Near-Death Experiences
I encountered my first report of a near-death experience in 1969, though there was no name for it at the time, nor any significant research of which I was aware. That summer, like most summers throughout my college and graduate school years, I was lifeguarding and teaching swimming. Most of my postings were at smaller pools, and any rescues were no more dramatic than simply reaching in to help a wayward child get to the pool’s edge or more shallow water.
In those days, there really was a community of lifeguards. While in different posts, many lifeguards knew others through former postings, swim teams, Red Cross classes, and even shared extracurricular activities such as surfing or scuba. News traveled fast in that network.
In the summer of ’69, one story particularly dominated discussion. There had been a dramatic rescue at Rockaway Beach. Rockaway was considered both one of the most popular but one of the most dangerous beaches in New York City. The Rockaway peninsula separates the Atlantic Ocean from Jamaica Bay. The beach is known for large waves, dangerous currents, and undertows. Compared to other beaches, it has more than its share of rescue and, regrettably, sometimes a drowning. Lifeguards there need to be particularly alert.
Happily, Sam, a more senior guard, was that vigilant. On this summer day, he kept his eye on a young boy bobbing with the waves in shoulder-deep water. Suddenly, after a large wave, the boy disappeared. Sam immediately jumped in and, after a short search, found the boy unconscious, floating under the surface. As soon as Sam brought the unconscious boy to shore, he began mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. After a few minutes, the boy began to revive—regurgitating bile, seawater, and vomit—unfortunately right into Sam’s mouth. As another lifeguard stepped in to continue treatment, Sam retreated to his locker to clean up.
As the boy revived, he looked around and asked, “Where’s Sam?”
The very question made the guards shudder. Had there been another boy left to drown? But the boy soon clarified, “Sam—the blond lifeguard, the one who rescued me.”
Since he was unconscious during the rescue, the guards asked how he knew it was Sam. The boy replied, “I saw him. I watched the whole thing. I saw everything.”
When asked if he was scared, the boy stated that it was peaceful, but he wanted to come back because his mother was crying so hard.
When the ambulance arrived to take him to the hospital for a check-up, the boy refused to go until he could thank Sam. Sam was summoned. As he approached the child, the boy excitedly called, “That’s Sam!” The boy, and his mother, then profusely thanked Sam.
The story began to make the rounds, told and retold to lifeguards at varied postings. The account generated considerable interest. To some, it was an unnecessary embellishment of an already-remarkable rescue. Other guards insisted that as the boy revived, he simply heard guards retelling the story. Still others, like me, were simply mystified by the story.
Years later, I would recall it as the first report of a near-death experience (NDE) that I ever encountered.
That recollection would take place in 1977—two years after Dr. Raymond Moody published, and when I finally read, his classic book, Life after Life. In that work, Moody documented accounts similar to that drowning boy—all experienced on the brink of death—and coined the term near-death experiences.
Of all the unusual experiences recounted in this book, near-death experiences have generated the most research and interest, as well as numerous books. Researchers and persons interested in the field have created a professional association, The International Association for Near Death Studies (IANDS) and a professional journal—Anabiosis: The Journal for Near-Death Studies.49
Even before Moody popularized and coined the term in 1975, medical journals reported such experiences over a century ago.50 Religious books like the Tibetan Book of the Dead, as well as scriptures from virtually all faiths 51 and historical accounts attest to such experiences. In fact, the ancient Greek myth of Orpheus seems to share characteristics of near-death experiences. In the myth, Orpheus is a poet and singer known for the beauty of both his voice and poetry. He becomes despondent when his beloved wife, Eurydice, dies. Orpheus travels to the underworld where his music softens the hearts of the gods of the underworld—Hades and Persephone. They agree to release her—but under one condition, Eurydice will follow him to the surface, but Orpheus must not look back until they both arrive on earth. However, once Orpheus reaches safety, he does look back only to see his wife disappear forever.
That individuals have near-death experiences is indisputable. However, what causes such experiences, the elements of such experiences, and their aftereffects is open to, as we shall see in this chapter, much interpretation and debate.
The Nature of Near-Death Experiences
“I had been in a horrific car crash. I heard the doctor pronounce me dead—then there was a terrible ringing sound. My life literally flashed in front of me. I remember floating above everything, even seeing my body on a stretcher as I entered a dark tunnel—yet I felt calm and peaceful. A spirit—mostly light—began to move toward the tunnel. My [deceased] father greeted me but said it was not yet my time—I had to go back. I wanted to argue, to stay—the sense of peace and contentment was so strong—but all of a sudden, I felt like I was jerked back. When I regained consciousness, I was lying in an emergency room.” (Jay, a 38-year-old male)
Jay’s account of his near-death experience (NDE) fits very closely with Dr. Raymond Moody’s description of the archetype NDE. Moody’s 1975 book, Life after Life, was based on his accounts of over one hundred patients who shared their experiences with him. Moody studied persons who were near death—perhaps from some sort of accident, collision, or an acute event such as a heart attack or a drug overdose.52 In many ways, the near-death experience offered “scientific proof” of an afterlife minus any overt religious imagery (though some may see religious figures greeting and guiding). It was and is a comforting perspective to a more secular world.
