Fear makes the wolf bigger than he is.
German proverb
Phobias are the unfortunate result of fear: an exaggerated terror that robs the individual of a normal life. These extreme fears range from the common to the absurd, haunting millions by holding them in their irrational grip. You might say a phobia is fear on steroids.
This section of the book should help us understand the lengths to which Satan will go in order to destroy the quality of life God wants us to enjoy. Phobias are life-destroyers. But let us remember, even the strongest fear is no match for our God. The greatest and strongest fear must cower at the name of Jesus. And to the person being tormented by it, an intense phobia may seem like an overwhelming flood of emotions rushing against them that they cannot control. But there is an answer.
When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord will lift up a standard against him and put him to flight.
Isaiah 59:19
When individuals are being attacked with fear or phobias of any kind, they need not try to fight the battle on their own. They can put their faith in God and trust that He will give them victory. The enemy may come against us one way, but God’s Word says that he will flee before us seven ways (see Deuteronomy 28:7). No matter what your battles in life may be, I urge you not to ever try to fight them on your own. God will fight for you if you ask Him to.
Definitions of phobias are abundant. Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary says they are an exaggerated, usually inexplicable and illogical fear of a particular object, class of objects, or situation.
The Mayo Clinic defines phobias as an overwhelming and unreasonable fear of an object or a situation that poses little real danger.1
Unlike a brief anxiety most people feel when they give a speech or take a test, a phobia is long-lasting, causes intense physical and psychological reactions, and can affect your ability to function normally at work or in social settings.
Although definitions are plentiful, they vary somewhat. Most of them do say that the phobias and the behavior they cause are an abnormally fearful response to a danger that is imagined or irrationally exaggerated.
The list of phobias is never ending because it is ever expanding. There are phobias that people deal with today that were unheard of twenty-five years ago, or even just a few years ago. We must understand that Satan is very creative in his methods of torment. Once a new phobia is publicized, we then hear of more and more people being tormented by the same problem. Things that we never heard of are now widespread. For as many situations as you can imagine, there is a phobia for each one. There are hundreds of phobias listed online. The most recent online searches report that there are over 500.
1. People
(One quarter of the population reports excessive fears of at least one social situation, with public speaking fears topping the list.)
2. Animals
3. Heights
(More than 20 percent of adults report having had an irrational fear of heights.)
4. Agoraphobia
(Typically involves a fear of public places, open spaces, or traveling. When it’s severe, people can become housebound—literally trapped by fear.)
5. Claustrophobia
6. Flying
7. Blood/Injury/Infections
8. Water/Drowning
9. Storms (thunder and lightning)
10. Being in a crowd
1. Fear of vegetables
2. Fear of tight clothing
3. Fear of buttons
4. Fear of clowns
5. Fear of knees
7. Fear of flutes
8. Fear of losing mobile phone connectivity
9. Fear of a specific place
10. Fear of phobias
Here are a few others I have heard of from various sources: The fear of beautiful women, the fear of being touched, the fear of drafts or airborne diseases causing people to wear masks in public, the fear of seeing one’s own reflection in glass, fear of constipation, the moon, the sunlight, birds or other flying objects, the fear of sitting down, and of course there are fears of every animal one might imagine. The more of these lists I read, the more angry I become at Satan who is the source of all fear, and the more determined I am to see people find freedom.
I would like to say up front that I don’t claim to have the clinical or medical answers to problems such as these phobias present, but I do know some spiritual things that I believe will help. I am not a psychologist or a psychiatrist, but I do know God’s Word and have decades of experience in watching it set people free. Many times I have witnessed God’s Word and power setting people free from addictions and phobias who had gone through many years of counseling and various treatment programs to no avail. I will offer the help I believe I am qualified to give, and should you need other help, please seek it out. And above all, please do not give up, because God is able and willing to help you. Hope is one of the most powerful forces on Earth. As long as you have hope, the door is open for change.
Hope is one of the most powerful forces on Earth. As long as you have hope, the door is open for change.
