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"No producing projects yet, but I'm sure I'll find something." Dad sounds chipper, but I feel bad. He hasn't worked since I did Off-Key, and I think he's bored."I have to interrupt. There is someone I've been dying for Kaitlin to meet," Mom says and pulls forward a wafer-thin forty-something woman with a deep tan, toned arms, and white blond hair. She's wearing the most gorgeous white Gucci suit, what I'm sure are real diamond pendant earrings, and a chunky gold necklace. On her ring finger is a diamond bigger than anything Harry Winston has ever lent me. This woman could double for one of the moms from The Real Housewives of New York City. "This is Nancy Walsh, wife of Tom Walsh, the New York real estate mogul.""Well, I wouldn't say mogul," Nancy drawls, and touches my mother's arm lightly. "Okay, maybe I would." She smiles at me. "Kaitlin, it is a pleasure. Your mother told me you're very eager to be part of the New York social circuit while you're in town."I don't recall saying that. I look at Mom out of the corner of my eye, and she raises her eyebrows menacingly at me. A double eyebrow raise mean serious business, so I nod at Nancy and smile."It's going to be quite tricky, dear, with that theater schedule of yours, but there are events during the day and on Mondays that you can attend. You'll have to jitney out to the Hamptons, but it's worth the effort if you want to be seen in the right places.""Which we do, Nancy," Mom tells her seriously. "We want to make an impact while we're on the East Coast. This may be a short trip, but my husband and I are enjoying it so much that we've talked about adding a second residence here. I had no idea charity work could be so rewarding."Here we go again. Nadine and I look at each other. Mom I could see, but Dad would never want to live here. He needs sun, sand, and big green areas to golf. I'm enjoying my extended stay, but I'm not sure I'm up for dual residencies. I really miss our private pool in this heat. And I am craving greenery. There are all these sweet little trees dotting the streets, but it's not the same as the tall rows of palm trees you see all over Los Angeles, or the lush, fountained parks and yards."Sweetie, I...," Dad starts to say. Mom doesn't let him interrupt."Kaitlin is exploring many options outside theater and who knows? One may take her east before she knows it. A lot of shows are filming here these days. My son, Matthew, is doing Scooby-Doo in Los Angeles, but we just heard they're planning to shoot three episodes in New York."Nancy takes a sip of her white wine and smiles knowingly. "It is the place to be, as they say." She looks at me. "And we'll make sure you're seen, Kaitlin. I've given your mother a list of important events that you must say yes to.""And she will," my mom responds for me."Your mom is cochairing some events," Nancy adds, "so I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot of each other this summer. My daughters Sabrina and Seraphina are huge fans and can't wait to see Meeting of the Minds.""Kaitlin will be sure to bring them backstage," Mom tells Nancy. Nadine is standing behind Mom and she looks like she wants to scream."That would be lovely." Nancy beams. Wow, her veneers are blinding! "I must say hi to Margaret Beatrow--you should too, Meg. Join me?""Of course!" Mom air kisses me on both cheeks and gets glimmering pink gloss on my cheeks. "Katie-kins, I've got to dash, but I'll try to make it over to your booth if I can spare five minutes. Bye, girls!""I should keep an eye on her." Dad winks at me. "You never know what she'll sign me--or us--up for without asking." I grab his tie and straighten it before he walks off."Good idea, Mr. Burke," Nadine calls after him. "Keep us posted." Nadine turns to us. "People wants a few photos and a short interview about the play, but be prepared to answer questions about Lauren and Ava. Then you guys should eat before heading over to the booth. You only have twenty minutes.""She means us, Liz. " Sky pokes Liz in the back, right above the new tattoo on her left shoulder. (It's the Japanese symbol for life. Liz is really proud of it, even if her dad was furious.) "Not you.""Obviously," Liz snaps as she slides into a red leather banquette and dips a fork into the gooey mac and cheese already waiting. "I can't imagine having to defend myself to People. That's more your area of expertise, Sky. Kates, I'll make sure I save some bananas Foster for you. I hear it's killer here."Sky's lip curls into a snarl and I pull her over to the reporter. Just as Nadine suspected, they ask our opinions about Ava and Lauren's latest video (Sky blasts the girls while I stand meekly in the background, afraid to say anything that might set the Paparazzi Twins off even more) and they ask us to give some tidbits about our upcoming turn on SNL. I talk a little bit about my play and the reporter tells me they're planning to review my turn in it in a few weeks. I'm not sure if that makes me excited or more nervous. Then talk turns to Sky's show."I'm just honored to be a part of such an amazing cast and I can't wait to get to work on such an important, highly life-changing program," Sky says, sounding as if she's accepting a Nobel Peace Prize rather than talking about her role as a ski bunny/sorority girl."So there is no truth to talk that your show's creator, Grady Travis, has battled the network over budget concerns?" the reporter asks.Sky looks momentarily flustered and picks at one of the small crystals on her manicured thumb. "No. No, we're ready to roll in a few weeks. Up to Vancouver. I still have to find some chic cold-weather ensembles. They do have clubs up there, don't they?"The reporter frowns. "I thought the production was moving to Los Angeles now. At least that was announced earlier today on the network website." She sticks her tape recorder closer to Sky's open mouth."I... I'm not sure what you're talking about," Sky says and starts tossing her hair all about like she always does when she's nervous. The reporter sneezes when Sky's hair brushes her face."Bless you! Los Angeles? For a show about Alaska?" I ask.The reporter sneezes again as Sky's hair whacks her face another time. "Grady was peeved too. Rumor is he's going to pull the show altogether if they don't reconsider Vancouver."Sky stops swinging. "What? That's impossible!"Uh-oh. I've got to get her out of here before she says something she regrets. "Look at the time," I tell the reporter. "We really should use ChapStick before our lips get action at the booth. Will you excuse us?" I pull Sky through the crowded room back out to the covered garden. Her body is limp and easy to drag."She's got to be wrong, right, K?" Sky sticks a powder-pink thumbnail in her mouth, biting down, which is something I've never seen her do before. "I mean, yeah, I'd rather be in Los Angeles, which is where I thought we were shooting originally, but now I'm kind of psyched for Vancouver and the show may not fly at all? We just had a cast round table at the upfronts! Grady was thrilled about the show. He can't pull it.""Calm down," I tell Sky and sit her down in a chair near the booth. I hand her a ChapStick from a large fish bowl.The kissing prep table is covered with lip-quenching products, mirrors, and perfumes. All things to help a star be more kissable if they choose not to use wax lips. Not that some of us need help in that area. There's a line for Zac Efron's table that wraps around the restaurant. To take Sky's mind off the show, I wave Vanessa over and we talk about upcoming L.A. parties. Then Sky and I apologize about a zillion times for the poseurs that tried to liplock Zac at MyHouse the other night. She knew it wasn't us, of course, but it still makes me mad that Lauren and Ava tried to make her think otherwise.Sky looks fornlornly at the mirror in front of her. "I need to be on a show, K. I have to have a show to go back to. What would I do? I have to work. I have to. I love working! I love TV! I can't imagine the new season starting and not being a part of it. Not having a cast to be part of or a soundstage to show up to every day. Can you?""Um, I sort of have to," I joke, but I look down and pull a little at the hem of my dress. It still hurts to think about."That's right!" Sky's jaw drops. "You don't have a TV contract. Just this little summer thingie.""The summer thingie happens to be Broadway," I say indignantly. "Now stop worrying. You can call your agent tomorrow. Right now we have some kissing to do."Sky takes a deep breath and reapplies her gloss in the mirror for the zillionth time. She makes a few practice fish kisses at the mirror. "You're right. I have to be professional. I'm sure there are tons of people waiting to pucker up to me.""Exactly." We head over to the booth, or should I say table. There is a large sign behind it that says "Read My Lips." Clever when you remember this is for a reading organization.Liz meets us at the table, and I see Sky scowl."Thank God you're here, Lizzie," I say quickly. "Sky is going to have a huge line, so you can help us do crowd control."Liz practically chokes on the French fry she's eating. "I doubt that. I'm here to take pictures of you being naughty." Liz side-eyes Sky. "If you ever tick me off, Kates, I can use the photos for collateral." I have a feeling that's a thinly veiled threat toward Sky, but I don't say anything. Liz pulls me aside. "Did you tell Austin you were doing this?"I shake my head, and Liz's smoky eyes drop. "Should I have?" I squeak.Liz groans. "Kates, you're doing a kissing booth! You know, kissing other people. Austin would want to know.""I'm kissing people for charity!" I insist. "That's different." I bite my lip. "Right?"Liz stuffs another fry in her mouth. She mumbles, but I watch her mouth and can make out everything she's saying. "I'm not saying you shouldn't be doing this, I'm just saying your boyfriend, who is thousands of miles away, might want to know before he sees the photos in People. If I were you, I would call him ASAP. "Liz is right. I'm such an idiot! This is something I should have told Austin about. Not the cute little Rebecca Taylor tank I scored half off at a sale. But in my defense, it's not like I've kept tonight from him. We haven't talked in three long days. We keep missing each other's calls, and then with the time change we never get to talk at night. We text, but I'm starting to see it's really not the same thing.We didn't talk today either. It's almost as if... no, I couldn't have... forgotten to call him. I'm getting frustrated. Already. And we've got a long time apart to go."I'll call him as soon as we're done," I promise Liz."Do you have your wax lips, girls?" Olivia walks over and holds out a few extra pairs. I hold up mine, and Sky grabs a pair from Olivia this time. ("Just in case," she tells me.)I'm still feeling a little anxious about this Austin snafu, but the People photographer is waiting, so I push the thoughts aside. The photographer takes photos of Sky and me hamming it up. I hold my wax lips by my butt and Sky kisses them. Then we pretend to hold our wax lips up and let them kiss. Sky even has her wax lips kiss a photo of Ava and Lauren that a fan brought."I'll start the clock NOW, " Olivia tells us when we're finished with pictures. She clicks a little electronic timer. "If you have a longer line, we can always add time, okay? Have fun!"We do! We kiss a bunch of cute, chubby babies, some nervous teen boys, and some stuffy society types. Some of our celeb friends pop over too, like Channing Tatum, Jimmy Fallon, and Chace Crawford (who I don't think either of us minded kissing). As I hand a baby back to his mother, I look up and see Dylan. He's wearing a crisp white button-down shirt that is unbuttoned at his neck, a black vest, and dark denim pants. He smiles and my palms start to sweat, which is so weird."Not shabby, Burke," Dylan says, and before I can say hi, I realize what he's said and freeze."What did you call me?" I ask, momentarily stunned.Dylan's smile fades. "Burke. Isn't that your last name?"I nod slowly and then try to compose myself. "Yeah. It's just. Nothing." I laugh it off, but I start playing with my bracelets anyway. "My boyfriend calls me Burke."Dylan nods. "I guess that's why you look like you've seen a ghost! Sorry about that. I bet you're itching to get back to L.A. next week and see him.""I am," I admit. "What are you doing off tonight?""Understudies are getting their due," Dylan tells me. "Since our lovely leading lady doesn't start for a few more weeks, Forest is rotating in the second players and giving us blokes a few nights off. Did you get my message on your mobile?"I nod. "About dinner at the Monkey Bar on Monday night? Yes.""Can you go?" he asks. "I want to check out some of these scene-y haunts, and I thought you might too."My heart beats a little faster, and I blush. "I do," I can't help saying. And it would be totally fun with Dylan. Then I think of Austin again. "But I have to check my schedule."Dylan nods. "Sure. We can run lines beforehand too, if you're free. I know you're a bit worried about the second act. I made some notes on a script for you. I would have brought it tonight if I'd known you'd be here."Dylan is really sweet. "Thanks. That's so nice.""No problem," Dylan says and fingers a button on his vest. "I'm here with Riley tonight, but I lost her by the mob at Zac Efron's table."I start to frown. I can't help myself. Dylan laughs."You're not a fan of Riley's, I know. She's giving you a rough go, huh?" Dylan asks."No, not really," I lie. But she is. If I have to hear, "Maybe you do it in the movies that way, but, Kaitlin, in theater we stand like this, so our voices carry. I thought you would have known that" one more time, I may cry."She's tough, but I promise she's a cub once you get to know her," Dylan says. "She and Meg were fierce mates. She just misses her.""Who is this?" Sky drapes herself over my shoulder. "K, aren't you going to introduce me?""And me?" Liz grabs Dylan's hand. "Hi. I'm Kaitlin's best friend, Liz. We'll be seeing each other a lot this summer, seeing as how I'm in town for a writing and directing workshop at NYU.""A university girl." Dylan's eyes twinkle. "Cool.""I'll be in town too for various things as well," Sky coos.For two girls who have boyfriends, they sure are worked up over Dylan. They're all over him! Not that I can blame them. He's a dish. A very, very hot dish.I make the introductions. "Sky, Liz, meet Dylan. Dylan, meet Liz and Sky. Sky was my costar on Family Affair. Dylan is my colleague in Meeting of the Minds.""Lucky you." Sky runs her big brown eyes over Dylan and shakes his hand. "Are you here for a kiss?"Dylan looks at where he's standing--at the front of the line--and laughs. "I guess so, since I'm queuing. Which one of you wants to go first?""Queuing?" Sky asks."Oh, you Americans say in line, right?" Dylan asks.Sky and Liz can only manage nods. They've turned into mush."Queue, line, who cares." Sky is massaging his shoulder, and Dylan looks a little uncomfortable. "Do you want a kiss? I'm ready!"I can't help but blush. I feel strange kissing Dylan. We share one kiss in the play, near the end of the second act, but we haven't rehearsed it yet, and I feel weirdly glad about that. I don't want to get practice in now."There you are," Riley says as she pushes her way to the front of the line. "Oh, hi, Kaitlin." She sees me and smiles coldly, which goes well with the ice-blue halter top she's wearing with skinny black trousers. I wouldn't expect the blue to look good with her pale coloring, but it works for Riley, not that I would tell her that. "What are you doing here?" she asks. "I thought Forest might have had you make a go of the show for practice tonight. All the second-string players are performing. I guess he didn't think you were ready.""This must be Riley." Liz looks at her sharply."You think?" Sky seconds. "What gave it away? The bony butt or the frigid attitude?""Excuse me?" Riley asks. "These two are cheeky. Are they your friends?""Yes," I tell her, raising my chin proudly."Were you referring to both of us?" Liz asks, pointing to Sky. I shoot her a look.Riley nods. "It's so nice to have friends in town. Mine are across the pond. I can't be distracted. Theater is a lot of work and I like to concentrate fully on my character development.""I'm sure Kaitlin does too, Riley," Dylan says gently and winks at me."Absolutely," Riley agrees. "She's devoted so much of her time to studies," she tells Liz and Sky. "And she'll get it, I'm sure, eventually. Right, Kaitlin, dear? Like the lingo." Riley starts to chuckle. "Sorry, Kaitlin, I don't mean to laugh. It was just so charming that time you thought the ABTT was an ABBA Theater fan club!"I color slightly. How was I supposed to know that the ABTT was the Association of British Theatre Technicians? This is all new to me, and quite frankly, I don't see what any of it has to do with whether or not I can actually act. And yet, I've never been so unsure of my acting."EWW. " Sky crosses her arms over her bustier top, crushing the silk and making me cringe, and stares rudely at Riley."Excuse me?" Riley asks, trying to smile, but not succeeding. "Was I talking to you?""Thank God, no, but I'm talking to you," Sky says. "Just for a sec, of course. I don't really like you. And I don't like you picking on K for not knowing some stupid tech term. Like, who cares? Let me ask you something: Do you know what a honeywagon is? Or what dress to camera means?"Riley looks flustered. "No...""Those are movie set terms," Sky says smoothly and starts whipping her hair around again like a sword. It hits Riley in the mouth, and she practically chokes. "Something you'd know nothing about since you've never actually been on a movie set, have you?" Riley shakes her head slowly. "I figured as much. Must be tough living on theater wages too, from the look of that Marc Jacobs knockoff top."HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER FIVE: Riley may have her theater terms, but we movie actors have our terms too. A honeywagon is a discreet term for the crew's portable toilet truck. And dressing to camera means placing an object or a person in the best spot to be seen on camera. There are tons of other terms that would take all year for me to tell you, but some of my favorite are: Doris Day Parking (the best parking spot on the lot), Perrier meeting (a meeting that only lasts till a person's Perrier is gone), twin Ts (or twin peaks--a shot that is framed from the chest up), and shower curtain (a large, clear sheet used to soften lights). Take that, Riley!"I'm tired, Dylan," Riley says stiffly as she stares down Sky. Sky doesn't even blink. "Doing eight shows a week and giving it your all takes a lot out of people who are serious about their commitments."Liz is staring at me, her eyes drilling into mine. She's telepathically telling me to come back at this girl, but I can't. I'm not sure I'll ever feel less awkward around Riley, even after my (hopefully) positive theater reviews come in."Dylan can't yet," Sky tells her, and pulls Dylan toward her by the collar of his white shirt. "First he has some kissing to do."Before Dylan can protest, and without her wax lips as a buffer, Sky plants one on my stunned costar. The kiss seems to go on forever and Riley stands by, looking flustered. I watch the kiss in awe. Finally Sky releases him. "K, your turn."I look at Dylan's green eyes and feel a flutter in my stomach."I think you gave Dylan a long enough kiss for both of us," I say nervously."I agree. " Riley seconds. "Dylan, let's go."I lock eyes with Sky. She can sense the same thing that I'm feeling now. Riley has a crush on Dylan. And letting Sky know that is Riley's worst nightmare. Sky holds on to a stunned Dylan and plays with his collar while he blushes. "Not until he kisses K! Don't you want to, Dylan? It's for charity.""Don't bully him, Sky," I tell her.Liz stares at Riley crossly. "Kates, you can't skip Dylan. He's a paying customer."While everyone argues over us, Dylan and I make eye contact. He actually doesn't look uncomfortable--he's smiling at me a little, and I can feel my ears flush red. I look away.Is Liz crazy? Kissing babies is one thing, but kissing Dylan is another. Austin would freak. Then again, kissing Chace Crawford wasn't much better. I'm already doomed. I look up again. Dylan looks amazing tonight. My breath catches in my throat.Riley stares at my friends in horror. "Dylan, we're holding up the queue. Let's go.""I, um," Dylan looks at me still with that lopsided, good-natured smirk. "I guess it's good practice for the show, right? And it's for charity.""Right," I say, sounding professional. Riley glares.Sky pushes me forward. "Kiss him," she demands.The People photographer has caught on to the chaos and moves in for a close shot. Great. Just great."Hurry up, K, we have a line waiting!" Sky insists, her voice growing louder and more impatient. "It's just a kiss! Do you think Trevor cares who I kiss?" Her face goes blank. "I mean, do you think Trevor cares that I kiss someone for charity? No."Sky is right. This is for charity. One kiss can't hurt, right? I grab my wax lips and stand on my tiptoes. All I can see are Dylan's eyes. I close my own and feel my wax lips ripped out of my hands."What are you, two? You have to kiss him onstage anyway!" Sky insists. She grabs me by the arm and steers me around the table, which was the only barrier between me and Dylan. She shoves me toward Dylan, and he catches me. His arms linger around my bare shoulders, and I can barely breathe. "No wax lips.""But--" I protest. My skin is starting to feel prickly."I'm not sure about that," Liz says worriedly. "The photographer--""It's okay, Kaitlin," Dylan looks down at me. Wow, he is tall. "You don't have to if you don't want to.""It's not that," I start to explain.I am momentarily blinded by the first flash and then another and then another. Sky is yelling in my ear, Liz is pulling on my arm, and Riley swears under her breath (a British term I shouldn't repeat), but I'm mesmerized by Dylan's eyes. They're really nice and his dimpled grin is so cute. I don't think, I just act. I grab Dylan's vest lapel, pull him in close, and lay one on him. And...Wow. Really wow.His lips are softer than I imagined and feel different. Different from Austin's is all I can think, but my heart's racing anyway. Dylan leans into the kiss and doesn't pull away.This is nice. Really nice. My shoulders relax and... OH MY GOD! WHAT AM I DOING?I let Dylan go, but the camera flashes continue to pop. My face is beet red. I hope you can't tell in the photos. Actually, I take that back. I hope you can, for once, so Austin will know I didn't like it.Even if I did.Sky looks satisfied. "There! Was that so hard?"Dylan smiles at me and I try to smile back, but inside I feel all weird and squishy, like I do if I eat ice cream too fast or eat too many Oreos.I feel... guilty."Next!" Sky says. "Bye-bye, RI-LEE! Bye, Dyl!""See you Monday?" Dylan asks, his face totally calm and relaxed, as if he kisses other people's significant others every day of the week. Oh yeah. I guess we both do. We're actors. "At rehearsal? Then maybe Monkey Bar?""Rehearsal, yes," I tell him, and stop myself there. "See you then.""K, snap out of it," Sky says, as I watch him walk off. "We have paying customers waiting.""Right, right," I agree. I wipe my lips with a baby wipe and quickly apply more ChapStick. And then apply ChapStick again. I rub it on my lips harder and harder."Are you okay, Kates?" Liz asks worriedly."I ine," I mumble as I continue to rub my lips with ointment. And that's when I realize what I'm trying to do--erase Dylan's kiss from my lips, as if that were possible. And even if it were, there would still be proof--in the People photos. I've got to call Austin and explain. He already thinks Dylan has a crush on me. He's going to freak out. I'm kissing Dylan and I'm not at work! What if the photos, like, show how into the kiss I was? For just a second, of course, but what if?What if Austin can tell I enjoyed that kiss?"K! Come on!" Sky insists and throws my wax lips at me. "Get back to work and start kissing!""Sorry!" I smile at the next payee apologetically. I pick up my wax lips and prepare to plant a kiss on the nervous-looking guy, but all I can think about is Austin.Saturday, June 13thNOTE TO SELF:Call Austin ASAP.MEETING OF THE MINDSSCENE 6In line in the cafeteria.JENNY:Amy! Amy! HELL-O? Amy!ANDIE:(turns around) Are you talking to me?JENNY:(impatiently) Yes!ANDIE:I'm Andie.JENNY:Whatever. Listen, Andie, whatever it was you were trying to say to my boyfriend back there, you can save your breath. Leo isn't interested.ANDIE:I didn't think he was, Jenny. This is more about me than it is him. I don't want to start the rest of my life having regrets. Sort of a carpe diem on my last day as a minor, you know?JENNY:Carpe what? Leo didn't even know you breathed the same air until today. Even if he did, you don't belong with our crowd and you know it.Don't embarrass yourself.ANDIE:(lowering her voice) You're the one who should be embarrassed. I saw you. Last weekend. With Thomas Lopez at the Bait Shack, and I don't think he's part of your crowd either. Unless you started accepting members from the Spanish Honor Society all of a sudden.JENNY:You... you... I would never hang out with Thomas Lopez. And if I were you, I wouldn't dare say another word about something you know nothing about. Got it? (gets bumped in the back) OW!JORDAN:Oops. Didn't realize I was standing so close to you. Hey! That shade of Jell-O looks really good against your orange tan.JENNY:(shrieking) It's Golden Summer! And you just got Jell-O all over my new shirt! I was going to wear this to Leo's graduation party.JORDAN:Guess you'll be wearing something else then, won't you?(Jenny stalks off and Jordan and Andie burst out laughing.)ANDIE:What was that about? I've never heard you open your mouth to their crowd before.JORDAN:Maybe you've inspired me. We do only have twenty-four hours left here, you know. How bad could Jenny make things for me?LEO:Andie?ANDIE:Leo! Hey.LEO:Do you have a minute?JORDAN:She actually has eleven till next period. (Andie nudges her.) I think I'll take my Jell-O to go.ANDIE:(smiling) I have eleven minutes.LEO:So I heard. Then maybe we should start talking. But first, this conversation is going to need ice cream. I'm getting the fudge pop. What can I get you? My treat.ANDIE:Okay. The strawberry fruit bar, please.LEO:You got it. (hands bar to Andie) So... you wanted to tell me something?ANDIE:Yes, and here it goes...SIX: It Ain't Over Till the Fat Lady Sings"Amy! Amy! HELLO? AMY!" Riley takes her cue and bounds out onstage in a violet tank top and khaki cargo shorts. Her tone is impatient with me, just like the one she uses in real life.My line! "Are you talking to me?" I ask, sounding confused. I'm wearing black Bermuda shorts and a fitted white Juicy tee that says "Juicy loves drama." We haven't worn costumes for rehearsal yet, not that our stage clothes are really binding. Riley wears a cheerleading uniform and I'm in jeans. "I'm Andie," I say and enunciate loudly the way my acting coach taught me.This is really fun. Acting on stage is just like rehearsals for Family Affair. We always ran through everything before shooting. Except on stage, your first take is your only take--when you've got an audience I mean. And I think I'm going to like that a lot. It's live and anything can happen.Riley shakes her head at me. "Kaitlin, I was supposed to say 'yes' before you said 'I'm Andie.' Remember?"She's right. I know she is. Just like she was right in the last scene when I accidentally cut out one of her lines by skipping her. "Sorry.""I know you are," Riley says patiently and fiddles with the tiny purple pearl earring in her right ear. "This is very different from cinema, I'm sure. If you trip me up, then I trip up Karen and she trips up Dylan and it's all rubbish. Do you see what I mean, lovely?"I shake my head, aware that the rest of the cast is watching me, including Karen, who plays Jordan. Everyone looks uncomfortable, as they usually do when Riley berates me. I just wish I knew if it's because she's being obnoxious or because I'm such a rube. Forest isn't here today. It's just the cast members. Whenever Forest's not in the house, I get more anxious around Riley because she tends to make a spectacle of the fact that I don't know theater the way she does."Now did you watch that video on stage direction on the American Theatre Wing website I told you to?" Riley questions. I nod again. "We don't want to have what happened yesterday, do we? When we queue up in the cafeteria, I'm behind you, not in front of you. Something like that can mess up the show's whole aesthetic.""Riley, come on now," Dylan tells her. He's wearing an outfit similar to his character, a black tee that shows off his fit upper torso, tight jeans that are torn at the knee, and black Converse. Running his hand through his dark, short hair, he looks tired of having to talk her down for the millionth time today. "Kaitlin is working her arse off. ""I know she is, Dylan." Riley crosses her arms over her chest and I notice the small ruby ring on the middle finger of her right hand. "Everything I tell her is for her own good. I don't want her going on stage opening night, messing up like she continually does, and feeling like a total wanker. She should shine!""You're right," I tell Riley, blushing, and ducking behind my hair a little. But why does she have to constantly bring up every little thing I do wrong?"Now let's try that again, shall we?" Riley claps her hands. She's somehow taken over Forest's role when he's not around. ("I do have the most experience, having been on stage since I was two.") "Let's take it from the next line."Riley rolls her shoulders back, shakes her head, and takes a deep breath. She even closes her eyes and I try not to snort. Yesterday she caught me laughing at her "mental preparation," as she calls it, and I got a ten-minute lecture on theater etiquette."Whatever," Riley drawls in a dead-on American accent. I have to admit, Riley is good. "Listen, Andie, whatever it was you were trying to say to my partner back there, you can save your breath. Leo...""Boyfriend," I interrupt and Riley just blinks. "You said 'partner.' Isn't it 'boyfriend'?" Everyone is looking at me. I look at Dylan. He tries not to smirk. Oh no. I probably shouldn't have done that."Bugger! Kaitlin's right," Riley smiles at me thinly. "It is boyfriend. We say partner in England, you know. It's so hard keeping track of two dialects, you have no idea." She walks across the quiet stage, her white sandals making clomping sounds. "You're so lucky all you've ever had to master is your own accent, Kaitlin. You'd have the hardest time trying to speak like a Brit.""Actually, I used a British accent in..." Dylan coughs and I shut up. I've learned his cues to navigate Riley's wrath. Right now, he's inconspicuously trying to signal me to close my mouth. Which I do. "You're right, Riley." I smile patiently trying to glue my lips shut to keep from screaming."You're lucky you have me, Kaitlin." Riley strides back my way and puts her arm around me, turning me slightly to face the others. "On the stage, there is no 'I,' only 'we.' We work together or we all fail. When I was in Gypsy--you've seen Gypsy, haven't you?"I don't look her in the eyes. "I haven't."Riley gasps and drops her bony arm as if I'm on fire. "Kaitlin, it's another classic. I saw Gypsy when I was just a wee one. It was the second play I saw after Jesus Christ Superstar."My voice is even smaller. "I haven't seen that either."Riley looks around at the others. Some actually look surprised too, I notice as I lift my eyes ever so slightly to peek at the others. Some just roll their eyes. "Can you imagine? These are staples every trained theater actor has seen! You should really see a local production, Kaitlin. It's so important to view others' works for your craft.""I