Play with Cupid’s Bow
In traditional Tantra, Yoga, and Ayurveda, it is believed that there is a set of psychic nerves, known as nadis, which exist within the body. This system of nadis is analogous to the more familiar system of meridians and points utilized in acupuncture and shiatsu. There is no need to become familiar with the entire system, or even to believe that the nadis have any physical reality. Indeed, Western science does not recognize the existence of meridians, acupuncture points, or nadis. Nevertheless, acupuncture and shiatsu can be effective treatments, so it seems that, whether or not the practitioners who developed these systems were literally right about the details, they were onto something significant. The same can be said about Leonardo da Vinci, whose drawing of a nerve connecting the breasts and the uterus was anatomically incorrect but still revealed an important phenomenon (the potential in some to experience orgasm through nipple stimulation alone). You may find something similar as you experiment with Shanka Nadi (literally, “conch channel”). Let your experience be your guide.
It is believed that the psychic nerve known as Shanka Nadi runs from the upper lip to the genitals. The traditional teaching is that it is only present in women, connecting the upper lip with the clitoris, but in our experience anatomy is no barrier to feeling the sensation. For those of us who are wired to feel it, the most important thing is self-awareness and attention. It is not a huge, intense, erotic charge, but more like a subtle tingle in the genitals.
In the traditional form of the practice it is believed that a man should suck a woman’s upper lip while the woman simultaneously sucks on his lower lip. We have experimented with reversing these recommended roles and have found that we both can feel the sensation if we pay close attention.
Awareness of the erotic potential in this part of the body exists across cultures and finds some support in recent scientific research. The anatomical term for it, philtrum, means “love potion” in Latin, and it gives the lips their Cupid’s bow shape. According to some systems of facial analysis, both Western and Chinese, a wide philtrum indicates that the person has sex appeal or a high sex drive.21 Perhaps more surprisingly, a recent, peer-reviewed study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine concludes that a prominent “tubercle of the upper lip” (the base of the philtrum) “was associated with greater odds . . . of ever having a vaginal orgasm.”22
In acupuncture, there is a point on the philtrum that is used to revive patients who have fainted, are in shock, or have drowned.23 It is believed that the point excites the central nervous system and causes an increase in blood pressure and blood flow to the brain, all of which can also have an impact on sexual arousal. Whether or not these claims, Eastern or Western, are true, their ubiquity is a testament to the power of this body part that is hiding in plain sight.
One final word on sucking on the upper lip (although it also applies to any technique in this book). Some time ago, we taught a couple about Shanka Nadi. We sent them home to experiment, and when they returned a few weeks later, they confessed that it felt a little bit awkward to kiss this way all the time and that they missed kissing the way they always had. We were stunned; we had not suggested they should give up their usual way of kissing. We assured them that sucking on the philtrum was something to add to their existing repertoire, not a replacement for it. So see what happens when you add this to the mix. You may find that it gives your kissing a little extra spice.