While Moody attempted to describe an archetype experience that included a series of elements—hearing a pronouncement of death, experiencing a great noise, entering a dark tunnel, reviewing one’s life, seeing other deceased friends and relatives, greetings by figures of light or identified religious figures such as Jesus, being told you had to return, feelings of peace, etc.—he also acknowledged that not everyone experienced all of the components and recognized the uniqueness of each experience. Even so, near-death experiences as described by Moody were positive and life changing. Interestingly, Moody noted that in some cases individuals met people whom they were unaware had died.53
I had one such case. A middle-aged woman recounted her own NDE after she was being resuscitated following a car accident.
As I was approaching this light, my grandmother waved me away. “You have to go back,” she said. “Jim got here first.” I even remember thinking that was odd and funny. Funny, because Jim’s my older brother, and as we were growing up, I always complained that Jim got to do everything first. Odd, since Jim was very much alive. We had just spoken yesterday. When my husband returned home to pick up some things that I would need in the hospital, there was a message to call as soon as I could. My husband returned the call. Jim had a massive coronary, dying about an hour before the crash.
Subsequent research both supported and challenged some of Moody’s initial assumptions. Researchers have certainly validated that NDEs are experienced by a wide range of individuals including children. Interestingly, many of the variables or factors such as age, gender, or religion do not seem to influence whether an individual has an NDE even though they may alter the nature of that experience.
For example, Dr. David Royse’s forthcoming research on the near-death experiences of individuals who had experience with significant burn injuries found that almost 25 percent of them reported an encounter with an angelic being. These beings were seen as both rescuing individuals from the fire—in one case pushing the individual out of a burning cabin—or comforting survivors as they experienced great pain.54
Individuals seem to have NDEs whether or not they are religious or even spiritual. The British philosopher Sir A. J. Ayer was a prominent humanist who served as both president of the Agnostics’ Adoption Society as well as the president of the British Humanist Associations.55 A dedicated atheist and a signer of the Humanistic Manifesto, Ayer was surprised when he had an NDE. Hospitalized with pneumonia, Ayer choked on a piece of fish and went into cardiac arrest for four minutes. In that time, he encountered an unusual experience where he felt responsible for repairing an anomaly in the space-time continuum. The experience profoundly affected Ayer.
He wrote: “My recent experiences have slightly weakened my conviction that my genuine death, which is due fairly soon, will be the end of me, though I continue to hope that it will be. They have not weakened my conviction that there is no God.” Later, Ayer modified his statement, stating: What I should have said is that my experiences have weakened, not my belief that there is no life after death, but my inflexible attitude towards that belief. Nonetheless, Ayer, who built his career on espousing atheism, reportedly told his attending physician, Dr. Jeremy George, who asked Ayer about his NDE, that he clearly saw a divine being and that he was going to have to revise his books and opinions—though he never did—at least publicly.56
Still, Ayer’s account reminds us of another factor. It suggests that near-death experiences are viewed through the prism of our own spirituality. While Ayer’s spirituality did not have room for a divine being, the images evoked mirrored his own philosophical framework—as Ayer thinks he needs to repair an anomaly in the space-time continuum. And when individuals see religious figures, they are likely to encounter and identify spiritual beings from their own faith tradition, be it Jesus or Buddha. Yet while that is true, most accounts of NDEs do not fully conform to popular images of the afterlife. Few report traditional images associated with the afterlife such as pearly gates.
This is clearly evident in recent books that have spoken about another type of near-death experience—actual visits to heaven. In fact, this has almost become a literary genre in Christian bookstores—often becoming best sellers. Perhaps the most famous book of this genre is Heaven Is for Real where Todd Burpo describes the account of their son, Colton’s, visit to heaven after an operation for a burst appendix. Not only was the book successful, it was even made into a movie. In this, and other accounts, heaven is described as a paradise—often with imagery found in Christian scripture. Recently, the author of another such account, Alex Malarkey, who is listed with his father, Kevin, as author of The Boy Who Came Back from Heaven, indicated that his father’s story was not true. This revelation prompted Colton and his family to stand by their accounts. In any case, these accounts of near-death experiences are generally more explicit than Moody described. Here, the image is clearly Christian, and the individual vividly describes entering heaven before being sent back to earth.
Gender also may play a role. Kenneth Ring’s research showed that women reported NDEs while struggling with disease whereas men were more likely to have such an experience with an accident or suicide. Yet even in cases of suicide, the NDEs were generally positive and pleasant.57 And while children also report NDEs, they are more prone to report speaking with deceased relatives or an identified guardian angel. In addition, young children, with little life to recall, rarely mention a life review process.
