Strategies for the Body
The body and mind are both part of the same person, as much as the fingers and lungs are part of the same person. Just as damaging one part of the body can impact another—an ankle injury leading to back pain, for example—harm to any part of the body or mind can spread out to other aspects of the self, including the spiritual parts. Since Kari Tauring has declared “I think, therefore I am” dangerous because it has torn body and mind apart, let us for the moment focus on them together, as part of one whole. While I see depression as a spiritual condition first, it is often identified first through the body, or especially the mind.
Moving and Eating
Depression has a stagnation to it; it encourages us to slow down physically and mentally. Observing this, Kirk White pointed out that movement—doing something—can get both body and mind unstuck. The doing of something is a shift in the relationship. Perhaps most important is to “put one foot in front of the other” and continue to make steps on the path of life, no matter how difficult. “Breathing is most important when you have asthma,” White said to illustrate the point, despite how hard it can be to do it. “The first full breath back is ecstatic.” Choosing not to breathe is choosing to die, and that’s not something most people will give in to without a fight. Giving in to the stagnation of depression—choosing to do nothing—is just as dangerous, although it can take months or years to succumb to death from depression alone.
During a period of depression, a counselor convinced White to sign a contract just to take a walk daily, invoking the power of one’s own word to make a change. Creating a contract like this is a way to hold oneself accountable, by making the commitment an external one. It uses the same motivational power we usually reserve for other living beings in our lives, such as pets. “People without kids and animals to care for have the luxury of being depressed,” White said. He and his wife reared one child to adulthood, and maintain a constant stream of animals at their Laurelin Retreat Center that have included dogs, cats, llamas, pygmy donkeys, and chickens. “You just have to get out of bed” when there are life-and-death issues to consider, because “somebody needs me.” I would have thought the opposite was true, but I had no external responsibilities during my worst period of depression: I’d dropped out of college, my pet was living with my parents, and my landlords were too kind to press me on the fact that I’d bartered work on the apartment for a place to live. Upon reflection, I see how having pets and a stepchild and a spouse and a mortgage have all helped me push through periods of depression that I’ve experienced since.
It’s important to celebrate any movement made, too, and I mean any movement, even if it’s something as simple as getting up and dressed in clean clothes. Inertia is a powerful force whether it’s reinforcing motion or stillness, and just because the first push against it doesn’t appear to yield much doesn’t mean it didn’t take a huge amount of effort. Just as Atlas would not have the strength to lift a pencil on top of bearing the weight of the heavens, someone with depression is expending most strength just on existing. Even minor accomplishments, therefore, are bigger than they seem. Acknowledge the effort and never, ever downplay it.
The value of this cannot be emphasized enough. Any action, no matter how small, is a victory—even if it feels woefully insignificant. Continents are not shifted across the face of the globe in one day; they are moved imperceptibly and it takes an incredible amount of force to make that happen. When you accomplish one small thing—taking a shower, opening the mail, walking around the block—you are channeling as much energy as some people would to run a marathon, and that should be acknowledged. As a priest of Poseidon, I have learned to invoke him as Ennosigaios—earth-shaker—to help make those small things happen when the inertia set against me feels vast.
There is some evidence that depression is linked to inflammation, and that like inflammation it has served an evolutionary purpose in healing and minimizing the spread of infection and disease. If that is the case, then taking steps to reduce inflammation might also reduce the effects of depression. These include:
- exercise,
- probiotics
- diet
This last one makes a big difference: high levels of sugar and refined carbohydrates (sorry, fellow bread-lovers) including sweet desserts, processed meats and junk foods, soybean and corn oils, trans-fats, and alcohol can all increase inflammation in the body. Instead, try to eat foods that come from a recognizable source like fruits, vegetables, and tree nuts; olive and coconut oil, fatty fish like salmon and sardines, dark chocolate, green tea, and even small amounts of red wine.30
EXERCISE 
What you’ll need:
- writing implement and writing surface.
