courtesy of Aleksandra Jassem.
- Make open communication with your partner (and all family members, for that matter) your top priority. Having kids is trying, and there is a lot of opportunity for miscommunication, which can lead to fights of epic proportions. Who’s got time for that?
- Accept that your kids will probably prefer their grandparents to you. They’re supposed to. One day, you too will get to be the fun grandparent and feed your grandkids sugar cubes for dessert, but, for now, you’re stuck with the role of Buzz Killington.
- Don’t fall into the trap of doing everything on the domestic front. Just because you’re a mom, that doesn’t automatically mean you are also a secretary and maid. If you’re drowning in chores, remember that the easiest way to get your partner to do more around the house is to stop picking up the slack.
- Don’t bother getting upset with people over petty shit like who was(n’t) able to attend a birthday party or a baptism or whatever. It really isn’t the end of the world. Sometimes people are just too busy, as you will inevitably be, too.
- Your kids will flip-flop between loving you the most and loving your partner the most. Enjoy the times when you’re the chosen one, and don’t get all mopey when you’re not. This little game is very predictable. It will be your turn again soon, so relax.
- The concept of “bouncing back” is a load of patriarchal horseshit. You officially have permission to not bounce back, okay? Just bounce yourself into a new normal. As long as you own it, it’ll be sexy AF.
- Try to not get super offended when not all public spaces are child friendly, accessible, or even safe. Not everyone prioritizes these little beings, and that’s just the world we live in. Don’t waste too much of your precious (read: limited) energy being pissed about it.
- Ignore people’s opinions about what you choose to do in your leisure time. Free time is not an easy thing to come by, so when you get it, do whatever the fuck you want. What other people think of you is none of your business. Go live.