However, culture and historical times do seem to be significant. Both Allen Kellehear and Gregory Shushan studied NDEs in varied cultures.58 Shushan found that in many indigenous religions, people reported many of the typical features of an NDE, such as an out-of-body experience, seeing their own body, emerging from darkness to a bright light, visiting another realm, encountering beings (both religious figures or departed relatives), reaching a boundary, life review, feelings of joy and deep peace, and a reluctance to go home.59
Yet these experiences generally conformed to the local culture. In some NDEs, participants described flying through clouds or canoeing to an island associated with the dead. In short, different cultures incorporated their own prevailing mythology into these experiences.60
When I was giving workshops in New Zealand in 2006, a Maori (indigenous people to New Zealand) social worker shared with me an NDE he had as he was in an emergency room following a car crash.
I awoke and saw this elder in a hood. He bid me to follow him, so I did. It was like we were walking on air. We came to a lagoon. There was a large canoe. We both entered the canoe. I noted there were no paddles. He simply shrugged. The canoe seemed to go on its own power—gliding on the water. We passed through a fog. Once we were past the fog, he pointed to an island. It was beautiful. I remember seeing a waterfall. Then the boat stopped. The man in the hood said that it was not yet time—we had to go back. The next thing was that I woke up in the emergency room. I heard the nurse say, “I thought we lost him.”
Yet, Shushan also found that in some cultures there were few reports of NDEs. To many African tribes, the dead and the dying were to be feared. Their reports of NDEs were found to be rare, as they were among Australian aborigines. Shushan concludes that NDEs were more common in cultures that had beliefs in souls and an afterlife. Or perhaps they are more likely to be reported and shared in cultures where the dead or death is less of a taboo.61
Subsequent research has emphasized that these experiences are far more diverse than Moody initially reported. For example, sociologist Allan Kellehear compared near-death experiences across different cultures.62 In many areas, Kellehear found dissimilar components from Moody’s descriptions. In a number of areas, individuals who experienced an NDE reported neither any experience of life review nor any sense of a tunnel. In some near-death experiences, participants described flying through clouds or entering a cave.63 In short, different cultures incorporated their own prevailing beliefs into these experiences.
The historical time of NDEs also seems to influence their nature. Pope Gregory I recounted the NDE of a hermit monk. He reported that the man had an experience where he felt himself in hell. The monk noted that he saw some very prominent men dangling in the fire. He himself was rescued from the fire at the last minute by an angel who returned him to the living with words that warned him to take care how he lived his life—reminding him of future judgment. This was consistent with the highly judgmental theology of the time in the Western world.64
Dr. Carol Zaleski has written much about these medieval accounts of near-death experiences.65 In fact, she notes, Pope Gregory I seemed fascinated by such accounts—often sharing them in his Dialogues. Here, in addition to the previous story, he shares two other accounts. In one, Stephen, a merchant, dies and goes before a celestial judge who sends him back to earth as the judge had ordered Stephen the blacksmith to be brought before him. Stephen immediately wakens just as the blacksmith dies. Though this is a case of mistaken identity, Gregory still reminds his reader that the merchant who earlier was unsure about the afterlife now truly believed.
Pope Gregory shares another incident that was meant to be an instructive lesson to readers. Here, a soldier reportedly dies and then revives. He reports that he saw a bridge over a blackened river with a horrid stench. The bridge is a test. Those who walk over it approach a flowery meadow. He sees that same merchant, now deceased from the plague, approach the bridge. On the bridge, Stephen was being pulled by both hideous creatures from below from his waist while angelic features were trying to pull him up by his arms toward the bridge. The soldier awakened before he learned the outcome. To Gregory, it showed the conflict inherent in the man who loved giving to charity but yet had not completely abandoned his carnal vices.
Obviously, both culture and the culture at a given point of history seem to influence the nature of the NDEs. Dr. L. Stafford Betty accounts for these disparities by reminding us that such experiences are described often as being ineffable—not easily described in words. In such cases, individuals who experience an NDE can only attempt to describe using whatever limited vocabulary and framework that their culture offers. If a culture is unfamiliar with tunnels, the experience may well be characterized as a foggy lagoon. And, Betty reminds, the commonalities across culture and time are far more significant than the differences.66
While Moody stressed positive and pleasant experiences, there are other reports that some NDEs are unpleasant—even frightening. Some describe such experiences as ambiguous—such as drifting in a void, perhaps alternating between feelings of freedom and other times being constrained. Others report experiences that are distinctly unpleasant—even terrifying.67
I once counseled an individual, Jesse, who was resuscitated after a drug overdose. He described his experience in this way:
I felt myself drifting as in an abyss. I was falling, but the void seemed endless. Throughout the time, I never saw a bottom. Faces and people would pop out of the walls. They were grotesque—more like ugly gargoyles than demons. They would point to me falling and viciously laugh—seeming to enjoy my plight. I was terrified. One large gargoyle-like being cruelly shouted, “You’ve gone too far.” As I continued the fall, I could hear his words echo throughout the void—”too far, too far …” It might have been part of the drug experience, but I never felt that before—and I had lots of experience with drugs. I remember regaining consciousness in an emergency room. The first thing I asked was whether I was alive. The doctor seemed very judgmental. He said I was very lucky and the next time I might not be so fortunate. Ironically, his voice sounded similar to that mocking gargoyle. I cannot fully remember, I was still in a haze, but I think he even said something like, “You nearly went too far this time.” I remember feeling a bit shocked by that comment and confused. Did he say that earlier? Was he the voice of that gargoyle? I still try to figure out if it was a near-death experience, a drug fueled hallucination, or part of both.