just got tickets to see Rock of Ages for this week." I look at Riley hoping this will appease her. Instead she looks at me like I've just suggested she watch American Idol."Rock of Ages can't compare to Jesus Christ Superstar!" She's so shocked she's stuttering and she looks to the others for support, but no one gives her any. "That's like, that's like, comparing Gypsy to Mary Poppins!""I liked Mary Poppins." I'm beginning to realize I can't win. "I saw it the other night." I'm trying to see as many plays as I can before I start my own show."A Disney show!" she laughs. "Oh, Kaitlin, whatever will we do with you?" She looks at her shiny silver Movado watch. "Loo break! We'll reconvene in fifteen minutes."Karen and Riley head off to the bathroom and I collapse cross-legged on the dusty scuffed-up floor, knowing I'm dirtying my Rebecca Taylor shorts, but I couldn't care less. All I want to do is hear Austin's voice. I dial his number and wait patiently till I hear him pick up."Hi, you've reached Austin," I hear him say."Austin! Hey, it's me," I say quickly, excited to finally catch him. "I haven't talked to you in two days...""You know what to do at the beep," he says. "I'll call you back soon. Promise." BEEP.It's a message. A new message that I don't recognize, which is what confused me. "It's me." I can't help sounding glum. "Call me, okay? Miss you." I hang up and shove my phone into my overstuffed snakeskin bag. (I'm carting around a change of clothes for the meeting I have with Laney later.) Why did he change his message since yesterday?"Chin up, mate." Dylan joins me on the floor, not minding that his battered jeans are getting dirty too. He offers me half of his Cadbury bar, and I look around for Riley ("No more cupcakes, Kaitlin! Theater is about being dedicated to your body!") before I take it. He has them shipped over here from the UK because he swears the Cadbury sold in the States tastes different. "What's that saying you guys have? Riley's bark is worse than her bite?"I laugh. "That's it. I hope you're right."Dylan is sitting right next to me and our knees are touching. He smells a little like pineapple. Maybe it is CK One cologne. And even in just a faded Ed Hardy tee, I've been sneaking looks at him all rehearsal. His biceps peek through his tee. He must work out a lot."It's too bad Meeting of the Minds already opened." Dylan snaps me out of my thoughts. "You could really use the Gypsy Robe.""I read about the Gypsy Robe," I tell him excitedly. It was in one of the books I read about the Great White Way. HOLLYWOOD BROADWAY SECRET NUMBER SIX: The ritual of the Gypsy Robe occurs on the opening night of a Broadway musical right before the curtain goes up. The whole cast and members of the production get together on stage and form a circle. In the center is a performer who is supposed to be a representative of Actors' Equality and a former recipient of the ritual from the last musical that opened on Broadway. The performer holds a gorgeous decked-out robe that has memorabilia from past Broadway musicals all over it. The recipient of the robe is usually someone from the chorus who has performed in the most Broadway shows and embodies the qualities of the Broadway "gypsy"--someone who is dedicated, is professional, and has a seasoned career. The hope is that the robe brings luck and charm to the play's opening night."I don't think it would work here, though," I tell Dylan, tracing my pointer finger along the floor. "This isn't a musical, this is my first show, and I'm not in the chorus.""Bollocks, you're right," Dylan says with a laugh. He rests his head on his knee. "You don't need it anyway. Everyone likes you, and you're going to be brilliant on opening night.""You think?" I know I'm fishing for it, but this is the sort of reinforcement that I shamelessly know I need right now. I pluck at the fabric of my cotton shirt, fretting. I'm freaked out enough about being on stage without worrying how I'm going to sound. I was hoping Austin would say the same thing, but he's been out of reach the past few days. I know he's just busy with finals and getting ready for lacrosse camp, but I really feel how much I miss him."I know," Dylan tells me firmly. "Rehearsal is done in an hour, and I was going to take the tube uptown to get some lunch. You interested?""Yes," I tell Dylan regretfully, "but I have a meeting with my publicist. She's in town with another client who is doing the talk shows."Dylan smiles, knits his forehead, and looks down at the painted black stage. "Maybe tomorrow then," he suggests. "We can even stay after to go over a few more scenes if you like.""I could really use the help." I struggle to get up and Dylan offers me his hand. He pulls me up and I find myself looking into his green eyes again."Happy to," Dylan says and gives me the most amazing grin. Huh, look at that. He actually has two dimples, not one. It makes me blush, oddly, and I feel the heat move over my face."That would be great." I feel my iPhone vibrate, and I run for my bag. "Will you excuse me a second?" Dylan nods. "Hello?""Hey, stranger." Austin's voice growls in my ear."Hey!" I'm so excited I practically scream. "I mean hi. And you're the stranger. I haven't spoken to you in two days.""Well, it feels like a lot longer," Austin tells me. "But I'm really sorry, Burke. We had those two meets in San Diego and we wound up staying overnight and by the time I went to call you, I realized it was too late.""It's okay," I say. Did I even know about those two meets? I can't remember either way. Then again, I didn't tell him about the charity kissing booth, which I have to do now. Eek. "I just wanted to hear your voice.""Does it sound good?" Austin teases."Yes!" I laugh."So what is it you wanted to talk about?" he asks. "I'm all ears."Okay, here it goes. "Do you remember me telling you about that Operation Read America event I went to the other night?""Um... did you tell me you went to an Operation Read America event the other night?" Austin laughs. "Sorry. I can't remember."I'm a tinge annoyed. I did tell him and I talked about it for like an hour because it was at the Waverly Inn and I was really hoping to bump into Graydon Carter. But now is not the time to point that out. "That's okay. It was this event for charity and they had this kissing booth with the stars where people paid money to kiss celebrities."That gets his attention. "Go on.""And Sky and I were two of the kissers," I continue nervously. I can't think of a time I've ever been this nervous to talk to Austin, ever. "We wore wax lips and we kissed babies and it was all for a good cause." God, I sound like Laney. "Anyway, I just wanted you to know because you might see some pictures in the tabloids.""Huh." Austin sounds sort of quiet, but my phone is a little fuzzy. Oh wait, that's the air conditioner unit blowing backstage."And well, one of the people I kissed was..."Say it."... Dylan Koster. You know, my costar.""I know who he is." Austin's voice sounds strange, almost as if he is about to laugh. Or maybe cry."The pictures are probably online already and People will have some this week." I can't stop talking. "It was great publicity for the play and he was a really good sport. Oh, and I also kissed Chace Crawford and Jimmy Fallon.""How was Jimmy Fallon?" Austin asks."Funny," I squeak. "He wanted to kiss my elbow." Now it's my turn to let the dead air hang between us. "I've been trying to reach you for days so I could tell you. Are you mad?" I finally ask.Austin takes a while to answer me. I hear him sigh on the other end. "No." He sounds like he is choosing his words slowly. "I don't like it, but I know it's work. Sort of. I'm glad you told me though."I feel like I could exhale for a whole minute, I'm so relieved. "Of course. It was nothing, but I didn't want you to think it was something so I thought I should tell you about the nothing."Did that even make sense?"Glad you did." Austin still sounds off. Or maybe it's just me being paranoid.I've got to change the subject fast. "All ready for the dance?"That topic perks Austin right up. "Limo is booked, dinner reservations are made, and I've already picked up my tux.""My dress is already in L.A.," I tell him. "And Paul and Shelly are coming to the house to do my hair and makeup.""Sweet." I'm paying attention to every word Austin says to hear if he's still mad, but he sounds okay again. And I know he is when he says: "Burke, I can't wait to see you. Liz told Josh your flight gets in at three. Make sure you sleep on the plane okay?""I will," I promise. He's so sweet to worry about my beauty sleep. "I'll be well rested for the dance on Friday." I hear Riley on stage so I better go. Any second she's going to come looking for me. "I'll try you later, okay?"After we hang up, I feel a little better. At the same time, I'm a little sad. The only thing we got to talk about was the silly charity kissing booth. I didn't even ask him who won the meets in San Diego! I didn't get to tell him about Riley, or Mom driving me nuts about the Hamptons, or ask how his family was. That's what I'm thinking about during the last hour of rehearsal. Thankfully nobody notices my mood change. I'm still a little blue when we say our goodbyes and I head outside to the waiting town car.When I open the car door, I hear wailing that would rival any passing cop car siren. I look inside and see Nadine in the backseat with her arm around Sky. Her long black hair is sort of frizzy and her nose is all red and her skin is blotchy. Very unlike Sky, who never steps outside without at least concealer and bronzing powder. Even Rodney looks worried about her."What happened?" I ask.Nadine's face is grim. "Sky's show got the ax." That makes Sky cry harder. "I mean, it was put on hold. Indefinitely." Sky begins to hiccup. "She showed up at the apartment looking for you and insisted she come meet you here."I slide in next to Nadine and put my arm awkwardly around Sky. She pulls the shoulder of my tee and uses it as a tissue. I guess she can't risk getting anything on her one-of-a-kind Nicole Miller magneta silk sundress. (I know it's one of a kind because she tells me every time she wears it.) I let the my shirt-as-a-tissue thing slide. "Sky, I'm so sorry." I rub her back. "What happened?""Reporter..."--sniff--"... was... right!" Snort. "Grady is fighting with the network..."--snort--"about location, budgets, EVERYTHING! He threatened to pull the plug, so they..."--SOB--"... did it for him! We're off the schedule." She buries her head in my shoulder, sending snot all over my tank top. Eww."I don't know what to do," Sky continues, starting to get hysterical. She looks up at me with big, dark eyes, her chandelier earrings dangling as the car moves. "What do you do when your career is in free fall?""I don't know.""You must know. Yours has been in free fall for a while!" Sky snaps.I look at Nadine. She's trying not to laugh."If you're going to get snippy then you can cry to someone else." I sound sterner than I intended and Sky starts to sob again."I'm sorry, K." Sky takes a compact from her small Gucci clutch and examines her face. She grabs a tissue from the box Nadine is now holding. I guess Nadine doesn't want her cute multi-print Gap boho top becoming a tissue either. "I'm just mad and you're the only person I could think of who would actually listen to me. You're too nice to say no." Nadine hands her another tissue."Call Laney and ask her if we can reschedule," I instruct Nadine, then turn to the driver in the front of the black town car. "We need to go to the Upper West Side. The Shake Shack.""Yes!" Rodney exclaims. "I've been dying to go there."Sky pops up again. "What the heck is the Shake Shack? I'm in no mood to take some weird Zumba dance class, K!""It's a burger and milk shake place, Sky." Nadine tucks a lock of Sky's black hair back behind her ear."They say it's out of this world," I add. "Come on, it will cheer you up."Sky buries her head back in my chest. I take that as a yes. I pat Sky's shoulder gently, wondering how my life got so weird.Forty minutes later (It's a long wait!), Sky and I are deep into vitamin creamsicle shakes, made with frozen custard and ice cream, and the fattest burgers you've ever seen. We both got sides of fries, of course. Sky demanded Rodney stand guard outside the corner shop's door so that the paparazzi can't capture her eating "a gazillion calories in one sitting." Nadine offered to stand outside and eat with him--anything to avoid hearing Sky cry some more. Thankfully, Sky appears a little calmer now and the color has returned to her cheeks. She sucks hard on the straw of her shake, and her pink lipstick leaves a mark on the straw."I told you food can fix anything." I dip another fry in my ketchup.Sky rolls her eyes and stares at the glass ceiling. "A shake does not fix my employment problem. But it does taste good. Thanks." She gets quiet and looks down at the table. Then she takes another bite of her burger. "I needed this.""You're welcome." I smile. "You're going to be fine. You'll get another gig before the week's out.""Not on TV. " Sky's voice cracks. "The fall schedule is set, and for the first time in over a decade I won't be on it.""You've got SNL coming up," I remind her. "That will be huge for both of us. And then maybe you'll do a movie for the fall. You're always going on and on about all the offers you have coming in. Pick one.""True." Sky moves the fries around her plate with a long fuchsia fingernail. "But it's not the same thing and you know it, K." She looks at me. "I miss FA." Her eyes begin to well up.Now my eyes start to tear too. "Same here," I say hoarsely, digging my fingers into the bottom of the green bench I'm sitting on."I miss being part of a show that I loved--even if I pretended not to some of the time." Sky is on a roll. "I didn't realize how much I'd miss it, you know? Until it was gone. And I'm not saying this to send you off the deep end again, but I feel like the only one who could possibly understand any of this is, bizarrely enough, you. Does that make any sense?"I nod. "More than you know," I tell her. "Believe it or not, I even miss fighting with you. At least you were always up-front with your insults." I tell her about how badly Riley has been making me feel. Sky is pretty worked up about "the British tart," as she calls her, and says a bunch of other things I shouldn't repeat. Still, hearing Sky say I'm being too hard on myself about being a first-time stage star makes me feel better.I raise my milk shake."What are you doing?" Sky asks, suddenly alarmed. She fumbles for her Burberry shades and puts them on to avoid being noticed."Toasting us.""With milk shakes?" she says, flabbergasted."Go with it, Sky." I arch my eyebrow (they look great now that I've had them shaped at Eliza Petrescu, aka the queen of the arch). I raise my paper cup higher. Sky does the same, even though she has a puss on her face. "To us finding something that makes our future as bright as our past.""Nice, K," Sky mocks me."It was on the back of my fortune cookie wrapper at Shun Lee Palace last night," I say. "But it's true. I hope we both find the next FA of our lives--whether it's TV, movies, Broadway, or none of the above. But I hope, maybe, as we're looking for those things," I say tentatively, "we can do it together." I almost cringe, waiting for Sky to make some sort of witty jab at me. But instead she sort of smiles."It's a deal," she says. And then we clink on it.Wednesday, June 17NOTE TO SELF:Pack 4 L.A.Have Nadine ck. w/Paul/Shelly about hair/makeup time.Fri. Flight 2 L.A. 11:55 AM, JFK Airport.Prom pickup Friday @ 6 PM.**SNL week starts--Monday @ 10AM!celebrity insider onlinehome news photos sound bitesPSSST... Everything you're not supposed to know about Tinseltown's Faves! by Nicki NuroWill Kaitlin Burke Sink Her Broadway Show?She wowed us on Family Affair, smoked the big screen in Pretty Young Assassins and is known by fellow stars as one of the sweetest actresses there is today. Is there anything Kaitlin Burke can't do?Maybe Broadway.Sources close to the Meeting of the Minds production are worried that Kaitlin's first part on the Great White Way may be her last. While Kaitlin is working hard at rehearsals and is wonderful with both the cast and the crew (she recently delivered pizza for the entire cast after they finished a rehearsal), some say she just doesn't have what it takes to do live theater."She has no clue how to take direction or connect with a live audience, and her stage presence is way off," says one. "If she doesn't improve, I fear the show may end its run early. There is no way people will pay to see Kaitlin butcher the role that Meg Valentine made famous."Could celebrity be getting in the way of Kaitlin's work ethic? Since moving to New York, Kaitlin has been on the scene a lot. She recently attended an Operation Read America event at the Waverly Inn, has taken in several plays like Wicked and Mary Poppins, and has been seen on the town with costar Dylan Koster (see picture at right of Kaitlin and Dylan's kiss at the Operation Read America event). "Kaitlin is lovely," Dylan said when he was reached for comment. "And she's going to be brilliant in the show."Biased opinion? Guess we'll just have to wait and see for ourselves.SEVEN: It's Good to Be Home (Even if It's for Less than 48 Hours)The hot, gooey cheese drips off my slice of pizza, and splashes of oil drip onto my vintage Star Wars tee. Oops! Thank God for Shout wipes."Ugh! Watch that grease," says Paul, my former FA hairdresser. "I don't want any oily fingers ruining my masterpiece. How do you eat that stuff and stay so thin anyway? If I even look at fried dough my stomach poofs up and Jacques reminds me of my unused gym membership." He pats his taut midsection, which is in direct proportion to his well-toned tanned arms and long legs.I giggle. "I highly doubt your stomach bloats after one slice."Liz is sitting next to me in her melon C&C California V-neck hoodie finishing her own slice, and she agrees wholeheartedly. "Even if it did, this slice would be worth the extra twenty minutes on the elliptical trainer."I stare at my slice lovingly. Nadine ordered takeout from Liz's and my favorite pizza place in Los Angeles, A Slice of Heaven, so that we had something to nosh on while we got ready at my house. We were starving after the almost six-hour plane ride. We got our usual--a Sicilian pie with extra cheese, peppers, and broccoli, and large Sprites. I've already had two slices and am starting on my third. With the Food Police (Mom) back in New York, I can eat what I want without hearing the words "fittings," "photos," or "cellulite."HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER SEVEN: People always want to know how it's possible for celebs to gain a few pounds when they have trainers, personal chefs, and money for any vegan/organic/gluten-free diet they want to try. My latest trainer, Olga Emegen, isn't afraid to tell the cold hard truth to anyone who asks: you can work celebrities to the bone, give them all the perfectly portioned packaged meals in the world, and tell them every workout and diet trick in the world, but you can't watch them 24/7. Even celebs have moments of weakness--like now--and Olga is not here to stop me from having this third slice of pizza. Or from gulping down that gooey chocolate chip cookie Dylan bought me the other day at rehearsal. She can't hold my hand--or rather slap it--every minute of the day. And celebs, just like everyone else in the world, are human. We have cravings too.I hear a small click and look up. Nadine has just taken a photo of me in mid-bite on her camera phone. She smiles at me mischievously before tucking the phone back into her faded Gap jeans. "I think I'm going to save this for future blackmailing purposes. If we don't like those SAT scores that are due any day, this picture will guarantee you go back and take them again.""Some chaperone you are," I mumble. I couldn't believe Mom and Dad let me fly back to Los Angeles with just Nadine and Rodney. Mom said I was old enough to do it, but I suspect the real reason neither of my parents accompanied me for the quick trip was that Mom's Darling Daisies committee has some charity dinner this weekend at the Time Warner Center. I've never seen her so excited to work on something for free before."I'm sure Kaitlin got a great score," Shelly boasts. She's my former TV makeup artist so she's a bit partial. She's doing Liz's makeup first while I get my hair done and Shelly is so short she has to use a step stool to reach her. She takes Liz's empty plate and hands it to our housekeeper, Anita. Then she starts Liz's makeup by dabbing a little under-eye concealer and applying loose powder as a base. "You need a stronger moisturizer. The L.A. sun is doing serious damage to your delicate skin." I try not to laugh. Shelly has always worried about my skin too. She's a mama bear-type, plush body and all. I'm glad Paul and Shelly were free to do our hair and makeup for the prom. They're both doing a ton of day shoots and are fielding offers to go on staff for some new fall shows."Kates was studying hard at the end for that test and I'm sure it paid off," Liz says as Shelly starts to sweep a purple shadow, the same shade as Liz's cashmere drawstring pants, over her lids. "I don't know what she worked on harder--fixing her image, spending time with Austin, or studying. I know Nadine would like us to think it was studying.""I did all three." I resist the urge to wipe my greasy fingers on my brown Torn stretch terry pants and instead look in the mirror that Paul has placed on the kitchen island. Thank God Mom isn't here to see the mess we've got going on. Anita, our housekeeper, who has had more than one run-in with Mom, promised to have everything back in order before she flies back in two weeks for her standing date with Botox. (Shhh!) "Sometimes I do have my act together."Just being back in Los Angeles makes me feel more in control. I know it sounds odd, but I breathe better here (which is strange considering all the smog). Maybe it's all the hills and the grass and the palm trees or the luxury of having a pool in my backyard (something I sorely miss in New York). One thing I don't like so much is how isolated Los Angeles can make you feel. In New York, you can meet a new person every ten seconds. In L.A., the only way you talk to strangers is if your car overheats on the freeway during rush hour traffic and someone rolls down their car window to talk to you. Which is to say, you don't.Paul begins to pull strands of my honey blond hair into a twist and then back into a loose bun. We're going for my friend Taylor Swift's look. The dress I picked is just as ethereal. I went with this fitted ivory strapless Diane von Furstenberg dress that has a mermaid tail. There is a ruffle accent that trails from the top of the dress all the way to the bottom. It's simple but, I hope, elegant. Liz, as she is Liz, went with something flashier. She's rocking a glittery gold Betsey Johnson strapless knee-length gown. The bottom is made of tulle. Liz calls it her fairy godmother look."I miss seeing you guys every day." I watch Paul. "It's just not the same.""We miss you too, darling." Paul sticks a pin in my hair. "There is one upside to the show ending. You don't have to deal with Sky anymore." He makes a face. "That princess has pulled some royal flushes over the years, hasn't she?""She's not so bad." I stare at my hands. I got a French manicure last night. "She's mellowed." Everyone stops what they're doing and stares at me. "I'm serious! Come on, guys. You know she was a real help with the Alexis thing. And she defended me after my meltdown this spring. She's sort of changed." Liz laughs. "Okay, maybe not changed. She's still snippy, but she's not as bad. I sort of get her now."Liz rolls her eyes. "I think you're fooling yourself.""Maybe Kaitlin is right," Nadine agrees and grabs a slice of pizza from the box. Thank God Nadine ordered several pies. Rodney makes a grunting sound behind her, and without looking she hands the piece back to him and grabs another for herself. "I felt a little bad for her the other day.""Bad for Sky? What's wrong with you guys?" Liz practically jumps out of her chair she's so annoyed. Shelly tsks and puts a hand on Liz's black styling cape to keep her from getting lip liner all over her face. "Did you forget all the crap she's put Kates through over the years?""I know, but she was really beat up over her show being canceled." Nadine looks up from the copy of the New York Times she's reading while eating. "She actually had a milk shake, a burger, and fries and then broke into Kate's extra Sugar Sweet Sunshine cupcakes stash that Rodney hid in the car.""I thought we might need a late-afternoon snack," he explains, and looks a little embarrassed.Shelly smirks. "You're eating your way through New York's cupcakes as well, I see.""Shel, there are so many places better than Sprinkles," I inform her, tilting my head for Paul. "So far I've had Sugar Sweet Sunshine, Magnolia, and Crumbs. Someone said I have to try Butter Lane and Buttercup next, which I completely plan on doing.""Actually there is a box here from someplace called Buttercup." Nadine slips off her stool at the kitchen island and grabs something from the floor. "Anita handed it to me when we walked in." Nadine walks over with a large box addressed to me. "It was sent all the way from New York, and I know who sent it," she adds mischievously."Mom?" I wonder.Rodney's laugh is loud and it echoes through the large room. "Do you think your mom would send you cupcakes?""Sky?" I try again. "She wanted to check out Buttercup with me. We were talking about it the other day after my rehearsal.""Nope." Nadine shakes her head and her small green beaded earrings jingle. "You're going to die when you see who it is.""Sky won't give you room to breathe," Liz feels the need to tell me, even though she's busy having lip liner done."Love the SKAT nickname." Paul nudges me, and for some reason I think he means it. "LAVA is lame.""She's only hanging out with you because she has no job," Liz interrupts again. "You know that, Kates."I don't say anything. When Liz is on a roll like this, I have learned to let her go. Instead I motion to Anita for scissors. There is no name on the return address, so I have no clue who sent the package. I bust open the box and reach inside a dry ice-filled container to find a dozen perfectly wrapped cupcakes that are only slightly smushed. I have no clue how they made it to L.A. like this, but I'm happy to see them. I start passing them out. Rodney is the first to grab one. At the bottom of the box is a sealed notecard."You two are done being long-suffering costars." Liz is still talking as she reaches over to grab a pink-frosted cupcake. "I don't understand why she can't disappear like all costars do after they stop working together. Just pretend you're going to be chummy and then never return the person's calls. Is that so hard?" She stops for a second as Shelly finishes her face with a quick spray of glitter. Liz glides off the bar stool and begins tenderly eating her cupcake while Shelly stares at her in horror. She's going to need her lips redone for sure, which is fine because Paul has to finish my hair before he does Liz's. He's almost done--he's just adding a few little faux diamond hairpins in the back. "Instead of disappearing, Sky has practically followed you to New York and moved in," she says with her mouth full. Shelly watches as Liz ruins her lipgloss. "She hung out at our apartment all last weekend while I was in town and she goes ON and ON about herself. It's all I could do not to throw my new textbooks at her to knock her out so we could have a few minutes of peace and quiet!""Someone sounds a little jealous," Paul sings in my ear."I heard that!" Liz sounds steamed and she makes Anita, who is wiping down the counters, jump. "I am not jealous." She looks at me. "Kates, you know I'm not jealous.""I know," I tell her, avoiding the piercing stare Nadine is giving me."We just got through a jealousy thing with me and Mikayla, and I am not jealous," Liz tells everyone. "I cannot stand Sky Mackenzie. My problem is that I can't believe Kates would want to spend time with a girl who has made her life hell ever since I've known her.""We have to host SNL next week," I remind Liz while Paul pushes my head down for one last pin."And then you promise she'll be gone?" Liz tosses her wrapper in the stainless steel garbage pail. "She'll vacate her permanent spot on your couch and leave? Check out of the Soho Grand and torture Los Angeles again instead?" Shelly pulls Liz back over to her makeshift station and fixes her lipstick."I'm sure," I tell Liz, even though I'm not. I vaguely recall one of Sky's crying sessions where she mentioned New York summers being good for her psyche. I felt too bad for her to suggest her psyche try Florida instead."Next!" Shelly says as she releases Liz and Paul frees me up to go to Shelly's chair. I glance at my hair in the mirror. It's so soft and romantic. I don't know how Paul gets it to stay up and look so effortless at the same time.I rip open the notecard and see a handwritten message inside.Thought you might like a little bit of New York while you were back in Los Angeles. I knew you wanted to try this place. Next pick is on me--you promised to try fish and chips. (Remember your British slang: chips are French fries and crisps are potato chips.) Have a great holiday and try not to worry about the theater. You're brilliant as Andie and I won't stop saying it till I convince you so myself.Cheers, Dylan"They're from Dylan." I'm so surprised I can barely speak. I can't believe he mailed me cupcakes all the way from New York. That is so sweet."What is a Dylan and where can I get one?" Paul sounds intrigued."He's Kate's absolutely gorgeous, incredibly nice love interest in Meeting of the Minds," Liz gushes. I give her a look. "What? He's not all of those things?""He is, but he's just a friend," I stress.A friend who sends sweets to me three thousand miles away. No biggie."I know that and you know that, but does Dylan know that?" Liz asks. "Because something tells me Dylan would like to be more.""Muh too," Shelly agrees as she licks white frosting off her second confection before starting on my makeup."He was so cute about sending you a care package, Kates, that I didn't want to say no," Nadine apologizes. "He knew you wanted to try Buttercup and he asked me for your home address so he could send you some. He said he was worried that you were going to stress all weekend about the show. He thought these might help.""They are quite good," I admit, and decide to move them up in my unofficial New York cupcake ranking."Are you going to save one for Austin?" Paul innocently bats his eyes. He's so bad. He's always trying to cause drama!"No." I frown for a moment, but can't for long because Shelly needs to put lip moisturizer on me. "Austin is already bent out of shape about Dylan as it is. This would drive him nuts.""Ooh! A love triangle." Paul is beginning to loop around Liz's dark curls with more flamboyance. "I only wish I were in New York with you to see how this plays out.""It's not a love triangle," I insist a tad huffily. Shelly tuts at me, fussing that frowning will ruin my foundation."Maybe we should talk about something else," Nadine steps in. "There are a few things I should tell you before I let you go off to the ball and forget to remind you about a curfew." She winks."The limo is paid till three AM." Rodney looks up from eyeing the last chocolate buttercream. "I spoke to the driver this morning and I'll be riding shotgun."Nadine reads off her BlackBerry. "It's the rest of the weekend I'm worried about. I know you're going to want to spend every waking moment with Austin till Sunday at ten AM when we leave, and I understand that, but I've been having a tough time pushing a few people off, especially since your mom keeps calling and reminding them you're here." She grabs her bible, the notebook that has all of my schedules and info in it. (Nadine has a BlackBerry, but she likes writing things by hand too.) "Seth is begging for an hour for coffee in the afternoon tomorrow. He has some scripts he wants to go over with you.""I promised Seth too." I shrug. "I already told Austin and he's going to come with me. That's fine."Nadine crosses it off her list. "Great, so that just leaves... Laney."The room collectively groans."She swears she just needs a half an hour," Nadine begs."You know that will never happen." I try to laugh, but it's hard when Shelly is applying bronzing powder. "When she was in New York two weeks ago, our half-hour coffee was a three-hour chatfest."" 