Sean took her hand and led her toward the house. Her grip tightened as they moved closer to the entrance. Her wide eyes spoke of the memories assailing her. The fear gripping her. He needed to re-focus her thoughts.
“Ye and yer brother were happy here sometimes?”
She turned to him as if she’d forgotten he was there then smiled. “Yea. We were. Sometimes.”
It was a small, one room building, dark and smelling of sheep and mold. Thomasina immediately saw to taking care of the rushes. Niall worked on starting a fire in the open hearth at the rear. Lachlann lit the candle on the trestle table centered in the middle of the room then went to the wooden plank partially hidden beneath. He lifted it up, revealing a hollowed out area in the earthen floor. First he withdrew a covered clay crock then a large, cloth-encased hunk of cheese and replaced the wooden door.
“I’m starving.” He broke off a piece of the cheese, popped it into his mouth, and turned to face Sean. “Do ye need a wedding feast?”
“It may be nice but not necessary. Unless Thomasina prefers it.” He spoke the words as she returned with thick, winter grass that she tossed about the floor to cover the hard-packed dirt.
“A feast?” Thomasina shrugged. “Any food would be a feast to me. I’m starving.”
She went to the trestle table and opened the crock. She smelled it. “I put these up just a bit ago. They smell good.”
With two hands she carried the container to the fire and placed it close to the flame. “This will be good for tonight. Dunna eat all the cheese, Lachlann.”
He stopped chewing when all eyes were on him. “I will not.” He had trouble saying the words with his mouth full.
Thomasina glanced around before heading toward an area Sean had not noticed. A thick tapestry hung from the wood beam, closing it off from the rest of the room. She secured the heavy material to one side with a cord. The space was barely large enough to stand in with the pallet and a small chest. Sean’s heart squeezed seeing the small area she had for her own and her meager belongings. Thomasina deserved so much more.
She kneeled in front of the chest and lifted the top of the coffer. With great reverence, she began to pull out what appeared to be a gown. She turned suddenly toward him, dropping the material and stood. “I need but a moment.”
Pulling the hanging back into place, she enclosed herself within. Sean glanced at the other two who were watching him.
“Methinks she prepares herself for ye.” Niall said. “And I believe we have some business to attend to.”
“Yea.” Sean slipped the tie off the contract and unrolled it on top of the table. Lachlann and Niall moved in close. “This is what I bring to the marriage.”
The other two read the neatly written words conveying Sean’s worth and worldly holdings which he offered to his wife at their joining. Once finished, they exchanged glances and stood up as one.
Sean helped himself to the jug of mead set back on the shelf behind the trestle. “Shall we have a drink before signing?”
Niall moved in close, glancing toward where Thomasina was still ensconced. “I had no idea of yer wealth. Are ye cer—”
“Dunna say it.” Sean’s tone was sharp but to put a price on his feelings for Thomasina would not be done. “I had this written up with the intention of marrying a woman whom I had no true love for. An infatuation. The feelings I have for yer sister come from deep in my heart. It runs like blood in my veins. Dunna say Thomasina is not of equal value to me. Her value surpasses all that I have—Nae, all that I could ever hope to attain in this lifetime. Her worth is beyond measure and that she is willing to take me and give me the honor of having her to wife is worth more than all the gold in the world to me. Dunna speak of this to her, I beg ye.”
Niall nodded, a somber expression. “I see no reason to discuss it further.” He took the quill and ink tucked in the far corner to add his signature before handing it to Sean.
The intensity of emotion threatened to overwhelm Sean. He swallowed and tried not to burst out into song or smile like a fool. Bending his head, he made his signature in strong, bold letters. He exhaled.
“May God also add his blessing to this union,” Niall said. He held the jug up in the air. “Let us drink.”
Each man took a hefty swallow. A movement in the corner caught Sean’s eye. A vision he had longed to see. Thomasina stood dressed in a light blue gown that hugged every womanly curve, her brushed auburn hair cascading around her shoulders fell past her hips. Her eyes were downcast, her unease more than apparent as she waited for a response. He walked to her, stopping at arm’s length.
“Thomasina, ye are as beautiful as I imagined ye to be.”
