ROADMAP TO THE PERFECT FIRST DATE
First dates can be as terrifying as they are exciting. Figuring out what to wear, where to go, and what to do are challenging when you don’t know someone very well. Remember, not all your first dates will go well. They’re more about your connection with another person than they are about making the right dinner reservation. But with a little planning, you can alleviate the anxiety involved and create the atmosphere in which a perfect first date can happen. Above all, rely on these clichés that actually hold true—act with respect, be yourself, and have fun.
PREPARE 
• Know where you’re going and what you’re going to do. Planning shows initiative and confidence.
• Clean your car and get some cash, just in case an activity pops up in which you need it.
• Dress appropriately, making sure your clothes are clean and ready well before your date.
PICKUP
• Arrive on time and be sure to notify your date in the unfortunate event that you’re running late.
• Compliment her on the way she looks.
• Escort her from her door to your car and open the car door for her.
DRIVE
• Engage her in friendly conversation, asking her questions instead of talking about yourself.
• Don’t crank up the tunes. If you want music, play something simple and pleasant, like old jazz.
DATE
• Avoid the movies; you can’t talk and learn more about each other.
• Do something active; a casual hike or a museum visit elicits conversation.
• Pay for everything.
DOOR
• Walk her to her door.
• Tell her you had a wonderful time and thank her for coming out.
• Offer a kiss or a hug if you feel it’s appropriate, but don’t make a move beyond that, even if she invites you in. You’re a gentleman.
FOLLOW-UP
• Call her the next day to thank her again for the date.
• At a later time, and if things went well, ask her if she’d like to go on a second date.
OPEN A DOOR FOR A WOMAN
Chivalry isn’t dead. It’s alive anytime a man goes out of his way to offer a helping hand, a kind gesture, or a sincere remark. Perhaps the easiest and most conventional way to display chivalry toward women is the act of opening a door. Some people in our modern, gender-egalitarian world think this tradition should be left in the dustbin of history. But if employed properly, chivalric rituals symbolize our differences as men and women while recognizing our equal worth. Rules and traditions give life texture and meaning. Sameness is boring. Difference creates attraction.
1: DON’T knock her over to get to the door first. Some men, eager to show off, will rush to the door to ensure they arrive before a woman does. Don’t do that. The key to good manners is to make your efforts look effortless.
2: IF she doesn’t want the door opened for her, respect that. Some women will tell you straight up that they don’t like doors opened for them. Fair enough. Don’t make a federal case of it.
3: IF she starts opening the door for herself, just pull it open further. If your lady arrives at the door first and starts opening it on her own, all you need to do is to help pull the door open further. Don’t brush her hand off the doorknob or door handle and don’t offer any sanctimonious “I insist” or “allow me” entreaties. Don’t make a big deal about it.
4: IF the door swings in, go through the door first and hold it for her. Doors that open inward are tricky. Go through these doors before your date does in order to hold the door open for her. If she arrives at the door first and begins pushing the door open, stand on the side of the door hinges and simply extend your arm over her head to take the door’s weight from her as she passes through.
5: ONLY open car doors if there’s nothing obstructing you. If there’s not much room between your car and the car parked next to you, let her open her own door. Don’t force a gesture it’s just not possible to perform.
6: BEFORE shutting a car door, make sure all appendages, skirt bottoms, and purse straps are inside the vehicle. Don’t ruin your date by slamming her foot in the door or tearing her dress.
7: DON’T feel obligated to open the car door for her when exiting the vehicle. Most people get out of a car as soon as it parks. Opening a car door so your date can exit will probably require awkward maneuvering. You’ll create a spectacle that may make your date feel like she’s being chauffeured instead of courted.
8: OPEN doors regardless of gender. Holding doors open isn’t something you need to do just for women. It’s an act of common courtesy you can show to any person. A gentleman should always hold the door open for someone who is more physically burdened than he is. If you see an older person, a person with an obvious physical ailment, or a person holding a large package, hold the door.
And when someone opens a door for you, smile and say, “Thank you!”
LEARN TO DANCE
It takes two to tango. But whether you’re looking to move to a lively salsa number, sway to the timeless sounds of a waltz or jazz standard, or start to swing—you need to start with the basics: the box step.
1: START with your feet together and your weight on your right foot.
2: STEP forward with your left foot and then to the side on your right foot.
3: BRING your feet together and transfer your weight to your left foot.
4: STEP back with your right foot and then to the side with your left foot.
5: BRING your feet together and transfer your weight to your right foot to set up to begin again.
HELP A WOMAN WITH HER COAT
You’ve seen it in silver-screen classics. A dapper gentleman suavely and effortlessly helps his date put on her coat before they head out on the town. While your date is certainly capable of putting her own coat on, this is a simple way to show some consideration. But like opening a door for a woman, helping her put on her coat is easy to bungle—leaving both of you feeling awkward. Remember, the goal of courtesy is to make others feel comfortable, not awkward.
1: GET in position. Stand about a foot behind your date and slightly to her right. Hold her coat open wide at about waist level to provide easy access to the arm holes.