What you’ll do:
Bad nutrition feeds depression, and poor planning can lead to bad nutrition. We eat what’s around when we are hungry, and we can take control of what’s around with a shopping list. Since even the simplest task can seem overwhelming during depression, it may help to begin by reciting this prayer to do one small thing:
Shining ones, if you will it,
may I see past the fog
to do this small thing.
Pick up the pen and write down whatever foods come to mind. Either jot down ingredients you’ve cooked with before, or meals that someone in your household might prepare if asked—including you. Visualize what you imagine eating at home, and go from there. Don’t be concerned about whether it’s good for you—frozen dinners are a step in the right direction if you get all your meals in a drive-through lane. Commit to preparing some of the food yourself, even if it’s only rarely. You can improve the quality and the quantity of the meals made at home as you do this exercise again.
If you’re stuck on coming up with even one recipe, think about the meals you’ve enjoyed with other people. What did you eat? Who prepared it? Ask that person for the recipe and try it out. If it doesn’t taste like you remembered it, you can go back to that person and ask for advice. Everyone wants to feel needed, and it’s easier to talk about cooking than it is depression.
Depression is a condition that impacts body, mind, and spirit, and addressing it through the needs of the body should not be ignored. “Encourage your depressed clients to eat a healthy low-chemical diet, to get enough sleep (but to make themselves get up if they are sleeping too much), to exercise even if only gently, to get out in the sun, to get out in nature, to sing if they have that interest, to get massage or other nice physical sensations, and to garden if they’re into it—getting one’s hands in the dirt has an antidepressant effect,” explained Raven Kaldera. “Emphasize that these activities are not curative, but can help one survive the storm. However, nothing helps if you don’t do it. Encourage them to take a buddy if necessary.”
Movement and exercise, even in small amounts, can begin to break down the pattern of behavior that reinforces depression. At its most extreme, depression can leave a body sitting on the couch or lying in a bed for most or all of the day, and even getting up and staying up and walking around the room is an improvement. Exercise for its own sake is not an easy habit to form, and it requires discipline that may be absent during a period of depression. Any action can be beneficial for breaking up the inertia of depression, but it might be easier to start with something physical. Small steps are fine, because they are motion; what you’re trying to avoid is stagnation, falling into a pattern that does not lead to any change in your circumstances, your behavior, or how you feel. Exactly what physical action to add depends on the present situation.
Are you spending a lot of waking hours in bed? Next time you get up for any reason, delay returning. Add a trip to the kitchen or bathroom, or empty the trash. You might even swing past a household altar, taking some time to straighten or dust some of the icons.
Has the couch become a sinkhole? If that’s the case, the remote control is not your friend. It’s just too easy to watch hour after hour of programming or videos on one screen or another. When the next bit of content is about to start, hit “pause” and take a stretch break. If you planned on setting up a snack, why not pop your head outside for a few minutes first? Just a simple amble around the perimeter of the building or yard can be enough to start. When you get back, take a moment to turn off the auto-play feature on the television, and then find a new place to keep that remote control: it should be within sight, but out of reach, so you have to get up to use it.
Taking on a hobby might bring with it a certain amount of joy or fascination that allows for concentration to be held. Hobbies tend to engage both body and mind, with the amount of movement and concentration varying depending on the one selected. They can also encourage the social interaction that is quite beneficial for mitigating symptoms of depression.31
Tenpenny understands that some people do physical ordeals as part of this work, but “it’s not my thing at all. It’s unpleasant and doesn’t do it for me. I got the endorphins, but it didn’t go anywhere, like [cocaine]. Ultra-marathons as a spiritual experience, in the mountains for days with no food? Nope, not me.” However, these things do work for other people, and he believes in trying new tools and techniques. “I’ve tried a lot of stuff,” he said.