She tipped her head up, a smile lighting up her face. Her green eyes sparkled in the firelight. “Ye imagined me?”
“Yea.”
“In a dress?”
“Yea, every way. While awake and asleep.” He glided one hand down her hair, pausing to rub a wavy lock between his fingers to feel its silkiness. “I never imagined yer hair quite so soft.”
She turned a pretty shade of pink. Niall stepped up to take her hand and brought her to stand in front of the trestle. Sean came up beside her, not daring to touch her for fear he wouldn’t be able to stop. He’d imagined she would be a beautiful lass but the real thing was a bit like getting a fist to the gut and the wind knocked out of you. If he’d have seen her at some gathering, he’d have been drawn to her. That certainty encouraged him.
When she glanced toward him, he could see her nerves threatening to get the better of her. He smiled. A smile meant to ease any fears. A smile meant to show he had no doubts. A smile meant to convey his intense pleasure at marrying her.
Niall took the place on the opposite side of the table. “Well, I take the position as head of the family since our father is a drunkard. Does anyone object?”
Heads nodded in agreement.
“Then let it be so.” Niall cleared his throat, his voice suddenly sounding tight. “I find this man, Sean of the MacNaughton Clan, a good man with much to offer to my only sister including home, protection, and the promise of children.”
“I accept this man’s offer of marriage and willingly agree to this contract where we have both affixed our names but I take yer desires to heart, Thomasina. Do ye find him acceptable as one ye can cleave unto as the scriptures ordain?”
All turned to Thomasina. Her wide eyes and raised brows assured Sean that this was not the normal route her clan took to marriage. Her face lighting up convinced him she was more than pleased to have her say. “Yea. I find him acceptable as my husband.”
He directed himself to Sean. “Do ye offer her yer love and promise to take none other and do ye vow to care for her as yer own body?”
“Yea.”
He turned to Thomasina. “Do ye offer him yer respect even when ye’re mad as hell? And agree to not withhold yerself from him?”
“Yea.”
Niall placed a long length of silken ribbon along the table. “Place yer hands together.”
Sean and Thomasina flattened their palms together.
Niall tied the ribbon as one around their wrists then continued wrapping. “With the tying of this ribbon, like the joining of yer lives, may yer strength be measured no longer as two but as one. For as two have joined together as one, having the blessing of our Lord, no man may break the tie that binds.”
He ended with a small bow atop their fingers. “And as the kiss symbolizes the acceptance of this unbreakable bond, Sean, ye may kiss yer wife and Tom—Thomasina, ye may kiss yer husband.”
Lachlann cheered and Niall joined in, slapping each other on the back as if they’d accomplished a great feat. Sean leaned in toward her, their bound hands a slight hindrance to the embrace. When she tipped her head up for his kiss, he felt suddenly shy and hesitated. He searched her lovely face to remember forever. This was where he belonged. This was the woman intended for him. This was where his happily ever after would be found.
He became overwhelmed with the need to tell her how he felt. Quite a revelation for the man who does not share how he feels. But with Niall and Lachlann watching them, this was not the time. He set it aside. Tonight would be soon enough to admit his feelings to her. He touched his lips to hers, savoring her taste, her smell, her timid response.
“A drink!” Lachlann held up the jug.
Thomasina tensed. A glance at her confirmed she preferred to not imbibe.
“Methinks yer lovely sister is quite intoxicating enough for me.” Sean said, then leaned closer toward Niall. “Perhaps ye would do us the honor of giving us some peace now?”
Lachlann’s jaw dropped. “We would miss Tommy’s cooking. I can smell it!”
Niall put an arm around his friend. “We will allow them their time, Lachlann.” He spoke over his shoulder. “We will see to ourselves.”
Sean pushed the door shut, having to wiggle it into place to do so. He turned toward Thomasina who went with him, their hands still joined. His chest expanded at the sight of her standing there. “Ye are lovely dressed as a lass, my Thomasina.”
She held his gaze. “I like being yer Thomasina.”
He closed the distance pulling their joined hands to his chest, untied the bow, and kissed her upturned palm.
“Was that unkind of us to kick them out into the night?” she asked.
