CONTENTS

  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. Prologue
  6. Milton’s Walk
  7. Lulu’s Room Sucks
  8. I Feel Like
  9. Ashley, Alabama
  10. The Progressive Student Alliance
  11. The Dix
  12. The Society of Fellingham
  13. Office Hours
  14. Gummy Bears
  15. Long Live the Queen!
  16. Trip Wires
  17. Everybody Go Deep
  18. Lulu Ubers to Manhattan
  19. Titus Cooley’s Office
  20. The Farmers’ Market
  21. The Hearing
  22. Friday at the PSA
  23. Friday, Eph’s Office
  24. The Brothers of Beta House
  25. The Beta Party
  26. The Morning After
  27. Winter Break
  28. Racist U
  29. Jack Russell
  30. Jaylen Doesn’t Heart Red
  31. Double Date
  32. Milton Gets Occupied
  33. Lulu Finds Out About Survivors
  34. Eph Gets a Visitor
  35. Stillman Weathers
  36. Busted
  37. The Steering Committee
  38. Drop the Mic
  39. Rusty’s Bar
  40. The Tarzan of Anderson House
  41. The Passion of Lulu
  42. The Story Breaks
  43. The Crawl: Day Ten
  44. Milton’s in a Bind
  45. The Summit
  46. Yeah, No
  47. Fucking Fucks
  48. The Tribunal
  49. The Internet Says So
  50. The Enemy of My Enemy
  51. Betas Are Boned
  52. Captain Jack
  53. Gherkins Are Small Pickles
  54. America’s Sweetheart
  55. It’s Only a Motion Away
  56. Screw Warhol
  57. The Fling
  58. Along Came a Phallus
  59. The Following September
  60. Moral Turpitude
  61. Where the Skies Are So Blue
  62. Epilogue
  63. About Campusland
  64. Acknowledgments
  65. About the Author
  66. Copyright