I live in the here and now
In this chapter, we will delve into what mindfulness is and the effect of stress on our mind and body. We will also explore the power of your breath and how you can make mindfulness a simple and accessible part of your daily life. It seems that no matter where you go these days, you can’t escape being confronted by the word “mindfulness.” It is the new buzzword and seems to be everywhere in books, on the front cover of magazines, and being talked about on TV and the radio. As you can’t seem to escape it, you may as well jump on the bandwagon and see what all the fuss is about!
So let me ask you, would it not be a wonderful thing to have a calm and serene mind through the ups and downs of our daily lives? Imagine having the ability to learn ways in which to stop the constant cascading thoughts, often negative ones, from arising. Do you sometimes feel that you will never be able to change your way of thinking no matter how hard you try? Well, you are not alone! I struggled for many years to slow my mind down and have more control over my thoughts and each day is still a journey toward mastering this.
Mindfulness and meditation practices have helped me so much in beginning the process of rewiring my brain to think in a different way; to truly opening my mind to the beauty in each present moment. It all sounds so cliché, I know, but now when I have a negative thought arise I literally cut it off midway in my mind and tell myself I really do not have the time for it. With a baby, a business, and a household to run, I really don’t have the time to waste on negative thinking.
The practices of meditation and mindfulness enable us all to befriend ourselves on our journey through life, embracing the ups and downs so we can actually begin to fully enjoy the ride. I know that in my own life the more I talk to myself as if I were talking to a good friend and practice more kindness, compassion, and less judgment toward myself, the more I am able to be this way authentically with others. I am still keeping it real and holding myself accountable, but I’m only doing that through the lens of self-love and self-compassion, which is far better than the lens of judgment, criticism, and self-loathing! Let’s be honest, it can often feel like we are living our lives with the judge on one shoulder, the critic on the other, and that constant state of worry in the middle. No wonder we feel like we are merely going through the motions of our day, barely being able to enjoy much of it as we are trying to keep those three negative chatterboxes at bay. Learning through mindfulness and meditation practices to let go of that inner judge, critic, and worrier has been a true game changer for me, beyond anything I could ever have imagined.
I notice how much easier it is when I am able to do this and actually enjoy wherever I am much more. This is also a vital aspect of the ability to welcome spending time alone and being in silence as opposed to running away from any chance to be alone with yourself and your thoughts. Many people find this very difficult to do, as they can’t dial the noise down in their own minds. You can raise your hand if you are one of these people and, if we are honest, it is most of us.
Silence Is Golden
Our fear of being in silence is one of the reasons why the television is always playing in the background, there is music on constantly, or we are always on the phone. Of course there is nothing wrong with any of those things; I love a bit of TV and music myself! I was never a huge TV person but I love music and it was always playing in the background when I was home or on the go. I realized that it was actually really nice to be in silence, and a part of my mindfulness practice now is having the windows open and listening to the sounds of the birds when at home or enjoying being present wherever I am when I am out.
Now I only play music when driving, which makes it much more enjoyable as it is not just background noise but more purposeful listening as I immerse myself in each song while of course not getting too carried away with the tunes and paying attention to the road! Our TV is barely watched which makes paying the cable subscription even more annoying; but when we do watch TV it tends to be a nice activity for my husband and I to do together. Rather than just mindlessly watching television, it becomes more of an intentional act and an activity that you can share with your loved one.
How Can I Practice Mindfulness?
Very simply, you can practice mindfulness by bringing your mind to the present moment, which is right now. Not living in the past, as we often tend to do, playing the same old tape over and over again in our minds. Nor is it projecting into the future and worrying about what is going to happen. Instead, the focus is on fully embracing the power of the present moment, which is all that we have. The ancient science of mindfulness and meditation practices has now been scientifically verified by modern scientists and been proven to work. Neuroscience in the past twenty years has proven the correlation between meditation and mindfulness practices as a way to regenerate our brains.
Bringing the power of yoga, meditation, and mindfulness practices to my patients and clients is something that gives me so much joy, and it is wonderful to see mainstream Western medicine embracing Eastern wisdom and ancient holistic practices. One of the most liberating things about adopting a daily mindfulness practice is that it allows you to stop living in the past. In addition, it teaches you to not worry incessantly about the future. We are all often guilty of doing both of these things, neither of which is any fun, I might add.