'And then I told Angelina that the "it" spot to adopt children from is Darfur, and she said I was brilliant and why hadn't she thought of that before?' " Paul mimics."I know it's hard to rein her in, but she said there is something--and I quote--'absolutely crushingly important' that she needs to discuss with you." Nadine smiles. "She wouldn't say what it was.""Can't it wait till Sunday night? A conference call maybe?" I plead. "I have so little time with Austin and we really need to catch up. You know we have the hardest time finding time to talk on the phone.""It doesn't help that all boys are bad at phone conversations." Liz's head is down as Paul uses the curling iron to give her tiny curls by her neckline."All boys but me!" Paul tells her."Please, Nadine." I bat my eyes at her. "I'll see her when she's in town next.""Aww... Nadine, how can you refuse?" Shelly asks.Nadine sighs. "Fine. I'm going to hear about this, but I'll call and lie. Say you're doing meetings with Seth or something.""Watch what you say," I warn. "She can find out anything from anyone.""WHO CAN FIND OUT WHAT?"I nearly jump out of my skin. Anita, who was washing dishes, screams and picks up a soapy frying pan, spraying bubbles and water everywhere, but ready to hit the intruder, who is whipping around the corner into the room from the door next to her.The intruder stops short at Anita's cast iron weapon and screams. In less than two seconds she has her Mace out and is ready to mist the room. Thankfully Rodney grabs the can before she can strike."ARE YOU PEOPLE TRYING TO GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK?" Laney bellows, pulling her arm away from Rodney. "WHY ARE YOU ALL HERE?" She clutches her beige Chanel purse to her chest and takes big gulping breaths. Anita, realizing who it is, quickly says something in Spanish and then rushes to make Laney a cup of tea. Paul scurries over and fans Laney's face with a handheld mirror and strands of Laney's long straight hair begin to fly around."YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO FIX MY FLYAWAYS," Laney tells Paul, who stops immediately. "I JUST HAD MY HAIR BRAZILIAN STRAIGHTENED.""But your hair was already straight," Liz can't help reminding Laney. Laney glares at her."Laney, why are you yelling?" Nadine wants to know.Laney looks at her, ready to bark, and then reaches up and touches her ear. And then the other one. "Oh, sorry." She plucks the Bluetooth headsets out of each ear, exposing three-carat diamond studs underneath."You have two?" Paul sounds incredulous."I have two lines." Laney drops the Bluetooths in her purse. She sees me and smiles. "Kaitlin, there you are! When I didn't hear back from Nadine, I got worried your flight was delayed. It's not like Nadine not to call me back." She clicks her tongue and Nadine colors slightly. Laney's starting to pull herself back together, smoothing her ruffled sleeveless DKNY top and navy blue sailor-style pants."That's my fault, Laney," I apologize. "The phone has rung nonstop since we landed, and I made her turn her work line off."Laney looks from Nadine to me skeptically."But you found us, so what do you need?" I brighten, trying to pull her out of her cranky mood. "We can chat while Shelly does my makeup. I have the junior prom tonight.""Oh, that school thing, right." Laney waves a poppy-red manicured hand dismissively as she pulls up a chair so close its almost impossible for Shelly to get near enough to apply my mascara. "So we're all set for SNL, no? I have great news--TV Guide wants to shoot a cover on set of you and Sky for next week's issue. Fun, no? Entertainment Weekly and People all asked to do features as well. The SNL press girl says you two are getting more inquiries than Justin Timberlake did when he hosted last time.""Ou on't ay," I mumble as Shelly applies peach MAC lipgloss."Can I say yes to all?" Laney pulls out her BlackBerry. "I'll send Nadine a list. They'll work around your rehearsal schedule for both the play and the show. It's going to be a crazy week.""Ell e bout tt," I agree and then when my lips are free, "Well, I'm glad you found me so we could discuss these things. I'm sorry I don't have time to do lunch like you wanted. I am meeting with Seth, though.""Good, good." Laney nods absentmindedly.Uh-oh. "What is it?""There is something else," Laney admits, readjusting the ruffled collar of her blouse. "Something that we found out this morning. It's nothing major, but I know you're going to be upset, and your mother and I still worry about your fragile state and those panic attack things you used to get."I grab Laney's hand and squeeze. It feels funny to do that--to be the one that is kind of mothering rather than the one who is falling apart. "I'm fine. Lay it on me. What did Ava and Lauren do now? Dress up as Sky and me again? They are going to freak when they see what we have in store for them on SNL. I'm sure they're planning something good." I laugh, but Laney looks serious and pulls a printout from her bag."This came over the wire this morning," Laney says. "It was posted on Hollywood Insider.com."I grab the page and read it quickly. It's an article about me being on Broadway. An unnamed source says I'm not cut out for theater. I squirm slightly.Am I really that bad? I'm not that bad, am I? Forest would tell me. Dylan says I'm doing really well. The only one who still thinks I have a ways to go is Riley. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize she's probably the website's source."I've already contacted Liz's father about threatening to sue if they won't take the article down, but you should know the piece was picked up by TMZ, People.com, and Eonline.com too." I hand the page to Liz, and Nadine, Paul, and Shelly read it over her shoulders."You don't have to take things that far, Laney," I say even though I'm pretty glum about it. "I'm sure this is just the first of many stories like this. I'm not mad, just a little embarrassed.""Why?" Laney wants to know. Now that she knows I'm not going to hyperventilate, or pass out, she looks much calmer. Even her high cheekbones seem to have relaxed, if that were possible. "This is complete fluff. Don't let it get to you, sweetie. As I always tell Jennifer--bad press can be made good press if you use the attention to your advantage.""I know." I hedge a bit. "It's just...""It's just what?" Liz busts in, mad for me. "You're worried the source is right, aren't you?" I don't say anything. "Kates! You know, you make this easy for her, don't you?"Laney sighs and brushes her straight blond hair away from her eyes. "We really have to do something about your self-esteem issues.""My self-esteem is fine," I insist. "Everywhere but in theater. Riley keeps telling me I don't know what I'm doing," I blurt out. "It's hard not to feel a little green.""You were green when you did your first Disney Channel movie and what happened?" Laney works up steam. "You had huge ratings! Same goes for your film roles! You have to start somewhere and look where you're starting---Broadway. They don't hire you for a Broadway show if you can't perform.""You're right." I don't know if it is jet lag or what, but I'm suddenly too tired to discuss this. "Don't worry about the article, Laney. I'm fine. You can tell Mom that.""Good." Laney taps a long red nail on her BlackBerry decisively. "I'll call off the dogs." She slides her Burberry sunglasses back over her eyes and grabs her bag. "Enjoy your little dance! I'll see you in New York next weekend for SNL."I reach for the last cupcake and take a bite. Wow, these really are good. Who cares what some unnamed source says? Laney's right. I can do this. I'm working hard to get ready for Broadway. Tonight, all I want to think about is Austin.* * *Forgetting about Riley and her Great White Way pasty face (hee hee, I just came up with that one) is a lot easier when you have a mug as gorgeous as Austin's to gaze at. When he turned up with Josh at my house with the most glorious pink roses I've ever laid eyes on, I forgot about everything else and I flew into his arms so fast, I practically knocked him over (which might not have been the best idea considering the thorns on the rose stems. Thankfully Rodney stopped the cut on my arm from bleeding all over my dress). Austin was wearing a tux, of course, with a bow tie, and his hair was lightly combed back 40s-style, leaving his forehead kissably free. Even his soapy scent smelled better than I remembered it. We must have kissed for ten minutes before Liz tugged on my arm and told me we had to take pictures and get in the limo or we'd be late to pick up Rob Murray, Allison, Beth, and her date."You look beautiful," Austin tells me for the millionth time as we walk hand in hand through the marble floored lobby of the Santa Rosita Sheraton Hotel where the junior prom is being held. There are mirrors everywhere and I can't help check us out as we walk by. We look so cute together. "I still can't believe you're here. I mean, seeing you, it feels like you never left, but you did.""I was thinking the same thing." I look at my pink Christian Louboutin shoes, feeling pleased, and then take another peek at his strong profile. Okay, so it's only been a few weeks since I've seen my boyfriend, but seeing Austin feels like slipping on my favorite Gap trench--comfy, gorgeous, and just perfect. Nothing's changed. I look down at our intertwined hands and smile. Okay, maybe I am holding on a little tighter than usual, but that's because I'm getting in as much contact as I can in my less than forty-eight hour trip."Next couple," a voice commands and the two of us stop what we're doing and look up. We're next for our junior prom photo. There are about a dozen pearlized blue and silver balloons and a teal crepe backdrop with the words SANTA ROSITA JUNIOR PROM written on it in metallic ink."Yes!" I can't help but blurt out and Austin looks at me curiously. "I've always wanted a prom picture." I feel a little bashful about it with all my professional shoots. "It's not like I'll ever have my own prom to go to. This could be my only one.""Don't forget the senior prom," Liz chimes in behind us. "You can get another couple photo with a bad background at that shindig too." Josh laughs."Make fun all you want, but I'm excited." I look at the package options and tell the photo guy, "We'll take D.""You really think you need an 8×10, two 5 × 7s, and eight wallets of you and Austin in formal attire next to art-class crepe paper?" Josh asks me."No offense, Burke, but aren't some of the red carpet shots we've gotten a better backdrop than this?" Austin looks at me."D." I'm being stubborn, but this is important to me. "Premieres are about my work life. This is about our life and this is the kind of picture I want to remember.""Aww, guys," Liz gushes, holding her hand to her heart. "That's so sweet.""D it is then," Austin pulls me over to the backdrop. He wraps my hands around his waist and then he wraps his hands around mine. We stand nose to nose. "Make that two Ds. We want two poses." He winks at me and the photographer gets ready to shoot.CLICK.For once, I don't mind the flash at all.* * *After we've danced to "Love Story," "Say," and "The Climb," it's time to take a break from the dance floor. Austin grabs us two glasses of punch and we sit down at our table. Only Rob and Allison are sitting there and they're deep in conversation so I don't interrupt.Clark Hall went all out for the decorations. Allison and Beth were on the committee and they made sure the place felt less like a boring windowless conference room, and more like a tropical paradise. There are fake palm trees covered in little white lights dotting the corners of the room. Blue streamers cover the ceiling and the strings hang over the dance floor (Beth told me they were trying to go for that under-the-sea feel), hitting the tops of some of the guys' heads. There are grass leis covering the food and drink area and the DJ is wearing a coconut-covered hat while he spins. On every wall is a mural of the tropics from the classic setting sun on the sand to a look at the ocean floor complete with scuba divers. (Pictures of Principal P. and Mr. Hanson hang where the scuba faces should be, which is pretty funny.)Looking around the room, I see a lot of familiar faces: Austin's teammates, Allison's and Beth's friends, even my enemies--Lori and Jess, who tortured me when I was enrolled here, smile huge and wave every time I turn their way. I manage a small smile, which takes a lot of effort."So tomorrow we're hiking up to the Hollywood sign, then having lunch at Slice of Heaven again, then we're meeting with Seth for coffee, swimming at my house, and going out to dinner in Santa Monica," I tell Austin."Is that all?" Austin replies with a wry grin.Being with Austin makes me feel like I never left. We have no trouble with conversation when we're together. It's the phone that is a major problem."Is that too much?" I twirl a heavily hair-sprayed lock innocently."Absolutely not," he says and offers me a bite of coconut cake. "You are going to love the hike to the Hollywood sign." Austin smiles, excited. "A bunch of us did it two weeks ago and the view was amazing.""I didn't know you hiked it already." I frown. Our plan was to do it together."Didn't I tell you?" Austin asks. "It was the day after the meet against Southside. If we won, Coach said we could have the next practice off and do the hike, remember?""No." I shake my head. I didn't even know he had the meet against Southside. The guys have been riled up about them all year. They're number one in their division. "Maybe I forgot," I lie. I would have been all over the Southside meet if I had known. Then again, it's not like Austin has asked me yet about play rehearsals. He knows how worked up I am about Riley and performing live. Doesn't he? I know I told him how anxious I am about doing a good job. At least I think he knows. "Between rehearsals, meetings, SNL stuff, and my quest to find the perfect cupcake, I'm beat.""I thought you were waiting for me to try some of the cupcake places," Austin points out. "I just read about one called Buttercup.""Never heard of it." I look at the packed dance floor. "I've only tried a handful of others. They're my sanity savers. That and Shake Shack."Austin groans. "Burke, we were supposed to go there together too."I'm surprised. I so don't remember that. "I'm sorry," I apologize. "I went with Sky the other day after she had this meltdown about her show getting axed.""How is team SKAT?" Austin's mouth twitches."You've heard the nickname too?" I marvel."Hayley told me," Austin admits. "I didn't realize you two were around each other enough to warrant a joint name." Austin keeps getting more and more surprised. "I thought she left after that charity kissing booth thing you did. You know, the one where you kissed Dylan." He gives me the strangest look.I blush. "She stayed in town. I told you.""I think I would have remembered you talking about Sky." The two of us stare at each other.I guess we haven't talked all that much since I've been away. It's not all my fault. I call all the time. I think about blaming the time change again, but I can't blame that for everything. Things feel tense for a moment, but I shake it off. "I guess we do have a lot of catching up to do." I smile. "We can do it this weekend.""Are you sure we'll have time with everything else you crammed in?" Austin jokes, although I'm still a little stung."Don't forget we're also viewing our favorite Clone Wars episodes," I remind him and he laughs. Yes, the series is technically a cartoon, but Austin and I both agree it is far superior to Star Wars: Episodes I, II, and III. The only thing that makes me sad when I watch them is how much I like Anakin. It's like in Wicked--I so don't want Elphaba to be the "bad" girl. I don't want Anakin to become Vader either."I've been TiVo'ing them for you." Austin livens up. "I even waited to watch the last three so I can't give anything away." Oops. Were we supposed to wait? I think I watched the last one with Matty. I'll keep that to myself too."So, Kates, are you going to come to Texas and see us play this summer?" Rob yells across the table."Absolutely." I grin, relieved for the interruption. "I hope you guys have some games on a Monday. I can't get off any other day of the week.""I'm sure we do." Rob combs a hand through his long brown hair. "We have about half a dozen games a week. Practices for six hours a day in that sticky Texas heat. Man, I don't know how we're going to do it all and still impress the scouts.""You'll manage." Austin gives him a huge smile and puts his wing tips up on an empty chair, going adorably boyish at the talk of camp. "This guy has more stamina than anyone.""Thank God you two are roommates," Allison says more to me than to the boys. "You can keep each other in check. I don't want either of you passing out on some muddy field from heat exhaustion.""Can that happen?" I worry."Nah, they have us practicing early and then very late in the afternoon," Austin promises. "During the heat of the day we're off. "Good. The last thing I want to think about is Austin being hurt and me not being able to get to him. He's always been able to get to me."The girls can't handle the fire so they have to go easier on us guys too," Rob says with a slight roll of his eyes, making Allison nudge him. "Sorry! But it's true. If it was an all-guys camp, they'd have us out there all day and night. Toughen us up. They're afraid the girls will faint.""I had no idea you were such a Neanderthal." Allison sounds more than a little annoyed, but I've zoned in on another detail."Girls?" I ask no one in particular. "Did you say 'girls'?""Yeah, Burke. It's a coed camp," Austin explains. "Didn't you know that?""No." I shake my head slowly. Ugh, I can't believe we're back to this."I know I told you," Austin insists, but he looks slightly confused. "Didn't I?""I think I would have remembered if you told me the camp was coed." I keep my voice light, but it's hard to keep the edge out. Austin definitely notices."Maybe it was during the same conversation that you told me you had kissed other guys at the charity event," Austin says smoothly. I notice Allison raise her eyebrows.God, does he have to keep bringing that up? It was a charity event! I glare at him."The camp is completely coed," Rob says, oblivious to the tension. "They've got coed dorms, coed eating areas, field trips. If I had known, I would have had us pick a different camp, man.""Do you have a problem with girls playing lacrosse, Murray?" Allison snaps.The two start to have a heated discussion, but I tune them out. "Coed dorms?" I exclaim. Are they crazy?"Burke," Austin says, softening a bit and grabbing for my hand. "This camp was the best one around. Coach picked it for us because scouts attend it more than any of the others in the area. Some of these guys have gotten scholarship offers right there on the field. It's a great opportunity.""I know." I sigh, even though all I can do now is picture girls swarming to Austin's room. How could they not? Look at him! And I'm going to be hundreds of miles away. No, thousands! I think."SPARE ME!" I hear Allison's voice rise over the music, interrupting us both. She throws back her chair and stomps off."Al! Allie, wait!" Rob begs and hurries off after her.Whoa. I do not want our night to end like that. I have too little time here to get into an argument over this. And besides, Austin's right. He trusts me, I trust him. Everything will be fine. There are girls here at school and I've never worried about that. I'm being paranoid because we're so far apart, and that's silly because it's not like Austin is worried with me being in New York. I can be big here. "I'm sorry about the kissing booth," I tell him gently."And I'm sorry I didn't tell you the camp was coed--even though I swear I did." Austin puts his arm around me and pulls me close. I can feel his heart beating. "Not that it matters, Burke." He touches my chin. "You know I only have eyes for you.""Same here," I agree, and we kiss. Again."You'll see how fast the time goes," Austin says when we finally pull apart. "I'll be in New York in two weeks for your premiere and then you'll get to Texas to see me and before you know it, we'll both be home.""You're right. It's only a few... months." I gulp. Geez. We still have two months to go. This separation feels too long already."Exactly," Austin says cheerily. "Ready to get back out there?" he asks as we hear Ne-Yo pump through the loudspeaker. I nod and then he takes my hand and spins me back onto the dance floor.Friday, June 19NOTE TO SELF:Have Nadine ck A's lacrosse camp enrollment. How many girls??!!Meet A at 9:15 AM.Seth at 2:30 PM.Flight back to NYC: Sun. 10AM.Mtg. @ SNL: Mon. 3 PM.KAITLIN'S SCHEDULE--Week of June 15thFUTUREPREZ: Kates, UR schedule is PACKED this week so I've put together this itinerary. Print a few copies--1 4 car, 1 4 dressing room, 1 4 home. I will have extras. Driver has copy 4 addresses. Hope it helps!--NMONDAY:10 AM--Rehearsal for play3 PM--Meeting for SNL. 17th Floor, 30 Rockefeller Center, Lorne Michaels's office. Discuss your thoughts for the show and any skit ideas5 PM--Your mom's charity dinner at the Brooklyn Botanic Garden (I know, I know, you don't want to go. I don't think you have a choice!) Private event so give your name at the gate.***NOTE: Liz is officially an NYC girl now. She'll be unpacking all day, but she wants to meet up for dinner. Place TBA. She'll call you.TUESDAY:10 AM--Rehearsal for play2 PM--Photo shoot for play coverage3:30 PM--Interview with Dylan and Riley for Seventeen5 PM--Fittings for SNL followed by photo shoot for SNL.WEDNESDAY:10 AM--Rehearsal for play2 PM--SNL weekly read-through (Audition for skit ideas that were greenlit on Monday. Warning: meeting could last up to three and a half hours. You will then meet with the writers and the producers to discuss which skits will be used going forward.)THURSDAY:9AM--EARLY! Rehearsal for play1 PM--SNL rehearsal for larger skits followed by shooting promos (approx. 2 to 4) to air for SNL prior to recording. (LONG REHEARSAL)9:45 PM--Interview with Playbill for Meeting of the Minds followed by interviews with People, Entertainment Weekly, and Teen Vogue (that interview will be done with Sky for SNL).FRIDAY:10 AM--Rehearsal for play2 PM--SNL Blocking--aka where you'll be standing, etc., in each skit followed by more rehearsal7 PM--Photo shoot for Teen Vogue with Sky (*Time could change if your rehearsal runs long for SNL)SATURDAY:10 AM--SNL run-through4 PM--Arrive back at SNL for final prep, last costume fittings7:45 PM--Dress Rehearsal for SNL, Studio 8H, followed by brief meeting with Lorne Michaels to see final skit run-through11:35 PM--Live Show2 AM--SNL after-party. McCormick & Schmick's Seafood Restaurant.SUNDAY:Rest! Yay!EIGHT: Live from New York, It's Saturday Night!SKY'S CELL: K!!!!!! Where R U??????????KAITLIN to SKY'S CELL: In a fitting. WHY????SKY'S CELL: Spoke 2 PR. Thought it would be cool 2 tweet during the live SNL broadcast tonite. What do U think?KAITLIN to SKY'S CELL: We have like 2.5 secs 2 change hair/costume/makeup. How R U going 2 do that?SKY'S CELL: Trust me. I can.LIZ'S CELL: Kates, I M on my way! How R U holding up?KAITLIN to LIZ'S CELL: Good! Thx. How did project go?SKY'S CELL: Getting coffee. Need?KAITLIN to SKY'S CELL: Yes, please, double shot of espresso.LIZ'S CELL: GROAN! So tough. Spent 4 hrs. in Washington Sq Pk trying 2 get perfect 1-min. footage of pigeons being pigeons. SO WEIRD.KAITLIN to LIZ'S CELL: I'm sure URs will be GR8!AUSTIN'S CELL: Hey you. Just touched down. Ready 4 2nite?KAITLIN to AUSTIN'S CELL: HEY!!! There U R! Tried U all morning, last night too. Glad U R on the ground. Getting ready. Nervous. Excited.SKY'S CELL: Got U X-LG coffee. 2 shots espresso. Will pass 2 Rodney.MOM'S CELL: Kate-Kate, Matty wants 2 come backstage. How do we do that?KAITLIN to MOM'S CELL: Send him 2 security. Ask 4 Rodney.AUSTIN'S CELL: Sorry. So busy. Last minute stuff. Crazy week. Sorry didn't check on U more. U will rock.KAITLIN to AUSTIN'S CELL: Yeah, busy week 4 me 2. Real busy! Still tried 2 call U...AUSTIN'S CELL: I left U 2 messages 2...KAITLIN to AUSTIN'S CELL: Sorry. Just stressed. Miss you, that's all.AUSTIN'S CELL: Miss you 2.DAD'S CELL: Kaitlin, this is Dad. Mom upset. Security won't let Matty through. Can you come out and talk to them? I'm sure you're busy, but Mom is worried that she is being, and I quote, "disrespected in a way a host's mother should not be disrespected." I'm not sure what to END MESSAGELIZ'S CELL: And Suz, this girl in class, was there doing it at the same time and I was so nervous we would have the same footage.AUSTIN'S CELL: Miss U 2. Will talk 2 U before U go on.LIZ'S CELL: U'd think they'd give us all different assignments? No?MOM'S CELL: SO RUDE! Security said to wait outside. I said, "Do you treat Justin Timberlake's mom this way?!" Tried to stop Andy Samberg, but he looked at me like I was crazy! I don't like his attitude, Kaitlin. I hope you're not doing a skit with him.DAD'S CELL: Dad again. Sent last message too early. Mom is getting a little wild. Waving her arms madly, upset. Can you come out here? PLEASE.MATTY'S CELL: K, need 2 get backstage!!! MOM IS EMBARRASSING ME! SAVE ME!SKY'S CELL: K, don't like wig 4 skittles #. Come down here so we can change it.LIZ'S CELL: I would have done cockroaches if I could, U know?AUSTIN'S CELL: UR hard to reach so in case I don't talk to U later, Love U. Knock them dead.KAITLIN to SKY'S CELL: Love U 2!! Thx 4 being here 4 me.KAITLIN to AUSTIN'S CELL, LIZ'S CELL, MOM'S CELL, MATTY'S CELL: NO WAY!!!! I WON'T CHANGE AGAIN. U R 2 MUCH! STOP WORRYING ABOUT THIS STUFF!KAITLIN to ALL: Oops. Sorry. Crazy message meant 4 Sky. All others ignore. 2 much texting @ once."What was that message about?" Sky yells as she barrels into my fitting 2.3 seconds later. She looks ridiculous--which is what we're going for--in an oversized Skittles bag with just her long legs sticking out. Her hair is classic Ava in a big, blond bouncy curls way. She taps her yellow tights and black tap-shoed foot in aggravation. "You love me? Um, eww!"I burst out laughing. "I'm sorry. It's just I've never been screamed at by a monster-size bag of candy before." Clara, the seamstress crouched at my feet who is finishing my own Skittles costume, can't help but giggle."Do you think you look any better over there?" A small smile escapes Sky's lips despite the obviously annoyed tone of her voice. When she walks over and her cellophane wrapper crinkles as she moves, I lose it completely. Tears are running down my face. "Stop! You'll ruin your makeup!" Sky barks."Sorry." I wipe my eyes. "You just look so funny. You are the last person I ever thought I would see looking like this." Sky crosses her arms. Or at least tries to, but her costume is too bulky for her to reach the whole way. "Okay, I'll stop. But as for your original question, no, I don't love you. That text was meant for Austin.""That's a relief. " Sky gives me a strange look. "I mean, I know I'm awesome and you've been having a lot of fun with me in New York, but that's not the way I roll."I roll my eyes at her. "It was too much at once. Everyone was texting me, I got annoyed with Austin, and my mom was flipping out about not getting backstage. I freaked.""Your mom is taken care of. " Sky waves me off. "I saw her on my way over here and made them let Matty in. She was really grateful. Although I think your brother and father may have been more so, just to get her out of their hair." Sky plays with her wig, pulling strands slowly. "I did, however, maybe, just sort of, leave Liz out there and claim I didn't know her."Thankfully Clara has finished her work, because I dart forward with a sound like crumpled trash. It's going to be hard not to crack up every time I move in this costume. "Sky! Why did you have to do that?" I ask, annoyed, and she follows after me as I head down the hall, the two of us crinkling and crackling as we go."Because it's fun." Sky shrugs her hidden shoulders with a crumpling sound."Do you two have to torture each other?""She's the one who purposefully ordered me chicken and broccoli for dinner from Yummy Noodles last night when I distinctly said tofu and broccoli." Sky sniffs. "Do you have any idea what the meat could have done to my delicate digestive system?""Kaitlin?" Parker, one of the pages working on the show, comes running up to me. "I saw Liz outside and let her in early to go to her seat. She has tickets for the dress rehearsal and the live show, right?""Yes, thank you, Parker." I smile gratefully, and Sky sighs loud and deep."No prob." He falls in with us walking down the hall toward the stage. "You guys ready to run through this number one more time before dress rehearsal?""I have a wig issue," Sky starts, but I cut her off."We're ready." Parker must sense the tension because he takes his cue to head off ahead of us. "Your wig is fine," I say through clenched teeth."The hair and the costume together make me look poofy," Sky pouts and tries smoothing down the costume to shrink it. It doesn't work."That's the point," I remind her. "You're playing Ava, not yourself. Do you think I like my wig?" I point to the mega-teased dark brown wig I'm wearing that is supposed to make me look like Lauren."Yours is worse," Sky agrees happily.I sigh. "Let's go."Ten minutes later the two of us are singing and tap-dancing on stage in our giant Skittles costumes. A tiny, yappy Pomeranian--standing in for Ava's equally yappy dog, Calou--howls along on command next to us. The song is absolutely hysterical, if I do say so myself. The writers came up with this biting ditty that makes Lauren and Ava sound like total paparazzi-crazed airheads, which, well, they are. Our number is supposed to be a Skittles commercial that Lauren and Ava have signed on to do because they're cash-strapped now that their reality shows have bitten the dust. The funniest part about the bit is that Lauren and Ava don't realize that the song they're singing is not just about the candy, it's about themselves. At the last minute, legal made us change the name of the candy from Skittles to Skirtles to avoid any lawsuits from the candy company. I wouldn't want my product compared to Lauren and Ava either.At the end of the skit everyone on the soundstage actually gives us a huge round of applause, which only gets me more pumped up for tonight. I know I'm trying to be nice and calm and not be catty like they are, but I have to admit, it is fun to slip into the girls' barely worn shoes for a few minutes. And Sky kills as Ava. Afterward, we get ready to do our dress rehearsal in front of a live audience.HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER EIGHT: Saturday Night Live is actually taped in front of a dress rehearsal audience and then airs live in front of a different studio audience a few hours later. The dress rehearsal audience sort of serves as last-minute testers of each skit--if the number gets no laughs, or bombs, then it could be pulled entirely. Every number can get tweaked up till the last second on the show. On occasion, encore showings of an episode are different from the original broadcast that airs that night. If something goes majorly wrong during the live broadcast--a musical act goes off the deep end and does