[Fifty Shades of Neigh 02] • Fifty Shades Fatter - a Sequel

Catch up with Hanna ‘Mess of the D’Urbervilles’ Squeal and her jail-bird billionaire boyfriend, in the car crash romance that’s outselling niche historical novels with a total readership of about six.

Yes, the idiots are back, and they’re dumber than ever. Despite having voices in her head and a broken heart, the most illiterate English Major to ever train for the fast food industry has somehow landed a job in publishing. Sadly her estranged boyfriend is in the pokey for numerous copyright violations, attempted bribery and (surprisingly) not kidnap, prompting Hanna to spend much of her time sighing, crying and staring at her thumbs. Even worse, she has to fend off the moustachioed advances of her hipster boss Timothy Grope, who keeps sending her mysterious and threatening text messages – that is when he’s not drawing doodles of her tied to train-tracks.

But soon she is forced to make the biggest decision of her life when Crispian wants her back. (Spoiler - she says yes. She's an idiot after all.)

Thankfully (at least from the standpoint of dramatic tension) it's not a happy, rose strewn path to the altar when your fiancé is in federal custody, your friends are preoccupied with Kindle porn and cryptozoology and there's a strange girl who keeps climbing out of dumpsters to scream at you.

Really. It’s enough to make a girl crazy(er), and even with Crispian out on house arrest Hanna still has to find a wedding suit that adequately disguises the bulge of his electronic tag and suffer the horrified objections of her friends, her mother, his mother, her boss, her boss’s boss, the voices in her head and even Crispian’s annoying and suspiciously blonde, leggy, beautiful attorney. It’s almost as if getting married to someone you’ve known for less than a month is a catastrophically stupid idea…