Take Control of Your Subtle Field
The consciousness (vijnana) and energy (prana) that compose your subtle field both have universal qualities, which means that they are life-affirming and they support family relationships. Examples of life-affirming qualities include respect for women and children as well as discipline, courage, patience, perseverance, loyalty, long-suffering, and non-harming. It’s qualities such as these that allow a family member to express themself as they truly are, without the burden of attachments and negative patterns getting in the way. And it’s qualities such as these that indicate that a family member has the space within their subtle field to empathize with the people they love.
If consciousness and energy with universal qualities were all that existed and the authentic mind was the only vehicle of awareness in the physical and non-physical universe, then all human relationships would be joyful and satisfying. But relationship problems with family members plague most people’s lives—which means that alongside energy and consciousness with universal qualities there must be (another form of) energy and consciousness that support patterns, attachments, and even obsessions—all of which can disrupt well-being and intimate, long-term relationships.
Energy and Consciousness with Individual Qualities
Other forms of subtle energy and consciousness do exist. They have individual qualities and they can change form, texture, and level of activity without warning. We’ve worked with them on countless occasions because, in almost all cases, they support the divisive relationship issues that pull family members apart.
Energy with individual qualities is easy to recognize because it feels dense and heavy. And it creates pressure and muscle-ache as well as anxiety, depression, self-doubt, and confusion when it interacts with your subtle field. Unlike prana (chi), it moves in waves that have what you can think of as character—or what we call a “flavor.” In most cases, the flavor is unpleasant because energy with individual qualities, when present in your subtle field, will block the flow of prana radiating through it. And it’s prana which serves as the foundation of all universal qualities including pleasure, love, intimacy, and joy.
Consciousness with individual qualities can burst or slowly blanket your awareness with attitudes and ideas that create confusion. It can also create self-doubt and obsessive thoughts that can compel you to act in hurtful ways or to hold on to beliefs that have their foundation in self-limiting fields of consciousness.
If enough fields of energy and consciousness with individual qualities become trapped in your subtle field and you become attached to them because you believe they are “real” (generated by your authentic mind), you can create an inauthentic mind which will function in opposition to your authentic mind. This mind has two parts, the “I,” which creates a false identity, and the ego, which manifests a false personality. Together they can disrupt your ability to be yourself, express yourself freely, and engage in life-affirming family relationships.
Although the individual mind and ego are self-serving and often narcissistic, they can be restrained so that they serve rather than interfere with your relationships. This is a goal of both Yoga and Taoism as well as deep family healing.
The ability to restrain the individual mind and ego is not something reserved for Yogic adepts or enlightened prophets. It’s something anyone with the yearning to be free and to be themselves can do.
Our continuing work with Andrew and his family illustrates how the individual mind and ego can interfere with your family relationships and how, with knowledge and skill, they can be made to serve you so that the process of deep family healing can proceed without disruption.
You were introduced to Andrew in the introduction to this book. In his first session with us, we learned that his father, Frank, had been a violent man whose words and actions had created a climate of fear in the family. Frank eventually abandoned Andrew and his mother when Andrew was six years old. To compensate for his feelings of pain and loss—as well as the pervasive anxiety he experienced—Andrew attached himself to subtle fields of energy and consciousness with individual qualities, which his father had projected into his subtle field. These fields, although not part of his authentic mind or subtle field, provided him with two things he desperately needed at the time—the feeling and belief that he was in control of his life. Unfortunately, these same projections compelled him to put his own needs first in virtually every interaction with other people, including his children—just like his father had done.
Although Andrew wanted nothing to do with his father, it was clear to us that he was still deeply attached to him. That’s because Andrew’s attachment to his father’s projections bound him to his father on the subtle levels of energy and consciousness. In addition, the core values he embraced compelled him to put personal survival above the needs of his wife and children.
We recognized early in our work with Andrew that the process required to heal the family dynamic would span three generations. This meant that to understand and participate fully in the process, Andrew needed to know how fields of consciousness and energy with individual qualities projected by his parents disrupted his development and his relationship to his wives and children.