This does not mean that you do not learn from your mistakes made in the past, nor plan for the future. It simply means that you are not a prisoner of your mind, either living in the past or projecting, often negatively, into the future. If you can do this, you can start the process of freeing your mind to be in a place of nonjudgment, learning to absorb the beauty of each moment with love and compassion toward others and yourself. As I always like to say to my patients and clients, thank goodness what we worry about doesn’t actually happen. Most of the time we are playing out worst-case scenarios in our minds that are the making of complete nightmares.
Mindfulness is an ancient Hindu and Buddhist practice and can focus on bringing your mind and attention fully into the present moment by using your breath. Our breath, which is our life force or prana as we call it in Sanskrit, enables us to bring body and mind together. This allows us to live in the present and not be chained to our pasts or victims of our future. Often we live in the prison of our own minds, replaying the tape of the past over and over again and worrying incessantly about the future. Through mindfulness we are able to fully embrace the beauty of the present moment and live in the now.
It is liberating to learn to become unchained from your past, letting go of your own limiting thought patterns and beliefs that have been holding you back from actually being happy. The good news is that right in this very moment you can make the choice to become fully aware of the now and feel how deeply freeing this can be. This is when the beauty of the present moment can really begin to unfold and the magic can start to happen in your mind and life!
Become Aware of this Moment
The mind of the average person is restless, even when making a concerted effort to concentrate. When you try to focus or still the mind, you may often have little success as the mind continues to drift in various directions. I remember years ago when I first began a dedicated meditation practice how I would sit in silence and be able to do it easily. What I found far more difficult to control was my wandering mind as it played my to-do list back, things I was worried about, or I found myself drifting off in aimless daydreams. It made me realize how much our minds tend to wander and how unsuccessful we are at controlling our thoughts and our minds.
What I have found to be very helpful over the years is to focus the mind and attention on one task at a time. Giving one hundred percent of your attention to whatever you are doing in each moment is not easy but can become much easier with dedicated time and effort. My suggestion and what has worked in my own life is to devote your entire will power to accomplishing one thing at a time versus trying to do fifteen things without any real success as your attention and energy is so divided.
The Effect of Mindfulness on Stress
Modern science is now able to prove the benefits of these practices and the effect of the breath as a way of resetting our bodies and minds. When we take an inhalation and we force an exhalation we activate the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) response in the body. The PNS is the aspect of the central nervous system (CNS) that calms the body and interfaces with the vagus nerve, the longest nerve in the body and part of the autonomic nervous system (ANS). The vagus nerve controls our heart, lungs, and digestive tract and promotes relaxation in the body, basically our rest and digest response.
Through our breath and via slow diaphragmatic breathing, we activate the vagus nerve, which balances the stress response in the body. We are then able to regulate our heart rate and blood pressure, thus entering a state of mental and physical calm and relaxation. When you are feeling stressed or anxious, taking a deep inhale and a long exhale enables you to slow your heart rate and blood pressure down and bring your mind back to the present moment. Think of it in the sense that you have your body and you have your mind and it is your breath that interlinks the two together.
Yoga and physical exercise in general create so many feel-good chemicals and hormones in our brain that are then released by the endocrine system into our body. When we feel relaxed and content, the brain releases “happy” chemicals or neurotransmitters that affect us in different ways. Dopamine is our feel-good hormone and is associated with our motivation and ability to concentrate. Serotonins act as a mood stabilizer and prevent anxiety and depression. Endorphins can block pain and oxytocin provide feelings of love and trust.
All of these hormones can be produced in the brain via yoga and meditation practices which is why we see that yoga is everywhere these days, very simply because it works. Neurotransmitters are our chemical messengers that relay information from one part of the body to another. Mindfulness and meditation practices are the way for you to keep this internal process calm and in check.
What happens when we cannot slow the mind down or focus on the things that we need to in our day? Research has shown that we spend almost half of our waking time thinking about something other than what we are doing, referred to as the wandering mind. It would be great if the wandering mind caused us more happiness and peace in our lives, but in fact it is quite the opposite: it is causing us to be miserable, anxious, and ill at ease. We are unable to relax even when we want to and enjoy the things that bring us happiness.