“Not to my way of thinking.” Sean moved in close, placing a kiss on her cheek. Her sweet womanly scent stirred him.”Is it to yers?”
Her eyes were closed, her lips slightly parted. She shook her head. Gathering her in close, he held her tight against the length of his body. He took a deep breath, near to bursting with desire for her. That would not be the way of it. Not tonight. He needed to move slowly and see to her pleasure. Her stomach growled and they both laughed.
“Methinks ye need sustenance.”
Thomasina stepped away. “Methinks ye’re right. Are ye hungry?”
Only for ye. “Yea.”
“It must be hot enough.”
His eyes remained on her as she went to the fire. The dress swaying softly against her curves. Titillating him. “And what is this that ye make so well that it has our long-haired friend’s tongue all but hanging out?”
“A mix of the hardy squash and herbs ’tis all. It stores well.” She carefully removed the lid.
A delicious aroma filled the room. His own stomach gurgled. “We should eat.”
“Yea.” She filled two wooden plates and carried them to the trestle table where he’d dragged one of the hard benches. He motioned for her to sit beside him. “’Tis best to eat before… sleeping.”
Sean suddenly cared very much about offending her with ribald comments. He knew he’d feel differently when she was attired as a lass. There had only been one woman he’d thought to impress and that was Brighit. It wasn’t like that with Thomasina. He wanted her to be pleased with him as her husband, not impressed.
The food was warm and tasty. He ate with relish. “Very good.”
She took a piece of the cheese and passed it to him. “I have cooked for my father and brother a very long time.”
“Lovely and a good cook. What else do I not ken about ye?”
Thomasina swallowed her cheese and placed her hands on her lap. “That I feel very special to have ye as my husband.”
Her declaration surprised him. A fierce need to pleasure her as his wife overtook him. No one had ever meant this much to him. He struggled to keep his breathing even, his appetite vanished, and he watched intently as she finished her food. He offered her the mead. “Just a little?”
She tipped her head and accepted it. He declined when she offered it back. He dare not allow himself to relax. He needed to be in complete control when he bedded her. Rushing her to see to his own need was not the way he wanted it to be with her. Ever.
When Sean stood beside her and extended his hand, Thomasina’s heart beat faster. It was difficult to breathe. She accepted his hand and stood, fighting to appear composed despite the anxiety expanding in her gut. With a finger under her chin, he tipped her head up so he could see into her eyes.
“I want to make love to ye, Thomasina.”
She swallowed then nodded, pressing her lips together before speaking. “Yea. Of course. We’re husband and wife.”
He smiled. A kind, warm smile that told her beyond any doubt that he understood how she was feeling.
“Apologies. I’m such a milksop.”
Sean placed a finger to her lips to stop her. “Nae. Do not speak poorly of yerself. Not with me.” He moved in closer, gently pulling her length against him. “I believe ye’re perfect just the way ye are. Dunna be telling me otherwise.”
He smelled of the outdoors. A calming scent. She took a slow breath. With her eyes closed, she imagined their bodies as they touched. His strong arms wrapping lightly around her. She snuggled in closer and they tightened in response. His solid chest beneath her cheek, the light smattering of hair she would enjoy caressing hidden beneath. His solid hips against her own, the hardened tarse against her belly, the solid legs pressing into her.
When he slipped his hand along her back, he turned her in his arms and pulled her bottom solidly against his manhood. He dipped his head to kiss the side of her head. “Ye will have pleasure as my wife.”
A shiver of anticipation washed over her. It settled somewhere between her thighs. “I ken.”
He turned her again and pulled back to look at her. “And I heard ye were not so worldly as all that.”
She smiled, her tension easing a bit. “Yea. I talk a good talk.”
When she looked up to see into his eyes, he closed the distance to her mouth. A feather light kiss stirred her passion, overwhelming her fear. She parted her lips, allowing his tongue access. His kiss became more impassioned and she matched him as he stoked the spark of desire into a flame.
His strong hands dipped again to her bottom, cupping her cheeks, pulling her up against him. “Have I told ye how much I admire yer lovely arse?”