Development of the Individual Mind and Ego
After Andrew had succeeded in creating his personal healing space, we explained that there are distinct stages in the development of the individual mind and ego, which coincide with a human being’s physical growth and sexual development. Of course, it’s not preordained that a child must go through all these stages. But because of the acculturation process, family attachments, and the legacy of past life karma, most children do.
In the first stage, which begins at birth and lasts about seven years, a child normally remains centered in their authentic mind, and the individual mind and ego rarely have the power to disrupt their experience of intimacy. This was not the case with Andrew’s son, who suffered a birth trauma during delivery. He was a large baby and got stuck in the birth canal. As a result, the delivery had to be completed using suction.
As a child grows older, however, there will be a shift of attention towards the external world that coincides with greater identification with the individual mind and ego. It’s during the second stage, between the ages of seven and twelve, that many children become aware of the legacy of past action and the limitations imposed on them and their free range of activities by karmic baggage.
Karmic baggage is the accumulated amount of energy and consciousness with individual qualities that a person carries in their subtle field from one lifetime to another. As attachment grows during the third and fourth stage of personality development, between the ages of thirteen and early adulthood, the growing child will begin to experience a more fixed personality and rigid orientation towards themselves and the external world. It’s during these stages, at least for some children, that the individual mind and ego eclipse the functions of the authentic mind and become dominant.
Attachment to the individual mind and ego brings with it an end to unlimited access to the authentic mind, which was a hallmark of childhood. This loss has far-reaching consequences since access to the authentic mind and the pleasure, love, intimacy, and joy that emerge from it will determine whether an adult will be able to successfully engage in long-term, intimate relationships.3
One thing that hadn’t been diminished by Andrew’s difficult childhood was his curiosity. And during our explanation, Andrew peppered us with questions about the condition of his father’s subtle field and how it had influenced him. We explained that his father’s subtle field had been disrupted in the first stage of development (when he was about two years old), which meant he had been unable to establish an authentic identity or even feel himself clearly. His inability to feel himself indicated that he had insufficient space in his subtle field for authentic feelings and emotions to emerge and to be resolved. It also meant that he hadn’t been able to develop the patience, understanding, or the empathy he needed for successful parenting.
The Anatomy of Your Subtle Field
We continued by explaining that to overcome the legacy of his past life karma and the attachments he’d inadvertently created by embracing his father’s projections, Andrew needed to know that the subtle field contains two types of energetic vehicles. Both vehicles play an important role in energetic interactions between people in relationship.
There are energy bodies that are the same size and shape as the physical-material body. Energy bodies help a person remain stable and centered in their authentic mind. People also have sheaths that are slightly larger than energy bodies. They help people express themselves freely. And they facilitate interpersonal interactions on the physical and non-physical levels.
In addition to energetic vehicles, the subtle field contains resource fields. Resource fields provide the energy that nourish energy bodies and sheaths as well as chakras and chakra fields, meridians, auras, and minor energy centers scattered throughout the subtle field. They also nourish dantians and the neighboring cavities described by the Taoists.
Everyone has thirteen chakras in their body space. These include the seven traditional chakras, which emerge along the spine and in the head, two etheric chakras, two physical chakras, and two physical-material chakras (see Figure 3: The Chakras in Body Space).
The activities performed by the chakras, particularly the thirteen chakras in body space, are especially important to the health of family relationships. They include many interactions that people mistakenly believe take place exclusively on the physical-material plane. The sense of belonging and trust, as well as the ability to express feelings and emotions freely, are examples of energetic interactions regulated by the chakras; so is the ability to share pleasure, love, and intimacy with other people. The chakras’ role in these interactions points to the fact that they play a central role in maintaining the health of family relationships.
Figure 3: The Chakras in Body Space
The Chakras
The word chakra comes from Sanskrit, the sacred language of India, and means wheel. There are two distinct parts of a chakra—the chakra gate and the chakra field. For people with the ability to see non-physical energy fields, a chakra gate will look like a brightly colored disk that spins rapidly at the end of what looks like a long axle or stalk (see Figure 4: The Chakra Gate). The wheel portion of the chakra gate is about three inches (ten centimeters) in diameter and perpetually moves or spins around a central axis. Emerging from the center of the disk are what appear to be spokes.
