A Bad Death · A DS McAvoy Short Story

Death and Taxes follows Mark Douglas, an ex-Marine turned IRS agent, who, along with auditing the weird and the profane, also goes out with his gang of government-sanctioned revenuers over weekends, merrily gathering back-taxes in the form of cash, trade or MILFs-with-their-robes-open barter.

Things turn ugly when Mark’s favorite boss and dearest friend Lila is tortured and killed over what she finds in a routine set of 1040 forms. Mark follows a trail dotted with plutonium-enriched cows, Saudi sheikhs with jewel-encrusted wieners (and we’re not talkin’ Oscar Mayer), edge-of-death ex-drug sniffing dogs named The Cabbage, overly-excited magicians who pull doves out of orifices that shouldn’t have doves pulled out from them, billionaire Texans with fetishes for barbecue-sauced ladies underthings, and even an FBI agent whose nickname is “Tightass.” All of which lead to more and bloodier murders.

With aid from his IRS pals—Harry Salt, a crazed thirty-year vet with a quantum physical ability to drink more than humanly possible; Wooly Bob, who’s anything but wooly, egg-bald on top with shaved eyebrows for effect; Miguel, an overly excited newbie, with a company-issued bullhorn and a penchant for getting kicked in the jumblies—Mark hunts down the eunuch hit man Juju Klondike and the mee krob snorting Mongolian mob that hired him as only an angry IRS agent can. There will be no refunds for any of them when April 15th comes around. There will only be Death and Taxes.