Using the massive endorphin surge that comes from intense exercise is an effective way to manage depression, and I salute anyone who does become a triathlete, or builds log cabins by hand, or embraces other intense physical experience on a regular basis. Not everyone is going to dive into that, in part because getting motivated to make big changes is not easy during depression, but also because—as Tenpenny notes—for many people, it feels like trading one unpleasant experience for different one. It reminds me how housekeeping is a form of devotion to Hestia, but visitors to my home would never guess by tidiness alone that I have a relationship with that god. If you have the passion and capacity to jump into physical activity this completely, feel free! I cannot offer you advice on doing it safely and successfully, but rest assured your interest shows that you’re already well on your way to breaking depression’s hold.
The importance of healthy sleep should not be overlooked. “For some people who have chronic suicidal ideation, it may be a sign that they need some simple self-care, like a nap,” Rella told me. If a nap can save a life, that’s good to remember. Sleep patterns can become disrupted during depression, and then we further blur the lines if we choose to remain in bed, or in our sleep clothes, for much of the day. The first step toward a regular sleep routine is to set a bedtime and stick with it. Half an hour before bedtime, disconnect from screens. The light from many of them can disrupt falling asleep, as can the way the mind races from news story to cat video and back. Take that thirty minutes to allow the mind to slow down. Drink a cup of herbal tea, leaf through a magazine or a favorite book, talk to a family member, but don’t use technology. The world can wait. The next step to regularize sleep is to get out of bed, get washed up, and get dressed once you’re awake. Master that, and it will become a bit easier to stick to that regular bedtime.
Thinking and Feeling
Having separate words for body and mind reinforces what Kari Tauring says is the most dangerous idea in the western world, that our bodies and minds are separate, not part of the same person. That this is false can be seen in the impact of bodily actions on emotions. Gritting teeth and clenching fists until one is trembling feels very much like trembling with rage, and breathing quickly and shallowly can generate anxiety or fear. This is because while thoughts come from the mind, the emotions that color them stem from the body. Something of a feedback loop can be created, for example, with anger coloring thoughts that return to the mind thus angered, begetting more angry actions that put the body in a state to generate more anger. The same can happen with self-deprecating thoughts, creating that internal voice that consistently cuts oneself down. Tending to the needs of both body and mind are essential for managing a period of depression because the vulnerability that allows it entry could be in either.
Siobhan Johnson has found success in discarding the arbitrary distinction between “health” and “mental health,” and instead assuming that basic care for illness remains the same. “I find it helps to treat this like I would a physical ailment and to ask the people around me to do the same. There’s a lot of mileage in rest, good food, and the other things you’d do if it was a cold, or the flu, or something like that. Stay hydrated.”
Since emotions are housed in the body—something that is clear to anyone who has become grumpy on an empty belly—they can sometimes be released directly through the body. “Muscle massage, even without deliberate acupressure, can produce surprising results for relief of anxiety and depression. Some massage therapists have witnessed the sudden release of emotion that comes with activation of a trauma memory. Muscle memory trauma release can happen unexpectedly in the course of massage therapy for depression, pain, or injury … it is an unexpected bonus for healing the mind.” 32 In one study of massage, 75 percent of participants had a reduction in depression, a result comparable to what is found for therapy.33 Another healing modality that begins with the body is acupuncture. With those hair-thin needles placed at the correct points, acupuncture can promote healing of the mind by affecting the limbic system.34
Putting the body in motion can also put the emotions in motion. The body is where they live, and moving our limbs is one of the ways we can process them. This doesn’t have to mean long hours of training to compete in a triathlon, but it should involve moving more today than you did yesterday. If it helps, set reminders that it’s time to move and use a timer. Even if you’re only moving for thirty seconds, if it’s more than you were moving then it’s a positive change. Make a commitment to extend the amount of time at least once a week to make sure that you continue to move more and more.
Depression is characterized by slowing down and stagnation, even though the thoughts we experience can feel like they are coming very fast. In my experience, it’s not that there are too many thoughts to process so much as there are a few thoughts that are being repeated endlessly. Another way to look at it is as if your mind is generating thoughts at normal speed, but your ability to process those thoughts and all the emotions associated with them is slowed down—depressed. This slowing down is not entirely on the inside, either; other people sometimes will notice that someone experiencing depression is slower to act or react. It feels exhausting, and is expressed as brain fog and mental paralysis.