Although chakra gates usually get the most attention from practitioners, the principal part of a chakra is the vast reservoir of prana and jing connected to the chakra gate, which we call the chakra field. Jing is the essence of prana (chi). You will learn how jing influences your relationships and how it can be used to heal family relationships later in this book.
In most cases, your chakra field will extend a significant distance from the surface of your physical-material body. That’s because a healthy chakra field will contain a greater amount of prana and jing than a chakra field that is unhealthy. A healthy chakra field will also allow more prana and jing from the chakra field to be distributed by the chakra gate to your subtle field and physical-material body. This means that the most satisfying parts of family life—like the fullness of joy you experience watching your children play—and the amount of energy you can share with your loved ones depends primarily on the health of your chakra fields.
Chakra gates and their fields are able to perform several important functions besides providing your subtle field and physical-material body with prana and jing. They link all human beings to Universal Consciousness, the singularity from which everything in the physical and non-physical universe emerged. And they balance the forces of polarity and gender within you by permitting prana and jing to move through your subtle field in four general directions, up the back, down the front, forward from the back to the front, and backward from the front to the back.
Maintaining a healthy balance between the forces of polarity and gender will do three additional things that support family relationships. They will enhance the amount of space you have within you; they will enhance your flexibility; and they will enhance your ability to have fun, which should not be underestimated when evaluating your quality of life.
The Thirteen Chakras in Body Space
There are 146 chakras within your non-physical field. Sixty-three emerge above the top of your head and seventy emerge below your perineum. The thirteen most important chakras emerge within your body space. The thirteen chakras within body space include the seven traditional chakras that emerge along the spine and in the head, two etheric chakras, two physical chakras, and two physical-material chakras. In the following text, you will find a short list of activities regulated by these thirteen chakras.
The First Chakra emerges from the base of your spine. It regulates authentic power, security, self-confidence, body image, and your connection to the earth and its creatures. If the chakra is functioning healthfully, you will feel secure in your body and have a positive body image. You will also have a healthy relationship to the earth and its creatures.
The Second Chakra emerges four finger widths below your navel. It regulates vitality, gender identity (masculinity or femininity), creativity, and sexual love. When the chakra is functioning healthfully, your gender identity will be in balance, which means you will be able to give and receive universal masculine and feminine energy freely. And you will have access to all your creativity and personal power.
The Third Chakra emerges from your solar plexus. It regulates the energy associated with satisfaction, contentment, trust, belonging, intimacy, friendship, status, and psychic well-being. If the chakra is functioning healthfully, you will experience all the benefits that derive from your friendships, family relationships, and group affiliations.
The Fourth Chakra emerges from the center of your breastbone. It regulates self-awareness and personal rights including the right to control your physical-material body, to express your emotions, and to follow your personal dharma (life path). When the chakra is functioning healthfully, you will be self-confident and able to share your emotions and ideas spontaneously with other people.
The Fifth Chakra emerges from your neck. It regulates self-expression, unconditional joy, perseverance, and personal integrity. When the chakra is functioning healthfully, you will be able to express yourself freely, and your dominant feeling will be joy.
The Sixth Chakra emerges from your brow. It’s sometimes called the third eye. It regulates personal will, awareness, memory, intuition, reasoning, and rational, deductive thought. When the chakra is functioning healthfully, you will have unrestricted awareness of both your physical-material and non-physical environments.
The Seventh Chakra emerges from your head. It provides you with access to transcendental consciousness, self-knowledge, and transcendent relationship. When it’s functioning healthfully, you will recognize your dharma (life purpose) and have unrestricted access to Universal Consciousness.
The Etheric Chakras emerge from either side of your lower abdomen. They regulate authentic feelings. There are hundreds of authentic feelings that they regulate, including comfort, satisfaction, fatigue, and enthusiasm. If the chakras are functioning healthfully, you will be able to share your feelings freely—and you will enjoy an unrestricted flow of prana and jing on the etheric level.