2: SLIDE the coat up. Once your date has her hands and wrists in the armholes, gently slide the coat up her arms and over her shoulders.
3: LET her do the finishing touches. Back away and let her button herself up and pull her hair out from beneath the coat collar.
4: REMOVING her coat. Removing her coat is simple. Just stand behind her and catch the coat as it slides off her shoulders. Hold it while she slides her arms out.
Remember, the goal of courtesy is to make others feel comfortable, not awkward.
TABLE MANNERS AND ETIQUETTE
Our society has become casual. But that doesn’t mean manners can be thrown out the window when you’re at the table with important guests. Learn the basics and practice at home, even if it means laying your napkin properly before scarfing down another slice of pizza on the couch.
GENERAL DINING ETIQUETTE 
1: PLACE your napkin across your lap, bringing it out only to wipe your mouth as needed.
If you leave the table, place the napkin to the left of your plate until you return.
2: START by using the silverware at the outside of your place setting. As courses progress, use silverware closer to your plate.
3: BRING food up to your mouth rather than leaning over, chew with your mouth closed, and do not talk while chewing.
Don’t start eating until the majority of the table has begun.
WHEN ATTENDING A DINNER PARTY
Make an effort to try everything served by your host.
1: ALWAYS bring a gift, like flowers or a bottle of wine.
2: TAKE appropriately sized servings, making sure you leave enough for everyone, and always ask others to pass dishes that are out of your reach.
3: OFFER to help clean up and make sure to thank your host before leaving.
MASTER CLASSIC BAR TRICKS
These classic bar tricks, or “Tab Payers,” inspired by Esquire’s 1949 Handbook for Hosts, are alternately clever and goofy. Either way, you can use them to win a drink in a good-natured wager at the bar, or use them to break the ice at a party.
The Wager
THAT YOU can tell which way the match heads face in a closed match box.
The Payoff
BALANCE THE match box on a table knife; the side containing the match heads will be heavier.
The Wager
THAT IF you and a friend take turns picking up 1, 2, or 3 pennies from a pile, no matter how many pennies your companion picks up, you’ll be able to make him draw last.
The Payoff
LAY DOWN a pile of exactly 17 pennies and ask your friend to pick first. Make sure the total number of pennies taken in each round is 4. If he takes 1, you take 3; if he takes 2, you take 2, if he takes 3, you take 1. You’ll always win.
The Wager
THAT YOU can hold a napkin at the two ends and, without letting go, tie it into a knot.
The Payoff
FOLD YOUR arms before you grasp the ends of the napkin; when you unfold them the napkin will have a beautiful knot.
The Wager
THAT YOUR companion can’t take off his coat by himself.
The Payoff
AS SOON as he begins, you start taking off your coat with him.
The Wager
FILL ONE shot glass with whiskey; fill a second shot glass with water. Offer to transfer all the whiskey into the water shot glass and all the water into the whiskey shot glass WITHOUT using a third vessel of any kind (including your mouth).
The Payoff
PLACE A business card over water glass, covering the rim completely. Turn it upside down, and place it on top of the whiskey glass. Pull the card out slightly to create a crack between the two glasses. The whiskey will slowly rise into the top glass and the water will sink into the bottom glass.
The Wager
THAT YOUR friend, standing with his left ankle, knee, hip, shoulder, and cheek pressed against the wall, can’t lift his right leg off the floor.
The Payoff
HE CAN’T.
The Wager
THAT YOU can remove a dollar bill from under an inverted bottle without touching or upsetting the bottle.
The Payoff
BEING CAREFUL not to touch the bottle with your hands, roll up the bill in such a way that the rolled portion gradually pushes the bottle off the bill and onto the table.
The Wager
THAT YOU can transfer water in a saucer to a glass without moving it.
The Payoff
HOLD A lighted match under the glass for a few moments; then place the inverted glass in the saucer and the water will mysteriously be drawn to it.
The Wager
THAT YOU can stay under water for any specified length of time.
The Payoff
HOLD A glass of water over your head for the period agreed… then run, don’t walk, to the closest exit.
Play the game for more than you can afford to lose… only then will you learn the game.
—Winston Churchill
GRILL A PERFECT STEAK
The smell of searing meat over an open flame brings us back to a primal state. Whether you prefer the fatty goodness of a ribeye, the lean and clean flavor of a flank, or a good old-fashioned T-bone, the keys to perfection are proper heat and timing.
1: CLEAN and prepare your gas or charcoal grill for high, direct heat.
2: SEASON your steak with sea salt, fresh-ground pepper, and a little olive oil.
3: PLACE the steak directly on the grill grate. For every inch of steak thickness, cook each side for ~4 minutes.
4: CHECK the temperature with a meat thermometer and pull the steak off 10 degrees before it hits your ideal final temp. It will continue cooking after you pull it off the grill.
5: ALLOW the steak to rest for at least half the time it was cooked.
6: CUT the steak against the grain for more tender slices. You can determine the direction of the grain by looking at which way the muscle fibers are running.
Determining a steak’s grain may be easier before you grill it.