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Solution Tool 4: Adjust Your Outlook

WHAT YOU BELIEVE MATTERS!

Sometimes it’s the way you see an issue that causes the problem. Have you ever noticed how two people can face the same situation—getting fired, being discriminated against, or being convicted of a crime—and one becomes successful in spite of it, while the other becomes a victim of circumstance? Often, the difference is their outlook. What you believe matters, because it determines your actions and attitudes. Identifying and adjusting the outlooks that are holding you back can help you achieve your goals.

Why do some people seem to have all the luck—even when bad things happen to them they bounce back? It’s usually because of their outlook. How we view the world determines how we handle the things life throws at us. That is why two people who experience the same situation can end up with different results. Take the example of two brothers who were abused by an alcoholic father. One became an abusive alcoholic, just like his father. The other was kind, sober, and successful, just the opposite of his father. When asked how they became who they are, both men answered, “Look at my father. How could I have become anything else?” Imagine two workers laid off when their jobs moved offshore. For one, it was a reason to give up control of his life and his hope for the future. For the other, it was an opportunity to start a new career. Both would say, “I was unexpectedly laid off. What else could I do?” Faced with the same situation, they experienced very different results. Their outlook made the difference.

Your outlook determines both your attitudes and actions, and it’s often a combination of the two that gets you hired, or screened out. To understand the power of your outlook, think of it as a filter through which everything you experience in life passes. This filter determines how you react, because it colors how you see the world. If you have a clean filter, whether the water poured into it is clean or dirty the inevitable result is clean water. Conversely, it doesn’t matter if you pour dirty or clean water into a dirty filter—you’re going to get dirty water. So it’s not what gets poured into the filter that determines what you get; it’s the filter. A dirty mental filter is sometimes referred to as “stinkin’ thinkin’,” because it can pollute our lives, relationships, future opportunities, and happiness. If you don’t like the results that your current outlook is producing, choose a new outlook that will produce new attitudes, actions, and results. Remember what Henry Ford said, “Whether you believe you can or believe you can’t, you’re right.”

We’re here to help you achieve your goals, so we refer to outlooks not as right or wrong, but as constructive or destructive in reaching your goals. If an outlook helps you attain your goal, it’s constructive. If it hinders you from reaching your goal, it’s destructive. To discover if your current outlook is constructive or destructive, evaluate if you are getting closer to attaining your goals, or if your efforts have stalled. If you’re stalled, you may think your situation is different, and that you are justified in blaming your circumstances rather than your outlook for the results you are getting—as did the brother who became an abusive alcoholic and the laid-off worker who gave up. No matter what issue you face, it’s likely that others have faced it and are now working and achieving their dreams. It can be done. The question is whether you are willing to adjust your outlook so it can happen for you.

Adopting a new outlook starts with self-examination. Begin noticing your outlook every time you don’t get the results you want. Next, find someone who is getting the results you want, notice his outlook, and begin to emulate him. What attitudes does he project? What actions does he take? If you know someone like this personally, ask her what she says to herself when destructive outlooks creep in. Replace what you are saying to yourself with something that will help you get the results you want. No one is hiring may become Good jobs will be filled today and I only need one. And No one is going to hire me once they realize . . . can become Other people with the same issue have overcome it, and I can, too. Adopting a positive mantra can also help—I’d be great at this job. I just need to prove it! Memorize your key message and verbalize it to yourself often to reinforce why the employer would be lucky to get you. Make a list of your goals, or find an inspiring picture, and post it where you see it daily to stay focused on achieving your dream. Ask the person you are emulating, or another successful friend, to tell you when he sees you returning to your stinkin’ thinkin’. Be accountable. It’s key in changing old habits and maintaining new ones. Plus, we naturally become like the people we spend time with. Is the outlook of the people you spend time with constructive or destructive to your goals? If it’s destructive, think of ways to spend more time with people who have a constructive outlook.

