The story of your life is made up of the experiences you've had and the people you've known up to this moment. At every moment you have the ability to either continue the story in the direction it has been or to steer it in an entirely new direction, including this moment right now.
It's important, as we begin this journey together, to know that every journey begins with a starting point. That is where you are right now. By “where” I mean, where in your life you are, in every area of your life. How happy are you? How happy are you with your finances? Your career? Your relationships? Your general well-being?
In order to go somewhere, first you must know where you're starting from. If you were to go on a journey using the GPS function on your smartphone, you would need both the starting point and the ending point to get the directions. It's the same with the story of your life. Let's begin by getting clear about where you are as you write this new chapter. It's the first step in creating your new prosperous story.
When you think about the story you tell about your life, how do you tell it? What people or experiences do you focus on? Do you characterize your life as a triumph? Or a tragedy? Or do you flippantly say, “The story of my life would make people go to sleep!” You might feel that you haven't accomplished what you wanted to, or that you're stuck, or that you have many hopes and dreams. How you tell your story—to yourself and to others—matters.
It's interesting to note that the same set of experiences can be described in different ways. If ten people go to the same movie, and you ask them all to describe what the movie was about, you would most likely get ten different versions. One movie, ten different ways of seeing it.
We have the same ability to tell and retell the story of our life in different ways.
This is important because I want you to begin a new chapter of your life story, and how you tell this new story is influenced by the story you have already been telling.
Have you ever met someone new and very quickly they begin to tell you all their troubles and problems? How does that feel when that happens? Do you feel a bit trapped by them? Or do you join in and start talking about all your troubles and problems? If you start out talking to someone this way, you frame life through the lens of your troubles and problems.
We can also frame our lives through our triumphs and successes. We don't have to be boastful or arrogant about it, but we can see our life as one of overcoming adversity rather than being overcome.
Whichever way you have framed your life up to now, take a moment to reflect on whether you are a person who concentrates more on the positive or on the negative. Are you someone who tells a story of your joys or of your trials?
Here's a powerful exercise that can help reveal many things about your life to you. It's something that had a profound impact on me and helped me to reframe not only my past, but how I view my future.
DO THIS:
Create Your Timeline
In your journal (or on a sheet of paper), draw a line down the center. At the bottom of the line, write the word “birth” and at the top of the line right “now.” Put ticks along the line to denote periods of time (age five, ten, fifteen, etc., or any other denotation). It looks something like the example on page 28.
Now, take a few moments and begin thinking about the important experiences that have shaped your life. These can include things like: graduating from grade/middle/high school or college, first job, getting married, etc. It can include significant health challenges you faced (surgeries or major illnesses), relationship points (met significant other, got married/divorced, broke up), changed jobs, bought a house, and more. You can make this as detailed (or not) as you want. Now add significant experiences you've had. Add anything else that seems important, such as traveled to someplace significant, when a loved one died, or you discovered a new hobby that became a lifelong passion.
But I want you to add those things on your timeline in a particular way. If the experience was negative, chart it on one side of the line (I used the left side for this), and if the experience was positive or neutral, chart it on the other side of the line (I used the right side for this). A very simplified version could look like the example on page 30.
NOTE – You can alter this exercise in any way that adds meaning to you. The point is to create a map that gives you a snapshot of some of the highs and lows.
When I did this exercise, it had a profound effect on me. First, I noticed how many positive experiences I filled in. So much of what I dwelled on were the negative experiences that I often forgot to remember that my life had many positive experiences as well.
Second, I noticed something unexpected, which is that many of the most significantly positive experiences that I had happened shortly after some of the most negatives ones. In some cases, the negative experiences seemed to usher in something positive. A negative would seemingly result in a positive later on. Consciously or subconsciously, I somehow turned my setbacks into positive experiences.
And third, this timeline game me a sense of how much life I had lived. It gave me appreciation for all I've come through and compassion for myself. Like many people, I was often so hard on myself in the privacy of my own mind, berating myself for not being enough, for being too different, for my lack of a good job or money in the bank, for being overweight, etc. But seeing how much I went through to get to that point, I was filled with a sense of gratitude for my younger self and how brave I had been to get to where I was, even if it wasn't yet where I wanted to be.
I've since done this exercise with many people in workshops and classes, and I've seen firsthand how this simple exercise can create some profound revelations.
This exercise helps to create the Millionaire Mind.
