Have you ever found yourself in the midst of creating a “love letter, straight from your heart,” when you realized the recycling went out yesterday and the only newspaper lying about the house is a slightly incriminating back issue of Pravda? You’ve dug through the trash for twenty minutes and you just couldn’t find a letter J, as in “just bring unmarked twenties.”

The Ransom Note Kit features a decoy cigar box or heart-shaped candy box lined with small paper baking cups, one for each letter of the alphabet, with a larger compartment set aside for a glue stick, tweezers, and disposable gloves to conceal your ever-so-personal fingerprints. With this efficient system, magazines can swiftly be deconstructed and letters categorized, freeing up your valuable time for executing bigger things.

SUPPLIES

26 extra-small baking cup liners (see Note)

Cigar box or other gift box big enough to fit the liners and your tools

Craft glue or hot glue gun

Letters cut from magazines

Glue stick

Tweezers

Disposable gloves (optional)

HOW TO

1. Lay out the liners in the base of the box and decide your preferred arrangement. Make sure to leave room for your glue stick and tweezers. If your box is extra big you could also make a space for disposable gloves.

2. Glue the bottom of the cups to the inside bottom of the box.

3. Separate the cut letters alphabetically into the cups.

Note:

Paper candy cups are the perfect sized liner, leaving room inside your box for tools and gloves.

Some Tips for Manifestos and Other Rants

—— Cut larger letters from magazines——½- to 1-inch letters make a stunning visual impression.

—— Vary the look of your letters by mixing up fonts and colors. You’ll probably need to skim through a variety of magazines to stock your supply.

—— Kids’ and design magazines tend to have lots of interesting letters to choose from.

—— Steer clear of exotic and foreign periodicals if you are hoping to keep your identity secret; paperboys and mailmen tend to remember suspects with obscure interests.

—— Keep your message short and to the point.

—— Make sure to misspell at least one word. This gives the false impression of a lack of professionalism and thuggishness, plus it makes you sound scary.