Chapter 8
After you’ve completed the first draft of your ten-minute play, check the following list and see if it helps you in tightening your script. You should refer to this guideline periodically, using it for subsequent revisions.
Sometimes it helps to try to read the script anew, as if you hadn’t written it. I know that seems a bit odd, but you can pretend you haven’t read it before.
1. From the very first line, does the script engage you? The moment you feel disengaged, just mark the passage(s), then continue reading. Don’t analyze or try to fix anything at this point.
2. Wherever you feel the play loses you (becomes too convoluted, confusing), mark the section.
3. Do you believe the characters? Do they seem fully realized? If not, at which point do you feel they lose you? Be as specific as you can; underline the line or moment.
4. Does the way each character speaks sound authentic? Mark the words or passages that sound false.
5. Are there any characters that seem too similar to other characters?
6. Do you care about these characters? Do they offend you, annoy you, seem too abrasive?
7. Are all of your characters in this draft necessary? Can any of them be combined, eliminated?
8. Do you feel at any point that there’s too much narrative or exposition? Remember, with a ten-minute play too much exposition is a waste of space.
9. Do you notice any repetition in the dialogue, the same words or phrases being overused?
10. Do you feel that there is a repetition in the ideas being expressed? Are some characters expressing the same ideas repeatedly?
11. Is it clear what you’re trying to say in this play?
12. Is the theme of the play clear?
13. Does the ending make sense? Is it logical; was it earned?
14. How do you feel after finishing the piece? Do you feel satisfied that you accomplished what you set out to do?
15. Do you wish there was more? Do you feel that there was too much of any one element, character, scene, etc?
16. Are you happy with the title of your play? Does it work for the play that you’ve written?
At What Point Should You Have Someone Else Read What You’ve Written?
Some playwrights skip this step and go right to having readings of their play. It’s up to you. Having someone read your play and give you feedback can be helpful—or not. It depends on you and the person you’ve given the script to.
Some writers want to get feedback on their first draft as soon as they’ve finished working on it. Getting it to someone you trust for a response at the right time can be very helpful. But getting it to a reader prematurely is not a good idea. Before you give your play to someone, make sure that you genuinely feel that there is nothing at this time that you can do to improve it.
Once you let others comment on your work, they become a part of your relationship with your material. Their input, comments, and suggestions may have an impact on your rewrites. You may even want to wait until the second draft before handing your work over to someone else. There is no rule on this; only you will know when the time is right.
Selecting the Right Person to Read Your First Draft
Whom you ask to read your manuscript is very important. You should trust and respect the opinion of the person that you’re asking to read your material. You should feel that your reader can comment intelligently and supportively, and help with any problems they see in your text. Remember, no matter whom you choose, he or she is just one person, with an individual and subjective point of view. At the end of the day, it’s always your opinion that carries the most weight; it’s your baby.
Do not expect or allow the reader that you’ve selected to give you solutions to problems or suggestions as to how you should rewrite your play. You are not collaborating. The best readers are the ones that can pose the right questions to you, not give you answers.
The First Reading of Your Play
At some point after you’ve completed the first draft of your play, you should have a reading to hear what you have. You can have a private reading of your play at your home or a public one in a writers’ or actors’ group. Readings of first drafts of a play can be tricky in several ways. I’ve learned that sometimes very talented actors can make a play with problems seem like it doesn’t have them. These actors have the ability to “fill in” moments that really aren’t in the dialogue. On the other side of the coin, less experienced or talented actors can sometimes make a good script sound like it’s not quite there yet. It’s for that reason that I generally have at least two or even three readings of my new plays with different groups, and with different actors. If I’m seeing the same problems occurring in the script at each reading, then I know it’s something that needs to be addressed.