something censorable, a comic curses, or a number plays better in dress rehearsal--it may be replaced with the dress rehearsal version in later showings.For the most part, our sketches get a ton of laughs, especially one where we play our Family Affair characters as eighty-year-olds living in a celebrity assisted living center. The two of us think we're our characters, not ourselves. The one sketch that bombs and winds up getting dropped is a number where Sky and I play karaoke singers who perform at a fried chicken pizzeria (don't ask). Our digital short with Andy Samberg--possibly my favorite thing we've done all week--has Sky and me playing his dream girls. All in all, I'm feeling pretty good as I head off to grab something quick to eat in my dressing room with Liz and my family before we get ready for the live show. Then my phone vibrates with another text.DYLAN'S CELL: Hey, lovely. The bloke at the door will let me slip in before live show starts. Going to dash from our show. Good luck! UR going to nail the Skirtles number.KAITLIN'S CELL: Thanks 2 U! U ran play and SNL lines w/ me all week. How can I thank U?DYLAN'S CELL: Lunch tomorrow? My treat.KAITLIN'S CELL: You treated the other day! My turn. Least I can do 4 all UR help.DYLAN'S CELL: Don't mention it. C U later. I will be the bloke in the jumper. Heard the studio is cold. Don't want 2 freeze my arse off!"Who is that?" Sky asks, hearing me laugh. She peeks her head nosily over my shoulder as we keep walking down the hall. We've both changed out of our costumes and are in comfy C&C California drawstring pants and tees. I'm in a green tee and black pants; Sky is in a peach tee and tan pants. We both got the outfits at an L.A. gift suite. I can't remember which one. "Is that Dylan again?""So what?" I sound defensive. Why? "He was just checking up on me. I think it's nice." I wish my boyfriend would have found more time to do the same. I barely spoke to him all week even after we had the most amazing weekend in Los Angeles. Austin knows how much SNL means to me. Why is he acting so distant?"Dylan is into you," Sky clasps her hands and makes googly eyes at me."No, he's not!""He so is," Sky counters. "You've been practically joined at the hip all week in between rehearsals, which has been so annoying, by the way.""He knows I have a boyfriend." I'm getting flustered. I know she's right that we've spent a lot of time together."That doesn't stop everyone," Sky points out. "Some guys go after girls who are taken, you know. And who knows? Maybe you're sending him mixed signals.""I am not!" I tell her hotly."Are you sure you're not, because that kiss at the charity booth seemed sort of hot." Sky is actually wagging a finger at me now. "Plus you get this goofy smile on your face every time you talk about him.""That's just because he's been such a good friend." He has! Dylan's got the play to worry about and yet he's spending all his free time making sure I'm not too overwhelmed. He even brought me lunch at my SNL rehearsal yesterday because he knew I didn't eat at the play rehearsal. He remembers every little detail I tell him, from what show I watched on TV the night before to what book I'm trying to read during my car rides (the latest Jodi Picoult. So sad).Sky won't let up. "I think you feel something for him.""I don't feel anything," I protest. I try walking ahead of her, but she reaches my dressing room at the same time as me."Look, K, I've been in a lot of relationships..."I interrupt her. "Really? I haven't noticed," I snap."And one thing I know is when people are into each other," Sky says, looking at herself in a mirror and primping her long, black hair. "You've got a thing for Dylan whether you're with Austin or not. That's what this all boils down to--Dylan is here and is giving you the attention you crave, and Austin's far away and is barely picking up the phone. It's not your fault. It was bound to happen. I'm sure Austin will be the same way when he goes to camp and..." A catering person walks by with a tray of goodies. "Oh look! Brownies! See you in a few, K!"I'm left standing in the hall feeling anxious and worried.DYLAN'S CELL: Are you going to the after-party? Want some company?I stare at my iPhone in alarm. Dylan's just being friendly, right? I thought that's what we were. Friends. But is Sky right? Am I sending Dylan the wrong signals? Why would I do that? I'll ignore his text for the moment and worry about the after-party later. I can't get myself worked up before the show. Everything's been going so smoothly up until now, even with my crazy week. I survived Mom's charity event and a ton of photo shoots and interviews, and made it through double rehearsals every day. Even Riley didn't bother me too much, probably because I was too tired to get upset about her nitpicking. ("Forest, didn't you tell Kaitlin to stand six feet from the desk, not eight?") I can't worry about what Dylan is or isn't feeling. Instead I call my boyfriend. He picks up on the first ring, but I can barely hear him because there is so much commotion in the background. Loud music is playing and people are laughing and talking."Burke? Can you hear me?" Austin yells over the noise. "Let me find somewhere quieter to talk." Two seconds later, I hear a door shut and the noise is more muffled. "That's better. Hey, are you still there? Listen, sorry about before.""I'm sorry too." Hearing his voice makes me feel instantly calmer. We seem to be saying "I'm sorry" a lot since we've been apart. "I'm sorry I forgot to call. Sorry I didn't tell you. Sorry, sorry, sorry.""Where are you?" I ask. "Are you at a party?""Sort of, " Austin admits. "Most people moved in earlier this weekend and tonight they're having a get-to-know-your-roomies bash in the common area. The dorms here are pretty nice. People seem cool too. The best part: Murray and I have our own bathroom, so we're pretty stoked.""I would be too." I try to picture what Austin's new home away from home looks like, but I can't. I realize I never even asked to see the camp brochure he kept mentioning to me. I will have to Google it later."So it's got to be almost time for you to go on," Austin continues. "Mom is taping it for me. She was worried the camp wouldn't have a TV set up yet, but there is one. It's just, um, overrun at the moment, but I spoke to my RAs and they're letting me use the one in their room, so I'll be cheering you on live, even though you can't hear it.""Thanks." I'm touched. "Knowing you're watching will keep me on my game.""You're on your game even if I'm not watching," Austin tells me. "Liz texted me to say you killed at the dress rehearsal. Especially your Skirtles number. I can't wait to see it.""Hey, you even got the new name of the candy right," I point out. I check my watch. I haven't made it to dinner with everyone and there is still so much I want to go over before the live show. I don't know whether I'll have time. "You do pay attention.""Always, when it concerns you," he says, and I grin."Kaitlin?" It's Parker again. I cover the phone and nod at him. "We need you on set for a moment to check lighting again.""Sure. I'll be there in a second." I take my hand off the microphone and go back to Austin. "I've got to go.""AUSTIN! COME ON!" A chorus of male and female voices shouts, and I hold the phone away from my ear to keep from going deaf."I'm on with my girl, guys," I hear him say. "I'll be a sec."Aww... his girl. And he said that in front of other girls! "You've got to go too," I tell him. "Call me after if you're up, otherwise I'll call you in the morning.""Knock 'em dead, Burke.""Thanks." I smile. "I will."The next forty-five minutes before the show are a blur of final checks, costume stuff, and last-minute notes. Before I know it, Sky and I are standing backstage while the opening skit--a political number that we aren't in--plays out. I look over my outfit one last time. My hair is down and I'm wearing a lilac Laundry by Shelli Segal satin pleated dress with Prada peep-toe heels. Sky has on a BCBG smoke sateen bead-detailed mini dress. Her long hair is pulled back in a ponytail. I'm obsessed with her black Miu Miu slingbacks with the tiny bows on the top.Then it's our cue and we walk next to each other through the doors and down the steps and stand in front of the applauding audience. Even though the lights are blinding, I can see Liz and my parents, Nadine, Rodney, Matty, and, in the back corner, Dylan. I try not to get distracted and just remember my lines."You might recognize Kaitlin and me from our show, Family Affair," Sky begins, getting a ton of applause at the mention of FA.I take a breath before my first line. "Or you don't recognize us from the show, but you know us from your favorite gossip tabloid," I tell them. "Which is why we're here. To set the record straight. You see, we don't really hate each other." A few people chuckle."Absolutely not." Sky shakes her head emphatically. "Total falsehood. We're like sisters."I frown slightly. "Sisters who occasionally fight," I clarify, looking directly at the audience. "But still, you can't believe everything you hear.""Even if it sounds sort of true," Sky adds. "Like that story about Kaitlin being hospitalized." I stare at her in mock horror. "It was true, but not because she was suffering from exhaustion." Sky puts a hand over the side of her mouth that I can see and whispers the word "lipo." People laugh. They're getting it! And they seem to like it!I put my hands on my hips. "Exactly," I say. "Some stories are exaggerations, like the ones about Sky being a total control freak." I cover my hand over my mouth now. "SO TRUE," I stage whisper. "AND SO IS THE STORY ABOUT SKY COLORING HER HAIR. SHE HAS GRAYS."After a few more barbs, the two of us start clawing at each other, pulling off pieces of each other's clothing that are meant to rip on cue. Finally Andy Samberg and Seth Meyers come out and pull us off each other. I'm dangling in Andy's arms, my legs flailing, while Seth holds back Sky. When they remind us about the cameras, we calm down and compose ourselves--sort of. We're still bickering as they go to the commercial break, and the audience loves it. And I love doing it! Who knew saying things to Sky that I've always said could play so well for a crowd? But it works, and Sky and I, I guess after years of working together, know each other's rhythms and know exactly how to play each line and each expression.The whole show works that way and then it's time for our curtain call and the whole cast is onstage saying goodnight. But it doesn't feel like goodnight. If anything, I'm more awake at 1:30 AM than I've ever been. No wonder they do an after-party. When the show officially ends, I hug the cast members and pose for a few pictures with the audience while my family, Nadine, Liz, and Rodney wait patiently to congratulate me. I look up and notice Dylan is with them and he's holding a HUGE bouquet of gorgeous summer flowers like lavender and sunflowers. He's talking to my mother."Kaitlin! You were fabulous!" Mom gushes. I've never seen her so happy. "Brilliant! I just e-mailed Seth. This should do amazing things for your résumé," she adds in a whisper. "I'll get on him about that tomorrow morning, but just great! Wasn't she great?" she asks the group.They all murmur their agreement, including Dylan, who is staring at me, smiling."These are for you," he says shyly.Mom clutches her heart. "Isn't that sweet?""Thanks." I take the bouquet from him and breathe in the heavenly scent of lavender. Wow. "You didn't have to.""I wanted to," Dylan insists. His teeth are so white. Blindingly white. I don't think I noticed that before. "You were brilliant. Spot on. Didn't I tell you?""You did." I laugh. "What about the...?""Skirtles number?" he finishes my sentence. "You sorted it out. It was excellent!""Thanks." I feel weirdly shy all of a sudden. I feel my phone vibrate. It's Austin. "Excuse me a second. Hey," I say to Austin. "What did you think?""It was great!" Austin sounds so proud and I get all gooey. "Burke, you are a true comic. Who knew?" It sounds so loud where he is. "I saw almost all of it.""Almost all?" I frown."Yeah, they kept pulling me away. I can already tell dorm life means a total lack of privacy. I missed the Skirtles number, but I'm going to YouTube it as soon as it's up.""Oh." That was the one number I wanted him to see. He knew that. "Okay."If he can pick up on the disappointment in my voice, he doesn't say anything. "Have a great time at the after-party, okay?" Austin, sounds like he's rushing me off the phone. "I'll call you tomorrow." He's gone before I can even say goodbye."So to the after-party?" Dad interrupts. "We can come, right?""DAD," Matty groans. "Please don't." I giggle.
"Sweetie, I don't want to go to that." Mom sounds uneasy. "Let's head home. I have an early appointment with the Daisies. Nadine and Rodney will take the kids.""We won't be too late." Liz winks at me.Matty and I breathe a sigh of relief."Are you going too, Dylan?" Mom asks him."Can't leave the lady without an escort, can I, ma'am?" Dylan is looking at me intently."And I do need an escort," I joke, sounding much more excited than I intended to. Nadine looks at me oddly. So does Liz. "I mean, of course, he's coming. We're all going. One big happy group! Um, we're going to leave in a little while. Let me get changed and I'll meet you out here.""Great." Dylan smiles again, revealing those dimples. "I'll be waiting.""Super!" I say dumbly, a nervous grin plastered to my face. I head back to the dressing area to grab Sky and get my stuff, but all I can think about is this new mess I've somehow created.Geez, maybe Sky is right. I might have a teensy crush on Dylan. And Dylan might like me back.And if he does, what do I do about it?Saturday, June 20NOTE TO SELF:GO TO SLEEP! Stay there all day Sunday.TV TomeThe New Queens of Saturday Night--Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie!Week of June 22nd by TV Tome Critic Brayden WoodsIf you caught Saturday Night Live this past weekend--and many of you obviously did, since the ratings spiked 21 percent--you might have been surprised to find yourselves laughing along with and not at the week's hosts.After being both praised and reviled in the tabloids for years, teen TV queens Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie of Family Affair turned the tables on America by poking fun at themselves. From the moment their opening monologue started--a hilarious bit about the two who famously hate each other claiming they don't hate each other even as they were griping at one another--we knew we were in for a rare treat.The girls didn't disappoint in the ninety-minute show (if you count out a weak game show skit about airhead cheerleaders). They cleverly mocked their octogenarian selves in an FA nursing home skit, played obnoxious paparazzi in another, and proved they could sing in the best skit of the night, a Skirtles commercial in which they played their enemies, socialites Ava Hayden and Lauren Cobb.The SNL writers struck gold with that ditty, but they can't take all the credit. The idea stems from a blog Sky and Kaitlin wrote likening Ava and Lauren to Skittles candy--sweet but when you get too much of them, you feel sick. The foursome have been fighting via the media for a month now and it seems as if everyone has a side, with Team SKAT (which stands for Sky and Kaitlin) T-shirts popping up on teens from Times Square to the Grove.Lauren and Ava must have had a meltdown over that skit, since it captured their TV personas perfectly. Sky was brilliant as the notoriously paparazzi-obsessed Hayden, using hair flips to her full advantage. And while Kaitlin made a worthy Cobb, she sparkled even more in a skit where she played a 1950s B-movie queen heroine fleeing from an army of ants. The best parts of the show were when the pair were onscreen together, proving to this TV critic what so many of us already know--like each other or not, the two belong back on TV together. Television producers, hear my plea: cast Sky and Kaitlin on a sitcom before someone else snatches them up.MEETING OF THE MINDSSCENE 8:School courtyard. Basketball court is in the background. A few park benches line the stage.LEO:Andie, wait!ANDIE:(crying) You don't need to follow me, Leo. It was a stupid idea to begin with. I never should have told you.LEO:(catching up to Andie) Hey. It wasn't stupid. Actually, it was probably the first honest thing someone has ever said to me at this school. I've spent four years here and so much of it was bull. We're all so busy being a type that we don't know who we really are. You know who you are, Andie. I like that. I may not have seen it before today, but I like that.ANDIE:You do?LEO:I do. And I want to try something. If you'll let me.ANDIE:What is it?LEO:This.(Leo leans in very slowly and kisses Andie very softly at first. Andie responds by kissing Leo back and wrapping her arms around his neck.)NINE: The Calm Before the Storm"This is it, people!" Forest tells us. "I want to go over one last scene before we call it quits for the day. Kaitlin? Dylan? I think we need to give THE MOMENT one last go."THE MOMENT is exactly what moment you think it is, and even after rehearsing it for weeks, I still can't help getting all jumpy beforehand. My hands get clammy, my forehead sweats, and I feel like I'm going to pass out from nerves. Dylan walks across the stage toward me."Peppermint?" he offers. We had a full dress rehearsal yesterday and today we can wear our street clothes. Dylan's wearing a cool green polo shirt that brings out the color of his eyes even more (if that's possible) and frayed khaki cargo shorts.I cover my mouth and breathe into my hand "Does my breath smell?" I shuffle my feet uncomfortably. I have on cute plaid Coach ballet sneakers that go well with my hot pink Gap tee and my new super fit Lucky capri jeans.He laughs. "Your breath is like roses, darling, relax. These are for me. You want?"I shake my head. Someone is testing the lights and a bright one blinds me for a moment. Then the lights go dim--too dim--and I feel like I'm on a romantic date."Take it from the beginning of the scene, Kaitlin," Forest says, without looking up from his notes. He's sitting on a crate near the edge of the stage. Did it just get hot in here? All we need is for them to pipe in John Mayer, and I'm done for.I nod. Dylan and I both exit stage left and then I run back onstage and Dylan runs after me."Andie, wait!" Dylan uses his American accent. He even sounds charming as an American. How does he do it?I start to cry. "You don't need to follow me, Leo." I literally shake, my character is so upset. "It was a stupid idea to begin with. I never should have told you." I turn toward Dylan after he starts his little speech about honesty and then it's my turn again. I almost forget to say my line. I'm looking so deep into Dylan's eyes, trying to concentrate on Leo rather than think about how good Dylan looks, and I catch myself just in time to hear Dylan say "but I like that.""You do?" I ask Leo. I start snapping my pink beaded bracelet absentmindedly. Remember, Kaitlin. This is Leo, not Dylan talking. I feel my heart begin to speed up. The kiss is seconds away."I do," Dylan says softly. LEO. I mean Leo says softly! "And I want to try something. If you'll let me."My breath catches in my throat. "What is it?" I practically whisper."This," Dylan whispers back. He puts one hand on my back, pulls me forward and with the other hand on my chin he leans in and kisses me so lightly I barely feel it. I close my eyes and lean into the kiss, my lips melting into his. Dylan smells like peppermints, I think, and peppermints smell delicious. From far away, I hear "Excellent!""Amazing!" Forest says as I unwind my arms from Dylan's neck and step back. I feel sort of wobbly and Dylan actually grabs my arm to steady me. "You two are superb together. Such chemistry. Don't you think so, people?"I didn't even realize the rest of the cast was watching us. I was in a total zone, but there they are. They're standing offstage and they walk out toward us. A few people mumble their agreement.I can't look at Dylan. I feel guilty kissing him, which is weird because I never feel guilty kissing another actor. It's just work. And yet... there is something about kissing Dylan that doesn't feel like acting. What am I saying? I try to block the thought out of my mind and picture Austin.Since Forest is here for today's final rehearsal with me before I open, I kind of figured he'd say something to all of us before we leave. And he does. "I want to thank all of you for putting in so much time and effort the past few weeks," he says, smiling like my dad does when I do something particularly wonderful, like win a Teen Choice Award or tell him he can produce my next film. "I know it was a lot of hard work--having you all come down here on different days and times to work on things you've already perfected, but this was a time to make your work gel with someone else's and I think the results, as you can see, have really paid off." Forest walks to my side and puts an arm around me, throwing me his famously dimpled smile. "Kaitlin, I think you're ready.""You do?" I can't help but ask sort of nervously and sort of excitedly at the same time. Hearing Forest say that means a lot. I flush from embarrassment, knowing the others are looking at me. I pull down on my Gap V-neck nervously. "I mean, thank you. I owe it all to you guys." Dylan winks.It's Wednesday afternoon and we've just finished a full rehearsal from start to finish. Usually we work on select scenes or sometimes Forest has me come alone and go over dialogue with him. It's been a grueling process. More practice than I've ever had on film. With a movie, the bulk of my rehearsal is done on my own, sitting in a trailer memorizing my lines. Then we do several takes and shoot the scene for real. I know my character's motivation and purpose and who she is, but I've never known a character as well as I've known Andie. Forest has pushed me to think about every aspect of Andie, from her walk to her facial expressions to the way she carries her school books. ("Everything you do on the stage brings another layer to your performance," he once told me. "Remember that.") It's amazing to think something I've worked so hard on will only be seen by a select group of people for the next eight weeks and after that it won't exist anymore. Well, at least not with me in it. Forest already said the next actress they hire will keep the part for at least a year."This is a big week for all of us," Forest tells the small group that includes the company, Dylan, and Riley. Her pink cardigan is a surprisingly good choice on her, and I love how it hangs long in the front and she has it knotted at her waist over an ivory tank top. She's pulled her hair back messily in a bun, held in place with a chewed pencil. I've always wondered how to do that, but I obviously can't ask her."I think we've gotten a lot of interest from the press and media outlets thanks to our new star," Forest continues, reading from a clipboard. "The articles some of you have been part of have helped ticket sales tremendously. And I think your work at the Broadway Cares event last week really said a lot about our family. I'd like to keep that momentum going.""You want us to join the Broadway softball league?" Dylan jokes. He's sat down on the stage and is leaning back on his elbows, his body stretched out in front of him. He looks like he could fall asleep at any moment. "I'm not sure I'd be much help in that area. My expertise is in football--or, as Kaitlin calls it, soccer. Or maybe we could play cricket."Forest laughs. "I have a better idea. We just found out this morning that The View wants us on the show to perform a select scene."A murmur of excitement rises through the group. I've sat on the ladies' couch before and it can be both intimidating and fun at the same time, but I have a feeling I'm the only one here who has. Riley is talking a mile a minute to anyone who will listen about her love for Elizabeth, who coincidentally happens to be my least favorite. Figures."What scene?" someone asks.Forest looks from us to one of the producers. "Andie's breakthrough--the scene with Andie and Leo."Uh-oh. This won't go over well. I sneak a peek in Riley's direction. Riley's face is as pink as her sweater."That's a brilliant scene, Forest," Riley agrees, surprisingly. "But don't you think Kaitlin would fare better with more company onstage? Kaitlin works best when she has a group to support her."That's a backhanded compliment if I ever heard one."The View wants Kaitlin." Forest is completely unapologetic. "She's a face America knows and she's giving our show a face. The scene I picked is Kaitlin's best moment." He looks at me. "It truly is. Your emotions are raw and your words run deep, and it's a valuable showcase for your work."I can feel Riley watching me, but I don't look up. Instead, I examine my new sterling silver Tiffany necklace. I fell in love with the starfish pendant the other day when we strolled into the famous jeweler after practice and I bought Nadine and me matching ones on the spot.I still don't know how to deal with Riley's veiled jabs. To get out my frustration I've started taking Zumba classes. Liz comes too. She couldn't find a kickboxing class that worked with her new schedule, so the two of us have been taking Zumba, a Latin dance and music cardio class that includes merengue, salsa, mambo, rumba, and calypso. I may not be really good at any of the moves, but it's a lot of fun for releasing steam."The good news is that the rest of you can take the next few days off from rehearsals," Forest says to obvious excitement. "Get out of here! Get some color!" People start to disband, not waiting around for Forest to change his mind. I wait to hear what Forest wants me to do next. I usually stay after all the others. "And Kaitlin, you can too, if you want. Friday is your big day and we want you well rested."This Friday is D-Day. I stare at the empty chairs in the darkened area of the theater. Friday night I'll be standing here, on this stage, in front of over a thousand people. I think I might throw up."Maybe I should go over that scene for The View one or two more times," I tell Forest anxiously. "I'm not sure I have Andie's emotions just right.""You have them," he insists with a smile. "And think of The View on Thursday as good practice." I open my mouth to say more, but he stops me. "No buts. Take a few days off. Think about Andie all you want--from home." He grabs his stuff and heads offstage. I start packing up too, throwing my Vitaminwater, a wrapper from a Fiber One bar, and my notebook in my bag. I don't even realize Riley is standing there till I turn around, which of course, causes me to jump."Congrats, Kaitlin, on The View," she manages. She fiddles with her sweater, pulling the cardigan tight around her small frame."Thanks." I swallow, bracing myself for what she's going to say next. She will say something, I'm sure."I've always wanted to be on one of those silly American talk shows. So mindless but fun," Riley adds. "Right up your alley, I suppose. Have fun." She grabs her bag and starts to head offstage, hesitates, then turns back. "Some advice: during your big scene on the telly try not to look so pained, okay? You still tend to look like you need to go to the loo every time you emote something serious. Have you noticed that?" I shake my head before I can stop myself. "I thought you would have sorted it out by now, but I guess not. Bye!""Don't let her get to you." I hear Dylan and I turn around. He runs a hand through his close-cropped hair and I watch the action almost as if it is in slow motion, then I turn away quickly. Austin. Think about Austin. "She fancies your gig on The View. Totally jealous.""You think?" I'm afraid that slow-mo thing will happen again, so I don't dare look at him. "I don't think she's jealous of anyone. It's hard to be jealous when you think you're the finest theater actress alive."Dylan chuckles. "True. So are you still having that nightmare where you're onstage naked?""I didn't have it last night, actually." Dylan knows all my fears about live theater. The naked acting gig is my latest nightmare. I think Dylan was actually amused by the idea. He gets a twinkle in his eye whenever I bring it up."Good." Dylan surveys me. "Forest is right. You were worried about bits and bobs, but it's all good. You're ready. We can get together before then if you really want to rehearse some more, but you don't need it. We should celebrate. Maybe over lunch tomorrow? There's this great restaurant near my flat."I know I should say no, but I don't want to. Hanging out with Dylan is fun. "Lunch it is, then."My phone is vibrating and I pray it's Austin. I missed our scheduled phone call last night. We decided to set up a time to talk since we've been so bad about spontaneous chatting. I was busy shopping last night at this cute little boutique Nadine and I found I didn't hear my phone. I look at the caller ID. It's not Austin. "It's Sky." I sigh. "I should really take it.""Absolutely." Dylan's sympathetic face makes my heart flutter. "Don't want to leave her hanging. She's cheeky.""See you tomorrow." I hurry out the side door to the theater where Rodney and Nadine are waiting with the driver and answer the phone. "Guess what? I'm going to be on The View on Thursday!""K, I have no time for chitchat," Sky snaps, whispering. Her voice is echoing slightly and it sounds like she's hiding in a closet (it wouldn't be the first time), although I can hear faint music in the background. "This is important! I need you to listen instead of going on and ON and on about mindless details that I could care less about."Ah, I'm talking to that Sky today. "Fine. What's going on?" I ask, and wave to Nadine and Rodney as I slide inside the air-conditioned car, which is a sharp contrast to the humidity outside. New York really is sticky. Thankfully all the tall buildings cast big shadows so the sun doesn't beat down on you. Still, my choice of denim capris doesn't seem like such a good idea all of a sudden. It's a good thing I texted Nadine earlier and asked her to bring my T-Bags teal floral batwing-sleeved dress to change into. "And why are you whispering?""I'm in the bathroom at Geisha," she explains. I hear a toilet flush. "My agent is waiting for me at the table to give him a decision. I told him to come prepared with three offers.""Didn't you make that demand last night?" I feel a huge rush of panic. She's got options already? "I told you, the offers are going to come flying in after Saturday's show. Laney and Amanda told us that.""I can't take that chance," Sky huffs. I hear a door slam and heels click clacking across a floor. "I want an offer today! And of course, my agent said the same thing as yours. Give it a week, but I don't want to. I want a new job now. So I'm thinking--how do you feel about Dancing with the Stars? Or Celebrity Apprentice? I have offers from both. Hold on, K!" Her voice drops and I assume she's talking to a bathroom attendant. "Do you have any Aveda hairspray instead of this Suave garbage? My hair only responds to natural oils.""Sky, have you eaten a bad spicy tuna roll?" I'm completely flabbergasted. "You would never take an offer from either of those shows in a million years!""Yeah, but I could start working like tomorrow on their new seasons." Sky sounds a bit crazy. "Back on a set! Tomorrow! K, I need to get back on a set.""Calm down," I tell her sternly. "And listen: You are not taking either of those shows. Do you hear yourself? Dancing with the Stars?"Nadine looks up from her BlackBerry, which her short, stubby pink nails are typing away on, and looks at me oddly. "Sky?" she mouths. "Has she lost her mind?""Stay calm and wait a few days, do you hear me?"Nadine butts in, waving her freckled arms wildly. I love that coral scalloped flutter-sleeve top she's wearing. It looks like Juicy Couture, but that's impossible because Nadine would never--oh, that's