Contents

Foreword

The Case of the Missing Parisian Absinthe Kiosk

The Betjemanisation of South London

The Dreamed Vortex

Simpering Psychomuff

The Vegetable Liberation Front

The Shitley Experiment

The Slightly Underground Railway

An Abridged Larkin Poem

That Giraffe’s Head Was Always Coming Off

Twitterborough

The Age of Oxygen

A Multi-Dimensional World

There Is No Rationalism but Rationalism

How Kryptogel Will Change the World

Zeppelins Full of Shit

Velvet Smackpad

The Molecules of Swinging London

Hubmakers v Spacesmiths

Youthanasia

Slow Modernism

The Irony Bridge

Pathetic Fallacy 1, Emphatic Delusion 0

The Decadent Egg

Remagination

It’s the Sulk I’m Really After

One One

Pudding Gateshead

The Collide-O-Scope

A Strange Glint

The New Pop-Uption

19th-Century Brickdust

The Certification of Public Space

The Blard

A Cross-Vectored Media Partnership

The Airpunch

Goodbye Olympic Rebadging Task Force

Magnetic Values

The Chapel of Notre Dame du Marmalade

Latest Books About Icons

An Analogue Underground Cotswolds

Little Stripey Crestfallen Moons

The Jockular Campus

Metarchitectural Sausages

Looks Nice Theory

Battle of the Styles

The Hard-Working Class

Dysgustopia

Windhampton

I Am Grand Designsy

I Sense My Enemies Massing Like Simpering Starlings

Five Versions of Me

Kenny Axe-of-Wrath, Meet Julie Bloodbath

Diana Princess of Wales Laying a Wreath at an Accident Blackspot Wearing Sunglasses Plus She’s in a Wheelchair

The People’s Centre for Cultural Transmution

The K’buum el-K’buum Residuals Farm

If Only Time Will Tell, Should Architecture Really be a Narrative?

Back to the Futurniture

Right Enough to be True, True Enough to be Trite

Human Content Management

A Critical Stream of Piss

Obituary: T. Dan Hooker

Little Gatsby

Ha Ha Ha You Fucking Ants

This Sorry Cabal of Pretension

The Plagiarism Assizes

Cross-Glaminated Poverty Style-Out

Eurafrica: A New Bivalve of Hope

Masked Grans Dancing on a Bungalow Roof

From Fenestrated Parabola to Melty Fucklump

The Strategic Mentalising Unit

Supra-Heezy Ionised Piff

Insulational Rescue

An Inspector Calls

Owning the Vagination

A Bubble of Absence Enclosed by Sentient Retardant Foam

Get a Grip, Munchniks

Laughable Bear in a Frock

Extended Prison Break

Yesterday’s News Is Tomorrow’s Emergency Clothing

The Emptiness Between All Particles

Fuck Shitter

The Epic Space Foundation

Oligarchitectural Capitalism Versus Patriarchitectural Sexism

The Right to Let Die

Evil in a Pork Pie Hat

Rough Concrete and Mulleted Genitals

The Henge

Curse You, Buildings That Resemble Breasts Quarterly

Yipster Gentrification

The Dalek Clusterfuck

Honeycombed Privatised Air

Twirly Atlantis

Austerity Christmas Human Turducken

The Worm Is Cast

This Feudopolitan Life

Hello Kinky Pinky

Post-Ecological Re-Regeneration

If It Ain’t Broke, Amend It

History Eats Itself

The Twelve Step Plan

Not Being Funny but Black People Don’t Do Gardening, Do They?

The Bees Have It

A Sense of Placenta

Acknowledgements

Supporters

Copyright