The Wedding · A Family's Coming Out Story

Two people meet and fall in love. Over time, their relationship grows and they decide to spend the rest of their lives together. They plan a wedding, a formal binding into a permanent relationship with family and friends on hand as witnesses to solemn but beautiful vows. It's an occasion people dream about for most of their lives, though it is often joked that the wedding is more for the parents than the children.

But what if they're gay?

Andrew Merling was a graduate student in clinical psychology when he met Doug Wythe, a television promotion producer. Their relationship continued for three-and-a-half years before Doug formally proposed marriage to Andrew. Together, they agreed to have a traditional affair for family and friends.

While Doug was not as close to his extended family, Andrew came from a large, tight-knit Jewish family in Montreal. When he announced his engagement and the couple's plans for a traditional Jewish ceremony and a festive celebration, it was then that previously unacknowledged prejudices and hidden concerns suddenly reared their contentious heads.

Typical wedding conflicts over money and manners paled next to worries over whether Andrew's parents would find themselves ostracized by their conservative community. Then, just two months before the big day, the family had to decide if they were ready to perform the ultimate act of "coming out," when ABC-TV News asked to profile them as part of an episode of Turning Point, and bring national attention to their personal struggle.

The first book to speak to both sides of a controversy that is altering our society, this fascinating chronicle follows Doug, Andrew, and his parents Shedon and Roslyn on the rocky road from engagement to understanding. With the impending wedding as a catalyst, they embark on a painful, joyful odyssey of discovery, struggling both to be heard and to find acceptance from each other, their friends and communities. Their four distinct voices blend to create a unique depiction of one family coming to grips with the reality of being a gay couple in today's world.