When a seed is planted, it takes a while before it has long and strong roots. Should the seed be dug up and discarded before it has opportunity to take root, there would never be any fruit from it. There are good seeds and bad ones, things we would want to get rooted in our lives and things that we would not want to get rooted. When we experience a thought, an emotion, a behavior, or in this instance, a fear that we don’t want to become a permanent fixture, the best thing to do is resist it at its onset. Be aggressive in confronting it and firm in your decision not to give in to it. Always remember that the longer you let something linger, the longer it will take to get rid of it.
If someone makes me angry and I deal with my anger immediately, refusing to let it linger, I am normally able to move past it right away; however, if I hang on to it for a few days, then I find I have a bigger fight on my hands when I want to say good-bye to it.
This theory of resisting at the onset will only be helpful when new fears present themselves. I am sure many of you have ones that are already deeply rooted in your life, but new ones are always trying to gain an entrance. Beware and resist them at the onset. Even if you must resist them several times, do so. Don’t ever merely submit to fear without a fight. But when you fight fear, always remember to fight in God’s power and not your own.
Since phobias are defined as “unreasonable” fears, it may seem odd for me to suggest that we examine them with reason and logic, but I do believe this must be done as part of the freeing process. With God’s help, we can attempt to be reasonable about an unreasonable fear. For example: I once heard of a woman who had struggled with being overweight most of her life. She eventually had a child and was so fearful that the child would grow up and be overweight that she began exercising the baby’s little arms and legs daily while the baby was still in the crib. A bit of rational common sense would have shown her that exercising the infant’s limbs would not in any way affect the child’s weight later on in life.
Some disabling fears are the result of a traumatic event that took place sometime in a person’s life. The natural tendency is to fear that whatever happened will happen again, so we put up all of our defense mechanisms in order to never have to experience that thing again. Whatever happened caused pain, but fearing it will happen again keeps the pain fresh in our minds. Actually, statistically speaking, if something happens to a person once, like their house being robbed, then they are less likely to ever have it happen again. I know that is merely logic and probably doesn’t soothe anyone’s emotions, but it is true—and realizing that may help somewhat. We may think that we are protecting ourselves from a reoccurrence of something unpleasant through fear, but we are only tormenting ourselves. And the truth is that fearing it wouldn’t prevent it from happening anyway. We would be better off spending our energy praying and trusting God!
The apostle Paul wrote that the mind of the flesh is sense and reason without the Holy Spirit (see Romans 8:6). We are called to live a life of faith, and that often has nothing to do with logic. God leads us from our spirit, not from our head. The person who relies too much on their intellect finds it very difficult to believe in and have an intimate relationship with God. Although sense and reason without the Holy Spirit is not a good idea, I believe that sense and reason (common sense) with the Holy Spirit is a very good idea. As we pray about the things in our lives for which we need answers, God will lead and guide us through His Holy Spirit. He often reveals simple and very practical things that we can do to help us in our situation. They are commonsense things that are very logical, and we should follow His advice.
I was shopping one day and purchased a small jar of skin care for my eyes. When I was paying, the clerk asked if I knew I could purchase a second jar for 50 percent off. I did not know that, and I decided it would be a good deal. Then I asked if all the products in that brand were being offered at the same sale price. She said that they were and I immediately (and I might add emotionally) went back to the items and started choosing pairs of several things. Then I took a minute and thought it over. I asked myself, Do I really need these items? What else do I already have at home in similar products? Then the thought came to me that other things would be on sale at another time and that I didn’t need to spend money just to think I was saving money. I made my original purchase and left. In this instance I was being reasonable and logical (I believe with God’s guidance), and it was a good thing.
Shopping is quite different from a tormenting phobia, but the principle is the same. I have learned that God’s principles can be applied anywhere we need them. The next time you recognize a fear of any kind tempting you, try talking to yourself about it a little and look at it logically and reasonably. Normally when emotion flares up, all logic disappears, but it doesn’t have to.
