Contents

Foreword vii

Introduction 1

Part 1: Getting Started

1. “Why Is It so Hard?”: How ACT Can Help 5

2. “My House Is a Stress Machine”: Your Struggle as a Parent 11

Part 2: Being Real

3. “She’s so Manipulative”: Judgment Thoughts 23

4. “He Just Shouldn’t”: When Rules Become Rigid 35

5. “My Time-Traveling Machine”: Worries and Ruminations 45

6. “I Suck as a Parent”: Mind Stories 53

7. “It’s an Emotional Rollercoaster”: Handling Those Intense Emotions 63

8. “What Type of Parent Do I Want to Be?”: Your Parenting Values 71

Part 3: Making a Shift

9. “I’m Here, Fully Present”: Mindfulness Skills 85

10. “I See You”: Appreciation Skills 99

11. “I Get It, It’s Hard”: Empathy Skills 107

12. “Let’s Talk”: Assertiveness Skills 119

13. “Stop Nagging, Start Rewarding”: Behavioral-Management Skills 129

14. “Let’s Deal with This”: Conflict Resolution Skills 139

15. “Taming the Demon”: Anger Skills 149

16. “I Don’t Know How to Let It Go”: Forgiveness Skills 165

17. “Why Do I Need to Be Kind?”: Compassion Skills 175

Part 4: When Things Get Rocky

18. “Let’s Drop the Feminine Crap!”: For Fathers and Male Caregivers 191

19. “Am I Willing?”: Moments of Choice 199

Afterword 211

Appendix 213

Acknowledgments 221

References 223