It isn't for navel-gazing. It gives you a sense of your origins and also your patterns, your strengths, and those areas where you might need some help. Self-knowledge helps to build prosperity.
This exercise also gives you a history you can draw from as you write this new chapter of your life. The best books I've read—whether they are memoirs or novels—always give the reader a sense of the history of each character. The more a reader knows the backstory of a character, the richer the reading experience and the greater the sense of how much the character had to overcome.
For my timeline, on the left side, I put “got into $60,000 in credit card debt,” but on the right side I put “became debt free.” That doesn't tell the whole story of course, but it frames an important part of it.
As you look at your timeline, do you see any patterns? That brings us to an important point to remember . . .
Many people keep creating the same experience over and over again. This can range from deep-seated patterns, learned in our childhoods, to habits that we've acquired over the years.
When I was a kid, my mother often said:
“If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.”
She would tell me this to try to get me to make better choices, usually around school or the house. But this simple little saying is actually an important lesson for all of us.
The level of your success at this point in your life is the sum of your thoughts, beliefs, and actions up to now. And if you keep living your life with the same thoughts, beliefs, and actions, then you'll continue to achieve roughly the same amount of success. You won't get something different until you do something different. And you won't do different things until you become different.
There is a business saying that is similar to what my mother used to say. It goes like this: what brought you here won't take you there. And the great New Thought teacher Wallace Wattles said that you can't have more until you first become more (that's my paraphrase, by the way). All of this is to say that once you truly know who you are—warts and all—then you can move forward.
So let this be the line in the sand, this moment, right now. I'm going to draw a line here for you:
A little further in the book I'm going to ask you to make your final decision to live your life your new way: to release limiting thoughts and actions and create new, empowering thoughts and habits that will bring you your goal. For now, I want you to look at the line and see if you are ready for the story of your life to take a new, prosperous turn. The following exercise will help you cross that line in the sand.
Are you ready for MORE?
DO THIS: Let Go of What You
Don't Want
For this exercise, you'll use the line above or draw one in your journal. On one side of the line I want you to write “who I was” and list all the things you don't want to bring with you in your new chapter of wealth. Some of the things you might write include: debt, negative people (by name), procrastination, clutter, a job I don't like, etc. These are not things you will necessarily shed immediately, but they are things you are willing to let go of once you cross the line. They belong in your old life, not where you are headed.
On the other side of the line, write “who I am” and list the opposite of each thing that you already wrote. If you wrote “credit card debt” on the side “who I was” then on the other side of the line write “debt free.” Do this with each thing you wrote. Through this action, you are creating a mental image of what you want, rather than focusing on what you don't. You are writing what you want to experience.
DO THIS: Create a Cast of Characters
In your journal, write a list of the people who are actively in your life. These are the people you live with, work with, hang around with. These might be friends, coworkers, family members, and anyone else who is a constant presence in your life.
This is your cast of characters. These are the people you are surrounded by. As in a novel, some of them may be heroes, some of them might be villains, many of them might be supporting players.
Look at the list and note which of the people on the list are positive influences, who fill you with energy when you are with them. Which of the people on the list are negative influences, who drain you of energy when you are with them (or even when you think about them)? Which ones are neutral? For now, just notice. Are the majority of the people in your life positive influences? Or are most of them negative? Or a mix of both?
DO THIS:
Release the Past
Before we begin creating the life you want, take a moment to release and let go of your past. Take a few minutes to look at both the timeline you created and the cast of characters. Some of what you wrote fills you with joy and empowerment, some of what you wrote might make you angry or sad, and some of it just is what it is. In any case, the total of all of what you wrote is what brought you to this moment.
Now, in your mind (or you can write this out in your journal), say “thank you” to everything that brought you here—the positive, the negative, everything. You aren't condoning negative things, and you aren't brushing over hardships. Instead, you are acknowledging that through it all, you are still here and you are now getting ready to let go and move on to greater experiences. Acknowledge all of your experiences, thank them, and then mentally release them. You can say to yourself (or write in your journal), “I now release the past and embrace the future.” Or anything else that will conclude this chapter of your life.
Now, take a breath and imagine yourself turning the page. A new, greater, more prosperous chapter is about to begin.
Use the following powerful reminders as you continue on your journey to prosperity. You can turn them into affirmations or post them where you'll see them often.
Stop:
Start:
