Think Happy,
Be Happy
By following our hearts, having gratitude for all that we have, and taking time to truly enjoy every moment of every day, we can reduce stress and make a huge impact on our happiness and on our health. One of my favorite sayings, which has often been attributed to Voltaire, is “I have chosen to be happy because it is good for my health.” How true this is. Just feeling positive and looking at life from a glass-half-full perspective can do wonders for your stress levels and your happiness. A big part of this is making the choice to be happy and not let the bad things in life get you down. Viktor Frankl, in Man’s Search for Meaning, touches upon how a positive attitude allows a person to endure suffering and disappointments and can enhance satisfaction. A negative attitude, however, can worsen pain or disappointment and undermine satisfaction.
We all have the freedom to choose how we’ll respond to a situation and how we approach each situation in our lives (with either a positive or a negative attitude) and this helps to shape the meaning of our lives. Research backs this up. One study, published in a journal of the American Psychological Association, found that people who are cheerful and positive in the face of stress have lower levels of inflammation in the body. Failing to maintain a positive, happy outlook had the opposite effect: elevated levels of disease-triggering inflammation, particularly in women. What’s more, scientists at the University of Wisconsin–Madison found that being happy increases our antibodies—critical proteins utilized by the immune system to fight off viruses, bacteria, and more—by an incredible 50 percent. (Sin et al, 2015; Collingwood, 2014)
I would also say that people who are happier are more beautiful. They have a natural glow about them, as well as an indescribable energy that radiates from the inside out.
The Habits of Happy People
Being cheerful is contagious, for you and for everyone else around you. It’s hard not to smile when someone else smiles at you. It also brings a natural radiance and beauty to your face that can’t be mimicked by any skin creams or treatments. Happy people are beautiful people. They have what I call truly natural beauty.
There are four cardinal virtues, as outlined by Lao Tzu in the classic Chinese text Tao Te Ching that closely mimic the habits of happy people: reverence for all life, natural sincerity, gentleness, and supportiveness. According to Lao Tzu, it is through these principles that we align spiritually, and in turn receive universal guidance and support. In this way, we are able to cultivate true inner peace. I would also say it is through these principles that we can cultivate true happiness. (Power of Positivity, 2019) There is also a quote I love from Mahatma Gandhi that also speaks to this alignment as it relates to happiness: “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” How true this is. It’s not always easy to achieve this harmony, but this is where this book comes in. Consider it your personal stress-busting, happiness-boosting beauty book.
If you’re feeling less than cheerful lately, try practicing these cardinal virtues by following one or all of these habits of happy people.
1. Take time to nourish the relationships that matter.
One way to take positive steps toward happiness is through friends and family. Healthy relationships are good for us emotionally and physically. People with happy relationships have an overall positive view of life and are generally less stressed. They also have a stronger immune system, decreased health issues like heart disease, and increased longevity. In fact, researchers at Carnegie Mellon University found that just the act of hugging someone can boost your health. (Cohen et al, 2014) Sex can help reduce stress too, and even make you look younger. This is the result of the secretion, during sex, of the human growth hormone or HGH. It’s this hormone that plays a key role in boosting skin elasticity. (Carter, 2013)
Pets help make people happy too, because they provide meaningful social support. There’s incredible evidence, firsthand and in clinical research, that there’s an emotional bond between people and animals that can have benefits on our emotional and physical health. In fact, psychologists have found that pet owners have higher self-esteem, feel less lonely, are less fearful, and are more socially outgoing, all factors that can make one less stressed and more happy. (McConnell et al, 2011) These same pet owners had a greater sense of belonging, meaningful existence, and control over their lives. I have found this in my own life. My family’s two dogs bring us such joy, love, and laughter. They also remind us to be mindful and live in the moment. (McConnell, 2011)
2. Allow yourself small moments of happiness.
All it takes sometimes is a smile. Sometimes forcing yourself to smile when you least want to will change your outlook for the better. I’ve found that smiling makes me feel happy on the inside. A smile lights up your face and makes others happy to be around you. There’s also a natural beauty in those who smile a lot.
3. Limit your daily news intake, particularly before bed.
There are so many stress-provoking stories in the news today it’s no wonder people are so full of stress. While it’s important to stay informed, too much news can trigger more anxiety, and the constant influx of news via social media is only adding to this stress. Try avoiding media for a few days each month and always at least an hour before going to bed each night, and see how you feel. You may find yourself less stressed and sleeping more soundly.
When it comes to what’s going on in the world or even in just our own lives, I’ve found that these words from the theologian-philosopher Reinhold Niebuhr (repeated often or pasted up on a note by your desk or on your fridge) can often help: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” (Chronicle of Higher Education, 2014)
4. Schedule relaxation time, even if you
have to write it on your calendar.