I recall a day 46 years ago when I spent an afternoon sitting on top of the kitchen table waiting for my husband to get home because I had captured a mouse in the bathroom and was afraid it would get out!! I can tell you that there was no logic that day at all. Had I thought about it reasonably, I could have realized that the mouse (which was a baby) had no way or desire to harm me in the first place. Even if I saw it again, how could it actually hurt me? It had no hands to reach or turn the doorknob on the bathroom door and get out, but I sat on the tabletop (I was eight months pregnant) and waited for Dave to get home. Multitudes of women are terrified of mice, and yet these creatures have no true ability to harm us.
When Dave did come home, he untied the bathroom door (yes, I had it tied to another door with a rope) and he found the mouse under the plunger where I had trapped it. It had suffocated and lay upside down, with all fours in the air. It was a pink baby about two inches long. Fierce, indeed! Ridiculous, to say the least, but that is a good example of what unreasonable fear will do to a person if they leave their emotions unchecked.
We need to be like the 84-year-old grandmother who fiercely maintained her independence and lived alone in the old family home. Her four children lived in the same town, but she rarely called them except in emergencies. It was with some apprehension, therefore, that one of her sons drove to her house one morning in answer to her phone call. When he arrived, she said she suspected that there was a burglar in her bedroom closet, since she had heard noises in there the night before. “Why didn’t you call me last night?” “Well,” she replied, “it was late and I hated to bother you, so I just nailed the closet shut and went to bed.” That’s the kind of attitude we can have when faced with fears of all kinds. Nail the door of fear shut and go to bed in calm assurance.4
We may perhaps close the door on many fears by being less emotional and applying more sense and reason in the Holy Spirit. Ask yourself, What can possibly happen if I don’t give in to this fear that is demanding unreasonable behavior from me? Quite often the answer will be, “Nothing will happen.”
Lloyd Douglas said, “If a man harbors any sort of fear, it percolates through all his thinking, damages his personality, and makes him landlord to a ghost.”5 In other words, he wastes his time on something that isn’t even a reality.
It is reported that 6.3 million Americans have a diagnosed phobia. Just imagine how many suffer with these crippling and unreasonable fears and keep them a secret. Statistics state that 60 percent of the things people fear will never take place, 90 percent of the things feared are considered to be insignificant, and 88 percent of things feared in relation to health will never happen.6
I realize it is easier for me to be logical about these phobias because I don’t have them. I have empathy for people who suffer with these problems, and I realize that the symptoms they have can seem overwhelming. And although some of the spiritual solutions that I am offering are somewhat simple, we often find that the answers to complicated problems are simple. We look for complicated answers to complicated problems, but the simple truth of God’s Word is that He loves us, and all things are possible with Him. Come to Him in faith like a little child and believe that He can set you free.
We often find that the answers to complicated problems are simple.
A man who is afraid of everything dies a thousand deaths, but the courageous man dies only once. If we truly want to be free from fear, perhaps we could reason that no matter how difficult it would be to do the thing we fear, it wouldn’t be as bad as being afraid of it all of our lives.
While I was watching a program about people being treated for phobias, I realized that the doctors attending them were trying to find the root of their problem, reason with them and get them to the point where they would do what they were afraid of in order to get over it. I thought how amazing it was that these people had spent thousands and thousands of dollars to get advice that God gives us in His Word—free of charge. Don’t be afraid to face the real problem behind the phobia. The man who is afraid of beautiful women is actually dealing with a deep-rooted insecurity in himself and a belief that no attractive woman would be interested in him. He is not actually afraid of beautiful women; he is afraid of himself, or afraid that he doesn’t meet the standard of what he imagines he should be. The woman I heard about who exercised her infant’s tiny arms and legs in an effort to be sure the child never became overweight was actually afraid of her own large body size.
The only way to conquer fear is to confront it and to do the thing you are afraid of. Let me add that it should be something that actually needs to be done. If you are afraid of flying and you never need to fly anywhere, then just forget it. But if your fear of flying is adversely affecting your life, do it afraid and get beyond it. If you’re afraid of pigs, then just don’t go in a pigpen, but if you’re afraid of open spaces, you will need to go out… even if you have to do it afraid. If you don’t, you will be a prisoner all of your life. When we do confront things, we always find that the worst part of the fear was in our minds, and that the reality of the thing wasn’t as bad as we had imagined.