Like Jesse, some individuals encountered frightening experiences with hellish images of profound heat or cold and demonic presences. In other cases, accounts reported struggling to live—perhaps even wrestling or escaping a figure representing death.68
And it is important to remember that most individuals never report a near-death experience! While there is little research on how common such experiences are, studies in the United States and Australia show the prevalence of such experiences to be around 5–15 percent.69 Clearly, this is a relatively small percentage of individuals at risk for such experiences. Yet researchers have been hard pressed to identify personal factors that seem to make individuals more prone to such experiences. There do not seem to be any significant differences in age, gender, intelligence, death anxiety, neurotic tendencies, extraversion, education, occupation, type of community lived in, race, religion, or attendance in worship.70 So this question still remains, why do certain individuals have such experiences when most do not?
The Effects of a Near-Death Experience
Encounters with death inevitably affect the way survivors experience life. Most of the research focuses on those individuals who had positive experiences. Persons who have experienced an NDE often find an altered perception of self. They report being less anxious about death, strengthened beliefs, heightened self-esteem, and a new sense of mission. They believe they returned for and with some purpose.
They also reported that their relationships with others improved. They were more appreciative of others and more likely to express love and affection. People rather than possessions became new priorities. They were less selfish, less materialistic, and more open to helping and nurturing others.
Such individuals also had a greater appreciation for life. Some gave up unhealthy habits such as smoking and exercised more. They reported a new zest for life—and a greater appreciation of the natural world. They now saw beauty where they had not seen it before. Their spirituality was renewed and often combined with a search for knowledge.
They often embraced a heightened sense of spirituality—including a greater openness to ideas they may previously have rejected as unorthodox. They may also become more active adherents of their religion, engaging in greater attendance at worship as well as engaging in private religious practices such as reading scripture and religious books, meditation, and prayer.71
Negative experiences also had effects. Some individuals simply discounted them, attributing them to physiological changes or medication administered as they were on the brink of death. Others perceived these experiences as wake-up calls that generated spiritual or religious conversions or deep changes in the ways they lived their lives. Still others struggle with them—wondering why they merited such an encounter. In these negative experiences, many individuals generally did not find a diminished fear of death. Often, for many, their anxiety heightened.
Yet, such changes are not limited to individuals experiencing NDEs. Rather, they are common for survivors of other crises. In fact, such effects are seen in others such as survivors of mine disasters, persons who were castaways, survivors of terrorist attacks, and even persons surviving a life-threatening illness or accident (without an NDE). And such effects are very similar to grieving persons who, as a result of their loss, experience what we now call post-traumatic growth. The point is that whenever our assumptions of the world are challenged and changed, it often leads individuals to review and reevaluate their lives, as well as to reprioritize their values.
One counselee, a middle-aged woman, had an NDE when she went into a coma-like reaction following a hemorrhage during what was expected to be routine medical procedure. She later described the effect of her NDE.
I was always very busy, running around, active in all the activities of my children’s lives—gymnastics, school, Scouts, church. After the operation, I realized how much I loved my family but how little time we actually spent with one another. We were doing things but in parallel—not really together. After I returned home, I realized how important my family was. We had a family meeting, simplified our lives. The kids are young, so now we have family nights, camp together, play together. I hope I never have an emergency like that again. But I am glad, I think the family is too, that I had it once.
Dr. Sam Parnia sees another potential effect of NDEs—that of erasing death.72 Parnia notes that death is a process and that there is a distinction between clinical death—when there is no heartbeat, pulse, or breathing—and cellular death where the cells die and begin to disintegrate. NDEs occur within that space. In fact, because NDEs take place in that space—after clinical death but prior to cellular death—Parnia suggests calling such encounters “after-death experiences.” Parnia believes that by studying NDEs, we may be able bring more people back from clinical death.