The happiest people are those who take regular breaks from daily stress. Whether that means regular meditation, yoga, exercise, daily walks, or even just taking time for yourself to do something you enjoy, taking a break from the grind will make you feel more in control of your life and will contribute to you having a more positive outlook overall.
5. Carve out time to move every day.
Just as you have to schedule relaxation time, scheduling regular exercise can help make you feel happier. (And it may be that your exercise time is your relaxation time, so you get double the benefits.) Working out consistently has been shown in numerous studies to mimic the effects of antidepressants on the brain. When you exercise, the body releases endorphins, chemicals secreted by the hypothalamus that make you feel good. When these endorphins are released, they block the transmission of pain signals and also produce a euphoric feeling. (Scheve, 2019) Exercise has also been shown to improve sleep, enough of which can make anyone’s outlook on the world rosier. (Youngstedt, 2005)
6. Be grateful for the things in your life that are going well, even if they’re small and insignificant in your mind.
Waking up in the morning, a beautiful sunset, a happy tail wag and greeting from a pet, your morning cup of hot coffee, getting to work without a traffic jam. Big victories and events shouldn’t be the focus in life. It’s the small victories and pleasures around us every day that we also should be finding joy in. Opportunities for fun and meaningfulness are all around us. This is why I love this quote from Frederick Koenig: “We tend to forget that happiness doesn’t come as a result of getting something we don’t have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”
7. Consciously make an effort to change your outlook.
This Frederick Koenig quote also speaks to the benefit of looking at life from a positive perspective. As hard as it is sometimes to always look at life positively, doing so will make you happier. In fact, the study I mentioned earlier from a journal of the American Psychological Association found that being positive is linked to a healthier heart, too. (University of Illinois, 2015)
8. Don’t let social media make you
feel bad about your own life.
Bad days happen to everyone, even if it doesn’t seem that way. Social media today can sometimes make it look like everyone has a better life than you, but that’s only how it seems. So, as hard as it is to do, be careful not to judge your day and your life by how it compares to someone else’s.
9. Find time to volunteer or help someone else.
The sense of helping others and the world at large gives happy people what’s been called a “helper’s high” and seems to help protect them against feelings of anxiety and depression.
10. Discover your spiritual side.
Spirituality gives you a sense that there’s something greater in the world than just you. This is a humbling way to think and seems to help happy people shrug off the not-so-great things that happen in life. Cultivating spirituality has also been shown to be good for your health. It can help reduce depression and nurture hope. (Warber et al, 2011)
11. Make a list of your blessings.
Just making it a habit to be aware of the blessings you do have on a daily basis can bring a smile to your face. Create a list if you have to, every day, of five to ten things that bring you happiness. You might just find your outlook shifting for the better.
Complementary and Alternative
Therapies that Cultivate Peace
Therapies like meditation, visualization, and breathwork can all reduce anxiety and stress, improve one’s outlook on life, and be a beneficial addition to a healthy lifestyle. Each works to reduce anxiety and give you an overall sense of calm. These therapies below are all ones that I use in my own life and recommend to my patients. They can help boost immune functioning and improve overall health.
Acupressure and Acupuncture
Both developed over five thousand years ago as a part of traditional Chinese medicine (also referred to as TCM). They both involve precise finger placement and pressure (acupressure) or use of needles (acupuncture) on specific body points or meridians. In Asian medical philosophy, manipulation of these points with pressure or needles can improve blood flow, healing, and tension and unblock or increase vital qi (pronounced chee) energy, which can not only reduce stress but can also help heal the body. It’s believed that balancing the meridians allows healing energy to flow more freely in the body. (Vickers et al, 2012)
I’ve found that when patients have had acupuncture and acupressure, they’ve reported feeling better immediately afterward (they’re less anxious and they sleep better) but also in the weeks following their treatment. There’s a reason for this: acupressure and acupuncture are used to relieve pain and muscle tension and promote relaxation. Research published in the Journal of the American Geriatrics Society also showed that walking on river stone paths, which activates acupressure points on the soles of the feet, can help relieve pain, improve sleep, and improve overall physical and mental wellness in older adults. (ScienceDaily, 2005) What’s more, for thousands of years, acupuncture has been used to treat disorders of the skin like eczema and psoriasis. (Pacific College, 2015)
To relieve anxiety at night and sleep better, try this acupressure tip at home: apply gentle pressure for thirty seconds to what’s called the K1 point on the ball of your foot (about one-third of the way down the foot between the second and third toes, in the small indentation on the ball of the foot). Then release it for about five seconds, and press again for thirty seconds to one minute. Repeat on the other foot. (Ma et al, 2015)
Healing Touch
Healing touch, also called therapeutic touch, is a therapy that helps to restore and balance energy in the body. It was founded in 1989 by Janet Mentgen, a registered nurse. Practitioners use their hands and very light or near-the-body touch to promote relaxation and balance the energy that surrounds the body. The goal is to remove energetic blockages (similar to acupuncture or acupressure, which remove energy blockages to promote the flow of qi, to facilitate healing). There are various forms of this approach, including Reiki, energy field therapy, and therapeutic touch.