mine! I think I remember her asking to borrow it. She's meeting a friend for lunch later. "Tell her to think of the other offers you two have that are bringing in exposure," Nadine's voice tumbles out in my ear. "That Fun nyordie.com clip you were asked to do sounds like a riot.""It's decent money, K!" Sky sounds desperate.HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER NINE: Just because you're a star doesn't mean you make money on a reality show. There are some where you can make an okay paycheck. Like--I can't believe I'm going to say this--Dancing with the Stars. Seth told me he had a client who got an initial payout of $125,000 to appear and then between $10,000 and $50,000 for every week he survived elimination. But there are shows like Celebrity Apprentice where stars get paid next to nothing. Same with The Bachelor, which I hear only covers housing while a person is off doing the show. Too bad there isn't a celebrity Bachelorette yet. Sky would love that gig. Maybe Ava and Lauren need reality shows, but Sky does not. I remind her of this and she starts to decompress."Okay, I'll wait." I hear another door open and then much more noise. She must feel safe enough to go back to her table. "I don't know what I was thinking. If you're not taking an offer like that, then I certainly shouldn't.""Mmm-hmm." I roll my eyes. Nadine can't hear what Sky is saying, but she laughs anyway. From my expression she can tell it's something quintessentially Sky. As soon as I hang up this phone, I am pulling my hair into a loose side ponytail to help beat the late June heat.When that's done, I sit back and let the air-conditioning continue to cool me down. Thank God Sky didn't ask where I was going. If I had told her I was meeting Liz, she would have wanted to come too--just to torture Liz. That's what the two of them seem to like to do best. Get on each other's nerves. But my loyalty still lies with Liz, and today is a best-friend outing.We pull up to Tortilla Flats on Washington Street and I hop out. Liz is already sitting outside at one of the Mexican joint's rickety sidewalk tables. I sort of wish we were sitting inside, but I know it's too nice a day to do that. Besides, last time we were here this loud group of women sat for hours at a table and we could barely hear ourselves think. The inside of Tortilla Flats is so much fun to look at. It's tiny, cramped, and sort of dingy, but it has the coolest decor. Every inch of the walls and ceiling is covered with Ernest Borgnine memorabilia, eccentric framed photos, twinkling lights hanging from the ceiling, and streamers. Liz sees me and waves, but her face looks too tired to actually smile. Her ensemble is the one making all of the statements today. She has on a bright green slip dress that is big and boxy and flows in the light breeze. I kiss her cheek, excuse myself to go to the bathroom (that car ride was too long!), change into my T-Bags dress, and then rejoin Liz."Hey!" I make my way to our table. "Why the long face?""I hate another one of my teachers." Liz grumpily munches on a tortilla chip. She dunks another into the salsa and it crumbles, which only seems to aggravate her more. "He called on me in class and I got the answer wrong and he asked me if I got it wrong on account of the fact I was too busy partying with celebrities to do my homework! I wasn't going to let it slide, of course, so I politely asked what he was referring to and he mentioned the photo of me out with you at the SNL after-party. As if that has anything to do with my class attendance! It was a Saturday night.""What is with people hating celebrities?" I hand her a menu. I already know what I'm getting. We've been here twice already and both times I got the queso dip to start and the cheese enchilada platter. "He's just jealous because he wasn't invited to the SNL after-party and you were.""I don't think so." She shakes her head, and her large hoop earrings whip around like they're going to fly off. "They hate Hollywood people.""Who does?""Everyone." Liz's face crumbles, her peach-glossed mouth slipping into a frown. "The other people in the workshop--who make little comments about me being from Holly-WOOD land. And the teachers act as if I think I deserve more props because I'm from there and my dad is in the business. I just want a fair chance, you know?"I nod. I so know. It's exactly how I feel about trying Broadway. I pray the critics this Friday night judge me on my actual performance, not the number of articles I've headlined in Hollywood Nation. "How'd you do on your pigeon piece?""I got a B," Liz says stiffly. Her face is flushed and I can't tell if she's mad or just hot. Her curly hair is down and frizzing all over the place. I'm trying to resist the urge to hand her a hair elastic."That's good, no?" I try to sound upbeat. I already know the answer: It's not when you're Liz and you expect straight As. She just glares at me. "The next one will be an A. Did you find a subject yet?" She shakes her head. "Forget their feelings about L.A.! Prove them wrong about Hollywood land or whatever they call it. I can be your next subject if you want. You can follow me around the day of the opening. Believe me, I'll display a whole range of emotions that will knock their socks off.""That's not a bad idea," Liz admits, grinning for the first time today. "I'll show them what Hollywood is really like. It's harder than they think!""Darn straight!" I laugh."This workshop is tougher than I thought it would be." Liz sighs and plays with the half a dozen gold bangles on her wrist. "Maybe I'm wrong about NYU. What if I can't cut it?" Liz asks seriously. "There are some great writing programs and directing workshops on the West Coast too, you know. Maybe I should look at some colleges near home.""Did your brain just fry from the hot salsa?" I sound startled, I know it. "You've wanted to come east forever!""Now that I'm east, I'm thinking I'm more of a West Coast girl," Liz says longingly. "Do you think that's bad?""I'm definitely a West Coast girl," I realize. I love it here, but it's exhausting! "But I haven't loved NYU forever either, the way you do. Hey, at least you're trying it now rather than calling your dad freshman year and begging him to let you come home."Liz grabs another tortilla chip. "Good point."We wind up staying at Tortilla Flats for almost two hours and then head over to the Tory Burch boutique to do some shopping. We both pick up the same playful blue-and-white floral pleated skirt. Liz gets a pair of funky three-inch-high beige sandals, and I pick up a green and white striped harbor shirt that I'll wear to one of the dozen Hampton events Mom keeps hounding me about. I curb my shopping there. I finally paid off my credit card bill from my shopping disasters last spring with Lauren and Ava."Dessert?" Liz hoists her shopping bag over her bare shoulder. "We worked up a sweat trying on all that stuff.""I guess if we made the long walk to Magnolia Bakery and then back to the apartment, we would burn some calories," I put in quickly. "Let's do it.""I spoke to Josh before you got to lunch," Liz tells me as we walk. "He says he spoke to Austin this morning.""At least someone did," I let slip. Liz gives me a surprised look. "Sorry. I'm just frustrated. Our schedules are so opposite that we barely have time to talk, and then sometimes when we do talk we're griping about not talking enough.""You're seeing him this weekend and that will make up for all the bad phone calls." Liz puts her arm around me, but it's hard to walk this way."I guess." I shrug. "I want to talk to him the way we've always talked, you know? I want him to know about Riley and what it's like being in this huge, cavernous theater and having to learn how to project my voice and wear a mic the whole time. But we barely have time to talk as it is and when we do, he doesn't ask about the show.""So bring it up to him," Liz suggests."He should bring it up," I say stubbornly and feel myself start to speed up. Liz's arm slips off my shoulder. That's another thing I've noticed about living in New York. I sort of speed walk everywhere. You can't help yourself. Everyone tends to move fast. At least I've started wearing the right shoes for all this walking. I have a new pair of Havaiana flip-flops that I leave in my bag and take everywhere. "Shouldn't he? I mean, Dylan asks me how I'm feeling all the time.""Kates," Liz warns. "Watch yourself there."I blush. "There's nothing to worry about. I love Austin. I just miss him a lot.""You guys will be okay." Liz sounds so sure of herself. I wish I was. "When does he fly in? Friday?"I nod. "His mom and Hayley are meeting him here. Mom suggested they stay at the Soho Grand, which I'm not sure is the Meyers' style, but at least it's really nice. Sky promised to look after them since I'll be so busy on Friday." Liz raises her eyebrows, but I let it go. "They don't leave till Monday afternoon, so during the day I'll have loads of time to show them around." I pause. "Except for Saturday when I have a matinee. And the night performances, but other than that.""Other than that, you're totally free." Liz grins. "This is going to be some schedule, but hey, at least you have your days free. We can take more dance classes.""Absolutely." I pull my hair down and then put it back up again in a normal pony. The side one was too annoying. "That's about the only thing that works with this schedule. That and meetings with Seth and Laney about my next big move, which between us, I have to say, I want to be something on TV.""Really, Kates?" Liz sounds excited. " That would be awesome.""Seriously? You don't think I'm crazy after complaining all those times about my schedule and workload?"She shakes her head. "You were glowing Saturday night. TV is your thing, Kates! Look how much fun Matty is having." Liz lowers her eyes. "Don't get mad, but sometimes when he's talking, you look a little jealous.""I am!" I say ruefully. "That's why it felt so good to do SNL. Being back with Sky and trading lines like that, acting so funny, it was fun! I need a new character to focus on. Someone a little lighter than Sam.""She was a bit melodramatic," Liz agrees, and I pinch her. "Well, she was!"Ten minutes later, we're standing in front of the miniscule Magnolia Bakery. I stay outside and try Austin on his cell while Liz gets two iced coffees and two cupcakes to go. It's not like I need an excuse to call him, but I'm feeling a little guilty about complaining about him to Liz and besides, I forgot to ask him where it was his mom wanted to have brunch on Sunday. I look at my watch. It's an hour earlier in Texas, so Austin should be on his lunch break. The phone rings and rings."Hello?" A girl answers, shouting over thumping music. "Hello?""Sorry, I must have the wrong number," I tell her apologetically, and prepare to hang up."Wait. Are you looking for Austin Meyers or Rob Murray? If so, you're in the right place.""Oh." I hesitate. Who is this girl answering their phone? "I'm looking for Austin.""A! Phone for you!" she yells.A? She's calling my Austin, A?"He's down the hall," another voice yells back."He's not here right now," the girl says. "Call back in five." She's giggling. "Carl, stop! I'm on the phone! I said, 'I'm on the phone!' " She laughs harder. "Sorry. He's tickling me. These L.A. boys are too much.""Can I leave a message?" I snap without realizing it. "Tell Austin his girlfriend called."Fine, it's childish, but I'm playing the girlfriend card. I'm staking my claim."I didn't know A had a girlfriend," the girl says, causing me to get even madder."It's Kaitlin," I tell her, trying to stay calm. "Can you just tell him I called?""No problem, Katrine," she says, and then she hangs up before I get the chance to correct her.Tuesday, June 23NOTE TO SELF:The View: Thurs. @ 11. B there @ 9:45 AMDinner w/ parents, Matty @ the Met 4 Mom: Thurs. 6:30 PMFriday: opening night! B there @ 5 PM.Austin & family get in @ 2PM. Have Rodney pick them up @ JFK.Find out who that girl was who answered "A's" phone!MEETING OF THE MINDSScene 10After Andie and Leo are caught kissing, Jenny is furious. She chases Andie back to the cafeteria to confront her. Jenny's friends and Andie's friends quickly take sides, and soon a riot starts. The class bell rings, but nobody moves. Andie has jumped up on a table to avoid the cheerleaders.ANDIE:(screaming at the top of her lungs) STOP!(The crowd grows quiet and looks up at her. Andie is a bit unsettled.)ANDIE:Good. Um, thanks for listening.JORDAN:Wow, Andie, who knew one day the queen bees would actually listen to what you had to say?JENNY:We're not listening! We're waiting till she climbs down so we can grab her.(Chorus of "Yah!" The girls try to grab Andie's legs. Becca and Jordan step in to stop them, and hair pulling ensues.)ANDIE:Wait! Wait! Don't you think this is a bit crazy? What are we doing? This is the last day of school and even today we can't find a way to get along for five minutes?JENNY:Not when you're kissing other people's boyfriends!ANDIE:He kissed me. (Jenny moves to grab her again.) Okay, okay, not that I stopped him. But that's not the point. The point is we all used to be friends and now we can't even say hi in the halls. Remember first grade? Jenny, you used to come over to my house every Monday after school. And Jordan--you and Katie took gymnastics together. Sara, you can pretend you didn't, but you used to play soccer with Becca. What happened to us? Why did we get so caught up in who is popular, who is not, who lives on the west side of town and who lives east of the river, who drives a Beamer and who has a '90 Nissan Sentra?JORDAN:That would be me and I'm proud to say that car drives quite well. (pause) When I'm not having it serviced.ANDIE:We should be supporting each other, not trying to find ways to tear each other down. What's the point of doing that?JENNY:There is no point. It's just fun to point out the obvious, like Jordan's terrible roots.JORDAN:It costs money to have my roots look this bad! You should know; yours are worse.JENNY:This is your last chance, Andie. I want you to leave. Now. And don't even think of showing up in a cap and gown tomorrow or you really will have to pay for trying to humiliate me by kissing my boyfriend. It's your choice. What's it going to be?ANDIE:I'm staying and I'd like to see you try to stop me.TEN: Opening NightIt's so quiet in the theater, you could hear a pin drop. I hear someone cough, but I tune out the sound. My eyes are on Riley--aka Jenny--and this is one of the biggest moments in the play. I'm trying not to think about that fact, though--or the fact that the audience is jammed with people I know tonight. My parents, Matty, Liz, Sky (who acted indignant when I asked if she wanted a ticket. "Of course I want a ticket!"), Nadine, Rodney, Laney, and Seth are seated in a box on the right-hand side of the theater. In the second row, center, are Austin, his mom, and his sister, Hayley. A few rows behind them are my friends Gina, Taylor, Miley, and Vanessa. Page Six said Lauren and Ava were going to crash the show, but Forest set up security to keep them out in case the rumors were true. Someone told me Kelly Ripa is here, but I haven't seen her. The Gossip Girl cast is supposedly here as well, but I'm trying not to think about that either. The most important thing I have to do right now is concentrate on the moment.I'm standing on top of a cafeteria table trying to avoid a mob of angry cheerleaders. My voice is strong and a little angry: "We should be supporting each other, not trying to find ways to tear each other down. What's the point of that?"Oh wow. I said that differently than I have in rehearsal. I usually say it softly, as if it's a delicate reminder of the truth. But tonight I'm fired up. I guess going live will do that to you. I was so nervous all day. I only had a banana for lunch. Nadine forced me to eat a power dinner with lots of protein (I had lemon chicken, which I love, and a big side of broccoli) and a huge bottle of water so I'd stay hydrated. Then I worried I drank too much water and I was going to have to pee during the first act. But I've been fine. So far. I was so anxious about tonight that I showed up at the theater two hours before the curtain went up. Liz and Nadine offered to hang backstage with me, but I told them I was too nervous for guests.I haven't even seen Austin yet--well, up close. (I can see his gorgeous face in the audience, though.) Rodney dropped his family off at the hotel around three thirty, and they had just enough time to grab a bite before they came to the theater. I told Rodney to bring Austin backstage during the brief intermission, but Austin called me before the curtain to wish me luck and tell me he would see me after the show. "I don't want to break your concentration," he insisted. "I want you at the top of your game, Burke." He was so sweet it almost made up for the fact that we hadn't talked in the three days before he arrived.I've been such a wreck about opening night. Dylan was sweet and took my mind off things by taking me to do karaoke somewhere in Koreatown after the show two nights ago. We had so much fun that I stayed out the second latest I ever have in New York so far (two-thirty AM. The SNL after-party stills holds the record at four AM.). Rodney was with me so Mom didn't freak out. After karaoke I was much calmer about tonight. I still had some minor meltdowns, but when I couldn't reach Austin, Dylan talked me off the ledge."I can't do this," I flipped out on the phone this morning. "I don't know what I was thinking. Live audience? LIVE? I can't go on live! What if I blow a line? What if I forget where to walk? What if I'm just plain awful?""You won't forget a line," Dylan's voice was calm. "You can sort it out, Kaitlin. You're brilliant as Andie. You're ready for Broadway.""You really think so?" Talking to Dylan this week has been like taking a huge swig of water after spin class. Or catching your breath after a long walk. I feel better instantly."I know so," Dylan insisted. "I can't wait to say 'I told you so' after the curtain drops."So that's what I'm doing right now. Trying to do the best job I can so that Dylan can say "I told you so" later."There is no point," Riley spits. She's wearing a cheer-leading uniform and she thrusts her pom-poms in my face. "It's just fun to point out the obvious, like Jordan's terrible roots." Someone else has a line and then Riley says: "This is your last chance, Andie. I want you to leave. Now. And don't even think of showing up in a cap and gown tomorrow or you really will have to pay for trying to humiliate me by kissing my boyfriend. It's your choice. What's it going to be?"My turn. "I'm staying," I shoot back, shuffling my feet on the plastic table. I'm wearing a casual pink tee and loose-fitting no-name jeans I normally wouldn't be caught dead in. "And I'd like to see you try to stop me."And scene! The curtain drops. End of act one.The applause is deafening, even from backstage. I'd give anything to peek through the curtain and see what people are doing. I can hear people whistling and clapping, and I can't help feeling pleased. They liked it! They liked the first act with me in it!When you're on a film set and you spend months making a movie, you never know how it will be edited or whether anyone will actually care to see it when you're done. It can be hard to find your motivation. But playing off the audience's reactions, like I've been doing tonight, is different from anything I've ever experienced. When they laugh, or they clap, or I catch a glimpse of someone's face and see their expression, it pushes me to want to emote more.I rush back to my dressing room for a quick touch-up, a costume change--a major bathroom break--and another huge gulp of water."Kaitlin!" Forest swings into my dressing room and hugs me. Tonight he's in a suit and tie. (Usually he's in jeans and an untucked dress shirt.) "Excellent first half. Just as I expected. How do you feel?""Unbelievable." The words spill out of my mouth and tumble over each other. "I've never felt like this when I've acted. Thank you, Forest." I'm getting choked up. "This has been...""Now, now, don't ruin your makeup." He holds up his hands to stop me just as the makeup artist rushes in again. "Keep it up. I know you will. We'll celebrate after, okay?"Dylan swings by my door next and I freeze. "Great job out there, treacle." I know now that's the British term for friend. "Did I tell you so?""You did." I hug him on impulse. Dylan's really been there for me this week and I can't thank him enough. Dylan hugs me back and neither of us moves. I'm very aware that Dylan's hand is on my lower back.A voice over the backstage loud speaker crackles through my small dressing room. "FIVE MINUTES.""I should..." I should what? Oh yeah, get ready!"Me too. Got to hit the loo. And remember to keep my mic off." Dylan gives me a lopsided grin. "See you out there."I take a few deep breaths to center myself. I'm not sure what has me more worked up: act two starting or Dylan, but I can't think about the latter right now. Instead I head to my spot on stage across from Riley. The curtain is down and our mics haven't been turned back on yet. She smiles at me."You're doing splendidly," she says. If I could, I would practically fall through the curtain and into the orchestra pit. "Of course, I wouldn't have ended the last scene the way you did. It was a row, but I pictured Andie having a more delicate touch. What do you think?"Riley likes to pose the question as if I have a choice, but I don't. She's usually right. She's been at this a lot longer than I have and no matter how uncomfortable she makes me, she usually has a point. "I didn't think of that.""No matter." Riley waves her hand away. "There is always tomorrow night for improvement, even if the critics have already made their decisions."Groan. The critics. Does she have to keep reminding me they're watching? I've never acted in front of a critic before. Whenever they reviewed FA or one of my films, obviously I wasn't there to see their reactions. It's sort of unsettling to know there are people in the audience paying attention to my every line and emotion.Riley laughs. "Bollocks! I didn't mean to upset you. You can't help it if your insecurities show on stage. It is your first time up there and, well, no one compares to Meg Valentine so don't you worry! I'm sure your press will be lovely." She looks pensive. "Just maybe tone down your attitude in this next scene. It's a tad overcooked, don't you think? Anyway, break a leg!"Oh God. Maybe I am bad at this. Maybe I don't have what it takes to be up here. Maybe... I feel a hand on my shoulder."She's being a proper arse," Dylan whispers in my ear. "You're brilliant. Give the second act all you've got." I blush at the feeling of his breath on my neck.Dylan's right. All I can do is my best--whether critics are watching or not. No one calls "cut" in a play. No one asks to "do that take again." No one has a meltdown and berates a crew member. You keep going no matter what happens.The second act flies by and I can't believe it's time for me to stand in the middle of the stage and take a bow. I'm holding hands with Dylan and Riley and the rest of the cast, and the audience is going wild. There are even people standing! A standing ovation! I look for Austin and see he's whistling. Then I look up at my family and friends and see they are smiling and clapping. Dylan is handing me a huge bouquet of flowers, since it's my opening night, and I bow again to even more applause.What a rush! I feel like the First Lady!And then the curtain falls again and everyone backstage is hugging and congratulating me and my head is completely spinning. I thank everyone for helping me get through my first night, even Riley. ("Don't worry! I'm sure you'll be stronger tomorrow!") I hug Forest, talk to everyone in the chorus, and make my way to the dressing area to change into my party dress (a fuchsia Plastic Island with spaghetti straps and a silk chiffon tiered bodice). On my way, Dylan stops me."You were brilliant! We should celebrate," he says with a cute grin. He's unbuttoned his shirt and I'm trying not to stare at his abs."I can't," I manage to say. "My--"The word boyfriend gets caught in my throat. Whoa. What's that about? Why did I hesitate to say Austin's name?"My boyfriend." Oh good, I've said it. "He's here and we're going out with my family." I still feel weird, though, and I can't look Dylan in the eye. That is so odd. What is happening to me? I know Dylan and I have been spending a lot of time together, but my heart belongs to Austin even if he's not here with me. Right?RIGHT?Dylan nods and looks at me wistfully. "A raincheck then. Have a great time.""I will." Why do I feel all tangled up inside? There's no time to dwell on what I'm feeling. I have to get changed. Rodney is waiting for me to take me out the side door where fans will be waiting.HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER TEN: If you want to get up close and personal with your favorite actor, seeing them in a Broadway show might be one of the best ways to do it. Most actors emerge from a side entrance of the theater--never the front doors where crowds are--and take a few minutes to sign autographs or pose for pictures before they jump into a waiting car. They usually do this night after night after every show they perform in. Seth told me it's a great way to appear as down to earth as the rest of the cast. I like to think of it as a way of giving back to the fans who shell out anywhere from forty to sometimes two hundred dollars for a ticket.Rodney has my arm as we open the side door and people start screaming. I can't help but smile. I was a little worried no one would be out here tonight, but the area is crowded with teens and adults. Some news outlets are out here too. I smile politely and wave to them, but my focus is on the fans. I scribble my name on as many Playbills as I can, take a few pictures, and then I'm in the car."Surprise," Austin says when I slide in pretty much on top of him, my chiffon dress gliding over the seats."What are you doing here?" I squeal and envelop him in a huge hug.It feels good to hold him and as soon as I do, any insecurity I have about this increasing weirdness with Dylan seems to melt away. He's here! Austin is here. And if he's here, everything is going to be okay. It has to be."Rodney snuck me in," Austin says. He's wearing a navy suit and a yellow tie for the occasion and I couldn't be more touched. Plus, he fills it out perfectly. Liz and I were just complaining that no one dresses up for the theater anymore and it seems like such a shame. I remember coming to New York with my mom when I was seven for a Family Affair event and she took me to see Beauty and the Beast. I had on this poofy red dress and little black satin shoes and I felt like such a big shot sitting on a booster seat in the theater. I reach out to touch his tie, just wanting to be close to him. "Burke," he says, looking at me seriously with those big blue eyes of his, "you were incredible. I know I missed your calls a lot this week and I feel stupid because I know how stressed you must have been getting ready for tonight.""It's okay," I say even though two hours ago it wasn't. I don't want to talk about bad things right now. "I know you're busy too." He's busy, but I've still managed to leave him encouraging messages about camp."It's not okay," he insists. "I've been a bad boyfriend, but I'm here now and I'm going to make it up to you. You looked amazing up there." He leans in to kiss me.If I was at all unsure before, I know for certain how I feel right now. When Austin kisses me it feels like we haven't been apart at all even though it's been two weeks. I reach up with my right hand, my oversized silver clutch bracelet sliding up my arm, and touch his cheek. Austin's fingers interlock with my other hand. I'm starting to feel so much better. Anything I was thinking about Dylan before must have been in my head. Austin is the only guy for me."So tell me everything," I say when we come up for air. "How are the scrimmages? Do you like the camp a lot? What are your coaches like?"Austin chuckles. "I know we haven't talked a lot this week, but I want to hear about you tonight. Did you feel like you were going to throw up?""No!" I swat him. "I was feeling faint, but in a good way. It's such a rush. Now tell me about your dorm mates. Who do you hang out with?"What I really want to ask is if there is a girl who has been hanging out in his room when he isn't there. But I don't. Nadine, Liz, and Sky--amazingly she agreed with Liz and Nadine on this one--said I shouldn't bring it up. They said that I was overreacting and that the girl was surely a friend and Austin adored me (well, Sky didn't say that, but she did say he was that school boy I didn't shut up about). I know he adores me. I just hate that I can't see what's going on when I'm so far away."Murray and I pretty much stick together," Austin gives in. "The other guys seem cool. Some of them have been playing much longer than us. There are a few that are on more than one team. It never even occurred to me to be on a school team and a local one. Who has the time?"I play with the uneven hem of my dress, feeling the purposefully frayed edges of the fabric. "You practice every afternoon. When would you work with another team?""I know!" He sounds incredulous. "But I guess that's what I have to do next year. I'm lucky the local league had room for me, you know? They even okayed the fact that I'll miss the first week of practice since I'll still be at camp.""You signed up for the other league?""Yeah, I told you about that." Austin gives me a strange look. "One of the coaches is a coach at the summer camp so I had an in.""No you didn't." I know I'm being argumentative, and ungracious, but I just can't stop it from coming out of my mouth. Things were so perfect a second ago!"I could have sworn I did." Austin scratches his head, making his hair look even more tousled than it was a second ago. "It was during that call where you told me about the SNL review that said you and Sky should do a sitcom.""I didn't tell you about that." I swallow, trying not to get annoyed. Austin is bringing up all the things that annoy me on the phone. "I wanted to, but you were half-asleep when I called.""Oh, I must have read that on my own then." Austin plays with the band of his gold Citizen watch. "All my scrimmage scores are online to read too, by the way, in case you were wondering about how I was doing."I'm always wondering how he's doing! Geez!Okay, Kaitlin, stop.Austin is here for a short time and I don't want to fight. I want to have a good time together. "I'll check them out," I say even though it kills me.That seems to make him happy because he stops bickering too. "I can't believe I'm with you in New York City." He takes my hand. "And I'm here all weekend. Thanks for setting stuff up to do while you're working, but like I told my mom and sister, during shows, I'm going to be at the theater."God, his eyes look amazing in the glow of the city lights."You can't watch me all weekend," I protest, even though I find the notion incredibly romantic. My boyfriend sitting in the front row, staring at me and only me on the darkened stage. Sigh... I think Broadway is making me more mushy."So," he says, and rubs my hand, "that was Dylan, huh?" He doesn't look at me when he says it, but then when he finally does look at me, he's sort of serious.Sigh. Why does he have to bring up Dylan now? Just hearing Austin say Dylan's name makes me feel guilty, which is weird because I haven't done anything wrong.I think. Is it wrong to have all these strange thoughts running through my head?"The guy playing Leo?" I try to sound nonchalant. Austin nods. "Yeah, that's him. He's cool. He's been helping me with my lines.""As long as that's all he's helping you with." Austin stares at me long enough that I can tell he means it. "He'd better not be hitting on my girl."Is Austin jealous? No way. He's not the type. "I don't think so," I assure him, even though a tiny voice at the back of my head is screaming Dylan is interested in you!"So Hollywood Nation has this one wrong--he doesn't have a major crush on you?" Austin asks slowly.They wrote that? How did I miss that article? Nadine usually always shares that sort of stuff with me. "There is nothing going on there," I protest a little too strongly, and Austin looks at me oddly. Okay, even if Dylan is interested, I'm not. I just think he's cute and charming and very considerate. Which is allowed. I think. But I don't say any of that out loud. "My heart belongs to you." Wait. Did I just say that out loud? That was sort of corny. I blush a little, but it actually seems to be the right thing to say, because his full lips turn back up into a smile."Good." Austin doesn't have dimples like Dylan but his smile is even better. "So let's go over this again--I'm watching you work all weekend." I attempt to protest, but he puts his hand on my lips and levels his blue eyes on mine, tucking his chin in like he's administering a scolding. "That's why I'm here, Burke, to see you. In the morning we'll do some tourist stuff, and we can have dinner between your two shows tomorrow and brunch on Sunday. Burke, I want to be with you as much as I can. After this weekend, I won't see you..." He stops."You won't see me for at least a month," I finish glumly. We both looked at our calendars and realized the next few weekends--well, Mondays and Tuesdays for me--are crazy for both of us. Austin has back-to-back games and some aren't on campus. I have events that Mom booked in the Hamptons and here in the city. The first chance I'll have to go to Texas is the end of July. Then both Austin and I head home to Los Angeles in August."But I'm here now." He kisses me again.While we're kissing I feel a vibration on my leg. I pull my phone out of my jacket pocket, and stare at it strangely. My phone isn't even on. "It must be yours." Austin pulls his own phone out of his suit jacket and looks at the screen before breaking into a wide smile. Then he starts texting."Is that Hayley?" I ask casually. "Tell her I swear we will find time to hit Bloomingdale's while you guys are here.""Actually, it's someone from camp." Austin is still texting. "This girl Amanda I'm friends with. She wanted to know how your show went."Amanda? Hmm... "She didn't happen to answer your phone the other day when I called, did she?"I know I said I wouldn't bring it up, but I can't help myself. Austin gave me an in!Austin looks up, confused. "When did you call and I didn't answer?""The other day." I try to sound nonchalant. "I wanted to check on brunch reservations, but this girl answered and she acted like she didn't know who I was."Austin nods. "If it was Amanda she was probably confused," he says. "She's been hanging out with us a lot. She just broke up with her boyfriend, Kevin, who's also at camp, and she's been pretty upset about it. We can't get her off our couch." He laughs. "But if it was her, I don't get why she didn't know you. I talk about you all the time." He looks worried, which makes me worried. Is he worried because there is something going on or worried because he thinks I'll be mad? He's not flirting with this girl or spending a lot of time with her, is he? Because that is so wrong!It's wrong, but isn't it the same thing I'm doing with Dylan?"I'm sure she didn't hear me right," I say quickly, feeling bad now for even bringing it up. "Besides, she knows who I am now, right?"His phone buzzes again. Austin reads the text and laughs."What?" I ask, a frantic edge to my voice. Oops."Amanda again. She said something funny about camp, but it's too hard to explain."Oh. A camp thing. Between Austin and Amanda. The A-Team. Fun.Chill, Kaitlin. Don't act like a jealous girlfriend.Austin texts back quickly and then, to my surprise, turns off his phone. "But that's enough for tonight. Tonight is about your Broadway debut." He puts his arm around me and I lean into his shoulder, feeling content. "And I can't wait to celebrate."Friday, June 26NOTE TO SELF:Sat. AM: Empire State Bldg., St. Pat's, lunch @ Shake ShackMatinee then dinner res.--where in midtown??? Nadine, help!!!Sun. AM: Res. at Bubby's w/ A's fam, my parents, Matty, LizMatinee then dinner--Gramercy Tavern following show (is it still open??)Mon. Off!Tues-Sat.: B @ theater 5:30 PM-6 PM. Wed. matinee @ 2.HollywoodPrivateEyes.com