Even when on vacation at the most idyllic location or having some weekend downtime, you can still find it almost impossible to turn off that constant mind chatter taking you away from the present moment and where you are physically at. No matter what we do, we just can’t seem to slow our minds down in the constant whirlwind of to-do lists and the pressures of daily life. If we can’t find happiness in our daily lives, we will never be able to find that peace within.
So how does this lack of being able to be present affect you? When something stressful occurs or we perceive something stressful to be happening such as when we are worrying or ruminating about a problem, the amygdala sets off the alarm system in the brain signaling the major organs in the body to get ready to fight or flee. The sympathetic nervous system (SNS) kicks into action, and the pituitary gland signals the adrenals to start secreting the stress hormones adrenaline, epinephrine, and cortisol. This is useful if something stressful is actually happening, for example, if you are about to give a big presentation or run a marathon. Normally though, this is not the case. Instead, we are constantly activating the SNS and living in that continuous state of fight-or-flight mode, waiting for the next crisis to occur. Over time, this causes a lot of damage to the body as unreleased cortisol from stress and anxiety builds up in the blood. The result can cause illnesses such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, heart attacks, stroke, weight gain, lower immune function, depression, anxiety, lower life expectancy, and the list goes on.
How can we combat this buildup of cortisol in the body and find an effective way to release it? The answer is through mindfulness and meditation practices! Mindfulness and meditation practices can shrink the amygdala, the brain’s reactionary fight or flight center. The good news is that you can practice mindfulness anywhere and anytime by simply bringing your awareness to your breath. Our breath, which is our life force, brings our body and mind together. This really enables you to live in the present and escape that constant interna negative narrative replaying the past or projecting negatively into the future.
Mindful Attention on Breath
In yoga philosophy, your breath is referred to as your prana. This is the Sanskrit term for life force or energy within. Our prana also represents the vibrational force of all of creation. Through your prana or breath, you are able to regulate the functioning of your body. For example, when somebody is having a panic or anxiety attack, what are they told to do? Breathe, because deep breathing regulates the stress response in the body and calms the central nervous system down. Everything in your body is held together through your breath. Controlling your breath through the inhalation and the exhalation is what a yoga, meditation, and mindfulness practice is all about and is the key to unlocking the wisdom and power of your soul within.
It is believed that wherever your mind goes, your breath follows. If you are able to bring your mind under control through meditation and mindfulness practices, you are able to bring your breath under your control also. This is what the true purpose of yoga and meditation is about as outlined in Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra. First you learn to control the physical body through asana or the yoga postures, which is the third limb on the eight-limb path of yoga. Then you learn to control the movement of the breath through pranayama, or breathing exercises, which is the fourth limb.
The next step is beginning the process of learning how to withdraw the senses through pratyahara, the fifth limb, followed by the mind through dharana, concentration, the sixth limb, and dhyana, meditation, the seventh limb. The final result is samadhi, or union with God or universal consciousness in the eighth limb. This is the reason we come to our yoga mats or meditation cushions and is what keeps people coming back day in and day out. When you catch a glimpse of what your body and breath are capable of, you want more and more of that feeling of deep inner peace and sanctity within.
Rewiring Your Brain
We can become so caught up in our constant negative internal narrative. We can’t even seem to fully embrace the good in our lives or when things go well as we are waiting for the other shoe to drop, living in constant anticipation of something bad to follow. This is no way to live and is the opposite of choosing to embrace living in the present mindfully and intentionally. So you might now be thinking, well, how can I be happy in the present moment? The good news is that it is actually possible to rewire your brain through mindfulness and meditation practices. So you can begin to feel in control of your thoughts and not just be living at the mercy of them.
How nice would it be to actually be in control of your thoughts and emotions for a change. What you have to remember is that the mind actually does what it thinks you want it to do. Its main goal is to save you from painful experiences and move you toward happier ones. Rather ironic, I know, that the mind ends up being our worst enemy most of the time versus our friend! The reason primarily is because we allow it to run wild with no restraint or restrictions in place whether you are consciously aware of it or not.
Science has confirmed that via the brain we are able to adjust the chemical balance in our bodies and minds to feel those positive vibes. The hippocampus is the part of the brain that is responsible for our happiness, emotions, and where our short- and long-term memories are stored. We are naturally wired through evolution to pay more attention to negative experiences versus positive ones, as a survival mechanism and we are all familiar with this no doubt! The amount of times we focus on that one person who says something negative to us versus the ten people who said something positive. Or we obsess about the few people in our life who are not supportive versus being truly grateful for the people who are consistently loving and encouraging.
