BAD KING JOHN

A LACKLUSTER LEGACY (ENGLAND)

REIGN: 1199–1216

FATHER: Henry II / MOTHER: Eleanor of Aquitaine

SUCCESSOR: Henry III

OTHER NAMES: John Lackland, John Softsword

WHAT WAS SO TERRIBLE ABOUT KING JOHN?

Suspicious. Treacherous. Greedy. Cowardly. Those are some of the nicer adjectives people used to describe King John during his reign. In fact, people today don’t think much more of him. The British people recently voted King John one of the worst kings in English history and the worst person in the entire thirteenth century! John earned this reputation through his self-serving policies and cruelty to everyone around him.

BAD BLOOD

John was part of a family so bad that everyone called them “the Devil’s Brood”: the Plantagenet royal family, which started in France and came to rule over England and Scotland. John wasn’t expected to become king. The youngest of five boys, he was said to have been a spoiled child. While his brothers were out learning jousting, he stuck to his favorite hobby: collecting jewelry. His father—King Henry II—gave all the good baronies and dukedoms to his older brothers so John got the nickname Lackland.

John’s older brothers died, leaving only Richard the Lionheart (see here), who became king once their father died. As is obvious from his nickname, Richard was considered very brave. He went off to fight in the Crusades in the Holy Land. But when he was on his way back in 1192, he was captured and imprisoned by the king of Austria. John saw this as an opportunity. If Richard stayed in prison, John would get to be king. So John bribed Richard’s captor to keep his brother in jail.

Richard was eventually freed and heard of John’s attempt at bribery. But he forgave John because “he was only a child” (he was twenty-seven). When Richard died in 1199, John started a war to prevent his nephew Arthur from getting the throne. Then Arthur conveniently “disappeared,” leaving no more threats to John’s position as king. He took up the throne months after Richard died.

BAD BEHAVIOR

John had a way of making enemies wherever he went. Before he became king, his father sent John to rule Ireland as a lord. But once there, John laughed at the local chiefs who came to greet him and pulled their beards (beards were really uncool in England back then). Annoyed, the local chiefs united against him, and John fled back to England only a few months later.

ROBIN HOOD AND KING JOHN: THE TRUE STORY

Robin Hood, the outlaw of Sherwood Forest, stole from the rich and gave to the poor. He constantly outsmarted Bad King John. That story has endured for centuries, but how true is it?

Some historians think someone named Robin Hood might have lived after the time of King John, and that his story somehow got blended with the true story of Fulk FitzWarin. King John and Fulk were actually childhood friends. The story goes that they got into a fight while playing chess, and John broke the chessboard over Fulk’s head. Fulk then kicked John in the stomach. John eventually got back at Fulk once they were adults by giving away Fulk’s land to his enemy. Fulk then murdered the enemy and became an outlaw, living in the woods and fighting off John’s men for years. They later made up, until Fulk once again turned against John and sided with the barons, who made John sign the Magna Carta.

This is just one of the origin stories for the Robin Hood legend. We’ll probably never know the whole truth, but Robin Hood’s story has inspired storytellers for generations.

LACKLAND VS. LIONHEART

Two brothers; two memorable nicknames. Richard gets all the glory for his brave “lionhearted” adventures in the Crusades, but he wasn’t actually such a superstar in real life. Despite being the king of England, he could barely speak English and only spent about six months of his life there (the Plantagenet royal family was from France and had extended their rule into England). He hated the country because it was too cold and rainy. He taxed people heavily and even declared war on his own father!

John was definitely bad, but he did do some things right. He was the first in his family to speak English as his first language. He built the Royal Navy, which later became England’s strongest suit in becoming a conquering power. John also gave away much of England’s territory in France, which actually helped England become more English. After his time, kings and barons actually spoke English and dropped their old connections to France. And signing the Magna Carta was the first step toward English democracy (even though that wasn’t John’s intention). In the end, some of John’s minuses turned into pluses for the people of England. But he could never live down his terrible (and well-deserved) nickname.

John even laughed at the priest during his own coronation. The barons of his lands in France decided to switch teams and join the king of France rather than serve him, so King John went to war with them. He lost, however, and gained the new nickname of Softsword.

The English also hated King John because he taxed them so much for his failed war. When King John picked a fight with the pope, he was banished from the Catholic Church. John retaliated by banning most church services in England for six years. This made people hate him even more, because going to church was one of the few “fun” things for ordinary people to do. Finally, the English barons forced King John to sign the Magna Carta, which stated that even a king is not above the law. Good news for the people, bad news for kings everywhere.

BAD LUCK

King John had no intention of keeping the promises he made in the Magna Carta, so he gathered an army to fight against the barons who made him sign it. Unfortunately for him, the dauphin (prince) of France decided to invade England at just the same time. King John fled his castle, and being suspicious, he brought his entire treasury with him—jewels, gold, crowns, and all. While traveling through a marsh, the tide came in, and all those precious treasures washed away, leaving him penniless.

King John died three days later, some say from grief, some say from eating rotten peaches or from poisoning. Treasure hunters today still look for his gold in a place called “King John’s Hole.”

King John’s Legacy

Even though he withdrew his support for it right away, the Magna Carta that King John signed was a very important document, making it possible for England to develop a government beyond the king’s total control in the future.

IF YOU HAD LIVED IN KING JOHN’S ENGLAND… YOU PROBABLY WOULD HAVE:

shared your room with pigs and chickens

spent a lot of time picking lice and fleas out of your hair

had a sneaking suspicion that the old lady next door with the hairy wart was a witch

been engaged to be married already if you were over eight years old