I once heard a story, which I told in my book The Confident Woman. It was about a village where the children were told, “Whatever you do, don’t go near the top of the mountain. It’s where the monster lives.” One day, some brave young men decided they wanted to see the monster and defeat it. Halfway up the mountain, they encountered a huge roar and a terrible stench. Half the men ran down the mountain, screaming. The other half of the men got farther up the mountain and noticed that the monster was smaller than they had expected—but it continued to roar and emit such a stench that all but one man ran away. As he took another step forward, the monster shrank to the size of a man. Another step and it shrank again. It was still hideously ugly and stank, but the man could actually pick it up and hold it in the palm of his hand. He said to the monster, “Who are you?” In a tiny, high-pitched voice, the monster squeaked, “My name is fear.”
Just as the monster got smaller and smaller with each step the man took toward it, so our fears will become smaller and smaller the more we confront them.
Wrong thoughts lead to wrong actions and reactions. If you are dealing with fear in general or some specific fear, I encourage you to examine your thought life and you may quickly find the source of your problem. Fearful thoughts will never produce a fearless life! I had the joy of writing a book many years ago called Battlefield of the Mind. It is about the warfare that goes on in our mind that is induced by the devil as he attempts to build strongholds in our thinking that will eventually control our behavior. This book has been used by God to set many people free from irrational fears and other addictive behaviors. It teaches us how to think properly and when we do, improper thoughts find no entrance or place to take root and grow.
I recall one woman who testified that she had dealt unsuccessfully with bulimia for years. This disorder causes a person to eat excessively and then make him- or herself vomit in an effort to not gain weight. If this process is repeated often, it can do tremendous damage to the individual’s health. She had been in many treatment programs unsuccessfully, but testified that upon reading Battlefield of the Mind she gained insight that she had not previously had. She realized her thoughts were controlling her emotions and knew that only right thinking could help her gain freedom. When she felt the urge to make herself vomit after eating, she took her Battlefield of the Mind book to the bathroom with her and read it on her knees in front of the toilet. She shared that the truth she found in the book’s message gave her the strength not to give in to the addiction that was stealing her life and health, and she was eventually set completely free.
Anytime you feel afraid, you should change your thinking. You don’t have to think on whatever falls into your mind, but you can choose your own thoughts and should do so very carefully. Many people do not realize they can cast down one thought and choose another, but they can, and they must if they ever hope to control their actions. God’s Word teaches us that as a man thinks, so does he become (see Proverbs 23:7). Right thinking will lead to right living!
The symptoms of fear, both emotional and physical, that people experience will end up controlling their behavior if they don’t recognize them for what they are and confront them. When fear is present, we might experience a variety of symptoms ranging from a mild feeling of nervousness, to anxiety and panic attacks that require a hospital visit. People shake, sweat, their heart may race rapidly, or they may feel weak physically. If their breathing is affected, they may start to hyperventilate, making them feel they are suffocating, and that turns into a panic attack. These symptoms make us want to run from whatever is causing the fear. In fact, part of the definition of fear is to take flight or run away from. In short, fear does bring torment on many different levels.
Most people experience the milder symptoms of fear, and it would be easier for them to decide they are going to “do it afraid” no matter what. For those who experience more serious symptoms, they might need to do what they fear a tiny bit at a time, and each time they see progress it will encourage them to believe that they can do even more the next time. The Holy Spirit knows us intimately, and we can trust Him to never move us along any faster than we are able to go.
The Holy Spirit knows us intimately, and we can trust Him to never move us along any faster than we are able to go.
During the years I was being healed from the sexual and emotional abuse I endured from my father, I was set free in tiny degrees. As the Holy Spirit led me to confront one issue at a time, I experienced freedom. On some occasions I seemed to get over huge obstacles in one leap of faith, but at other times freedom came so slowly that admittedly it often seemed that I was making no progress at all even though I was. The Word of God speaks often of “walking” in faith, or “walking in love,” or “walking in the Spirit.” Walking is the slowest mode of travel known to man. Walking requires one step after another and another and another, but eventually we get where we are going if we don’t give up along the way. It may take some time, but I encourage you to keep “walking” toward total freedom from fear.