During healing touch, the practitioner focuses on areas where the energy field is determined to be stagnant or not flowing and/or on the seven main energy centers, called chakras in yoga philosophy. Chakra is a Sanskrit term for the energy centers that are believed to connect the physical and energetic body. Some people have referred to these chakras as our own invisible, rechargeable batteries that connect our spiritual bodies to our physical ones. (Read more about chakras on page 64.)
Healing touch has been used to help treat headaches, anxiety, and insomnia. (Klein, 2014; Keller et al, 1986; Marta et al, 2010) Many say the treatment produces a state of deep calm and relaxation. Research has shown that healing touch can also help with wound healing and decreased pain, which is why many hospitals are incorporating it into their surgery centers and cancer departments. (O’Mathuna et al, 2003)
Reiki
Reiki means universal life energy and was developed in Japan by Mikao Usui, who was inspired to devise a system of spiritual development that would be accessible to all people. He wanted a holistic system that could take the follower on a path to enlightenment without the constraints of organized religion. One of Usui’s most famous quotes explains the essence of Reiki: “The Universe is me, and I am the Universe. The Universe exists in me, and I exist in the Universe. Light exists in me, and I exist in the light.”
Like healing touch, Reiki healers feel the blocks in your energy and they can help rebalance this energy by using light or near-the-body touch. There is also a distant healing that can be sent. I have experienced firsthand the benefits of Reiki healing and have since been trained myself.
There are five elements of Reiki. These are:
1. The five spiritual principles or precepts
These are to be recited daily, to be followed throughout the day, or to be meditated upon:
Do not anger.
Do not worry.
Be humble.
Be honest in your work.
Be compassionate to yourself and others.
2. Breathing techniques
Breathing is so important to health and wellness. This includes diaphragmatic breathing and mindfulness breathing.
3. Hands-on palm healing
We all use our hands to heal—when we touch someone to hug or reassure them. We all give the comfort of touch. Reiki, or palm healing as it translates from the Japanese word tenohira, is a system of transmitting healing energy to oneself or others.
4. Symbols and mantras
A mantra, as I’ve mentioned earlier, is a word or sound that’s repeated as a form of meditation.
5. Attunements
An attunement is a form of spiritual empowerment that passes through the teacher to the student, activating the ability to draw in more energy based on individual need. This enables them to become more effective channels for the Reiki energy.
Massage Therapy
We’ve probably all enjoyed a good massage at one point or another and experienced firsthand its relaxing results. I know I have. Massage is one of my go-to treats for myself when I’ve had a lot on my plate. There are many different types of massage therapy, from Swedish massage (designed to promote relaxation) and hot stone massage (which uses heated stones and kneading to relax muscles) to sports massage (a therapeutic massage designed to knead trouble spots). There’s even facial massage to help relieve tension from the facial muscles.
The healing benefits of massage are well researched. By kneading the skin, a massage therapist is gently manipulating the muscles and soft tissue to get rid of knots in the muscles (which can develop from stress and spending too much time hunched over a computer), ultimately promoting relaxation. In doing this, massage actually causes levels of the stress hormone cortisol to decrease, which brings about immediate relaxation. It also causes the feel-good hormones serotonin and dopamine to increase, according to research published in the International Journal of Neuroscience. Massage has also been shown to do everything from reduce pain and speed recovery after injury to increase flexibility and boost relaxation. These are all good reasons to incorporate massage into your schedule whenever possible. (Adams et al, 2010; Caldwell, 2008; Brummitt, 2008)
I do want to add that you don’t need to pay for massage to reap its benefits; self-massage also can have relaxation benefits. Rolling a tennis ball along the bottom of your bare or socked feet with firm pressure—while sitting or standing—is a form of both massage and acupressure. It works out the tense muscles in your feet but also engages relaxation pressure points on the bottom of the feet. A scalp massage is also a wonderful self-massage that you can do anytime. Place a palm on either side of the head, bending your fingers so just your fingertips are touching the scalp. Press your fingertips into the scalp with light pressure and move them over your scalp. You can also run your fingertips lightly over your face, starting with your chin and moving your way up your cheeks and across your forehead. (Lindgren et al, 2010; Galatzer-Levy, 2014)
Osteopathy
Osteopathy is a form of medicine founded by Andrew Taylor Still in 1874 that focuses on total body, or holistic, health. This is the form of medicine that I practice. Osteopathic doctors like myself place an emphasis on self-healing and preventive medicine. We believe the body functions as an integral unit, not as a collection of separate parts.