The Physical Chakras: your upper physical chakra emerges from a position just below and behind your sixth chakra. Your lower physical chakra emerges from a position just below and in front of your second chakra. The physical chakras are responsible for regulating physical sensation and pleasure, particularly sexual pleasure.
The Physical-Material Chakras: your upper physical-material chakra emerges from a position just below your chin. Your lower physical-material chakra emerges from a position a palm’s width below your perineum. The physical-
material chakras are responsible for grounding you in the physical-material world. Being grounded allows you to experience your physical-material body and its environment without disruption. It also enhances your experience of union with the earth and its creatures. For the position of the thirteen chakras in body space, see Figure 3: The Chakras in Body Space.
Exercise: Feeling the Chakras
in Body Space
To facilitate Andrew’s healing process—and to make him more aware of his relationship to subtle energy—we had him perform the next series of exercises. That’s because even though many people have learned something about the structure and function of the chakras, they often have difficulty sensing them. This is unfortunate because prana radiating through the chakras can be used to heal many of the conditions and ailments that interfere with family relationships.
A simple way to sense the chakras is to use the power of running water to stimulate them. This is easy to do in the shower. Simply direct the stream of water from the shower head to the front of your first chakra gate, which extends from the base of your spine to a point three inches (ten centimeters) below it. Continue until you feel a vibration emerging from the point where the chakra gate is located. Take a few moments to enjoy the resonance—then move the shower head to the second chakra gate, four finger widths below your navel. After a few moments, you will feel the unique vibration of the second chakra. Continue to use the water emerging from the shower head to stimulate your third through seventh chakras, and your etheric, physical, and physical-material chakras.4 You can see the position of the chakras by consulting Figure 3: The Chakras in Body Space.
Once you’re finished stimulating your chakras, take about ten minutes to enjoy their enhanced resonance, which will continue—even after you’ve finished stimulating them.
Exercise: Sensing the Chakras
in Body Space
Another way to sense the chakras in your body space is to rub your palms together and then place the palm of your “positive” hand—right if you’re right-handed, left if you’re left-handed—about three inches (ten centimeters) in front of each chakra gate.
Rubbing your palms together polarizes them slightly, making it easier for you to sense the resonance of each chakra consciously. If you begin by rubbing your hands together and then place your positive hand above your first chakra gate, you will activate the chakra and your palm will register its unique resonance by vibrating or glowing within the chakra’s spectrum of energy.
To continue the process, simply remove your hand and rub your palms together again. Then place the palm of your positive hand in front of the second chakra gate, four finger widths below your navel. Your palm will register a slightly higher resonance than your first chakra. Continue in the same way by rubbing your palms together and then experiencing the unique resonance of the third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh chakras.
Once you’ve experienced the resonance of the seven traditional chakras, use the same technique to sense the resonance of your etheric, physical, and physical-material chakras.
After you’ve finished stimulating all thirteen chakras, take a few minutes to enjoy the effects that you experience on the levels of body, soul, and spirit.
Once you can sense the resonance of your chakras in body space, you can use your intent and mental attention to activate them. In the exercise that follows, you will activate your heart chakra. The same technique can be used to activate any of your 146 chakras. Being able to activate your chakras is an essential part of many of the advanced healing techniques you will perform in deep family healing. So we recommend that you perform the exercise as part of your daily regimen of energy work.
To begin the exercise, find a comfortable position with your back straight. Then close your eyes and breathe deeply through your nose for two to three minutes. When you’re ready to continue, go to your personal healing space and bring your awareness to your body, soul, and spirit. Enjoy your healing space for five minutes. Then assert in a normal voice, “It’s my intent to activate my heart chakra.” Once you’ve activated your heart chakra, you’ll feel a growing feeling of lightness, which is accompanied by a heightened sense of well-being. You can enhance these effects by asserting, “It’s my intent to turn my appropriate organs of perception inward on the level of my heart chakra.”