How Can We Explain Near-Death Experiences
While there is little argument that NDEs are experienced by some proportion of the population, there is considerable debate on what accounts for such experiences. A number of these explanations are physiological in nature. Among these factors are starvation and sleep deprivation. The inability to digest food or experiencing starvation in other ways as well as the lack of sleep is known to produce hallucinatory experiences. Another physiological factor that could induce such experiences would be the introduction of toxins. This can result from a number of factors. Both the kidneys and the liver play significant roles in detoxifying our bodies. So renal failure or liver disease interferes with that function. Toxins then introduced in the body can result in significant mental changes including hallucinatory experiences. Similarly, as the body and tissues deteriorate in the dying process, autointoxication can result as cancer, wasting, and other degenerative diseases release toxins. This can be particularly pronounced in diseases such as brain tumors, meningitis or other diseases of the brain, or head injuries that damage the brain. The theory that this is a result of toxins has generally been rejected. The difficulty with these explanations is that they would be more applicable to NDEs that occur within a coma or within the dying process than in other, far more common and sudden situations, such as a near-drowning or cardiac arrest.
A more general physiological factor might be anoxia where there is insufficient supply of oxygen to the brain and, generally as a correlate, an increase in carbon dioxide levels. Depriving the body of oxygen has been used in varied rites to induce trances and other related behaviors. This has been one of the more common and viable physiological explanations for NDEs. But anoxia is present in many conditions, such as cardiac arrest, where no NDEs are reported, as well as not present in other situations where NDEs are described. Kenneth Ring also notes that anoxia could not account for the uniformity of these core experiences nor for the anomalies where the person experiencing the NDE sees an individual they did not realize had died.73
One generally discarded physiological theory is that NDEs are induced by drugs—both those used in treatment as well as illicit use. Certainly, it is conceded that NDEs do share common factors such as out-of-body experiences with reports of persons who have taken hallucinogenic drugs such as LSD. Varied drugs administered during treatments, such as anesthesia, can induce varied and unusual effects. However, research over the years has acknowledged parallels between such experiences but not any chronology. Moreover, NDEs are present even when no drugs, illegal or otherwise, are used. In short, there is little research that indicates drug use—illicit or not—plays any significant role as to whether or not an individual has an NDE.
Other physiological explanations suggest neurochemical processes such as stimulation of the temporal lobe and the release of endorphins and other endogenous opioids. These are neurochemical defenses both to reduce pain and create euphoria to alleviate stress. However, such neurochemical effects are generally far more long-lasting than one normally finds in NDEs. Other physiological explanations have noticed common elements between REM (rapid eye movement) sleep and NDEs—noting that they share common elements such as bright lights and a sense of being both alert and immobilized. Yet such a connection is tentative at best as REM is rare under anesthesia and other aspects of REM such as fear and anxiety are generally not present in NDEs.
Other explanations are more psychological in nature. One of the more esoteric approaches suggests that the stress induced by a life-threatening experience evokes the memory of another traumatic transition—that of birth. After all, elements of the core experience—a tunnel and bright light—certainly are comparable to the birth experience.
Generally, this notion has been dismissed for a number of reasons. First, newborns lack the mental capacities such as language necessary to store and retrieve memories. Second, many experiences of NDEs do not include a tunnel or a bright light. Third, the out-of-body experiences associated with NDEs are not present at birth—that is, infants do not seem to report viewing their own births! Finally, people report these NDEs regardless of whether they were born naturally or through a caesarean procedure.74
Yet, such a dismissal may be premature. Certainly secular, spiritual, and New Age images often describe death as a form of rebirth. In addition, even children as well as adults understand the main components of a birth as discussed in conversations and experienced either directly or in media. I remember when I was at Sloan-Kettering Medical Center in New York City; a mother was comforting her young son in the final stages of leukemia. He had asked her what heaven would be like. She reminded him that he was so comfortable in her womb that he was born two weeks after his due date. It had been a family story that he had been so reluctant to leave. She asked him if he had ever wished to go back. The nine-year-old announced that such an idea was “gross.” She assured him that death would be similar and that once he reached heaven—was reborn—he would feel the same way about coming back. The analogy brought him comfort.
The point is that both images of birth and perceptions of death as a form of rebirth are common in most cultures. Certainly, facing the trauma of death could evoke such images, though it has to be acknowledged that such images evoke only some of the core elements found in NDEs.
Others have studied whether certain personality factors seem to influence the likelihood of an NDE. Most of these studies have been equivocal at best. It also has been suggested that depersonalization is a psychological defense against traumatic events such as an encounter with death. Here, one detaches or disassociates from the experience, becoming more of an observer than a participant in an event. Certainly, this defense could explain some of the phenomena attributed to NDEs.
