Chapter 9
Be Focused
Many people think that the ability to focus or concentrate should come naturally and that when we don't focus it's because we're not trying hard enough–if only we would try harder, it would happen. This is an erroneous view and an incorrect conclusion. The untrained mind has huge difficulty in concentrating on anything for more than a few seconds, let alone a couple of minutes at a time. In Chapter 2 I shared with you the most recent research on this topic.
I also talked about multitasking in Chapter 2, which is one of the greatest impediments to the ability to focus. It is a malaise of our time and a hindrance to optimal effectiveness, sustained performance, and creativity or inspiration. If we can't concentrate on one thing, what makes us think that we will be able to concentrate on five things at a time? It defies logic. In fact, as noted in research coming out of Stanford University, multitaskers don't focus as well as non-multitaskers, are more distractible, and are weaker at shifting from one task to another and at organizing information.1
However, when you train your mind, you are able to concentrate on whatever you wish, for as long as you wish. This makes you highly effective and efficient. And with training and practice you can stay focused, whether under stress or in the presence of multiple opportunities or distractions. The ability to keep your eye on the ball makes all the difference between winning and losing, between utilizing and wasting resources, which can be key to successful leadership.
The ability to focus means you can be in a meeting from beginning to end without losing concentration. It means you are able to stay present when you are having a conversation or negotiating a deal. It means you can drive without your mind wandering. And it means that you can play a round of golf without thinking about the miserable shot on the last hole or the hole in one you made yesterday. It means that you can focus on what matters most to you in any given moment.
Mindful Makeover
The Scenario
It is one of your busiest times of year. You have your annual meeting, you are finalizing your five-year strategic plan, and you are meeting with the equity analysts, all in a span of three days. You know that it will be a challenge to stay on message because of the diverse interests of various stakeholders.
Before
You know the importance of this time for you, your team, and your business. You want to be able to satisfy all stakeholders, and in so doing, you go off message. As a result, you are not consistent in your communication; you water down an important part of the message because you have lost focus by trying to appeal to all of the various interests. This is picked up by the equity analysts, and your plans are perceived to lack focus.
After
As a mindful leader, you are keenly aware of how important this time is in your business cycle and how critical it is for you to stay on message. As you meet with various stakeholders, you adjust the nuances of your message to suit the various parties, but you are consistent in everything you say and maintain a clear message, at all times staying focused and keeping your eye on the ball.
As you know by now, you can train your mind. In fact, every technique I mention in this book trains you to focus. Every time your mind wanders and you bring it back to your object of concentration, you are developing and deepening your ability to focus. At first it seems pretty modest. Every time you start working with a technique, you wonder how long you've been doing it and how much time is left to go, you begin to think about breakfast or dinner, you are distracted by your to-do list, and so on. I always tell my clients that it doesn't matter how many times you have wandered; what matters is that you have come back. This is not intended as childish encouragement. It is absolutely true. Anyone who has trained a puppy knows that repetition matters. It doesn't matter how many times the puppy falters; you use the same positive tone and you keep at it until the puppy gets it. And in order for the puppy to get it, you really need to be patient–if you are not patient, the puppy will become agitated.
That is exactly what people need: patient, deliberate training. Getting annoyed at yourself when your mind wanders during a formal meditation is not helpful. In fact, it makes you agitated and your mind more entrenched in those thoughts to which the mind wandered. As overachievers we often will our way through things, whether it be a long work day or a marathon. But willing yourself to stay focused doesn't work one bit. In fact, if you think that you are able to will yourself to have “no thoughts,” chances are you are just suppressing those thoughts, rather than not having them, and are thereby deluding yourself.
What we are after in meditation is effortless effort. Now, I know that sounds like a contradiction, but it's not. The effort you make–and here's where will is very effective–is in committing yourself to a regular meditation practice, to actually doing it. What you do when you sit for meditation is completely different. It should be effortless. Once you are sitting, you need to be as gentle as you can possibly be, noticing when you have wandered and being vigilant about gently coming back. You can be sure that this way of sitting will bring you the greatest and speediest progress.
Strategies for Mindfulness in Action
In addition to using formal meditation to increase your concentration, you can train yourself to focus during daily life, whether at the office, at home, or on the treadmill. If you intend to concentrate on anything at all and you notice that your mind has wandered, gently bring it back.
You may find yourself in a meeting that you are not leading and that, in your view, is not very useful or well run. This can cause your mind to wander as you feel aggravated or even resentful that you are wasting your time. In turn, this can cause negative reactions, such as increased blood pressure or an irresistible urge to say something inappropriate. It's also possible that you'll get lost in your own thoughts and not notice that something you disagree with has been approved. Now imagine that you have several such meetings a week, all of which trigger the same reaction. Pretty soon they'll start to take a toll on your health and well-being.
If you are being mindful, you will likely choose a different response. If you are able to get out of the meeting and spend your time in a more useful way, by all means do it. But very often it is not possible to leave such meetings. If that is the case, then see it as presenting a wonderful opportunity to practice a mindfulness-in-action strategy and to develop your ability to focus more deeply. Decide on a technique you will work with, and then stick with it. You may choose something as simple as your breath. Maintain focus on a part of your breath. If you wish to relax, choose the out breath and notice how your body relaxes every time you breathe out. When you notice that your mind has wandered, come right back to your breath.
Because you are still in the meeting, you will be dividing your attention–paying attention to what is being said in case you need to respond, and then going right back to your breath. Because you breathe all the time, this is not multitasking. You already know how to breathe and do something else. You are merely choosing an aspect of breath to work with.
You could also choose to work with sight and sound, as discussed in Chapter 6. Give what is being said and what you see your undivided attention. When you notice your mind has wandered off, very gently bring it back. Every time you come back to sight and sound you are developing your focus muscle. Think of it like reps when lifting weights.
The same strategies apply if you are at what you consider a boring function or cocktail party, say. Again, if you can choose to not participate, by all means use your time in ways you prefer. But if it's a command performance and you need to be there for your sake or someone else's, then rather than compromising your well-being or becoming exhausted from being where you don't want to be, alter your mind-set so that the situation benefits you.
This can turn a truly boring experience into a highly productive one in terms of training your mind. And, of course, anytime you increase your ability to focus or concentrate in one context, it's transferable to every other situation in your life.