"I did," I say, my voice quickening. "It's about a bunch of college freshmen. Kind of Friends-ish. But edgy. There're these two great female characters in it that I just love.""That's great," Austin says and he sounds like he means it. "So which one are you going to go for? Have they offered another girl one of the parts? Maybe Dylan could play your roommate in drag. Or your boyfriend on the show. I mean, if he likes you I would imagine he would want to stay near you after the play ends."I can be obnoxious too. "Just like Amanda, right?" I snipe. "Maybe she can move to Los Angeles and play lacrosse with you and then she can answer your phone all the time!""That's not such a bad idea," Austin says gruffly. "At least Amanda is honest with me.""Really?" I bark. "Has she been honest about telling you how much she likes you? Because she's made it obvious to me."Austin doesn't say anything."Doesn't feel so good being hounded about someone you're not interested in, does it?" I ask getting angrier now. As mad as I am, I'm also crying. This is not good at all. Maybe we should hang up and cool off before continuing. I'm about to suggest just that when I hear a girl's voice.De-amanda."I'm on the line with my girl," Austin says. "Can I pop over in a minute?"At least he's still calling me his girl."No can do, loverboy," Amanda says. "We're taking you guys out and we have to go now. Major surprise. We've already got Rob in the car. Tell your favorite B-lister you'll have to chat later."Hey, I'm not B-list!"Austin, tell her you need a minute," I insist, sounding aggravated, which I am. "This is important."But instead of answering me, the next thing I hear is a dial tone.WHOA.That had to be a mistake. RIGHT? Austin wouldn't hang up on me and go out with some other girl. I stare at my phone, waiting for it to ring.Any second now...Still waiting...I drum my fingers on my dressing table nervously. I am not calling him. He should call me! He must know the hang up was on his end! Maybe he didn't even hang up. Maybe De-Manda did. In which case, he should definitely call me back. God, I can't stand that girl and I don't even know what she looks like. She probably has a perfect, sporty body. She is so trying to make a move on my boyfriend! MAKE HIM CALL, I will the iPhone. RING, I silently pray. But it doesn't. I keep staring at the main screen, which has a picture of me and Austin at the junior prom on it.RING! RING! RING!And then it does."Hello?" I say eagerly."Sweetie, what is this I found on your nightstand in your room?" It's Mom and she sounds highly annoyed."Mom, I can't talk now." And I don't have a clue what she's talking about. What did she find that could have her this worked up?"Tell the truth, Kaitlin Elizabeth Burke!" Mom says sternly.Oh, I know what she found. I better come clean. "I'm sorry," I apologize. "I've only had one. Okay, maybe two. But I've been working out every day! My trainer says it's good to treat yourself sometimes. They're less than a hundred calories, Mom.""What are you talking about?" Mom asks."The mini Twix," I say. "You found the bag in my top drawer, right?""No," Mom says and tsks. I hear her open a drawer. "But now that I know about them they are disappearing! You don't need chocolate. I'm talking about that TV show! That one you and Seth like. Why are there notes on the copy he gave you? And phone numbers? You are not thinking about auditioning for it, are you?"Um, yes? Simply put, I love it. I'm particularly into the character Hope, who is sassy, funny, and socially inept. She's the perfect foil for hardnosed Taylor, who is book smart during the day and a social butterfly at night. I could see Sky and me playing these girls. I just have to convince Mom and Dad of that."Mom, I really like it," I beg. "It's a great part. If you'd just read it--""Are they still thinking about Sky for the other girl?" she asks calmly."Yes, but--""LANEY!" Mom shrieks and I hear another click on the line, then sudden swooshing and... is that waves crashing? A seagull chirping? Laney doesn't have time for the beach."Absolutely not, Kaitlin!" Laney hisses, but her voice is barely a whisper, which means it is a Laney imposter. The real Laney is loud all the time."Um, Mom, I think you got your lines crossed," I say. "That is not Laney.""It is too!" she hisses again. "I'm on a shoot for Vanity Fair with Reese and the photographer threatened to have me banned from the set if he heard me on my Bluetooth again. Can you imagine?" she whispers hotly. "Me being banned from the beach! The beach is public! PUBLIC." Her voice rises and she clears her throat. "Public, which means I can't be banned," she finishes in a whisper. "But my answer is still the same if Sky is involved. No.""See?" Mom says, sounding triumphant. "This is out of the question.""But you guys have been so nice to Sky while she's been in New York," I remind them. "Mom, you even said you liked her.""As a person, yes, but as a coworker for you, no," Mom says defensively. "You'll be fighting again in a week and then the stories will follow on Celebrity Insider and in Hollywood Nation. I feel a migraine coming on just thinking about it.""But what if...," I start to say."No!" Mom and Laney say in unison and Laney says it sort of loudly."KAITLIN! THINK!" Laney continues, yelling so loudly that I have to hold the phone away from my ear. "THIS HAS BAD MOVE WRITTEN ALL OVER IT. I DON'T CARE WHAT SETH SAYS! HE'S WRONG!" The next thing I hear is a bit of a rustle. Then Laney's voice is sort of muffled. "Hey! Wait! No, I'm getting off now! YOU CAN'T DO THIS! The beach is PUBLIC!" Click."I don't want to hear about this again," Mom says. "I've been so relaxed out here in the Hamptons, enjoying a quiet summer, and then I come back to the apartment for twenty-four hours and get stressed. No more talk of this pilot! Do you understand?""Mom," I beg."Kaitlin, how do you know Sky even wants to do this with you?" Mom asks. "Maybe her people hate the idea as much as we do and you're just fooling yourself. " I don't say anything. "When we get back to Los Angeles you can look at something else to do. Anything but another play. They just don't pay." She sniffs.HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER THIRTEEN: Even if you make twenty million dollars a movie, you will make peanuts doing live theater. Stars who take the stage do it to broaden their acting range and for the prestige that comes with having your name in a Playbill. They don't do it for a paycheck. Most stars, even big ones, are lucky to bring home three thousand dollars a week. A lot to the rest of the world, but not those who spend their disposable income on Louis Vuitton luggage."If you're set on TV, then we can look at some other shows if you want," Mom continues, "but you are not repeating what's been done before. End of story." Click.I cover my face with the nearest thing I can find--my Burberry raincoat (it's pouring today) and scream into it at the top of my lungs.I'm so mad at everyone right now! Austin! Mom! Lauren, Ava, Riley! I'm sick of being picked on!Mom is overreacting! I didn't say I was definitely doing the show, just that I was interested in meeting with the network about it. To be honest, I haven't even discussed the pilot with Sky yet. Part of me is afraid to ask her what she thinks of it. What if she hates it? What if she thinks working together again would be the nightmare it once was? I'd rather not hear her say that.There's a quick knock on my door and I turn around. "Come in!"Sky and Nadine march in, looking like wooden soldiers. Their faces are stoic.I groan. "What is it?" I snap. "I'm in no mood.""Too bad," Sky says and slams her iPhone down on my dressing table. Great. More phone grief. The screen has a small video on pause. "Watch it," she insists.I look at them both curiously and then press play. I'm not surprised to see Lauren and Ava's faces staring back at me. They're introducing a clip they call "Lucky Ladies." Then the clip goes animated and it's a cartoon about me and Sky with cutouts of our real faces on animated bodies. We're singing some weird song about what has-beens we are and how Sky's pilot was canceled and all I can get is a part on Broadway for three months. Then they say how Family Affair was our last chance at stardom and now it's gone.Ouch."I hate them," Sky shrieks before I even finish the clip. She is visibly upset. "I'm tired of this game. They're cruel. And they're lame. I want out of this twisted drama." Sky looks at me darkly. "Enough with this high road garbage, K. I've done my part bashing them, now it's your turn. It's going to take two of us to take them down.""I don't know," Nadine says. "Do you two really want to stoop to their level?" She looks at Sky. "I'm mad too! They have to be stopped, but is adding more fuel to the fire going to do it? Kaitlin, you're better than these games.""K, think about the Hamptons," Sky begs. "They could have cost you your job.""Forest wouldn't have fired her for missing the show," Nadine insists. "He might have been mad, but he would have gotten over it. It wasn't her fault.""Exactly," I say, exasperated, "but it still happened. Riley being mad at me because she likes Dylan isn't my fault either, but if I keep letting things slide, then she keeps being condescending and makes me feel like I don't deserve to be here. I'm sick of it!" I yell. Nadine's eyes widen. "I'm sick of De-Manda, and Austin sleeping through phone calls, and Lauren and Ava using me and Sky to get on Access Hollywood! I'm tired of being nice. It doesn't get me anywhere.""Yay, K! You're growing a backbone," Sky says proudly."Kaitlin, you beat Riley at her own game when you made it to the show from the Hamptons anyway," Nadine reminds me. "I saw her face when we showed up here. She was flabbergasted."I shake my head. "It's not enough. I want her to feel the way I feel sometimes. I want her to feel small and powerless for a change." I look at Sky. "And Lauren and Ava too. And Austin!" I add."What did Austin do?" Nadine frowns."I don't want to talk about it right now." I turn away. "I'll get upset before the show.""TEN MINUTES," the intercom announces."Um, we should go," Nadine says, grabbing Sky's arm. "I don't want Kaitlin getting worked up.""I'll be right there," Sky says. "I need a minute with K."Nadine gives me a look. "Okay. Kaitlin, just calm down and think about your performance. I'll be watching in the audience. It's my eighth time seeing you. Could be a record for family and friends."When Nadine is gone, Sky starts talking at once. "I was wondering if... I thought maybe you... did you... oh hell, did you read the pilot for Big Fish, Small Pond?""Yes!" I jump up and grab her. "It was incredible, wasn't it? Did you like it?"Sky looks freaked out. "Chill, K. I didn't like offer you a million dollars or anything. Yes, I read the pilot. So what?""What do you mean 'so what'?" I say. "You were the one who asked if I read it first.""Who cares who is first?" Sky gets huffy. "Like I care that you read it first.""Whoa, this is not a competition," I tell her. "What I meant to ask is, are you interested? I mean, if they want both of us, are you maybe at all interested in going back down that road with me?" Sky seems unsure and I find myself holding my breath.But I don't get to hear Sky's answer. My door flies open again and one of the stagehands is standing there looking impatient. "Kaitlin, five minutes. You have to get to your mark.""Right. Sorry," I apologize.He slams the door. I look at Sky."We'll talk later," Sky says hurriedly, grabbing her Louis Vuitton bag from my dressing counter. "I changed my flight back to Los Angeles. I'm, um, staying in town another few weeks. Just going to enjoy the city." She looks down at the floor."You didn't answer me," I try again."I probably won't have time to hang out," Sky says. "I can't, you know, hang out backstage waiting around for you. I have a job hunt going.""Sky," I say, but she slams the door behind her.It's like a switch that turns on and off with Sky. She just can't admit we're actually friends now, can she? Why can't she tell me what she thinks about the TV pilot?My door opens a crack and Sky sticks her head back in. "Yes," she says simply."Yes, what?" I ask."Yes, I like the show even if you are in it," she snaps. But then she starts to smile, just a little, and I start to smile too. "I guess I can survive a few more years with you around. We'll discuss billing later--my name should go first." Then she slams the door again.She's into it! Sky is just as into the show as I am and is cool with the fact that we could be working together again! We have a shot here. This could work. I need to call Seth.But first, I have a show to do. I look down at my phone. No missed calls. That gets me crazy again. There's no time to call Austin, but...I can't stand it. I'm calling Austin. It will just take a second. The cell phone rings twice and then it picks up. "Austin?""Nope, it's Amanda," she says. It's loud wherever she is."I need to speak to my boyfriend," I tell her."Sorry, Hollywood girl, he can't come to the phone.""PUT HIM ON NOW, " I insist."Oooh... getting angry, huh?" Amanda laughs."Who is that?" I hear Austin's voice."Your girlfriend," Amanda tells him. "I told her you'd call her back, A.""HE wants to speak to me," I tell her. She's in for it now. Austin won't let her push me off. He's probably as upset about before as I am. I wait for him to pick up."Tell her I'll call her later," I think I hear him say, but his voice is sort of muffled. It's loud in the background and the connection isn't the greatest. The old walls in this building are so thick.But I couldn't have just heard him say that. He wouldn't say that. He wouldn't push me off for Amanda!"HE said he'd call you back," Amanda says smugly. "Bye, princess." Click.I hold my phone in my hand, dumbfounded. What exactly just happened? Why didn't Austin get on the phone? Why didn't he get on the phone with his girlfriend?The more I think about it, the angrier I get. At Austin, even though I don't know what's going on. At Riley. At Ava and Lauren. At Mom and Laney for dismissing this TV show. I storm over to my spot backstage next to Riley and Dylan. Sky is right. Being nice gets you nowhere. I can sense Dylan staring at me and even though Riley is watching us, I turn to him."Dylan, what are you doing tommorow?" I ask.Dylan looks flustered. "Nothing. Why?""I was wondering what you were doing for an early dinner. There is this Italian place I'm dying to try. Bellavitae.""Sounds lovely." Dylan smiles. "Do they have good biscuits?""I'm sure they make a mean chocolate chip cookie." I don't know that, but I can see Riley starting to squirm, so I keep going. "Would you like to go with me?""As your date?" he asks curiously.I look at Riley. Her face is stricken. Being nice doesn't work, I remind myself. "Yes.""Brilliant," Dylan says. "It's a date then."Someone calls Dylan's name and he turns to them."Don't you have a partner?" Riley asks quietly so that only I can hear."That's none of your business," I snap, not looking at her. I'm enjoying the effect this is having on her. My heart is pounding. "I can't wait to go to Bellavitae with Dylan," I gush. "It's so romantic." Riley doesn't say anything, which just makes me want to upset her more. "Maybe I'll wear that cute little Christian Siriano dress that he made for me. It's so short.""TWO MINUTES," I hear someone say."Oh, and Riley?" She turns to look at me now. "In the second act tonight, when we're doing the scene right before I run out to the lockers, maybe you could go easy on your attitude." Her jaw drops. "You're sort of overplaying the scene and I'd hate for you to ruin things for the rest of us."Take that, Riley.* * *Tonight, I play Andie angrier than I ever have before, but I'm pumped up and the audience doesn't seem to be bothered by it. When I get offstage, I rush to my dressing room and the first thing I do is pick up my iPhone and dial. I don't think. I act."Austin, it's me," I say on his voicemail. "Sorry you're so busy with Amanda that you can't take my call. I hope you two are having fun. I'm sure Amanda is easy to have fun with since she sounds like she's been hit in the head one too many times with a lacrosse ball. In case you need to talk to me, I won't be around tomorrow. I'm having dinner alone with Dylan. This sweet little romantic place. Maybe I'll catch you on Monday." Click.Take that, Austin.Take that, De-Manda.Now it's time to fry Lauren and Ava.Saturday, July 18NOTE TO SELF:Sunday: Meet Dylan at 4PMHOLLYWOOD NATION HOME NEWS STYLE PHOTOS ENTERTAINMENT CELEBRITIESSCOOP PATROLSunday, July 18thKaitlin Burke Calls Hollywood Nation to Set the Record Straight about Her FeudFresh from the stage after another performance in Meeting of the Minds on Broadway, Kaitlin Burke called a reporter from Hollywood Nation to talk about the "severe injustice" that is affecting both her and former costar Sky Mackenzie--aka her war of words with Lauren Cobb and Ava Hayden. Until now, Kaitlin has kept the mud-slinging to a minimum. But last night, in this exclusive, Kaitlin was ready to put on a raincoat and let the words fly!Kaitlin had this to say: "Lauren and Ava are talentless girls with nothing better to do than talk trash about the famous people around them," she said by phone from her dressing room at the theater. "I used to feel sorry for them, but I don't anymore. Those two are gunning for Sky and me and the only reason they're doing it is they have no other way to keep their names in the press. They're dying to be the new Heidi and Spencer, and that's pathetic because those two are equally spotlight-hogging wannabes."Wow, has Little Miss Nice started sounding like Sky all of a sudden? "Maybe," says Kaitlin. "And if that's true, that's probably a good thing. Sky has never been afraid to express herself and no one messes with her. Well, I'm tired of being stepped on. The Laurens, Avas, Rileys, and De-Mandas of the world better watch out, because I'm not going to take their garbage anymore."When asked who Riley and De-Manda were, Kaitlin fumbled, and quickly said she had to go. But one thing is for certain, this new Kaitlin is ready to rumble!FOURTEEN: Rash Decisions Can Cost YouAustin hasn't called me back.That's all I can think about as I get ready for my date with Dylan Sunday afternoon. I try to distract myself with the details, like how I'm wearing my hair (who cares? I'm leaving it down and I don't even care about taming my summer frizz) and what I'm wearing. (Sigh. Like I care about that either.) I grabbed the first thing I could find in my closet: a indigo blue strapless Free People dress with a sweetheart neck and knot center that I've never worn yet. I was going to wear it on a date with Austin, but I wasn't sure if I liked how it hung on my hips. Today I'm too depressed to care.Date.I'm going on a date with Dylan.As in, I am going on a date with someone other than my boyfriend, Austin.Either Austin and I have just agreed to try some crazy new only-in-Hollywood dating agreement or we're... or we're...Breaking up.That's the only reason either of us would go on a date with someone else, right? If Austin went on a date with De-Manda and I'm going on a date with Dylan then we must be breaking up.Do I want to break up with Austin?I keep pulling my iPhone out of my bag and staring at the screen hoping I have a missed call from him. But I don't. I still haven't gotten a call by the time I get to Bellavitae, where Dylan is already sitting at a table waiting for me.The restaurant is just one long room with wide-planked wood floors and beamed ceilings and they have jars of what looks like olive oil and balsamic vinegar lining the walls. Sure it's a little basic, but foodies and stars in the know tell me the dishes are unreal. I hear they have these amazing Polpettine Fritte (fried little meatballs) and Spaghetti Cacio e Pepe (spaghetti with Pecorino Romano and cracked black pepper). They normally open at five-thirty on Sundays, but I called and they agreed to serve us an hour earlier, so the place is very quiet. Too quiet. I can hear all the voices in my head talking about Austin and I can't get them to shut up.Are Austin and I breaking up? Is that why I'm here right now?"Hi," Dylan says, jumping up and pulling my chair out for me. "You look lovely.""Thanks." I take a seat. I'm very nervous all of a sudden. That's not true. I've been nervous all day. When I told Nadine where I was off to, she barely looked at me. She knows Austin and I had a fight, and that I called Hollywood Nation without clearing it with Laney, but she isn't offering any of her trademark advice. "You look nice too," I say to Dylan.Dylan doesn't look anything like Austin. His hair is cropped short, and very dark, and his body, while just as fit, is long and lean rather than muscular. I can practically see his taut stomach through the fitted green shirt he's wearing with khaki linen pants. He looks good. Really good. And his green eyes seem to lock in everyone from the bartender to the waitress asking for his autograph. She only melts more when he speaks in that charming British accent of his."Would you like something to drink?" Dylan asks me. "We should celebrate. I know we've had dinner before, but this is sort of our first official date, isn't it?"Date. We're on a date. I'm on a date with someone other than my boyfriend. At least Austin was my boyfriend twenty-four hours ago, before he went on a date too.The only thing is, I don't know for sure if Austin was on a date, do I? He didn't tell me he was on a date. He didn't tell me anything! He didn't get on the phone! The only thing I know is he was out with Amanda. And we had a fight. Our biggest fight ever. Part of that is my fault. I've been wrapped up in my own life and haven't really given a lot of thought to what has been going on in Austin's.Why am I on a date again?"Kaitlin?" Dylan looks at me curiously. "I asked if you wanted a drink.""Sorry!" I laugh lightly and kind of wave my arms around. I look at my wrist. I'm not even wearing a watch. Huh. I never forget to wear a watch. "I don't know where my head is.""That's okay. You're here and that's all I want." Dylan looks at me hopefully and smiles. He's got a great one. But it's not Austin's, I realize. And that's the one that makes my heart melt.I look at Dylan again. He's cute. Very cute. And charming, but... Dylan is my friend (a hot friend, for sure). But Dylan doesn't want to be friends. I know that he wants more and right now I'm taking advantage of that. I've taken advantage of that a lot actually. Dylan's helped me through this Broadway transition and been a shoulder to cry on and I guess I've sort of used him to fill in for Austin while we're apart.God, how bad is that? I didn't do it on purpose, but now that I think about it, that's what I've been doing. I've been trying to replace Austin since he's not around, and that's ridiculous because he's the only one I really want.And yet I'm sitting here in his romantic restaurant on a date with Dylan. I asked Dylan out to get back at Austin and to upset Riley. How ridiculous is that? I'm hurting Dylan, who has been nothing but good to me; I'm hurting Riley, who has genuine feelings for Dylan; and most of all, I'm hurting Austin.We're going to break up over this, aren't we?Oh my God, I so don't want to break up with Austin!"Will you excuse me a second?" I try not to sound choked up. Before Dylan can even answer, I head straight for the bathroom. There's an attendant in there, but I barely even smile before I lock myself in a stall and burst into tears. I pull my iPhone out of my bag and dial Austin's number. It rings twice and goes to voicemail.I don't want to break up. I don't want to break up.I DON'T WANT TO BREAK UP!"Austin, it's me," I say softly, pulling myself together, but sniffing and shaking too. "I'm sorry. I'm SO sorry. I know we had a fight, but I don't want to break up. I'm not on a date with Dylan. I mean, I am here, but I know it was a mistake. I was trying to make you mad because you made me mad when you were out with Amanda and didn't take my call. Nothing is going on. I swear. Please call me back. We need to talk."I hang up and burst into tears.In all my time with Sky, I've never taken her advice before, and I choose now to take it? I'm not a mean person, even if I want to be sometimes. Just thinking about the things I said to Hollywood Nation last night gives me a headache. I thought I could take on the Laurens and Avas of the world, but I think Nadine is right. Sometimes you have to take the high road. That is not the road I'm on right now. Right now I'm on a date with a very nice guy just to make other people jealous. And this could cause the relationship I cherish to fall apart. That makes me cry harder.I must have been in there a while because eventually someone knocks on the door."Miss, you all right in there?""I'm fine!" I dab at my eyes with some toilet paper. My mascara must be a mess. "I'll be out in a sec." Which I'm not.A few minutes later there is another knock."Kaitlin, are you alright?"It's Dylan. I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes again. Hearing Dylan's voice makes me feel more guilty. "Not really.""Could you open the door then so we can sort it out together?"I open the door slowly. I wrap my arms around my waist, trying to warm up my bare arms in the blaring air-conditioning. I know I look a little silly perched on the lip of a toilet like I am."Kaitlin, it's okay," Dylan says. "I know.""Know what?" I sniffle.He smiles. "Us blokes aren't stupid. I know you had a row with Austin. One of the stagehands overheard you so I knew what you were up to. That's the real reason you asked me out on a date, isn't it?""You knew?" I stop crying and look up at him. "Then why'd you agree to go out with me?""You can't blame a guy for trying." Dylan winks.I start crying again. "You must think I'm the worst person in the world."Dylan walks into the stall and puts his arms around me.I lean into him and continue to sob. "You've been such a good friend to me all summer and this is how I treat you. You're funny and smart and cute, and any girl would be lucky to have you. But that girl isn't me, Dylan. I'm happy with my boyfriend. I really care about him and I was just trying to make him and Riley jealous. I'm so sorry I treated you like a piece of meat."Dylan chuckles. "There, there. I don't think you're horrid. And well, maybe there was a small bit of me that wanted to get back at Riley too. She dumped me for a complete tosser.""So you were using me to make her jealous too?" I ask, amused.Dylan laughs. "Well, bits and bobs I guess. I do like you, but I miss Riley, even if her behavior toward you on this run has been incorrigible."How could Dylan like her? I guess everyone has different tastes.My snakeskin bag hangs off my shoulder and I feel for my phone self-consciously, hoping it will ring on command. Of course, it doesn't. I have to talk to Austin. Now. Right now. I can't wait another minute. I'll keep calling till he picks up. He has to pick up."Dylan?" I ask. "Would you hate me if I told you I had to leave?"He grins. "I'd be surprised if you didn't. Tell your partner I said hi. You'll reach him on his mobile eventually. Either that or you'll have to hop on the next plane to see him."Go to Texas!Why didn't I think of that?I give him a kiss on his cheek. "Dylan, you're brilliant. I'll see you at the theater."I rush out of the bathroom, through the restaurant, and out to the street. I stick my hand out into oncoming traffic and wave wildly for a cab. I've got a plane ticket to buy.