One of the most liberating things about a mindfulness practice is that it enables you to free yourself from your constant over thinking. Please raise your hands, over-thinkers in the group. After years of being an over-thinker and over-analyzer, I can honestly say that this is truly the root of creating problems that don’t exist. Committing to a regular meditation practice also allows you to focus on your thoughts, emotions, and actions in a way that is productive—so self-study versus self-flagellation. Most of us who spend time over-thinking and over-analyzing have a tendency to be far more critical of ourselves, berating ourselves for mistakes made which is hardly the path to inner happiness.
Neuroplasticity
The good news is that mindfulness and meditation can help rewire your brain to transform your life. Research has shown that through these practices you are able to create new neural circuitry in your brain, altering your brain and mind in order to change your life. The more you are able to detach from the thoughts that are not serving your highest good, the more you become mindful of the internal wallpaper of your mind. Then you will be better equipped to start replacing those negative thoughts with more positive ones.
The ability of the brain to vary or change its patterns is called neuroplasticity. In the last twenty years, neuroscience has proven the correlation between meditation and mindfulness practices as a way to regenerate our brains and minds. The bombshell is that you are able to control the way your mind works if you can control your thoughts. This all comes back to how important it is to be mindfully present with your thoughts so you can keep your internal narrative under control.
Creating Your Own Superpower
Mindfulness doesn’t solve all of your problems and make them magically turn into puppies and rainbows. Nor is it an excuse to avoid exploring what is going on within such that you turn into an emotionless shell. Mindfulness is in fact the opposite of this and allows you to control your emotions more by having a heightened awareness when a negative emotion or thought arises and then be able to process it in a constructive manner. Think of mindfulness as your superpower and yourself as the new comic book heroine or hero with meditation and mindfulness as your armor. Can’t wait for that comic book to come out! In yoga philosophy, it is said that mindfulness is a wonderful way to create dynamic willpower to form good habits.
The Yoga Sutra talks about how restraining the mental modifications of the mind is actually the practice of yoga and the reason we do it. If you are able to do this, then you have achieved the goal of yoga. It sounds easy but in practice is obviously far more difficult. The Yoga Sutra says that the entire outside world is based on our own thoughts, as our thoughts then become our reality. This is why the practice of yoga and meditation is not concerned with changing the external world but focuses on changing your internal landscape. How you view the world through the lens of your mind and thoughts in turn affects your experience with the world around you.
Mindfulness works. Like anything, though, you have to do it. The more you practice, the easier it becomes, and this is how over time it becomes your superpower. Our exercise for this chapter will aid you in the process of making a daily mindfulness practice an accessible and easy part of your life. Learn to let go of the past and live fully in the here and now. The present moment is the only place that we can really embrace and experience joy and peace from within.
Exercise
Five-Minute Chakra-Balancing Practice
Set your alarm for five minutes. Come to a comfortable seated position in a chair or on the floor; you can also do this practice lying down. Wherever you are, ensure the spine is in a neutral position, so remove any cushions or pillows from underneath your head or neck so the cervical spine can remain long. Gently close the eyes if that feels comfortable to you or you can remain with the eyes open. Begin by taking three deep audible inhales and exhales in through the nose and out through the mouth. Once you have completed the three rounds of that breath work pattern, release, returning to your normal rhythm and pattern of breathing.
Gently feel that you are relaxing all of the muscles in the head, neck, and shoulders. Release the tongue from the roof of the mouth and relax the point between the eyebrows. Slowly and gently allow your mind to settle in that place of stillness and quiet within, letting go of all of your daily cares and concerns. You have none of those things in this moment. All that you have is your breath. Now take your attention to the chest and belly area and become aware of the movement there as you breath. Notice how the breath feels in this space.
Now do a complete scan of your body, noticing if there is any tension residing in any other parts of your body. Use your breath to move to those parts of the body that may be feeling tight or tense. Breathe space into these areas of tightness, allowing the oxygen and blood to flow more freely through these spaces. After your body scan is complete, sit with your breath focusing on each inhale and exhale, silently repeating the intention: “I live in the here and now” until your alarm rings signaling the end of your practice.