CREATING SOLUTIONS BY ADJUSTING YOUR OUTLOOK

In the job search, it is particularly important to have a positive and confident outlook. However, when we are unemployed or unhappily employed, it is easy to feel angry, afraid, or depressed. But that’s the problem—most employers only hire people who appear positive and confident. To be hired, you must put aside any rightful anger, fear, or depression, and project a positive and confident outlook. Daniel Porot, a pioneer in the field of career design and job hunting,¹ teaches a concept he calls Job Beggar/ Resource Person. It highlights the differences between a resource person, who employers want to hire, and a job beggar, who they screen out. Over time, we have found it useful to divide job beggars into “depressed” and “desperate.”

Let’s consider the outlooks of all three so you understand how employers might view you, and decide if you want to make any adjustments. Depressed Job Beggars appear defeated, tired, discouraged, defensive, and entirely focused on themselves and their problems. This outlook is reflected in their presentation, body language, and voice tone. They haven’t bothered researching the company, crafting good answers, or developing selling points to prove they meet the employer’s needs, because they believe no one will hire them anyway. During an interview, if they get one, nothing about the work lights up their eyes, their answers are brief and poorly thought out, and they don’t ask questions, so the interviewer feels like an interrogator. Employers sense that if hired, the person will require a lot of extra work.

Desperate Job Beggars appear the other extreme. Their outlook can be anxious and frantic, or angry and challenging, but always their desperation shows through. And, like all job beggars, they focus on themselves and their needs, rather than what they offer employers. Their desperation is evident in their presentation. They dress to show their importance—rather than dressing just one level up from the job (as we suggest). Their demeanor can be overwhelming as they try to take control of the interview, desperately attempting to convince the employer to hire them. Their answer to a single question can last several minutes, and they often jump from topic to topic, oblivious to the interviewer’s disinterest. Their interviews are not conversations, but monologues. Their eyes light up and they get excited only about things that benefit them—compliments from the interviewer, or discussions about pay or job offers. Even their questions reflect their self-interest—When will the hiring decision be made? What’s the pay? Do you cover moving expenses? Are there opportunities for advancement or paid training? Employers sense that if hired, this person may not work in the company’s best interest.

Resource People appear positive and confident. They are calm and engaging, reflect the company image and personality, and focus not on themselves but on how they can contribute to the company’s success. They greet the interviewer with a warm smile, good eye contact, and a firm handshake. They have done their research in order to prove they match the employer’s needs in each area of PADMAN. They understand the employer’s goals and how they can benefit the company. They have taken the time to craft good answers, determine which stories and examples best prove their point, and insure their actions match their words. During the interview, they keep their answers brief and focused, knowing employers will ask if they want more information. They ask questions about the company’s needs, not their own—My résumé proves I have all the skills you’ve asked for, but I know to be great at any job it takes more. What makes someone great at this job? Or What record would I need to break to be a top salesperson within the first year? Their questions are often designed to allow them to share an additional selling point. For example, I noticed on your website that you are hoping to expand into ABC. Have you run into any difficulties in sourcing XYZ? . . . I have a couple of good contacts if you’re interested. Lastly, Resource People’s eyes light up as they share their passion and enthusiasm for the field, the job, or the company. Employers view them as someone who can help solve problems and increase profit. They are seen as a person who has options, who will be hired by someone else if the employer doesn’t grab them now.

➵ DID YOU KNOW?

The questions you ask, or don’t ask, during an interview can be as insightful for the interviewer as your answers to their questions. Our suggestion is to always ask at least three questions during the interview. At least two-thirds must focus on issues that benefit the employer. Limit the questions that focus on issues that profit you, such as opportunities for advancement and benefits the company offers.

Which one sounds most like you? If you want to be a Resource Person but can’t get past your depression or desperation, remember it’s about perception. Decisions are based not on what is true, but what is perceived to be true. If you copy the actions and project the attitudes of a Resource Person, you’ll be seen as a Resource Person. You may also be surprised at how quickly you attract other Resource People, and truly become one yourself.

If your outlook is getting you screened out, use these ideas to adjust it. However, it’s not just your outlook that may require adjusting, sometimes it’s the employer’s. The next chapter offers a proven approach for adjusting the employer’s perception of you.