Now it is not good for the Christian’s health,
to hustle the Aryan brown.
For the Christian riles and the Aryan smiles,
and it weareth the Christian down.
And the end of the fight is a tombstone white,
with the name of the late deceased.
And the epitaph drear:
“A fool lies here who tried to hustle the East.”1
— Rudyard Kipling and Walcott Balestier,
The Naulahka: a Story of East and West
It is said that in every human being there is at least one story. This may be true, but getting that story out and molding it into something readable is another matter entirely.
First, I would like to thank Wally and Betty Turnbull at Torchflame Books in Durham, NC. My words would have never been printed if these wonderful people had not listened to my passion and read my stories and supported me.
Second there is my editor, Darrell Laurant, who over two years of patience, grammar, spelling correction and my internal frustration has managed to patiently fine-tune A Life in Dark Places so it is readable. And through all this we remained friends.
And a cordial nod to Susan Amato who volunteered to be a second set of eyes in the editing process.
Sometimes a mention in the dedication of a book is simply not enough, and this is true for my wife, Kate Huntley, and my daughter, Kara Giannone. They stuck with husband and dad through periods of depression, writers block and mood swings. They too were my editors and confidantes as my ghosts arose again when revisiting the “Dark Places” in my life.
And a “Semper Fi” to my friend and counsel Robert “Bob” MacPherson for writing the Introduction to this book. Whenever a former army sergeant can get a decorated retired Marine Colonel to be his friend, you know he must be doing something right in this world.
I would like to recognize Marjorie Rosen, who told my story in Biography Magazine2 and got the ball rolling in the initial phase of this book. Thanks also to Francis X. McCarthy, my friend since my University of Michigan college days, and Bernie Edelman, a friend in Vietnam and forever after for spending time on the book and encouraging my work. And there is the support group of friends from Rochester and Auburn, New York: Carol and David Hampson, Dianne Defurio, Ted and Paige Herrling, Gary and Peg Salvage, Jim and Helen Burns, John and Mary Marcon, Marge and Bill Tracey, John and Bonnie Gleason, and John and Marcia Spoto.
I have received encouragement and support from my friends in Atlanta, Vince and Mabel Jeffs and Paul and Lynn Harren. In North Carolina, I received support from George and Leslie Small, Chuck and Diane Catotti, Barbara Kennedy and Diego Caballero and my numerous friends from my days at Family Health International. Marketing support from Hillsborough friend Sherry Kinlaw and web support from Jim Musson of Digital Computer Services. And then there are the artists, writer, professors; Allan Harmon, Brian Delate, Marge Harmon-Hemans, and George Haddow.
I have to acknowledge that my inspiration and my base comes from a variety of delightful people from all walks of life, cultures, religions and political beliefs with whom I’ve had the privilege of walking this planet. The officers and enlisted men of the 2nd and 5th platoons of the 29th Civil Affairs Company, especially Hal Smith, Pat Cariseo, Steve Cunnion, Jim Cormier, Neil O’Leary, Richard Galli and Terry Rumph, provided support and counsel as only brothers-in-arms can. A warm remembrance to Dennis Barker, my civilian supervisor in Vietnam; the people of Vietnam and the countless other countries I have worked in during this haj. I thank you for your friendship, counsel and compassion. You have all taught me how to see through the fog of war and peace and seek the truth no matter where it brings you. I am a better human being because of you all.
My thanks for the U.S. Army, the Near East Foundation, U.S. Catholic Conference, Family Health International, the American Red Cross, CARE and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention for believing in me as a professional and allowing me the privilege of learning, experiencing and working through these great organizations.
I would also like to acknowledge, thank and commend the field work of the UN agencies, including World Health Organization (WHO), United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees (UNHCR), U.N. Office for the Coordination of Humanitarian Affairs (OCHA) and of U.S. Government agencies such as United States Agency for International Development (USAID). I want to make it perfectly clear that these agencies play a vital role in international humanitarian and development assistance and deserve our individual and our governments backing and support. Some of my stories might be perceived by the reader as anti-UN or anti-USAID, but stories such as the “Gypsy Boy” are a reflection of the failings of individuals, not an organization. In my stories about USAID or CORDS, these organizations are implicated but they are the by-product of a broader systemic problem, a 40-year pattern of American international policy failures that I have repeatedly identified in my work and I optimistically hope someday will be corrected.
I had to take certain writer’s liberties with this book. I acknowledge that these are my words and mine only. My writings do not represent the views of the agencies I have worked for. My stories date back more than 40 years and my memory may be flawed, but I have well researched all the hard facts and they will stand the test of time. In some cases I had to compress my stories or time sequences in order to make my words readable.
In Chapter 5, “Don’t Mean Nothing,” I created the three soldiers targeted by the planted explosive charge. I did this because I wanted the reader to understand that those of us who wear the uniform and take the risks are real people. The men in the chapter are symbolic of many of our fallen who had their lives ahead of them when it was so uselessly taken from them. Too often, then and now, we see the names of our fallen heroes as only statistics in a paper or TV news program. Veterans do not feel this way. When one of us is killed or injured we feel the bite and the pain.
Kara’s birth in 1993 gave me the impetus to continue with a book I started in 1982. I wanted my daughter to know about me in case the worst happened, but I also wanted her to know and understand that the world is a beautiful place filled with many wonderful people. But it would be remiss of me not to acknowledge another great motivating force. I believe in the yin and the yang of this world. There is a dark side and it surrounds us all. I wanted Kara to understand the dark side of life, be able to recognize it and to fight against it. In many respects, what drove me to complete these chapters was the fact that I have seen the dark side too many times in this world and fought against it when I could. I have personally witnessed and been targeted by the hate, the prejudice and the threats. The most painful were those I called friends, and helped them in their careers, only to have them turn on me for ego, promotion and power.
My book acknowledges the extremes in this country and our world that are destroying democracy and humanity. It is both the ultra-conservative and ultra-liberal who are leading us down an evil path. They use names such as God, Buddha, Vishnu, or Allah to hurt others. Some distort our US Constitution and Bill of Rights to support their own agenda and greed for power. These individuals have caused me a great deal of anxiety, a feeling of betrayal and too many sleepless nights, but they will never imprison my humanity, soul or sense of humor.
These people are few in number but have caused a disproportionate amount of suffering in relation to their numbers. I acknowledge them for what they are. They have been my great motivators when I was tired and worn out from my work, for I knew if I said nothing I could not look my family or my fellow human beings in the face again.
To Kara and other readers, I will admit that I am not a writer but a witness. My words are the truth as I know it and my opinion and advice is what it is but it is born out of observation, service and hard work and backed up by my own research. My roots are both blue and green collar. I have put into words for the reader a slice of our history that the government cares not to talk about and the media does not fully report. For those who might care to read my words these are solely my opinion and guidance.
1 This poem was copied from the Stars and Stripes Pacific and written and carried in Paul Giannone’s notebooks while serving as an advisor in South Vietnam 1969-71. The words symbolized to Paul the ineptness of American policy and rather than “Aryan lies” shows what those in the Third World need to do to survive in this face of inadequate American policies and programs
2 Rosen, Marjorie. “Paul Giannone, Life Line to the Desperate and War Ravaged.” Biography, April 2002.