Thomasina tried not to laugh. “Nae. Nae ye have not.”
“Ye find humor in my discomfort?”
She sobered quickly. “I dunna understand.”
“This fine arse,” he grasped her bottom as he spoke, “filled my dreams even before I caught ye in the woods, baring yer bottom.”
Thomasina gasped and started to pull away but he held her firm.
“Ye’ve a fine arse.” He nibbled at her neck. “I dinna mean to shame ye. Never that.”
“So ye did see my naked bottom?”
He groaned, pulling her in tight against him leaving no doubt what he was feeling. “Yea. It damned near killed me and seeing ye in those trews, outlining each rounded cheek.”
A guttural sound emanated from deep inside him and he stilled. His breathing labored. He took a deep breath then pulled away to sit on the bench behind him, his hands on his legs.
“I lusted after ye, Thomasina. Something fierce.” He licked his lips. His eyes roaming over her. As before he paused at her breasts and looked left then right.
“Tell me then how did ye ken I was a lass?”
He looked up at her and it seemed to take a moment for his answer. “I knew ye were a woman when I touched yer full breast.”
Sean reached an arm toward her bosom. He traced his fingers along each breast, cupping their fullness then stroking her rigid nipples. She closed her eyes at the intensity of longing sweeping through her.
“Ye’re a bonny lad.” He urged her closer to stand between his legs. “A more bonny lass.”
He turned his head to rest his cheek against her. She felt certain he could feel her heart beat against him.
“And ’tis fine with ye that I am not man enough?”
Thomasina reminded him of his earlier taunts.
He pulled back, a lopsided grin on his face. “Yea. ’Tis more than fine. As a lass, I find ye lacking nothing. I should not have taunted ye so but I had a hard time keeping my hands off ye.”
The intensity of his gaze slowly sweeping over her heated her skin, as if it were his hands caressing her. “I want ye something fierce, Sean.” She repeated his earlier words.
He looked up at her. “Yea? Ye’re a brave one.”
Hooking an arm behind her knees, he took her into his arms and walked to the pallet in the corner. He nuzzled through her hair, kissed her neck, then allowed her legs to drop. “Ye’re a bonny one indeed,” he untied the bow at the back, pulling at the laces with each word, “and methinks ye’re even more bonny beneath.”
The gown loosened and he slipped it down her arms. She couldn’t catch her breath as he watched its movement slipping from her, revealing a shoulder. A breast. A navel. He pulled her close, his tongue circling her nipple before he sucked it into his mouth. She fought to hold back her groan of pleasure. He slid the gown down as he continued the assault of one breast and then the other. His mouth warm against her skin.
Wetness pooled in her most intimate area and she held her legs closed. She bit her lip to keep from making a sound as her body arched against him. His hand on her bottom, grasping and stroking, made her pulse quicken. She tried to keep her lips closed.
Sean had wondered at the responsiveness of her body at his ministrations. Cantering hips. Arching back. Grasping hands. Clearly she was aroused and that pleased him. When he saw her biting her lip, he knew why her passion seemed muted. He took a deep, shaky breath and sat down on the coffer. He was near to exploding and this wonderful, little treasure was trying not to make a sound. Perhaps he moved too fast.
“Come.” Sean patted his lap. “I wish to hold my bride.”
She came willingly, if a little uncertain, and sat on his lap. His eyes dropped to her rosy nipples, begging to be suckled but glanced at her face. “Kiss me, Thomasina.”
He saw the flash of pleasure in her eyes. She tipped her head toward him, her lips soft against his. Timid. Then she became more forceful. Wrapping her hand around his head, she pulled him in closer as her tongue sparred with his own. He’d thought allowing her to go at her own pace might help cool his need but she was quickly pushing him over the edge.
Thomasina started to pull at his leine. “I want to see ye.”
He reluctantly withdrew his hands and she stood away from him. Her lips parted, she watched as he doffed each piece of clothing. Her breathing accelerating. When he dropped his trews and his manhood sprang forth, she glanced at his face, her eyes widening. He could see the fear forming in her mind and he pulled her in close.
“Love making is not painful. ’Tis pleasurable. Perhaps the first time there may be some discomfort.”