You have the power to contribute to your own healing. This is not an accusation, it is an affirmation. Yes, it is true that there are times when someone is in such a deep crisis that this idea is beyond them, and those people especially might benefit from professional help that could include prescription medication. The spark of healing can be weakened or extinguished if it is not tended, and medication is one way to rekindle it. For most of us, at most times during our lives, that spark still burns brightly in the darkness. The terrible, paradoxical truth is that we can become convinced of our own helplessness far more often than we can actually be rendered helpless. It does not serve depression for its companion human to pray, or seek out positive people, or exercise, or care for a pet, or to work magic, or to accept help from a mental health professional. We do not need studies to identify what thoughts and activities weaken the hold depression has on a person; all we need do is see what someone experiencing depression avoids! Invariably, we avoid the behaviors that weaken the grip, such as eating wholesome food, or meditating, or accepting invitations to spend time with other people.
“When you’ve exceeded your stress threshold and you feel anxious or depressed, you’ll need to reduce your stress,” writes psychiatrist Bick Wanck. “Ways to reduce stress include saying no to unnecessary activities [and] remembering to breathe.” 35 What Wanck doesn’t discuss is how one ends up near that stress threshold in the first place. Here’s one possibility: “If I say no to this request, this person may never speak to me again.” That fear leads us to bite off more than we can chew. We surpass that personal stress threshold, and
suddenly we can’t handle any of these obligations. We feel like a failure and withdraw from anyone who reminds us of that emotion. It’s a negative feedback loop of emotion, what I think of as depression’s dark cone of power, and once someone is caught in it they might find themselves exceeding that stress threshold again and again, getting buffeted each and every time.
Aging
My own experience affirms the anecdotes that I have collected: it gets easier to manage depression as one gets older, if only because it becomes easier to recognize it more quickly and start addressing it before it becomes overwhelming. I cannot promise it will ever be a walk in the park, though. Even as I was writing this book I had a wave of depression so strong come over me that I had to cut off several ongoing obligations just to get this project done, including my only paying job. I knew my spoons were dropping fast and that I would do more damage to myself and others if I didn’t act quickly, because even with some experience it still seemed to catch me unawares. Cutting down on my obligations was the best way to preserve my community ties in the long run, but I did beat myself up a bit for putting myself in a position where it was necessary. There are just times when I require a simplification of my life to avoid, or manage, a period of depression. Since these cycles happen over years, it is not a quick process to learn the patterns and the signs.
Emerging from a period of depression means being willing and able to engage fully with the world again. It’s living in sunlight; but just as darkness is not eternal, sunlight does not last forever. In times of darkness, we naturally seek to rest and withdraw, lay in firewood, and stock the shelves with canned goods. Emotionally it is the same, and what sometimes happens for me is that I commit myself to a reasonable amount of work, recreation, and service without considering whether I can maintain the same energy during a period of depression, should one arise. As with anything worth mastering, it takes patience and mindfulness to recognize those little triggers that jingle softly and bring depression around for a visit. Becoming an expert on one’s depression journey is something that comes from necessity, not curiosity. My patience and self-awareness come entirely from this need. Depression is a difficult teacher, but I have grown much from the lessons.
30. “Anti-Inflammatory Diet 101,” Healthline, accessed April 18, 2021, https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/6-foods-that-cause-inflammation.
31. Daisy Fancourt, et al., “Fixed-Effects Analyses of Time-Varying Associations between Hobbies and Depression in a Longitudinal Cohort Study: Support for Social Prescribing?” Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics (2019). DOI: 10.1159/000503571
32. Wanck, Mind Easing, 162.
33. Wanck, Mind Easing, 165.
34. Wanck, Mind Easing, 166–7.
35. Wanck, Mind Easing, 38.