Always think big. Especially in the face of those who tell you to scale it back, tone it down, think just a tiny bit smaller. Yes, especially then. When you get into business, whether at age 10 or at age 25, you will come across people who will try, sometimes in a well-intentioned way, to modify your dreams. They will tell you to aim lower so you’ll be more apt to hit your mark. They may warn you that what you’re trying to do is going to be really, really hard. Or even impossible. They’re not doing it to be mean. They’re thinking about you and your fragile little heart, worrying that you’ll shoot for the moon and then give up if you can’t get there. So don’t be too mad at them. Just listen and nod your head and say thank you. You should always be polite, especially when someone’s doling out free advice. But then walk away with a secret smile on your face because you know something they don’t: you’re a badass boss. And when you hear something negative, you hear challenge.

When you talk about your dreams of running a business, from concept to execution, you should always THINK BIG. To achieve something big you need to conceptualize it. You need to strive and plan and hope and plan some more. It takes work, but you’re up to the challenge. Just set your compass in the direction you intend to go. In the nitty-gritty world of making your business happen day-to-day, there will be opportunities to reconsider, reframe, and retool. But never stop aiming high or thinking big.

BEING BOSS

WHEN YOU’RE IN CHARGE, YOU RUN THE SHOW. Being “boss” means being the boss, acting as a benevolent captain of your own ship, which will sail wherever you point it. You are in charge of yourself and anyone else who works for you and with you to achieve your business goals.

Good bosses lead by example, which means you are the face of your business. Take a good, hard look at your number one employee—you—and make sure she’s doing a good job. Be the kind of boss you’d like to work for.

There’s also the less tangible concept of being “Boss.” It’s all about attitude. Women who are Boss don’t have to run businesses, though many of them do. Some are women you’ve heard of and others you’ll wish you had. Whether it was Nellie Bly, digging up newspaper stories in the nineteenth century, or Beyoncé, rocking out with cut-to-the-point lyrics today, there’s no shortage of Boss women who are leading the way. And there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be one of them. There is room for all of us.

BOSS IS A STATE OF MIND. A Boss is a take-charge chick with big ideas and limitless ambitions. Boss is the way you see yourself and the way you project yourself to the world. To be Boss is to be your own brand of hip, cool, and awesome, to define yourself the way you want to be—whether that’s quietly confident, loud and take-charge, or mad creative—it’s you. You’re it. You’re the business. Success or failure, no one can take your Boss-ness away from you.

THE STARTING POINT IS ATTITUDE. In order to be a Boss, you must have confidence in yourself. Not everything you do will be perfect, but as long as you believe in yourself, you know that you’ll keep trying until you get it right. That’s confidence. You will work without setting limits on what you think you can do. You’ll cast a wide net for dreams and figure out how to make them reality. You’ll work hard. You won’t whine. You’ll ask when you need help. You’ll take inspiration from the legions of women who came before you, the ones who define what it means to be So Boss.

WE ARE WOMEN, HEAR US ROAR

We use a lot of terms to refer to ourselves—girls, women, chicks, bosses—and we mean no disrespect to those who fought hard-won battles in the name of women’s rights. We know we could be calling ourselves “womyn” or ditching references to our gender altogether, and we aren’t promoting a return to backward thinking. We aren’t belittling ourselves by using the word girl. On the contrary, we’re taking the word back. Historically, some people have used “girl” as an insult or as a way of conveying a juvenile, less capable image, because they think women can’t do everything just as well as men can. But we know they’re wrong, and we know that being a girl is something to be proud of. As women, we’ve had to fight for our rights and for respect, and that fight just adds to our strength.

WE ALL EXPRESS DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF OUR SELF-IMAGES AT DIFFERENT TIMES. We are all girls, women, chicks, dames, broads, and goddesses. We all work hard, and we deserve to call ourselves whatever we want. A girl who runs a business is no less powerful than a woman who runs a business. We are all harnessing our inner Eleanor Roosevelts and working to create entrepreneurial projects. That’s what being So Boss means. And that’s what it means to be a girl, a woman, or whatever you want to call yourself.

SO LET’S NOT HAVE ANY CONFUSION ABOUT WHO WE MEAN WHEN WE’RE DESCRIBING BOSSES: WE’RE DESCRIBING OURSELVES. We’re describing girls who want to start businesses and those who are already running the show. We’re describing ladies with attitude who won’t take no for an answer—not where their dreams are concerned. We’re describing J.K. Rowling, Janelle Monae, Amelia Earheart, Mo’ne Davis, Gloria Steinem, Oprah Winfrey, Lucille Ball, Linda Sarsour, Chelsea Clinton, Taylor Swift, Malala Yousafzai, Sofia Vergara, Aung San Suu Kyi, Michelle Obama, Tavi Gevinson, Samantha Bee. And we’re describing you.

JUST ONE MORE THING

There will be a lot of “just one more things” in this book—many concepts require a little afterthought or footnote for clarity or nuance, so be sure to take note. Sometimes you might find the “just one more things” to be even more valuable than the things themselves.

IN THIS CASE, THE FOOTNOTE IS ABOUT BEING GOOD TO YOUR FELLOW BOSSES. Never cut another female down. We’re all here working hard to create something new, to motivate change in the world, to start something that matters. Some people may succeed seemingly easily, or it looks like they got a leg up. You may think someone’s idea is ridiculous and you can’t imagine how it succeeded. Or you may see someone succeeding who you know isn’t a very nice person.

HOLD YOUR TONGUE. We don’t get ahead by disparaging one another. The expression “a rising tide floats all boats” applies to us—especially since women need to work together and support one another in a world where we haven’t always been taken seriously. Where one woman succeeded there is room for another. One person’s rise paves the way for the next one to follow, and we don’t need to boost ourselves by stepping on others. Be nice to everyone. Be fair. Treat other people the way you’d like to be treated. You never know who you may come in contact with later. Root for one another.