“Ye’re going to rip me asunder with that thing.” She sounded near to tears.
“Where is my brave, Thomasina?”
She pulled back to give him a withering look. He smiled.
“I will not rip anything but yer maidenhead which needs to be taken.”
She said nothing but he could feel her body tensing.
“We can stop now if ye are afraid.”
“I am not afraid.” Thomasina pushed her shoulders back with the declaration.
“Then let us lie down for a bit.” Sean indicated the small pallet behind them.
Thomasina slid down against the wall and turned toward him. He lay on his back. “Will ye kiss me again?”
Her face lit up. Something she did enjoy. She began with an eager kiss that made him rock hard with its unspoken promises. He stroked her side then up her thigh and again between her legs. Her body was eager if her mind was not yet ready.
He covered her and cupped her breasts. With a firm tongue he stroked her nipples into hard buds, her moans a balm to his lust inflamed body. When she reached to pull his hip closer to her, he pushed her down. “Not yet. Let me show ye pleasure, Thomasina.”
Moving to her stomach, he kissed and laved as he dropped lower. He positioned himself between her legs, nibbling a hip as he worked his way to her core. He could smell her need and it nearly set him off. Her wetness was sweet on his tongue and he stroked her, long and deep. She pivoted, rocking against his mouth. He dipped a finger in and she bucked up, nearly dislodging him. She grasped at his head, pulling him in tighter. Out of necessity, he imagined himself in the cold ocean, the water gripping him. Then he tried to imagine standing naked in the cold snow. His body demanded distraction. There’d never been such a need for him to hold off his own pleasure but he would not be disappointing her.
Thomasina tried to focus on him. He watched her intently as if measuring her reaction. The pleasure he was giving her demanded all her attention. Her eyes closed and a guttural sound emanated from her throat. She reached to draw him up against her again.
He put his lips to her ear as he positioned himself between her legs. “Is túsa mo chroí.” Ye are my heart.
He moved in a slow rhythm.
This was not something she’d ever been warned of. Coupling was not to be enjoyable but this… this was more than enjoyable.
“Shall I end sooner?” He plunged deep within, touching her womb, pressing his hips against her then stilled. The pain, a slight sting then gone.
She finally looked at him. The words came back to her of the earlier claims of wanting to be done with him. She smiled.
“Oh yea, I do prefer ye not end sooner—” She gasped at the sudden, deep thrust. “—but much later.”
He grabbed her close against him, his hand cupping her bottom, nestling his nose in her hair.
“Good. I would not want to be exhibiting brutish behavior.”
And he gently moved against her, fitting perfectly between her thighs despite his massive muscles. He filled her perfectly.
“Well, maybe a little brutish.”
There was that noise again from deep inside. She tried to swallow it down.
“Nae, my Thomasina. Dunna hold back. Let me hear yer pleasure.”
He suddenly slowed, entering her with long, deliberate thrusts.
Her groan was loud in the small space. He did know what he was about.
“Yea. That is the way. Can ye feel me inside ye?”
She rocked her hips against him, pivoting to take him even deeper. The need for something she didn’t understand swept over her. She dug her nails into his back. Urging him on. Wanting more. Wanting— something.
“Easy.” Sean’s voice was low, vibrating through her. “Feel me in ye. We are one.”
Thomasina focused on the feelings that were rushing over her. Close to some pinnacle she didn’t comprehend until it burst through her. Her muscles convulsed around him. He responded with more deliberation, quickening his pace. His roar of pleasure erupted with his final thrust and he collapsed beside her, pulling her up against him.
She sighed. “Yea, Sean. Ye pleasured me well.”
Sean burst into a huge grin and hugged her to him. “Yea. As ye did me.”
“I dinna expect—I dinna ken what to expect.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I dinna expect such pleasure myself.”
She pulled back to look at him. “Truly?”
“Yea. I am not one for idle words.”
“Idle words?”
“What I say is true.” He looked her in the eyes. “Ye were the one intended for me. I need ye by my side always. I’ll protect ye with my life.” He pulled her in for a passionate kiss. “Mo chroí go deo thú.” My heart is yers forever.