By turning the appropriate organs of perception (sight, hearing, and feeling) inward, you’ll become even more conscious of the shift that has taken place once you’ve activated your heart chakra.
Enjoy the meditation for fifteen minutes. During that time, resist the urge to drift or to follow the movement of energetic waves and/or fields. Only fields of energy with individual qualities move in waves and/or fields. And if you allow yourself to be distracted by the movement of energy with individual qualities, your chakra will become less active. After fifteen minutes, return to normal consciousness by counting from one to five. When you reach the number five, open your eyes and bring yourself out of the meditation.
Once Andrew learned to activate his chakras in body space, we taught him to enhance his discernment by taking a more comprehensive journey through his subtle field. We recommend that you take the same journey in order to familiarize yourself with the thirteen chakras in body space—and to develop your discernment.
Discernment is a form of subtle intuition that will enable you to recognize the differences between energy with universal qualities, which is the foundation of pleasure, joy, and generosity, and energy with individual qualities, which is the foundation of self-limiting qualities such as jealousy, dependency, and arrogance. By developing your discernment, you will find it easier to remain centered in energetic fields that are authentic. And in a short time, you will be able to wrest control of your subtle field back, on the energy level, from fields of energy with individual qualities.
Andrew performed the journey of discernment for several weeks because of his inability to discern the difference between fields of energy with universal qualities and fields of energy with individual qualities. The exercise turned out to be a boon for him and will be a boon for anyone who has difficulty sensing their subtle energy field and the subtle energetic interactions that take place within it.
In your journey, you will observe your chakras in body space and the fields of distorted energy that have been interfering with their ability to function healthfully. These fields will be easy to discern because they feel heavy and move in waves. And they have individual qualities such as size, shape, density, level of activity, and color. These individual qualities will stand out against the background of prana which has only universal qualities and which is light and clear and doesn’t move in waves.
Exercise: A Journey of Discernment
To begin your journey of discernment, find a comfortable position with your back straight. Then close your eyes and breathe deeply through your nose for two to three minutes. Go to your personal healing space next and bring your awareness to your body, soul, and spirit. When you’re ready to continue, assert, “It’s my intent to visualize a white screen eight feet (two and a half meters) in front of me.” Once the visual screen has materialized, assert, “It’s my intent to visualize an image of myself on the screen.” Keep your appropriate organs of perception (sight, hearing, feeling, intuition, etc.) open and active because it’s by turning the appropriate organs of perception inward, on the subtle planes, that you will perceive the organs of your subtle field.
After you’ve examined your image from eight feet (two and a half meters) away, assert, “It’s my intent to visualize the organs of my subtle field described by Yogic adepts.” Immediately, the physical image will give way to an image that appears almost transparent. As soon as you view the transparent image, assert, “It’s my intent to project myself inside my subtle field alongside my first chakra.” Use all the appropriate senses to examine your first chakra gate and then the chakra field. Reach out and touch them both. Feel the pressure and texture of the surface boundary that surrounds the chakra field. Pay attention to everything you see and feel. Even your emotional state and your body awareness can provide you with valuable information. If you suddenly feel weak or stressed or you feel pressure and/or mild pain for no apparent reason, it could mean that the first chakra gate or field contains distorted energy.
After you’ve observed your first chakra for one to two minutes, assert, “It’s my intent to project myself alongside my second chakra and to observe its features.” Take one to two minutes to observe the condition of your second chakra. Then assert, “It’s my intent to project myself alongside my third chakra.” Continue in the same way until you’ve observed the seven traditional chakras along your spine and head as well as your etheric, physical, and physical-material chakras. Then assert, “It’s my intent to experience fields of distorted energy that interfere with the functions of my seven traditional chakras in body space.” Don’t interact with these distorted fields; just observe them. They will stand out from the background of prana (chi), which is clear, doesn’t move, and has no individual qualities.
When you’re satisfied with what you’ve learned, assert, “It’s my intent to return to my original position eight feet in front of my visual screen.” Release the image of yourself and the visual screen next. Then assert, “It’s my intent to leave my healing space.” After you’ve brought yourself out of your healing space, count from one to five. When you reach the number five, open your eyes—and bring yourself out of the exercise.