Some studies, in fact, did find that persons who had experienced an NDE tended to score slightly higher on dissociative scales than controls—but lower than individuals who had dissociative disorders.75 This makes some sense, as persons who have dissociative disorders, such as amnesia or even alternate identities, seek to escape significant traumas by disengaging from the situation. As in all mental disorders, the extent of disassociation impairs the individual’s ability to function in life and allows an unhealthy attempt to escape the current reality. Dr. Bruce Grayson suggests that perhaps individuals who experience NDEs have tendencies that allow them to use such a defense in an adaptive rather than maladaptive manner.76
Still others explain NDEs as a defense against the impending threat of extinction. Here, individuals draw upon their own beliefs and cultural expectations when facing death. The value of such a theory is that it can account for some of the cultural variations found in NDEs. For example, in the West, it is common to hear individuals recount that they were returned because it was not yet their time. In other cultures, they were sent back because their death was an error of the gods.77 Yet others challenge this for a number of reasons. First, while it is undisputed that there are cultural variations in NDEs, generally the core elements are similar. Second, young children, who are likely to have fewer expectations, report experiences similar to adults. Third, some individuals, such as the atheist philosopher A. J. Ayer, have reported experiences quite contrary to their expectations. Fourth, reports of NDEs prior to Moody’s 1975 book are consistent with his descriptions.78 Finally, it is hardly surprising that given the fact that most individuals who have had an NDE—an experience they often claim is indescribable—would use their own personal frames of reference and cultural expectations as they recount that experience.
Lastly, there are spiritual explanations for NDEs. Farnaz Masumian, a teacher of world religions at the University of Texas in Austin, has noted that all the major world religions have images of the afterlife consistent with the reports of individuals who have near-death experiences.79 Can it really be that those individuals who experience NDEs actually stand at the edge of forever and glimpse at the afterlife?
As Betty notes, the empiricist and material nature of science, including social science, easily dismisses such claims.80 Yet Betty offers a strong defense. Certainly, there is a long historical record across cultures of such experiences including those who do not claim to be religious or spiritual. Second, there is a general consistency in accounts—when persons who have had an NDE report they saw a relative or other familiar figure, these other people were inevitably dead—sometimes the death was even unknown to the person experiencing an NDE. Betty questions that hallucinatory experiences are usually much more confused with much mixed material generally not reported by those who have an NDE. Third, Betty reviews research by a team of Dutch physicians 81 that indicates that many NDEs take place with a flat electroencephalogram. It is difficult, if not impossible, to explain how an individual can recount such a vivid experience when there is evidence that the brain was not functioning. Fourth, Betty affirms that in the out-of-body experience many individuals report events or things that they would not normally be expected to know. For example, many describe intricate emergency room procedures that are not common knowledge, while others recounted details such as a shoe on an outside ledge that would not be visible to them. Fifth, the core experiences that Moody depicts are commonly mentioned across cultures and times. Finally, unlike many hallucinatory experiences, NDEs often change the lives of the persons experiencing them.
Betty does acknowledge that the idiosyncratic nature of many NDEs does provide a challenge to the spiritual argument. Why does a Christian see Christ and a Buddhist, Buddha? Why do certain individuals have unique experiences that do not fit these typical patterns? For example, why does Ayer see an anomaly in the time-space continuum when another sees paradise? Betty again uses the argument that we interpret and describe these indescribable experiences through our own prism of experiences and spiritual or philosophical frameworks. And we might ask one additional question—why does such a small minority of individuals actually have such experiences when in a life-threatening encounter?
So which theory best fits the evidence? The answer is that we may never know. None of these theories is really directly testable so, at least for the foreseeable future, it remains a matter of belief. Moreover, the answer may even be “all or some of the above.” NDEs share characteristics with other phenomena such as deep meditation or shamanistic trances, as well as drug-induced hallucinogenic experiences—even if the latter experiences are induced while NDEs seem more spontaneous. NDEs also share characteristics with nearing death awareness (as described in Chapter 2) that in both events persons report seeing deceased persons or guides. It may be there are varieties of factors or perhaps a combination of factors that induce such an experience. Yet, the ultimate question still remains: What do these experiences mean to the person who has experienced a Near-Death Experience—who has peered at the edge of forever?
If You or a Loved One Had a Near-Death Experience
What, then, should you do if you or someone you love reports the experience of an NDE? If you had such an experience, it is important to acknowledge that these events do occur. As the previous section explored, there is no agreement on why NDEs happen or what they mean. So, the key question still remains: what did the experience mean to you? You may very well be confused by that yourself.
If the experience was a positive one, you may find that your emotions are confused. You may have some ambivalent feelings or mixed emotions. You may be pleased to be back—on the road to recovery. Yet, you may still feel a twinge of resentment of not being able to enter the peace of the place you glimpsed—angered for perceiving such a place and then being sent home. You may experience spiritual confusion. Perhaps you never believed there was an afterlife, or maybe the images you experienced were quite different from what you believed or were taught. Here it may help to speak with an empathic clergy from your own faith tradition who can journey with you as you seek to make sense of the event.
Jonathon was a fifty-two-year-old man when he had such an experience after a heart attack. Jonathon described himself as a “non-practicing Jew—more Jewish by culture than faith.” When I asked him if he believed in a God, he replied, “I guess so, but I never really think much about it.” He reports that his life has considerably changed—in a very positive way. He reports that he is more conscious of his family now. Moreover, Jonathon describes himself as more spiritual. He has begun to deeply study his faith and traditions, often attends synagogue, and admits to a particular interest in the Kabbalah—a mystical tradition within Judaism. He also enjoys continued conversations with the Jewish chaplain who visited him in the hospital—appreciating the rabbi’s wisdom, understanding, openness, and knowledge of NDEs.
