could. She was trying so hard to be my friend, but I refused to let her in. Every time I looked at her, I wanted to scream, shake her, and tell her to get the hell out of here. Not because Cash was using her, but because she personified everything I couldn’t have. A normal life. The complete adoration of my father. My mother.
“Holly, your performance is incredible.” Lennon caught me off guard one afternoon in the kitchen. We both kept vampire hours. Now I had to talk to her. I glared at her as she picked up my tea kettle, helping herself to a scoop of my lavender tea. I’d run out of lettuce tea, and this was all the hotel could bring me on short notice. “I can’t take my eyes off you when you perform. The way you move is gorgeous.”
My hands rattled around my cup as I steeped the leaves. I felt bad, resenting her so much. For a couple seconds. “Thanks.”
“It’s the highlight of the show.” Lennon was either oblivious to or ignoring my discomfort with her existence. “The whole theater is completely mesmerized when you’re on stage. No one else can do what you do.”
“They’re there for Cash.” Like she was. I tried to pull away, to put an end to this conversation. She stole my oxygen. It was like payback for what I did to my mother.
“That might be true.” She followed me to the couch. “But they fall in love with you.”
She knew just what I needed to hear. I took a deep breath. I wasn’t going to let this girl seduce me, too. I tucked my feet under me, like Rainey would have, and sipped my tea. “Doesn’t it bother you that Cash is a vampire?”
“Not at all. It doesn’t matter what he is, it’s who he is that I’ve fallen for.” Lennon’s lipstick tattooed her mug. She was already fully made up, her hair in an elaborate updo. Maybe she wasn’t human after all. She looked like a china doll. “You don’t remember me, do you, Holly?”
“No. I don’t.” My mouth went dry. My memory was terrible. Many times, I didn’t know the difference between time travel and what I experienced once it happened. Lucille had made me doubt myself my whole life. Without Rainey, I couldn’t trust anyone to tell me the truth.
If Lennon said that we’d met at Bethlem, I’d run from here screaming.
I tipped my chin up, keeping my cool. “Where did we meet?” I braced myself for the answer.
“Across the street, at The Rivera.” Lennon waited for my reaction. It never occurred to me it could be worse than Bethlem. “My boyfriend was Jacey, from Fire Dancer.”
My skin flushed like it did any time that show was mentioned. She looked down to her lap. She must have known why I left the show before it even started. Jacey would have told her what happened.
“I liked him.” Jacey made a terrible vampire. He wasn’t into the drama, he wanted to make music. And I remembered Lennon now; it had been a couple years since I’d seen her, and she changed her look since then. When I met her, she looked like any other girl in the rock scene, tight clothes and a hard edge. She didn’t stand out like she did now. “I take it you’re not together anymore.”
“He’s dead.” She pressed her lips together, false eyelashes casting a shadow on her cheekbones. I sucked in a breath with her words. Vampires didn’t die. They were destroyed. Her glassy eyes met mine. “Blade killed him.”
Hot tea flooded my lap and I folded my hands over the puddle seeping into my pants. “Why would he do that?”
I knew the general answer, but Jacey? It didn’t make any sense. He never caused any waves. He played by the rules, and been respectful.
“I have no idea.” Lennon’s voice cracked. She rushed to the kitchen to get a towel for me, pressing it into my lap when she returned. “I was hoping you might be able to find out some answers. I know you guys have been spending a lot of time together.”
“Blade’s never mentioned Jacey.” Blade knew I had bad history with Noah. He hadn’t kept his rage or his bloodlust a secret. “Fire Dancer is a touchy subject for me.”
“I know, I hate even bringing it up. I wouldn’t have, if I wasn’t worried for your safety.” She nodded when my mouth dropped. “Has he told you about his ex-girlfriend?”
“Yeah.” The word had a bite to it. “He didn’t want to be a vampire. He blames her.”
Lennon sighed. “Being a vampire isn’t that bad. The no sunlight thing sucks, but he needs to get over it. Blade’s causing a lot of problems everywhere in the city. Even if Callie wasn’t my best friend, I’d still think he was acting like a complete asshole. He almost singlehandedly shut down Immortal Dilemma. Jacey isn’t the only person he killed. He ripped Callie’s roommate practically in half, and he wasn’t even sorry. He’s been doing everything he can to make life miserable for anyone in the clan that crosses him. You need to be careful.”
“We’ve talked about this.” My voice was barely more than a whisper. “I understand why he does it.”
I hoped she didn’t ask me to explain, because that something he shared in confidence. Even though this reveal was freaking me out, I wanted to protect him. To show him there was something stronger than hate.
“I don’t think he’s told you everything.” She held her hand up to stop me before I protested. “He’s working with Noah.”
Flames erupted in my lap. I jumped up from the couch, tamping down the fire before Cash had to buy new furniture. “What do you mean... working with Noah?”
I was going to pass out. I trusted Blade. I let our connection, the magnetism blind me to everything about him. No wonder I burst into flames when I touched him—he was a fucking traitor.
“Since he thinks he’s in control of Talis’ clan, he’s working with a new band that came into town. Soul Divider. Well, they’re not new, but they just came to Vegas. They used to be pretty famous, and Talis turned them into vampires to try to rekindle some of what they lost over the years. Anyway, they needed a singer, and Blade gave Noah the job.”
I sat back down on the couch, my head falling into my hands. Lennon put her hand on my back, and I froze.
“Don’t touch me,” I growled. I still couldn’t separate Lennon in the present from the memory of my mother telling me to go back to Hell.
“I’m sorry.” Lennon jumped back. “But you needed to know.”
I stayed quiet for a long time. Thankfully, Lennon didn’t try to touch me again. Her presence was comforting, when I let it be.
“He’s working with Cash,” I finally said. “Blade’s been helping bring the girls into the show. They die, you know. Cash is murdering them. He’s cast a spell over all the humans so they don’t realize what they’ve seen, or they don’t care. I’m not human, so it doesn’t work on me. You should know that, too. What you’re getting yourself involved in. You need to be careful.”
“I know,” Lennon said quietly, playing with one of the pins in her hair. “Don’t underestimate me because I’m human. I’ve been a part of this world for a long time. Sometimes I think I understand vampires better than vampires do.”
“I doubt that.” I almost told her about my mother, but that wasn’t my secret to share. That was on Cash. I didn’t know what he wanted with her. One thing had become painfully clear during this conversation—the only allegiance I had was to myself. “You see what they want you to.”
“Everyone lets their guard down at some point.” Lennon smiled sadly. “But fine, don’t listen to me. I know who’s working with who, and what they want. I have my eyes open, doll. I know what I’m doing.”