Andrew continued to perform the exercise regularly until he was confident that he could discern the differences between prana (chi) and energy with individual qualities. In a subsequent session, he confessed that the last thing he ever wanted was to become like his father. We understood his concern which was why we continued his healing process by helping him to restore his relationship to his parents.
At the time, Andrew still believed that his relationship issues were caused almost exclusively by his father’s actions. We recognized that this was only part of the problem and that his mother, Patricia, also had an impact on his subtle field. This came as no surprise since both parents, regardless of their condition, influence the family dynamic. In Andrew’s birth family, Patricia and her energetic projections contributed to the difficulty he had establishing an independent identity and healthy relationships with his wives and children.
During a subsequent session, we explained that even though his father had projected distorted energy at Andrew—in the form of cords and controlling waves—in an effort to push him away, his projections had the opposite effect. They had bound them together. That’s because projections designed to push people away can cause attachments that bind people together for years or, in some cases, lifetimes.
In contrast, Patricia had projected at him in order to enhance his security and make him feel safe in what she felt was a conflict-ridden home environment. Although these projections were less intense, they were laced with worry, anxiety, and need, which had their foundation in fields of energy with individual qualities. As a result, they contributed to the problem he had developing healthy relationships to other people.
In the process of healing his family dynamic, we taught Andrew to release his attachments to both his mother and father, which he did over a period of several months.
We also recommended that he include Patricia in the healing process. There was some resistance at first on her part. But after Andrew assured her that he wanted to restore their relationship, she agreed. We met her two weeks after Andrew told her about deep family healing. During our first session with her, we explained that she and Andrew could restore their relationship by sharing life-affirming energy with one another. Once she agreed to continue, we taught Andrew and Patricia to share prana with one another from their seven traditional chakras in body space.
Like Andrew and Patricia, you can use the following exercise to enhance your relationship to a family member. It doesn’t matter if the family member has initiated the rift or if they have harmed you in thought or deed. By sharing prana with them, you will enhance your ability to communicate with them in a positive and joyful way.
You can perform the following exercise when you are physically next to a family member or by video-conferencing with them. To enhance the life-affirming energy that you can share with a family member when you are physically together, sit six feet apart facing them. To do the same via video conferencing, sit in front of your computer so that your body from your thighs to your head is visible in the screen. Then, along with your exercise partner, follow the following instructions. Breathe deeply through your nose for two to three minutes. Then assert, “It’s my intent to go to my personal healing space.” Once you’ve experienced your personal healing space, bring your awareness to your body, soul, and spirit. Enjoy the process for five minutes. Then assert, “It’s my intent to bring my mental attention to my first chakra at the base of my spine.” Take a minute or two to enjoy the glow as your chakra becomes active. Then assert along with your exercise partner, “It’s my intent to radiate prana to … (name of your exercise partner) from my first chakra.” Take two to three minutes to enjoy the process. Then continue in the same way with your second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh chakras. After you’ve shared prana with your exercise partner from each of your seven traditional chakras, enjoy the effects for another five minutes. Then you and your exercise partner should bring yourselves out of the exercise by counting from one to five. When you reach the number five, you can both open your eyes and give each other feedback or even a hug if it feels appropriate. By repeating this exercise, you can enhance your relationship by continuing to share prana with one another.
Once Andrew had released his attachments to his father and begun to share prana with his mother, we suggested that he contact his children, which he did several weeks later. Like Patricia, his children were at first reluctant to engage in the process of deep family healing. But after they spoke with us, they finally agreed to meet Andrew and give it a try.
To heal his relationship to his children, Andrew had to overcome issues that had their foundation in incompatibility and the intrusion of distorted fields into his and his children’s fields of subtle energy and consciousness. In the following chapters, you will learn how the issues of compatibility—which is determined by soul vibration, core values, and the elements—and the intrusion of distorted fields influence your relationships. Then, like Andrew and his children, you will learn how you can enhance compatibility and restore family relationships.