If the NDE was a negative one—the visions terrifying or troubling rather than comforting—you may be frightened and confused—perhaps wondering what you have done to merit such a horrifying experience.
Ron was also in his fifties when he had an NDE after cardiac arrest brought on by cocaine use. In his case, the NDE was both unusual and frightening. He saw himself in a field with a dark black cloud approaching. He heard a voice saying, “Return to darkness!” He remembers struggling to breathe before he finally opened his eyes in an ambulance. Ron is currently struggling to make sense of the experience as he continues to fight to overcome his substance abuse.
Whatever the content of the experience, it may be helpful to explore the meaning of that experience. It might be worthwhile to focus on how this experience may influence the ways that you live your life after such an encounter. You may find it helpful to explore these issues with a counselor and to read further about NDEs.
You may also wonder, perhaps even resent, why you did not have an NDE during a life-threatening encounter. In such a case, remember that even in such life-threatening struggles, most people do not have NDEs. Yet the same questions remain pertinent. What did this experience mean to you? As a result of this experience, will your attitudes, beliefs, values, or behaviors change in any ways?
If someone you know or love has had such an experience, be open to listen respectfully to that experience without either judging it or trying to explain it. Let the individual tell you what the experience meant to that person. Validate the experience. By that, I mean to value and acknowledge the personal meaning of the event to the individual who shared it with you. Affirm the trust that the individual has shown in choosing to share that experience with you. Understand that the individual may struggle as he or she seeks to both understand the experience and integrate that event within his or her life. Be there to listen and to support.
Recognize, too, that children may experience special struggles. Children may need special assistance in understanding their experience. Dr. Robert Coles, an emeritus professor at Harvard University reminds us that children are “spiritual pilgrims”—they are pioneers seeking to understand their world.82 By that, Coles means that they are trying to make sense of the world spiritually, but they have not yet developed the cognitive maps of their spiritual world. Hence children may need more assistance in understanding how these experiences integrate with their own developing spiritual beliefs. Children also may need safe places to explore these experiences. We can easily forget the cruel teasing that can be part of the child’s or adolescent’s world. In addition, sometimes parents and other adults may want to focus the child on the future—seeking to protect the child (and perhaps themselves) from a close encounter with death. It is unsurprising that many children who have NDEs report feelings of separation and abandonment.83
Recommendations for Professionals
If you are a professional in health or mental health, an educator or clergy, you likely have had some experiences with individuals who have had an NDE. Maggie Callanan, a nurse and the co-author of Final Gifts, offers sage advice to professionals who encounter NDEs among their clients and patients.84 She reminds us that it is always best as professionals to examine our own attitudes toward such experiences so as to be careful of counter-transference—that is, that our own attitudes or experiences do not color our responses to the individual’s account and reaction to that experience.
Professionals, too, should be alert to signs the individual may have had such experiences—listening for comments such as reports of “strange and vivid experiences” or “weird dreams.” Since persons may feel cautious about sharing such experiences, I would add that it might be helpful to explicitly solicit such experiences by say something like: Often, patients have told me about unusual experiences they had, do you experience anything unusual?
Callanan recommends further that professionals review the person’s reactions. It may be important to validate the experience without minimizing it. It is one thing to say something like: Others have shared similar experiences with me. Or, I have read about such experiences. It is a far different comment than Lots of people have these. And allow the individual to determine the meaning of that experience. Recognize, too, that some people may feel a sense of rejection by being sent back to their everyday lives after encountering an NDE.85
I would add that professionals need to be aware that not all experiences are positive. Persons with negative NDEs may need help both in interpreting the experience as well as hope that the future may not necessarily be so bleak. Much like Scrooge’s encounter with the ghost of the future, this may be the future but does not have to be the future if the individual, like Scrooge, is open to change.
Finally, Callanan recommends that, if the individual wishes, you can provide information or material to the person or, with permission, to the family. And, if they want, you can refer the person to counselors who can help that individual continue to process the experience.86 After all, one might need to explore when one experiences forever’s edge.
49. Anabiosis is defined as a state of suspended animation; a restoring to life from a deathlike condition.
50. Janice Miner Holden, Bruce Greyson, and Debbie James, “The Field of Near-Death Studies: Past, Present, and Future,” in The Handbook of Near-Death Studies: Thirty Years of Investigation, ed. Janice Miner Holden, Bruce Greyson, and Debbie James (Santa Barbara, CA: Praeger, 2009), 1–16.
51. Farnaz Masumian, “World Religions and Near-Death Experiences,” in The Handbook of Near-Death Studies: Thirty Years of Investigation, ed. Janice Miner Holden, Bruce Greyson, and Debbie James (Santa Barbara, CA: Praeger, 2009), 159–183.
