Joanie had a cousin with braces and a cousin that was slow and those two cousins were sisters. And one time when I was at Joanie’s house, those cousins came over because the one with the braces was going to prom and she wanted to show Joanie’s family her dress. While the braces one twirled in the living room the slow one kept putting her arms into her shirt so she looked dismembered. But nobody seemed to pay attention to what she was doing except me. Her name was Tina.
Tina sometimes sat around and tried to see how long she could hold her breath, her cheeks puffed out like the marshmallow challenge. Her sister with braces was named Bri and she was going to the prom with the preacher’s son who got paralyzed in a drunk driving accident. He was really handsome and it was really sad. All the daddies got together and built him a ramp so he could get into the high school building at school.
Joanie kept a picture of Bri and him from the prom in her bedroom. It was on the wall above her lava lamp and at nighttime when she turned it on and it got going, it would goo goo and reflect up on Bri sitting pretty on that preacher boy’s lap, her braces shining. And her pretty pink prom dress glittering like a princess.
Joanie’s favorite color was lime green and her mama let her paint her walls whatever she wanted. So they were lime green and then lime green with a hot pink accent wall. And then lime green with a hot pink accent wall with black stripes.
Joanie had a computer in her bedroom too and we’d play The Sims into the morning, taking turns updating our families. Her goal was to always make her husbands and wives have affairs. And she liked getting the ones with low cooking skills in the kitchen without a fire alarm so they’d catch on fire and die. Or put them in the pool and then take out the ladder so they’d swim to death. She thought it was funny.
My goal was to always have as many children as possible. My husband was Brandon Flowers of The Killers. When me and Mama went to CVS, I saw them in the Rolling Stone magazine and I read in there that he was Mormon so it all made sense to me to have as many children as possible with him on the Sims. Joanie didn’t like the Killers, she liked 50 Cent. She didn’t like to read like me either. But she was really good at basketball. She always scored when she shot. And the boys loved her and were sending her notes all the time.
Joanie only saw her real daddy on special occasions. He lived far away with his new family. I never saw him myself. Joanie lived with her mama and stepdaddy and half brother. He was a baby and it was fun to play with him and tote him around and give him piggyback rides. His breath always smelled like pickles.
Joanie’s cousin who was a little slow named Tina had this blankie she carried around with her that was full of holes like she’d worn it slam out. And one time when her and her sister, Bri, came over, Joanie’s mama got all of us girls out in the front yard to take some pictures in front of her azaleas because they were blooming so big and she was so proud of them. So it was me and Joanie and Bri and Tina and I was next to Tina and she kept stroking my arm up and down with that blankie while we were standing there trying to take that picture. “She likes you,” Joanie said.
Nobody knows this but I sucked my thumb until I was in the third grade and that was something I was embarrassed about. I was also really bad at math and had to stay in and write my multiplication tables with the boys writing sentences for misbehaving, while everyone else was outside going down the big slide.
When we were out by the azaleas then I picked a buttercup from the yard and held it up under Tina’s chin and when it reflected yellow on her skin, I told her she liked butter. She called me Buttercup after that. Yellow has always been my favorite color.
Joanie ended up having a baby and moving to Greenville to be a waitress. Bri did good and got her dental hygiene degree. She works in Dr. Outland’s office, married a big farmer and don’t want for nothing anymore. Only time I see Tina now is when Bri and her mama bring her into the café to eat on Sundays. She hugs my neck when she sees me and they put a bib on her like a baby. She’s a full grown woman like me now.