* * *Twenty-five minutes later I burst through our apartment front door with a well-thought out, extremely rational plan of action. Okay, originally it was my Plan B. Plan A was reaching Austin by phone, but he's still not answering."911!" I yell. I can yell all I want because Mom and Dad are in the Hamptons again. "Nadine! Liz! PACK YOUR BAGS! Guys? WHERE ARE YOU GUYS? GUYS!"Nadine and Liz come flying out of their rooms at the same time, doors slamming behind them. Matty opens his door too, his sleep mask still over his eyes. He's wearing a Scooby T-shirt. Figures. A fourth door opens and I realize it's the bathroom. A huge cloud of steam precedes Sky, who has my monogrammed towel wrapped around her head. She's also wearing my pink robe."What are you jabbering about?" Sky is a total grouch."What are you doing here?" I ask, so surprised that for a moment I forget all about my master plan."They ran out of hot water at the hotel." Sky pulls my robe tightly around her small waist. "They weren't getting it back for at least an hour. Can you imagine? I couldn't wait that long so I called here and Liz said you were out with that cute British costar. What were you thinking?"I'm not sure what to comment on first--the fact that Liz said Sky could use our shower or about the fact I was out with Dylan. I look at Liz and she sort of shrugs. She's trying and that's all friends can really ask friends to do."I know I shouldn't have gone out with Dylan." I sigh. "I screwed up. I was trying to make Austin jealous.""Did it work?" Sky wants to know."He's not returning my calls." I stare at the hardwood floor and feel like I could be swallowed up by it at any moment."Shocker." Matty shuffles toward us. He's taken off his eye mask and it hangs on his forehead. His blond hair sticks up all over. "You think you girls are the only ones who can play games. We know how to play them too, you know. Want to mess with our hearts? We'll mess with yours right back. Austin isn't taking your calls, Kates, because you ticked him off. ""I kind of figured that." I sink into the nearest leather couch. It needs cushier pillows that you can wrap your arms around and cry into. Since I don't have any, I tell the gang what transpired last night before and after the show and today."I hate De-Manda!" Sky declares."Me too!" Liz seconds. "The nerve of her, not to give Austin the phone!""He didn't take the phone," Matty clarifies, but we ignore him."She has been making a play for your man and I don't tolerate that sort of thing," Sky adds. It's hard to take her businesslike tone seriously when she's all wrapped up in plush terry cloth."Agreed." Liz is equally outraged and she plops down next to me, her black satin bow-detail 7 for All Mankind halter top billowing around her. It's such a cute top and it looks great with those cut-off Paper Denim capris. Wait, I think those are mine. "She needs to be dealt with," Liz adds.I shake my head. "No, it's not De-Manda I should be worried about. It's Austin. I've pushed him into her arms and now he's going to break up with me!"Liz touches my hand, her cool silver bangle hitting my fingers. "Don't say that.""Why wouldn't he?" I wonder aloud. "We have never had such a big fight before. We've had such a hard time syncing schedules and we've been getting so mad at each other. I guess things just spiraled out of control." I sink lower into the couch remembering it all. "I started spending all this time with Dylan and he was here and great and I guess a small part of me liked the attention and then I wasn't giving Austin or his lacrosse camp any attention..." I bite my lip. "Do you think I'm a horrible person?""No." Nadine shakes her head, practical as always. "You're human! And you're not a bad person for finding someone else cute. That's normal. There's not a day that goes by in Los Angeles that I don't marvel at some hot guy's body. But that doesn't mean I pounce on them.""Trev and I have a simple understanding." Sky is referring to our former FA costar who she's been seeing on and off. "Flirting is okay, but anything beyond that is not. Trev knows that men find me irresistible. I can't help it."Liz snorts and Sky glares at her. "Sorry.""You made a mistake," Nadine tells me. "You got caught up in the play, and hanging out with Dylan, and being in New York." She smiles wryly. "This city has a way of changing people. But you didn't do any of it on purpose and you don't want to break up with Austin, so don't!"I moan. "How do I stop him from breaking things off?""You've got to reach Austin and explain things." Liz is absentmindedly playing with her tight corkscrews while she thinks. "This is totally fixable. This isn't as big of a deal as you think.""It wouldn't be if we were both in Los Angeles"--I point out the obvious--"but we're not. I'm in New York and he's in Texas. You can't have a heart-to-heart with someone who is not in the same zipcode! It's just not the same on the phone.""Text him!" Liz says."No! Send him a Twitter shout-out," Sky suggests.Everyone groans. HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER FOURTEEN: Sky may do her own Twittering, but not all celebrities do. Some of them are so eager to get in on the ego-obsessed Twitter craziness that they have their personal assistants handle their accounts for them. Are you really surprised? Even some stars' "official website" blogs are handled by outsiders who are paid to write their daily entries for them."I'm not about the PDA," I remind them. "And besides, I highly doubt a Twitter shout-out will help things." Liz smirks. "Neither will a text." Now Sky grunts. "I'm not texting and I'm not calling him again." I dig my phone out of my bag and look at the blank screen. "And he's obviously not calling me either. I'm done with technology on this issue. I think we all know what I need to do--go see Austin in person."A chorus of "What? How? Are you nuts?" follows that statement. Nadine starts rattling off a list of reasons why we can't go (Mom, Mom, and Mom)."Guys! Think about it." I hold my hands up pleadingly. "I perform tonight and then not again till Tuesday night. I can be there and back and no one has to know! Mom and Dad are away till Wednesday anyway. We can call them from the road.""Your mom said you couldn't visit Austin alone, remember?" Nadine reminds me.I smile slyly. "I'm not going alone. You guys are coming with me. Who is in?""I'll go," Matty offers first. "We haven't had any road trip time this whole summer and I'm leaving this weekend for work on my show.""As if anyone needs reminding that you have a slot on the fall schedule," Sky snaps. "I'm in too, K.""Me three." Liz raises her hand wildly. "But maybe we should keep this smallish, you know? I wouldn't want Austin to think he was being ambushed."Sky puts her hands on her hips. "Are you suggesting I stay home?""Austin doesn't know you," Liz points out. "Or should I say, he doesn't like what he knows of you. I don't think you'd be welcome.""Maybe that's the problem." Sky crosses her arms over her chest and juts out a hip. "It's not who is welcome, it's who would be best to help Kaitlin through this crisis. Kaitlin needs unbiased opinions here.""She needs her best friend's opinion." Liz takes a step toward Sky and I have the sudden fear that she's going to bust out some kickboxing moves."Guys, enough!" I referee. "This is getting old. I should have addressed this a while ago instead of tuning you both out." I take a deep breath and look at Nadine. She nods encouragingly. "You don't like each other. I get it."I look at Liz. "Sky hurt me, and that bothers you, and I love that you care so much, but I'm a big girl, and I think Sky and I have matured enough that we can handle being friends."Liz looks away and I turn to Sky, who is gloating at Liz. "Liz treats you miserably whenever you're around because she's my best friend and she watches my back. You can't stand her, Sky, because we're so close, but that is never going to change." Sky opens her mouth to protest, but I cut her off. "I have room in my life for more than one friend. Not everything has to be a competition."Nadine is grinning so I must be doing well. "I wish you two could get along because I think we'd have a lot of fun together, but I know it's not fair for me to put that on you guys. We'll keep things separate from now on. But this, today, is about me and Austin and right now I could use as much help as I can get. I need you both to get through this," I add quietly.Liz and Sky look at each other."Okay." Liz shrugs."Okay," Sky agrees reluctantly."Good." I breathe a sigh of relief. "Now we have to take care of the getting there part. Nadine?""Already on it." Nadine looks up from her laptop. "But there's a problem. You'll miss the last flight of the night to Texas by two hours. You can't get on a plane till close to midnight. And tomorrow the first flight out is a connecting and you wouldn't get in till like one PM. I should add, the ticket prices are astronomical at this late date.""I don't care," I tell her. "I'll work off my credit card bill again. I need to see Austin right away. I can't wait till tomorrow! There aren't any other airlines?"Nadine shakes her head. "I'm checking, but there's not much on here that would work and get you back in time on Tuesday for the show.""Maybe you should go private," Sky suggests."Ooh! Good idea!" I look hopefully at Nadine."She cannot go private!" Nadine scolds. "We don't have twenty-five thousand dollars to throw away on a private flight to Texas. We already spent a fortune on gas for that helicopter ride. Her mother would fire me if we booked a Lear jet.""I can't have that." I sigh. "Private is out.""There is another flight that could get you in at twelve PM tomorrow," Nadine says thoughtfully. "They only have two seats left. That won't work. Oh! This one might be good, but the connection is too tight. Hmm... the problem is the airport closest to Austin's campus is not the major one and there aren't many flights."We sit quietly a few minutes, waiting for Nadine to work her magic like she always does. But this time she looks up glumly and says, "Kaitlin, this isn't going to work.""Okay." My eyes well up with tears. "I'll keep calling him. I guess." I start to cry again. "I'm sorry. It's just I'm so worried Austin and I are going to break up over this. I have to see him and explain things. This can't wait.""Go private," Sky urges again."Sky, it's not an option." Nadine is completely stern on this point."Unless..." Liz looks at Sky strangely."Liz, don't you start too!" Nadine is aghast at Liz's mutinous look."Unless what?" I look from Liz to Sky."We could." Sky, cracks a smile. "I never have before.""I haven't," Liz says. "Have you?""I just said I haven't!" Sky snaps."Fine. Let's do it," Liz turns to me and grins. "We're going private!""How?" Nadine and I say at the same time."Courtesy of Kaitlin's entertainment law firm," Liz says smugly. Sky clears her throat. "Despite our dads, fallingout, they kept joint use of the company private jet.""In this economy, it's smart to be frugal," Sky adds and Nadine bursts out laughing. "Nadine, sharing a jet is cost-effective.""Whatever you say." Nadine shakes her head."Our dads have enough pull that we could get a jet this afternoon and have it ready to fly out tonight," Liz continues."Guys, we can't bill this back to the firms," I tell them. "I appreciate it, but I'd feel awful.""We're not billing it back, per se," Sky explains. "Daddy was having the jet come get me to bring me back to Los Angeles anyway. I'll fly commercial and use the trip for this instead.""Same here," Liz seconds. "Dad would have flown me back on it after school, but I'll fly back commercial with you. Kates, let's take the jet. We'll leave tonight.""Are you sure?" They nod. "You have no idea how much this means to me. Okay." I squeal. "We'll leave right after the show and I'll pay both of you back for your commercial tickets." I hug them."Guys, the closest airport is still two hours away from Austin's campus." Nadine is looking at MapQuest. "We'll have to rent a car.""Road trip back on!" Matty hollers."This is going to be fun!" Liz looks at me. "Once you and Austin talk things out, of course. I know you're not going to break up. You can't!""I hope you're right," I tell her, my heart pounding at the thought of seeing Austin in just a few hours. We can't break up. We just can't. I look around the room. Liz, Sky, Nadine, Matty, and I'm sure Rodney will come too. There is no one else I'd rather have in my corner for this.Nadine is already on the phone with a rent-a-car place in Texas. "You guys okay with a Taurus?""Eww. No. No compact cars." Sky makes a face. "Try for an Escalade.""What's wrong with a Taurus? God, you're so superficial!" Liz tells her and the two start to bicker again.Okay, maybe this won't be a fun trip, but I don't care. The goal is to find Austin and make things right. And I will.Sunday, July 19thNOTE TO SELF:Have N pack 4 trip.Apologize 2 Riley.Jet leaves at 11:30 PM from Newark.celebrity insider onlinehome news photos sound bitesBREAKING NEWSOnline Exclusive: Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie Urge the Media to Help Stop the Feud Madness!Speaking by phone to Celebrity Insider Online, Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie (aka SKAT) made a public plea to squash the escalating war of words between them and socialities/reality TV stars Ava Hayden and Lauren Cobb (aka LAVA)."We are sick of the drama," said Kaitlin, who claimed she was calling from her New York City apartment (although we heard airplanes taking off in the background). "Sky and I are tired of the back-and-forth between the so-called Team Sky and Kaitlin and Team Ava and Lauren. We just want this whole fight to end," Kaitlin added. "It doesn't matter who started it or why it started. We want the negative energy to go away. No one can win this. We're going to continue to hurt each other. Why? Because we don't get along? We don't have to get along. We can stay out of each other's space and live our lives. That's what I intend to do. I've been doing a lot of thinking and I realize now that nothing good comes of being vengeful and hurtful. You're better off letting some things slide and this is one of them. After tonight, Sky and I won't be answering any more questions about Lauren and Ava's behavior--no matter what they throw our way."This statement is in sharp contrast to another interview that was posted online just twenty-four hours ago by a less-reputable entertainment outlet. Kaitlin admits the quotes were hers, but says she wasn't thinking clearly at the time of the interview. "I had a rough night and I think I took things too far," she admits. "I apologize for being just as down-and-dirty as Lauren and Ava have been. I don't normally act that way and I regret my behavior. If my statements hurt anyone reading them, I apologize."Sky was in full agreement with her former Family Affair costar on the silent treatment Kaitlin is suggesting. "What good is going to come of this fight?" Sky asked. "Nothing. It's a way to get more headlines and public attention, and K and I are not the type to crave that. Those two keep doing more and more public displays of hatred to try to keep their fifteen minutes of fame going. Well, their fifteen minutes are over because we are not firing back anymore."Sky was Tweeting while she spoke, saying she was "hoping to get my last two cents in before we shut down this whole discussion completely!" Her Tweets during the midnight hour included: "LET THE HATERS CONTINUE TO HATE. WE ARE OUT OF THIS!" And: "LAVA knows what they've done and they've got to live with that. This star refuses to be dimmed by their callousness." Our favorite: "LAVA, you will not get any more press out of us. We've got bigger fish to fry, you guppies. Go back to the small pond where you belong."Hearing SKAT on the same page had this reporter wondering: Are the former frenemies now just plain friends? Both skirted around the issue, with Sky even asking, "How did K respond to that question?" But there is one important thing to note: They were together, late at night, somewhere loud (airplanes!), going somewhere else together. Isn't that the sort of thing friends do? Sky laughed when CIO suggested that, but she wasn't so quick to laugh off our question about rumors that the pair could work together again on a fall pilot. "I can't comment on that, but you know you'd love it if we would." Kaitlin was equally coy. "If that's true, I'd be pretty lucky," she said, as Sky chided her in the background. "If there's one thing I can say about Sky, it's that at least with her, I know where I stand. With Lauren and Ava I never did. Wait. That was sort of a dig, wasn't it?" she said with a laugh. "I take that back! I'm done hurling insults. Insulting people is not what I'm about. New York was my summer to try new things and I have, but the important thing is not to forget who I was before," Kaitlin added. "I realize that now and that's why I'm stopping this feud craziness. Hopefully Celebrity Insider will help us too."So what do you think? Should we stop the Team SKAT and Team LAVA coverage? Tweet your thoughts to @celebinsider.FIFTEEN: Texas or Bust"The snack machine had Chex mix!" Sky looks happy as she bounds onto the hotel room bed, shaking the frame and causing Liz to almost spill her Sprite all over her nightshirt. I brace for the impact. "Oh, God, so sorry, Lizzie!" Sky races to her half of the bed in way-too-short black pajama shorts and a pink bedazzled tank that says TEAM SKAT. "Did you get wet? You can wear my new green tank I got at Topshop if you did."It's amazing what can happen when you spend a six-hour plane flight and car ride with people you normally dislike. Maybe instead of sending a message to Lauren and Ava via Celebinsider.com, we should have asked them to come to Texas with us. It's done wonders for Liz and Sky. Somewhere over Tennessee they bonded over their love of Ryan Reynolds and started trading their favorite movie lines. By the time we crossed the Texas border, Sky had agreed to star in Liz's final class project--a five-minute video that she has to write and shoot within a week."Look, it's just a little drip," Liz tells Sky, pointing at her kickboxing T-shirt. "No biggie."No biggie? Ha! If I had done that to her favorite shirt, she would have squirted her Sprite back at me. I give her a look."Chex?" Sky holds out the bag for me and winks."No, thanks." All I want is get a little sleep before I see Austin. I wanted to show up at his dorm room tonight when we got in, but Nadine said that arriving at his dorm at five AM might cause a small commotion. So instead we checked into the nearest hotel ("A Doubletree?" Sky scowled. "Eww.") and everyone made me agree to set the alarm clock for ten AM so that I didn't show up "with huge bags under your eyes and a major zit." (Liz. Sky laughed though.) The only room they had left was a two-bedroom suite in a full-on Texas motif so Nadine and I are bunking together and Liz and Sky are in the other bed. Matty and Rodney are already snoring in the other room, but I can't sleep."K, if you don't shut your eyes soon, you're going to have a meltdown, and I really don't want to take you to a hospital in Texas." Sky shudders."Enough breakdown talk." I sigh. I hug my way-too-fluffy pillow to my chest and lean back against the wood headboard. I pull my custom Ahsoka Tano shirt that Austin had made for me over my mouth. "I'm already"--yawn--"freaked out enough as it is.""Kates, you know Austin is totally going to forgive you once he sees you." Liz smiles. "I called Josh earlier and he didn't even mention you two having a fight. If it was major, he would have told Josh. And if he told Josh, Josh would have told me."I stare at the picture of the cattle ranch on the far wall, not sure if I buy her logic. "I keep trying to rehearse what I'm going to say to Austin, but the words get all tangled up. I don't know where to start.""Just make out with him." Sky shrugs. "That always works for me. Then they forget why you were fighting in the first place.""On that inspiring note, it's time to sleep," Nadine says. She leans over and turns off the light next to me. Sky turns over and flips off the light next to her bed as well. It's dark, but I can already see the sky lightening between the cracks of the window curtains."Guys?" I ask through the blackness as my eyelids get heavier. The only thing I can hear is the whir of the air-conditioning unit in the wall and Nadine twisting and turning next to me. It feels like the safest time to admit my darkest fear. "What if all this bickering and all the missed phone calls are a sign of a bigger problem? What if Austin likes De-Manda?""You deal with that road if you come to it, which I don't think you will." Liz sounds so calm that I'm jealous."But what if we break up?" I almost whisper."If that happens, then I'll be there for you." Liz's voice is strong and reassuring."We'll be there for you," Sky corrects, which makes me a little teary. But I'm too tired to cry."We'll all be there for you," Liz amends."You're not alone, Kaitin." Nadine is not asleep yet either, apparently. "We've got your back. That's what friends are for."And that's the last thing I remember hearing before I fall asleep.* * *The next thing I remember is my alarm going off at ten AM. Sky hits the snooze three times and then Liz says she's changing the wake-up time to eleven since we don't have a specific time we're meeting Austin anyway. I think about fighting her, but I'm too tired and a little worried that Liz might be right about the under-eye circles. By eleven-thirty we're all up. Nadine's BlackBerry keeps going off and to keep her from hurling it against the wall, I read the latest message to her then immediately regret doing so. It's Mom asking where we are. She had called the apartment twice and gotten no answer. Nadine jumps up to call her from the closet and warns the rest of us to keep our voices down. While Matty and Sky take showers in the two separate bathrooms, and Liz watches The View, I check my phone. For some reason it's off, even though I don't remember turning it off. As soon as it powers up, I see the text. It was sent at eight-thirty this morning.AUSTIN'S CELL: Tried calling all night, but no answer. Call me, okay? We need 2 talk."Guys, Austin texted me!" I scream."Let me see!" Liz jumps up and reads the text. "He tried calling? When?""I know I had my phone on all night, but it was just off. " We stare at the screen as the low-battery light blinks menacingly and the phone shuts off again. Liz smacks me in the shoulder."Kates, you forgot to charge your phone? You know how quickly iPhones run out of juice!" Liz reprimands and places her hands on her low-rise Juicy Couture cropped denim jeans (she's paired them with the cutest Alice & Oliva yellow silk ruffle camisole). I don't know how I can be thinking about clothes at a time like this. "Austin could have been calling you since we were in New York! When was the last time you looked at your phone?"I bite my lip. "I don't know." She looks at me. "I was checking during the show last night, but then I guess I got so wrapped up in leaving for Texas I threw my phone in my bag and forgot about it. Don't tell Nadine," I beg loudly and scramble in my bag for the phone charger. When I find it, I quickly plug the phone in to charge. It's completely dead now.Nadine rushes out of the closet she was in and shushes me angrily and then points to her phone. She's already dressed too (a pale blue Gap V-neck empire top and her favorite white Ann Taylor Loft cargo shorts). I'm the only one procrastinating."I am trying to not let on that we're out of state," Nadine hisses. "I'm trying to throw her off by changing the subject. I told her you have an appointment at the DMV in Los Angeles the week we get back from New York.""Good one," I tell Nadine.HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER FIFTEEN: Getting my license isn't really a secret, I know. I've been trying to get it forever and I really am taking the test when I go home at the end of the summer, but how celebrities deal with things like the DMV is sort of a juicy tidbit. Ever wonder why you never bump into Kim Kardashian renewing her license? That's because she probably never waits in line. Certain places, like the DMV in Hollywood or Beverly Hills, have a side entrance, and from time to time they let celebrities use it. You could say it's getting us out of the two-hour line, but the DMV sees it as helping them as well. If a star causes a commotion in line, that would be a lot harder to take care of than letting us cut to the front of the line to get new license plates.I reread Austin's text twice. "Him texting me has to be a good sign, right? He didn't say anything about the message I left him saying I didn't want to break up. Do you think that means he does want to break up? And then there's this 'We need to talk' part. That can't be good, can it?""Oh, God, get in the shower already so we can get you over there and shut you up," Sky barks, as she walks out of the bathroom in an olive green polka dot Walter dress. I'll forgive her attitude because I know she's cranky from the lack of eight hours sleep.Matty emerges and I do as I'm told. By one-thirty we're out the door and Rodney is driving the rental minivan to Austin's camp, the Longhorn Lacrosse Clinic, which is held at a local college. I was so nervous about the trip that I didn't give a lot of consideration to what I'd be wearing for my big confrontation with Austin. Luckily I was able to cobble a decent outfit together from Sky's, Liz's, and my stuff. I have on Sky's white Marc by Marc Jacobs cotton chambray pleated top and Liz's royal blue Leanne Marshall linen ruffle skirt. Around my neck is the necklace Austin gave me last Christmas.I realize when we pull up to campus that I have no clue what dorm Austin is in and there are four. Then Nadine remembers that I sent Austin a care package the first week I arrived in New York--I haven't sent one since. Gulp. She finds the address on her BlackBerry and pulls up the dorm name. We get inside, thanks to a girl who recognizes Sky and me, and make it to Austin's room, but there's no answer. The whole floor is deserted."Um, guys? It's midday, there's no one here, and this is a lacrosse camp," Matty says. "Want to take a guess where they might be?""The lacrosse fields?" Rodney is hopeful."Austin told me they didn't play during the heat of the day," I tell the others."That girl said they were on a different schedule this week," Liz points out. "Maybe they're playing. It's worth a shot, no?""Let's go." I take off ahead of the group. I can't wait another minute to see Austin.We don't have to go far to find the fields, which are swarming with players in blue and yellow pinnies."How did we miss this?" Liz marvels as we hurry across the grass. The heat is brutal here. I'm sweating already and we've only been outside for a few minutes. I can't imagine why they'd practice in this. Austin said they usually worked out in the morning and late afternoon, but it's almost two and they are all on the field. The question is, with so many guys and girls running around, how am I going to find Austin?"Hey, aren't you Sky Mackenzie?" A guy with sweaty tousled brown hair leans on his lacrosse stick and stares straight into Sky's eyes. She smiles and sashays her olive green dress side to side."Yes I am. Hi, cowboy," she purrs.Liz laughs. "What makes you think he's a cowboy?""We're in Texas," Sky points out."This is camp, he could be from anywhere!" Liz is incredulous."Do something before they start rolling on the grass throwing punches," Nadine suggests as the two continue to yell at each other. The boy looks on curiously. The girls are actually starting to draw a crowd."Hi there," I say, smiling brightly.And then before I can say anything else, he points at me. "Burke! You're Kaitlin Burke!""Yes, I am.""What are you doing here?" he asks as more people jog over."I'm looking for someone, actually," I tell him as I smile at all the newcomers. "I don't know if he's out here though. He told me his group doesn't usually play during the early afternoon."The guy nods. "None of us do. It rained all last week so we had to do it today to make up for some lost scrimmage time."That means Austin is out here somewhere. I scan the fields again, wishing I could spot him. "Do any of you know Austin Meyers?" I ask.The guy motions to someone behind him. "I think she's on the same floor as him." A girl with a long brown ponytail, long side swept bangs, and legs that are longer than Heidi Klum's strolls over. She isn't wearing any makeup, and she's super sweaty, but her tanned skin is flawless and she has the most gorgeous gray eyes. I don't even have to ask who she is."Amanda, right?" I ask. Liz and Sky stop fighting and look up."Yeah." Amanda looks from my yellow print Coach sandals up to my clean pink manicure and snakeskin bag. Before I can stop myself, I notice her chipped short red nails. She quickly drops her hands to her side and sort of hides them behind her back.I immediately feel guilty. It isn't hard to tell that Amanda, as beautiful as she is, feels unsure of herself now that the girl she's been toying with is standing right in front of her. And movie star or no movie star, this is a girl-to-girl problem."That's the girl?" Sky is loud on purpose. "Deck her."Amanda shifts slightly and I watch as she keeps pushing her bangs nervously behind her ears. Everyone is looking at us, even though I highly doubt anyone but me and Amanda knows what is going on. But I know. And so does Amanda.We could go two ways with this. We could scream at each other and make nasty put-downs, both trying to one-up each other for Austin. Or I could rip into her and make her feel insignificant like Lauren and Ava have done to me and Sky all summer, and we did to them on SNL, but where did that get us? Nowhere. Where did being mean to Riley get me? It hasn't made her any nicer to me or convinced her I can handle the stage. After everything that has gone down this summer, I finally realize one thing: You really do get more bees with honey. It's time to act mature.As much as it kills me, I hold out my hand and smile. "Hi, I'm Kaitlin." I keep my tone pleasant and Sky gasps. "It's nice to finally meet you.""What is she doing?" Sky hisses and I notice Liz start to drag her away. "She should punch her!"Amanda slowly extends her own sweaty hand. "Amanda." Her voice is soft. She does, however, look slightly relieved.And I am too. Yes, she's been catty and rude to me more than once, but she also obviously thinks my boyfriend is a hottie, and who can blame her for that one? "I'm looking for Austin. Do you know where he is?""He's on the other field." Amanda points in the direction with her stick. "I can take you, if you want.""That would be great." I follow her through the crowd, leaving the others behind. I look back anxiously and I see Nadine's face. She actually looks proud. I guess I know how she would handle this situation too.Amanda and I sort of walk in silence, sticking to a few occasional sentences that are sure not to cause any problems like, "Wow, it's hot here" and "How was your trip to Texas?" Way too soon, or not soon enough, depending on the scattered thoughts racing through my mind, we are at the field and Amanda is pointing Austin out to me. Austin is in full-on lacrosse mode. I can barely make out his face under his helmet, but I know his number, and I keep my eyes on him as Amanda points out other teammates and talks about the scouts that have already come by in the last week."He's really good," she says to me."I know." I stop when I realize that sounds kind of territorial, even though I don't mean to be. "I mean, I've seen him play at home.""Right"--she shrugs--"you would, being his girlfriend and all."I was a few days ago.God, I hope I still am.I hear a whistle and then guys and girls start streaming off the field. I see Austin take off his helmet and shake out his wet hair. He is tanner than