52. Raymond Moody, Life After Life (New York: Bantam Books, 1975), n.p.
53. Moody, Life After Life, 55–58.
54. David Royse, “Angelic Encounters as Reported by Burn Victims,” Omega—Journal of Death and Dying (August 2019): n.p., https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0030222819870409.
55. The Agnostics' Adoption Society was founded to assist nonreligious people in adoption, as Ayer and others felt that most adoption agencies had a religious affiliation.
56. A. J. Ayer, “That Undiscovered Country,” New Humanist 104, no. 1 (May 1989): 10–13.
57. Kenneth Ring, Life at Death: A Scientific Investigation of the Near-Death Experience (New York: Coward, McCann, and Geohegan, 1980), 124.
58. Gregory Shushan, Near-Death Experiences in Indigenous Religions (New York: Oxford University Press, 2018), n.p.; Allan Kellehear, Experiences Near Death: Beyond Medicine and Religion (New York: Oxford University Press, 1990), n.p.
59. Shushan, Near-Death Experiences, n.p.
60. Shushan, Near-Death Experiences, n.p.
61. Shushan, Near-Death Experiences, n.p.
62. Kellehear, Experiences Near Death, n.p.
63. Shushan, Near-Death Experiences, n.p.
64. Carol Zaleski, Otherworld Journeys: Accounts of Near-Death Experience in Medieval and Modern Times (New York: Oxford University Press, 1988), 29.
65. Zaleski, Otherworld Journeys, n.p.
66. Betty, “Are They Hallucinations or Are They Real?” 37–49
67. Robert Kastenbaum, ed., Between Life and Death (New York: Springer, 1979), 20–24.
68. Kastenbaum, Between Life and Death, 20–24.
69. George Gallup and William Proctor, Adventures in Immortality: A Look Beyond the Threshold of Death (New York: McGraw-Hill, 1982), n.p.; Mahendra Perera, Gayan Padmasekara, John Belanti, “Prevalence of Near-Death Experiences in Australia,” Journal of Near-Death Studies 24, no. 2 (Winter 2005): 109, https://digital.library.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metadc799274/m2/1/high_res_d/vol24-no2-109.pdf.
70. David Lester, Is There Life after Death? An Examination of the Empirical Evidence (Jefferson, NC: McFarland & Co., 2005) has a good summary of this research.
71. Ring, Life at Death, 157–186.
72. Sam Parnia, Erasing Death: The Science that Is Rewriting the Boundaries Between Life and Death, with Josh Young (New York: Harper One, 2013), n.p.
73. Ring, Life at Death, 213–215.
74. Extensive discussions of some of the factors that might trigger an NDE are found in Ring, Life at Death, n.p.; Kastenbaum, Is There Life After Death?, n.p.; Bruce Greyson, Emily Williams Kelly, and Edward F. Kelly, “Explanatory Models for Near-Death Experiences,” in The Handbook of Near-Death Studies: Thirty Years of Investigation, ed. Janice Miner Holden, Bruce Greyson, and Debbie James (Santa Barbara, CA: Praeger, 2009), 212–234; Tillman Rodabough and Kyle Cole, “Near-Death Experiences as Secular Eschatology,” in Handbook of Death and Dying, ed. Clifton D. Bryant (Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage, 2003), 137–147.
75. Ring, Life at Death, 207–208.
76. Bruce Greyson, “Disassociation in People Who Have Near-Death Experiences: Out of Their Bodies or Out of Their Minds?” Lancet 355, no. 9202 (February 2000): 460–463, https://doi.org/ https://doi.org/10.1016/s0140-6736(00)82013-9.
77. Kellehear, Experiences Near Death, 182.
78. Greyson, Williams, and Kelly, “Explanatory Models for Near-Death Experiences,” 212–234.
79. Masumian, “World Religions and Near-Death Experiences,” 159–183.
80. Betty, “Are They Hallucinations or Are They Real?” 37–50.
81. Pirn van Lommel, Ruud van Wees, Vincent Meyers, and Ingrid Elfferich, “Near-Death Experience in Survivors of Cardiac Arrest: A Prospective Study in the Netherlands,” Lancet 358, no. 9298 (December 2001): n.p., https://doi.org/10.1016/s0140-6736(01)07100-8.
82. Robert Coles, The Spiritual Life of Children (Boston: Houghton Mifflin, 1990), 303–335.
83. Ryan, D. Foster, Debbie James, and Janice Miner Holden, “Practical Applications of Research on Near-Death Experience,” in The Handbook of Near-Death Studies: Thirty Years of Investigation, ed. Janice Miner Holden, Bruce Greyson, and Debbie James (Santa Barbara, CA: Praeger, 2009), 235–258.
84. Margaret Callanan, “Dealing with Death: Back from ‘Beyond,’” The American Journal of Nursing 94, no. 3 (March 1994): 20, 22–23, https://www.jstor.org/stable/3464541.
85. Callanan, “Dealing with Death,” 20, 22–23.
86. Callanan, “Dealing with Death,” 20, 22–23.