PROLOGUE
CLAUDIA
This is the official history of the First Annual Culvert Prep Middle School Scavenger Hunt For Charity.
I am writing it because there is a WHOLE lot of bad information out there about what happened. Mostly because of that stupid article in the New York Star.
Which was almost completely not true. At NO point did ANYBODY involved in the hunt “run riot.”
Except possibly for a couple of minutes at the end. But I can explain that.
And I’ll admit that what happened was technically a “fracas.” But since almost nobody has any idea what that word means, it’s kind of ridiculous to put it in a headline.
Also, some of the things that happened with my brother Reese’s team were definitely not good. Or legal.
But overall, the scavenger hunt was a HUGE SUCCESS. We raised $8,748.75 for the Manhattan Food Bank, which is TOTALLY AMAZING. A LOT of hungry people got to eat decent meals thanks to our scavenger hunt.
Not that you’d know any of this from reading the stupid New York Star.
Which, again, is why I’m writing this history, based on interviews with everyone involved. Ed. Note: except people who wouldn’t talk to me Because, as the person who not only had the idea for the hunt but also organized it, all this misinformation has been very painful and frustrating.
The fact that there will not be a Second Annual Scavenger Hunt—because Vice Principal Bevan has banned them forever—is also very frustrating.
And honestly, I think Mrs. Bevan overreacted. Nobody actually filed a lawsuit. Those were just empty threats. Ed. Note: (so far)
REESE
All I can say is, none of the bad stuff that happened on our team was my fault. Most of the laws we broke, I didn’t even know were laws. So those shouldn’t count.
And none of it would’ve happened in the first place if Dad had done a better job of being our team chaperone.
I don’t want to throw Dad under the bus or anything. But that was pretty much the whole problem right there.
Mom’s still really mad at him for it.
MOM AND DAD (Text messages copied from Mom’s phone)
(MOM) FYI, Claudia is writing another
oral history
(DAD) About what?
Guess
Bingo
OMG. You’re not letting her use
our texts again, are you?
why not?
BECAUSE I WILL LOOK LIKE WORST
PARENT IN HISTORY
Also worst husband. Don’t forget that
I know! I am sorry for 100th time! Please
please please don’t let C use texts
I won’t
thank you!!!!
unless I’m lying. Because we know ALL
ABOUT lying to people in text messages,
DON’T WE ERIC??
I am so so so very very sorry
so you won’t let her use texts, right?
right?
honey?
no comment Ed. Note: Thanks, Mom!