I've ever seen him and his shirt is so drenched that it clings to the six-pack he seems to have developed since he's been here. He is dirty and sweaty and yet all I want to do is break away from Amanda and throw myself at him. But I restrain myself for the ten seconds, at least, it takes for him to get to the sidelines."Austin!" I call his name hoarsely when I can't take it anymore.He turns slowly and sees me. At first he looks sort of confused, then he breaks into a huge smile and then his face goes sort of blank, which is really confusing."What are you doing here?" he asks as he walks straight toward me and stands inches from my face.It takes all my willpower not to reach forward and kiss him. But I'm too scared. What if Austin doesn't want to kiss me anymore? Part of me doesn't even feel like I deserve him after the way I behaved this summer and if I feel that way there is a chance Austin is thinking the same thing.Forget waiting for news on Small Fish, Big Pond, or my reviews on Broadway. Knowing what Austin is thinking about me being here and what he thinks about the future of us is scarier than anything else going on in my life. I don't want this to be over. Seeing Austin again, right in front of me, I know more than ever what I want, and it's him, and I'm praying he'll give me another shot."I came to see you," I say even though I guess that part is obvious. I look at Amanda. "Amanda told me where you were."He looks from me to Amanda and then his face flinches slightly. "She was very helpful," I add."I'll leave you two alone," Amanda says to me. "It was nice meeting you, Kaitlin.""You too," I tell her.Even though I know there are people watching us, all I can think about is Austin. A hot breeze blows between us and Austin's sweaty blond hair covers his eyes."I called you all night and you didn't answer," Austin starts to say. "I thought...""Me first," I insist. "I came to say I'm sorry." My voice is squeaky, but I won't cry. "For everything. You were right. I haven't been there for you and you're always there for me. I let my work get in the way and I didn't care about how my friendship with Dylan affected you. I've been a rotten girlfriend."Austin doesn't say anything at first. His face is scrunched up and he seems to be thinking of the words he wants to say. I'm breathless waiting to hear them. Are they good or bad?"I thought maybe you liked Dylan." Austin looks so pained. "And instead of telling me you didn't, you kept pushing the topic off the table.""I should have told you the truth about Dylan." The wind is still whipping and I push my hair off my face. "But I was afraid. We were so far apart and I thought if you knew Dylan was into me that would make you madder. We spent so little time on the phone as it was, I didn't want to spend it fighting.""I know." Austin's blue eyes are serious. "That's my fault. I should have called you more.""I should have called you more!" I interrupt, but Austin cuts me off."Let me talk, okay?" He sounds gruff, and it makes me nervous. "I should have called you when I said I would. It's not that I didn't want to talk to you, it's just..." He hesitates. "I hate the phone.""You what?" I'm confused."I hate the phone," Austin admits and his mouth starts to twitch. Is he going to smile? "Hate it. We never talk on it at home. I talk to you for five minutes or we text and then I see you so there's no need for technology to get in the way, but a lengthy phone conversation? I can't stand it. I should have told you that."He hates the phone. I wish he had told me that."It's no excuse though." Austin runs his dirty hands through his hair. "I should have made the effort. But then after the stuff with Dylan started happening, I got upset and then when you seemed worked up about Amanda answering our phone it made me think, 'now she knows how I feel.' I guess that's why I let you get all crazy about her."Austin was getting me back. I guess I deserved that."But I shouldn't have done that to you the other night," he admits. "I should have gotten back on the phone."My throat feels so dry, but I need to make this point clear. "I don't like Dylan. I swear I don't.""I don't like Amanda." Austin's blue eyes are so truthful, how could I not believe him?"So does that mean you still like me?" I try to joke, but my heart is aching. "I promise to be a better girlfriend if you'll let me. Do you think you can forgive me? I..." I look at him searchingly and feel the need to say this. "I love you."Austin starts to smile and I feel a rush of relief. "I love you too. You're the one I want to be with, Burke. And I promise to suck it up with the phone calls till you get home."He grabs my waist and pulls me toward him. I actually hold my breath, almost afraid it's not going to happen. But it does. Austin kisses me. I close my eyes and let the kiss take me away. His lips are soft--if a little chapped--and his kiss feels so nice and familiar. Most importantly, it reminds me of just how things should be and will be again.Monday, July 20NOTE TO SELF:Dinner with A, Rob, & the gang: Longhorn Steakhouse 6 PM.Flight home: 9 AM Tuesday.**Send A another care package! Pop Burger could B Good!MEETING OF THE MINDS con't.SCENE 14:Andie is cleaning out her locker. Leo walks up behind her and stops.LEO:Do you like sushi?ANDIE:(she looks up, surprised) I do like sushi.LEO:Good. Because I want to take you to this great sushi place. You'll love it.ANDIE:Are you asking me out on a date?LEO:I guess I kind of am. Is that okay? Or are you going to freak out again and wish you never told me anything?ANDIE:I'll be okay. But what about Jenny?LEO:I told you before, when you freaked out and ran off. Jenny knows we were over a long time ago. It's time to move on. Everyone has to. All we've got is the future, you know?ANDIE:You can't forget the past.LEO:No, but you can learn from it and make the future even better, don't you think?ANDIE:I do. At least I hope that's the way it works.(Leo grabs Andie's stuff and puts it into her backpack. Then he offers her his hand.)LEO:Want to go?ANDIE:I don't know. This is it, isn't it? The last time here, at this locker, in this place. It's kind of scary.LEO:Yeah, it is. But it sort of isn't. It's sort of exciting. (Andie laughs.) What's so funny?ANDIE:I was just thinking that this is my last ever day here and I'm walking out of school with the one boy I always wanted to walk into school with.LEO:Then let's take the long way out, and check things out one last time.ANDIE:Works for me.(Andie and Leo walk toward the back of the stage together and the stage fades to black.)THE ENDSIXTEEN: Back to the Future"Kaitlin, they're waiting for you!" The stage manager knocks on my door."Got it!" I yell back, checking my reflection in the mirror before making my way backstage in my jeans and T-shirt combo for the last time.It's been three weeks since I visited Austin in, well, Austin, and the rest of my stint in the play and in New York has been blissfully smooth. I think I've finally gotten the hang of this stage thing, and even though Riley won't give me credit for it, I know I'm improving. She's not even offering me her opinion anymore. Even if she did, I wouldn't listen. I know I tackled something big, new, and scary and I survived. The same thing goes for me and Austin. Everyone else is doing okay too. Liz finished her writing and directing clinic and got an A-minus on her final project, the one starring Sky. Even better, they didn't kill each other doing it! They've sort of taken over the frenemies title that Sky and I used to share. Sky stayed in New York, as promised. She says it was to take meetings, but I know it was to hang with me and Liz. And Liz was surprisingly okay with that. The only ones not still okay with that are my mom and Laney. But we're about to change that."Ready?" Sky meets me in the backstage hallway. She's obviously not in costume for a final night's performance so she looks much more appropriate for an audition than I do. Her raven hair is ironed straight and has grown a bit since the start of the summer, almost hitting her mid-back, which is bare thanks to the Versace dress she has on. The green floral print is a bit dizzying, but Sky says she's hoping it puts the people we're meeting with in a complete trance.I grab Sky's hand. "Are you sure you're ready for this? I mean, we've talked about it, but we haven't really talked about it."Sky sighs. "K...""This is a big deal and we both keep skirting around the major issues. You say you like the pilot. You like the character. You like the character I would be playing, but you haven't said whether you think we can survive doing this together. This is a huge deal, Sky.""K...," Sky tries again."Are we sure we want to go down this road again?" I ask. "What if my mom and Laney are right? What if we get on set and two days in we are back to hating each other again? What if our comic chemistry on SNL was a total fluke? What if we don't have the chops to do comedy? Or we stink in front of a live audience? What if the show bombs after three episodes and we're to blame? What if--""K!" Sky yells and starts shaking me by the shoulders. "SHUT UP!""Okay." I'm slightly horrified. She's never this loud."I'm in, okay?" She straightens the skirt of her dress. "That's obvious, no? If neither of us wanted to do this, we wouldn't have taken it this far. We wouldn't be meeting with them tonight, two hours before you're doing your last performance in the play, to actually run through some scenes for the pilot. We wouldn't have our agents fly in and finesse the details of the deal. We wouldn't take phone call after phone call with the producers, the director, the network, and the casting folks assuring them that we could work together again peacefully." Sky flips her raven hair. "And I wouldn't have wasted the last two weeks working on the pilot with you when I could have been enjoying the Hamptons with your mom, who despite her dislike of me, actually appreciates my help with the Darling Daisies." Sky smiles wryly. "K, you may drive me nuts, but there is no one I'd rather be driven nuts by."I grin. "Me either, as bizarre as that sounds.""We should do this," Sky insists, and squeezes my hand. "It's a great pilot.""And awesome characters," I add. "A cool director.""A nice cast." Sky fills in the details. "Cool network, great perks, nice media coverage, good press. Good parking space, not that you have a car to park."I give her a smarting look. "But the best part, in case you forgot, is that we'd be back on TV again.""We'd be back on TV again." Sky smirks. "I thought that part was obvious. Seriously, K, sometimes I wonder where your head is."I hit her and her bony arm makes a light smacking sound. "We'd be doing what we love again--even if the show is only short-term and bombs--we'd be back on a set every day. I thought I had to get away from the daily grind to figure out what I wanted to do, but doing this play made me realize that what I wanted to do was in front of me the entire time. I like being on TV. I'm good at it. Why do I have to transcend and be a movie star?""Sweetie, if only someone would say what you just said to Jennifer Aniston," Sky sympathizes. "It's good to know your strengths.""They're yours too, you know," I point out. "We work well shooting an episode every two weeks. Although I guess this would be every week now."HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER SIXTEEN: When you watch a sitcom and see in the credits the line: "shot in front of a live audience" that means the show really was taped in front of a live audience. But unlike the morning talk shows that air live in real time, these shows are taped live, but they aren't taped within actual time constraints. It could take hours to film a half-hour sitcom in front of a live audience. Sometimes they have to do scenes over and over from every angle. Sometimes they botch a take. Sometimes the audience laughter is (shhh...) dubbed in."Well, I do well no matter how often we shoot an episode." Sky sounds defensive. "You just bask in my glow." I raise my arm to hit her again. "Okay! You're talented too. Sort of. " She links arms with mine. "And I'll help you get even stronger as an actress. Comedy is my specialty. Didn't you see me on SNL? I killed.""Try to rein in the modesty when we talk to these guys, okay?" I deadpan.We make our way through the backstage area to the side door and then walk onto the street. Because it's so early, there is no crowd waiting to get into the play yet. Just people in the city walking by on their way home from work or to dinner or who knows where. That's the cool thing about New York City. People are always coming and going at all times of day and night so half the time I'm not recognized. I just blend right in.I'm going to miss it here, and our apartment, and how easy it is to get around, but it's time to get back to Los Angeles. Matty and Dad are already there, since Matty started taping Scooby, and every time they call, I get just the teensiest bit jealous when I hear one of them splashing in the pool.No one recognizes Sky and me as we walk a few blocks down to another building and through the revolving doors, then into the elevator and up two floors to the rehearsal space for Meeting of the Minds. Forest said we could use it for tonight's meeting with everyone from Small Fish, Big Pond. Or as they're calling it this week, Small Fries. (I like that name better.) Seth says this meeting is just a formality. So does Emmett Arrigan, Sky's agent. They claim that we've already gotten the job and they want to see us in person, ask a few questions, and watch us run a few lines. Since they were only flying in overnight and they need an answer by the weekend, I agreed to meet before tonight's performance. That's why I got ready early. I am sticking to my pledge of making every single show and being on time for all of them.I'm feeling pretty nervous as Sky and I walk the long corridor down to the conference room where we're meeting Seth and Emmett. And part of my nervousness has to do more with the fact that no one other than Seth, Rodney, Liz, Nadine, and Sky knows I'm here. Yep, I didn't tell Mom and Dad or Laney how far I've come with negotiations. I know they'll have to weigh in because I'm a minor, but I made Seth swear that he wouldn't say anything yet. He knows how much they're against me and Sky working together again. They'd FLIP if they knew what was going on tonight.SWOOSH!Before I know what's happening, two people jump in front of us and try to grab us, and Sky and I scream. Sky reaches inside her bag for pepper spray and I yell at the top of my lungs and start smacking the people with my snakeskin purse. If they damage the bag that has gotten me through my whole summer here in New York, I'm going to be furious."STOP HITTING US! KAITLIN, STOP! IT'S MOM AND LANEY!"Sky and I stop screaming. I drop my bag and gasp in horror. It is Mom and Laney and they're seriously disheveled. Mom's hair looks like a rat's nest. Her Prada sunglasses are crooked and her white fitted blazer is twisted sideways. Laney isn't better off. Her hair was pulled back, but now the low ponytail is a mess and falling out. Any second Sky will accidentally spray her pepper spray on Laney's pretty teal Prada sundress and I'll never hear the end of it. ("Reese and Jake just got me this!")"You scared us," I scold. "What are you two doing here?""I called them." Seth looks guilty as he appears around the corner and removes his shades. He must be sweltering in a navy blue Ralph Lauren suit. It's ninety degrees in the shade today and this is New York City! I know he wants to look professional, but still. "Kaitlin, they need to know what you're doing here or you'll never get this role. Your mom has to sign off. You're better off telling her now than later."Sky is cheerful. "I'm so glad my mom barely knows what I'm up to, let alone renders opinions.""This is what I'm talking about, missy!" Mom says to Sky, sounding more and more like an eighty-year-old Hamptonite. "You have no respect for authority or for my daughter. How can anyone expect me to allow you two to work together again? I don't like SKAT! You would hurt her again and I can't see that happen," Mom adds, sounding upset."Aww, Mom!" I throw my arms around her stiff frame. "You're actually worried about my well-being." This is a totally new feeling from the parental unit and I'm a little misty just thinking about it. "I appreciate your concern, really I do, but I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself. And this is a great show, Mom. Ask Seth. He'll tell you.""He already has." Mom sighs. She looks at Laney. "We read it and we both love it. So much so that we're convinced that it will only last two episodes.""It's too smart for teens," Laney seconds."Way to be supportive," Sky chides them."If you want to go for this, sweetie, I'd rather be on board than kept in the dark like that little recon trip you took a few weeks ago." Mom raises her right eyebrow."You know about Texas?" I squeak.Mom and Laney nod. "The photos of you and Sky boarding a private plane in the middle of a cornfield were all over TMZ along with the headline, 'SKAT GOES GLOBAL,' " Laney informs me. "You're lucky you made it back to New York on time. But I guess since you did, no harm done." She smiles thinly, which is big for her. "You've been relatively good all summer so I have no complaints." She looks at Sky. "I'll try not to have any about this new yet old working relationship either."I hug them both and squeal. I attempt to hug Sky too."Eww, get off!" Sky freaks out. "No personal affection, K. I hate that.""We should get in there," Seth cuts in. "They're waiting for us.""Go get 'em, Kate-Kate," Mom says encouragingly, and Laney winks. "We'll be waiting right here."I nod, and then with Seth and Sky beside me, I walk through the door and prepare to find out what my future holds.* * *Before I know it, the curtain is rising on my last ever performance of Meeting of the Minds. My biggest fear about tonight's show is that I won't be able to hold it together. I know I'm saying every line for the last time. It's a little like how I felt shooting the last episode of Family Affair, but obviously not nearly as intense since I couldn't care less if I ever see Riley again. The first act runs smoothly and the second is going really well too. Since this really is the end though, I feel like I have to make some sort of peace with Riley."Hey." We're in between scenes, in the quick-change area, and I tap Riley on the shoulder. "Thanks.""For what?" she asks, surprised. We haven't really been talking that much since I went out on my faux date with Dylan."For teaching me that I don't need compliments all the time to know I'm doing a good job." It's true. Riley may have thought I couldn't hack it, and my reviews may not have been the grade A I was hoping for, but they were decent, and I know I gave this my all. That, I've learned, can be enough.Then as much as it kills me, I pay her a compliment. "I know I'm nowhere near the theater actress you are, Riley, but I feel fortunate to have been given the opportunity to do this and work with someone like you. You're really good at what you do.""Thank you." Riley is stiff. "Good luck to you, Kaitlin.""Good luck to you too." I smile.Nadine said something to me the other day that made sense of everything that's been happening with Lauren, Ava, and Riley. Not everyone you meet is going to like you, and that's okay. But in the spirit of maturity, I feel the need to say one more thing to Riley, since one thing I didn't do is invite her to my after-party with my family and friends. (I have to have some dignity, you know.) The cast already had a cake for me backstage before the show, and I ordered food for everyone before the play last night from Pop Burger, which is this popular mini burger joint in New York City that has sent their burgers to everyone from Jay-Z to Justin Timberlake. Now the Meeting of the Minds cast can be added to the list. "Riley?" I try to stop her before she walks away. "I just wanted you to know, Dylan still cares about you."She turns around. "My private affairs are mine. I don't choose to air my grievances in the rags.""True, but I thought you'd want to know, " I say awkwardly. "In case he doesn't tell you himself. Dylan does still care."She almost smiles at me. Almost--and then she walks away without another word.The second act flies by and I savor my last curtain call. Forest presents me with flowers and makes me cry. The audience gives me a standing ovation, which means a lot considering who is in the front row--my entire family. Matty and Dad flew in for the night as a surprise, which I realized halfway through the first act. Liz and Sky are here with Seth, Laney, Nadine, and Rodney, who is actually tearing up a little. This is the first time he's sat through the whole show since he's always with me backstage. Tonight I insisted he watch from the audience and I guess this means he likes it.Austin is here too. He finished camp last week, but Mom flew him back in to New York as a present for me. I notice he's holding the most magnificent bouquet of peach roses. He whistles and he and Matty yell my name. I take one last bow and then the curtain falls.Backstage there is a lot of commotion and hugging and chatting. I hug Forest the longest, thanking him for all he's taught me over the last few months. (Who knew I could cry on stage like that, every night without fail?) I trade e-mails and phone numbers with a few of the girls in the chorus and take one last group photo with the cast, then sign a bunch of cast photos. I also gratefully accept one that they've all signed for me as a thank-you. It's going to hang proudly in my room at home.And then I say goodbye to Dylan. I see him standing there, still in costume, which is a T-shirt and jeans, just like mine, and he looks good. There's just something about that aloof stance of his that makes me sort of swoon. But as Liz says, I also swoon over Zac Efron and Robert Pattinson, and I'm not leaving Austin for them either. (Besides which, Vanessa would just kill me if I broke the friendship code and went near Zac!)Dylan grins. "Congrats on a good run, mate." He hugs me loosely and I hug him back. "We're going to miss you around here.""I'm going to miss you guys too," I admit, "but I don't think I'm going to miss the schedule. Working every night is grueling! Yes, having mornings off is fun, but I'd like to be home to catch 90210 this fall.""What is 90210?" Dylan asks."I'll forgive you because you're British." I laugh, but then I get sort of quiet. "Thanks, Dylan. For understanding about everything.""You're welcome." He smiles, showing off the small gap between his two front teeth. "You can't blame a guy for trying. You're quite a catch, Ms. Kaitlin Burke.""As are you," I say and kiss him on the cheek. "I guess I'll be seeing you. Call me if you ever come out to my coast, okay?""Will do."He touches my shoulder awkwardly. And then I'm off to party.* * *"TO KAITLIN!" The cheer goes up. We're at Babbo, Mario Batali's restaurant on Waverly Place. We've got a private area near the back and everyone is in a festive mood, including me. I've changed into my final New York City splurge, a Badgley Mischka black floral silk cocktail dress. It has a round neck and a scoop back and a darling rosette detail at the front waist."Thank you." I hold my champagne glass. (Mom said she'd vouch for me in the press that she gave her approval for a little glass of bubbly on this special occasion.) "I couldn't have made it through the summer without you guys." I look at Mom, Dad, and Matty. "The fact that you'd all relocate to New York so that I could try something like this still makes me a little misty. And that Seth and Laney thought I had it in me to tackle Broadway, makes me feel good because I know they always have my back. As do my friends." I look at Liz, Nadine, and Sky, who is actually smiling! "And to my boyfriend who stood by me despite everything I did to muck things up." Austin slips his hand into my free one under the table. "This has been an amazing summer. Now it's time to go home. ""We'll be back." Mom looks confident in her white BCBG dress with the black beaded trim around the waist. "I promised the Darling Daisies I'd check in from time to time. I'm even opening a branch in Los Angeles for them. Won't that be fab? We need some of that refined Hamptons spirit on the West Coast and I have more than enough time to run the organization for them. " Laney nods in agreement, but I'm not sure she's actually listening. She accessorized her black Donna Karan suit with two Bluetooths again. Something about a Heidi and Spencer issue. Apparently they ticked off Lauren and Ava, who have actually moved on to torturing them instead of Sky and me, which is perfect because those two already have a nickname for the press to use (Speidi). Yippee! I guess Nadine was right about the attention dying down if we just let the story go."You can come to New York as long as it works with Kaitlin's new shooting schedule," Seth is saying to Mom.Yep, I got the show!The producers echoed Seth's sentiment, that they were just in town as a formality and that they'd want nothing more than for Sky and me to star in the pilot and the show. They were still filling out the cast, but we would be the anchors. Sky and I signed on the spot.Small Fries, current title, will be starring Kaitlin Burke and Sky Mackenzie and will air this November. I'm back, baby! And I couldn't be happier. Seriously, I'm ready for five AM call times, long shooting days, and this new twist of being in front of a live audience for tapings. God knows, this summer I've had the practice."I can't believe we'll both be on the same soundstage." Matty is ecstatic and looks wise beyond his fifteen years in his black Armani suit. His summer tan has already faded thanks to all the hours he's logging on set. Oooh... I can't wait to get pale again too! "Kates, you're going to totally love the studio's cafeteria. They just made a new sandwich in my honor. You know, Scooby is getting lots of love.""Please, that's just until we arrive." Sky waves him away with one long hot pink fingernail. Her orange silk floral Laundry dress is just as playful as her current mood."Why isn't there room for you both?" Liz asks and the two are off and running again with their commentary. I think they like it that way."So you think you'll be able to handle these two and me full time when we get back?" Austin wants to know. Now that camp is over, Austin is letting his bangs grow out again, which is just how I like them. He's also back in full-on guy mode with his clothing, ditching the sweats and tanks for great-fitting pants and really nice silk button-down shirts, this one blue. (His sports jacket is lying on the chair next to us.) "Their friendship, which I'm still getting used to even wrapping my head around," Austin continues, "looks like it's going to take a lot of refereeing and I want to make sure that doesn't dig into my time with my girl.""It won't," I promise Austin. "If they need that much help, I'll have Rodney hire them a bouncer. I'm all yours when we get back next week.""Good, because once you get back to work, you're going to be pretty busy," Austin says. "I'll bet doing a new show is a lot of hours.""Yeah," I admit, thinking about that fact. I guess with everything happening so quickly that is the one thing I didn't anticipate. I want to work again and am prepared to, but those hours will probably be long. And I'll be back in the spotlight with the paparazzi, for sure. I guess SKAT is here to stay, which isn't such a bad thing. I wouldn't be surprised if the paparazzi camped outside the studio. Larry the Liar will definitely want a shot of me with my hair in curlers and no makeup. Eek.Austin interrupts my thoughts. "What's on your mind, Burke?""Oh, I was just thinking about our first Los Angeles outing." I wrap my fingers around his. I don't want to bring the mood down with my worries. I stare at him, wondering if he'll remember our promise to each other at the beginning of the summer. We said we'd return to Disneyland. It was just a casual promise, but I've clung to it the whole time we've been apart."Disneyland is a go," Austin says with a lopsided smile, which makes me grin even wider. "Nadine got us tickets a few weeks ago.""You remembered!" I marvel.He puts an arm around me. "Of course I did. Are you really surprised?""I guess not." I lean into his shoulder. "Disneyland it is. A week from Wednesday.""Can't wait." Austin kisses my cheek. "First ride definitely has to be Star Tours.""Definitely."I'm going home, and future craziness or not, I can't wait to get there.TO BE CONTINUED...Like your favorite TV show, we all take a summer hiatus (that's TV lingo for a well-needed short break from filming), but don't worry, I'll be back. I've got Small Fries to shoot and with a new TV show, new cast, new network, and a new character, comes a lot of hard work and, knowing me, some freak-outs. I know I'm ready for the challenge... or am I? Is TV where I really belong? Is Hollywood? Am I finally ready to embrace my inner Meryl Streep and declare acting my lifelong passion or will I watch Liz and Austin fill out their college applications and question my calling again? One thing is for sure, I've got to make a decision about my celebrity life and stick with it once and for all. This time it looks like fate is going to step in to help me make that choice by asking me to picture my life if it weren't set in Hollywood. Will I like that world better than my own? Or will I give anything to get back to my old life and the people in it? There's only one way to find out.Look for the final book in the Secrets of My Hollywood Life series, coming March 2011.AcknowledgmentsThe title alone--Secrets of My Hollywood Life--doesn't lend itself to a book set in New York, but my fabulous editors Cindy Eagan and Kate Sullivan were as pumped to see Kaitlin's Jimmy Choos click-clacking down Fifth Avenue as I was. This is just another reminder of how lucky I am to work with such amazing editors/cheerleaders. I also want to thank Kate S. for all her notes. Her crystal-clear view of New York helped Kaitlin's NYC feel all the more real.Thanks too to agent extraordinaire Laura Dail, who always has my back (as well as Kaitlin's) and to Tamar Rydzinski for going over all the little details.To the amazing team at Poppy and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers--Ames O'Neill, Melanie Chang, Andrew Smith, Lisa Ickowicz, Melanie Sanders, Elizabeth Eulberg, and Tracy Shaw (for yet another brilliant cover design)--it's because of you all that each new Secrets book is more buzz-worthy than the last.I'd also like to thank my family and friends for all they do to help me do what I love to do! (Got that straight?) Mara Reinstein is my first reader/critic/go-to girl on all things from Hollywood to Prada. My mom, Lynn Calonita, and mother-in-law, Gail Smith, make sure the boys are happy and healthy while I type away.Finally, to my husband, Mike, sons Tyler and Dylan, and Chihuahua, Jack--who are always waiting for me to shut off the computer--thank you for being the best support system a wife, mom, and author could have.LOVE SecreTs OF MY HOLLYWOOD LIFe?Jen Calonita takes you behind the scenes of stardom again with her newest novel,REALITY CHECKSixteen-year-olds Charlie, Keiran, Brooke, and Hallie have just been signed up for their own reality television show. They can't even believe it. "You'll be the new Hills," the Armani-suited executive tells them, "and the hottest thing on our network." How could they say no? But soon enough, cameras following them everywhere and interfering producers surreptitiously scripting their lives start to affect the four best friends' relationships. Charlie, Keiran, Brooke, and Hallie are about to learn a very important lesson: Friends don't let friends do reality shows.Keep your eye out for REALITY CHECK,Jen Calonita's newest look
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