Cold Readings of Your Ten-Minute Play
I personally don’t like to have cold readings of my plays. I know that many actor-playwright groups meet and hand out scripts to actors to read, absolutely cold. The problem I have with this is that, since the actors haven’t actually read the script previously, they may go off in a wrong direction. Many good actors are simply not the best cold readers. And with experimental, absurd, poetic, or nontraditional plays, actors and audiences can easily become confused during a first reading and go off course.
I try to get actors my scripts a day or so in advance so that they can prepare. This doesn’t always work out, but for me it’s the best scenario. If I have a chance to discuss the piece with them in advance, that’s even better. That way we all know we’re on the same page. With a ten-minute play, actors don’t need too much time to absorb the material, but I like them to be familiar with the material before the reading.
Should You Be an Actor in the First Readings of Your Ten-Minute Play?
No. For you to be able to really hear the initial readings of your play and do any necessary rewrites, you must be able to stand back and hear your play objectively—along with any comments that the first listeners make. It’s best during these initial readings to sit in the rear of the group, where you can not only hear your play but also watch the audience. Notice any body language that may indicate that they’re not into it. Since it is only a ten-minute play, most people shouldn’t get restless or move around too much unless there is something wrong with the play and/or reading.
Listening to Feedback and Comments
Learning how to find value in comments can help you in your rewrites. So can knowing how to deal with negative or unhelpful comments. Opinions are like noses; everyone’s got one. Try to be as neutral as possible and take the comments about your play with some detachment. I know that this is difficult because this is your baby, and you may feel very vulnerable as others comment on it (sometimes harshly), but the more you can just hear their comments without feeling like your play or your talent is being attacked, the better the reading will serve you.
Do not dispute the comments that are made about your play; just take them in. Don’t justify anything that you feel was criticized. Praise should be accepted with appreciation but not given any more weight than the negative, harsher comments. It’s always nice to know someone “got” your play and what you were trying to do. But whether a comment is positive or negative, it’s likely to be subjective. We all have our own history, which can color our opinions. Try to ascertain where the commenter is coming from. This isn’t always easy when folks are tearing your play apart.
Not Allowing Others to Rewrite Your Play
I see this a lot at play readings. People, trying to help, will make suggestions about how to fix this or that moment, or how to end your play, or how to make a character more sympathetic, believable, etc. Hopefully, the narrator who is running the group will ask them to refrain from those sorts of suggestions.
If someone has a comment that totally baffles you, feel free to ask him or her to rephrase the question. If you still don’t understand, ask him or her to please be more specific and if possible to refer to the section of the play that inspired the comment. At what particular moment of your play did the person become lost during the reading? What things didn’t make sense or seemed illogical? The more specific the speaker can be, the more helpful their comments will be to you.
If everyone in the group makes the same comment about some aspect of your play, you may want to take a look at what they’re saying. If you still feel you don’t agree with them, don’t change it. Try having the play read in another group. See if that point comes up again. If it does, then take another look at the point both groups have made.
There are sometimes group politics involved when people comment on plays. For instance, comments may reflect the general esteem in which some playwrights are held rather than the merits or flaws of a particular piece.
Some people making comments just like to hear themselves talk and to show everyone how intelligent they are. Take that into consideration when listening.
Again, just listen and take everything in, good and bad. In the end only you will know what actually needs to be addressed.
Sometimes I take a break from working on the play and return to it at a later time. But if I received comments during the reading(s) that clicked for me, or I’m really hot on that particular play and genuinely feel I might be able to fix the problem, I continue on to the rewriting phase of the play, with these points in mind:
• Is this the story you wanted to tell?
• Is the conflict clearer?
• Are the characters better defined?
• Is there a clearer beginning, middle, and end?
• Does the play have a clear arc?
• Were you able to infuse any comments from the readings that you felt were appropriate into this draft?
• Are you satisfied with this new draft? Not just satisfied to the point that you feel “things can be worked out in production.” If it’s not on the page it’s not on the stage. You can’t expect directors and actors to make a play work that you honestly feel is not ready when you hand it out.
• Is this the play you meant to write?