Afterword
This has been quite a journey for me writing this book, as I am sure it was for you to read and work with it. The event of our death is shrouded in hidden fear. Bringing our fear into the open confronts us with many things. From the time I confronted my death, as I wrote in the beginning of the book, I have had a passion to know what is needed to prepare for the most important event of our lifetime, but it was not an easy book for me to write.
Going through the writing process, I uncovered something very important and revealing for me. What I uncovered and deeply learned was to put everything in place for my family and not to leave any broken emotional ties with others unresolved. It became very clear that I could not leave this life without all those relationships healed. I learned that I want to be clear with my caregivers on what I need during the death process and after I die. Most important, I came to understand the practices that will prepare my mind to be in a place of open awareness without distractions as I am dying. I am now actually curious about the final step of my death, rather than being driven by fear and avoiding it. However, beyond this openness to face my death without fear was the wonderful discovery that I could live in freedom from fear now in my life. The practices that enabled me to face my constricted self governed by fear was also the practices that could awaken me to my expanded true self.
If you read the book and did not do any of the exercises, you may have missed the point of the book. This is not a book just for the cognitive mind. Yes, it is filled with information, but it is for you to experience the meditations and practice the exercises. These experiences will give you the unique understanding of preparing you for your death as well as how to live a more expanded life today. The exercises can be practiced many times to help you to release from your constricted self and awaken you to your expanded self so that you can live a life of love and joy now as well as when you pass through the transition from this life to beyond. Practice the exercises in order to keep questioning and to uncover more about yourself so that you can open more into your heart. Your heart is your “home base” for living your life in freedom.
As you know now from reading the book, death is not easily faced alone, so my vision is that you work in groups to encourage each other to move forward in the process. Bring a group of your friends or family together. Take the book into your religious and spiritual communities, into men and women’s circles, or social groups to find people who would work as a group. In such a group, share, learn, and support each other in this amazing adventure of a heart and mind that is courageous, curious, and embracing both your death and the vitality of your life.
The process of preparing for your death and awakening to a more vital life now is a gift to your community. Be a light wherever you find yourself. You can share your life and the end of your life with a circle of family and friends so they will be aware of your preferences and how you want to die with all the practical considerations about caregivers to legal concerns, so when it is your time to die you will feel confident that your wishes will be fulfilled. As you may recall, my first intention in writing this book was for my family. I wanted my family members, individually and together, to be prepared for each of our deaths. I am committed to my family and to help each other to awaken now and in our dying. Your willingness to prepare for your death is a gift to yourself, but it is also a gift to your family and friends. To embrace your end of life and to awaken to your expanded self is the great journey of our life. I truly wish you well and hope this book has been a useful guide for you whatever your path or beliefs.