Osteopathic physicians are also trained in osteopathic manipulative treatment or hands-on care to diagnose, treat, and prevent illness or injury. The techniques utilize stretching, gentle pressure, and resistance to help balance the body’s nervous, circulatory, and lymphatic systems, thereby contributing to overall health. Some osteopaths also use very gentle movements of your skull and the bone at the bottom of the spine called the sacrum (a treatment called cranial osteopathy or craniosacral therapy).
Osteopathic manipulative treatment has been shown to relieve pain, particularly back or neck pain. Inflammatory skin diseases also get relief from osteopathic manipulation, which helps to promote lymphatic flow, thereby boosting the immune system.
The key concepts of osteopathy are:
1. The body is a unit. Each person is a unit of body, mind, and spirit.
2. The body is capable of self-regulation, self-healing, and health maintenance. When normal adaptability is disrupted, or when environmental changes overcome the body’s capacity for self-maintenance, disease may develop.
3. Structure and function are linked. This is the belief that abnormal tissue structure is likely to result in disruptions in tissue function and vice versa.
Yoga
Most think of yoga as a physical activity, which it is, but it actually started in India five thousand years ago as a philosophical system to unite the body, mind, and spirit. The word yoga is Sanskrit for “union.” It’s intended to improve concentration and meditation by quieting the body, the nervous system, and the mind through the use of asanas or yoga poses and calming, diaphragmatic breathwork. It also increases muscle tone and flexibility and is a powerful stress management tool that leads to deep relaxation as well as clear-mindedness, energy, and confidence. (Hartfiel et al, 2011) (See page 113 for different types of yoga and their benefits.)
Evidence suggests that regular practice of yoga can do everything from preventing heart disease to helping symptoms of carpel tunnel syndrome, chronic back pain, insomnia, and digestive disorders like IBS. (Garfinkle et al, 1998; Tilbrook et al, 2011; Khalsa, 2004; Kuttner et al, 2006)
One aspect of yoga that’s a powerful way of aligning mind, body, and spirit is using mudras or hand positions while doing poses or during meditation. How you position your hands during yoga helps to channel energy coming into, and flowing through, the body. Each finger symbolizes a different natural element: the thumb symbolizes space, the index finger symbolizes air, the middle finger symbolizes fire, the ring finger symbolizes water, and the pinky finger symbolizes the earth.
While there are hundreds of mudras, here are some of my favorite ones:
Gyan mudra: This is the iconic meditation mudra with the tip of the forefinger and tip of the thumb gently touching each other. (Keep the other three fingers straight or slightly bent.) It’s called the mudra of knowledge because it helps to increase concentration and focus, sharpening the memory and the mind.
Prana mudra: Also called the mudra of life, this mudra involves touching the tips of your ring and pinky finger to the tip of your thumb. Keep the other two fingers straight or slightly bent. This mudra helps to activate energy or prana, considered the life force, in your body, reducing fatigue.
Dhyana mudra: This mudra involves your right hand resting on top of your left palm with the tips of both thumbs touching, while resting both hands in your lap. This is the perfect mudra to do while sitting and meditating, as the right hand symbolizes enlightenment. The left hand symbolizes illusion. Doing this mudra can bring peace and tranquility.
Visualization/Guided Imagery
What you are thinking about and focusing on can manifest in your life. This is the basis of visualization and guided imagery, a meditation technique in which you close your eyes and use your imagination to create peaceful, relaxing visual images in your mind, perhaps of a goal or a dream. You can do this while relaxing and/or doing your daily breathing exercises. Often, visualization is guided, meaning someone (for example, in a relaxation, meditation, or yoga class or via an app or digital recording) helps “guide” the images you can picture in your mind.
With visualization, you can add details to your image, like color, sound, motion, and smell. You can even add a song or music. (To engage all the senses, soft music can be playing, a candle can be lit, and/or aromatherapy scents can surround you.) For example, if sitting by the ocean listening to the waves is relaxing to you, you can close your eyes and visualize sitting on the beach with the feel of the cool, wet sand between your toes. You can imagine the sound of the ocean waves hitting the shore and receding. You can envision the sound of seagulls overhead and the feel of the salty ocean mist on your skin and in your hair. While visualizing a scene like this, the entire body calms down and becomes more at peace.
The goal of visualization is to engage all the senses to make a connection between the brain and the involuntary nervous system. When the brain’s visual cortex is activated without having direct input from the eyes (for instance, when we vividly picture a pleasing activity), our brain believes it is experiencing what we’re visualizing, thus shifting our attention and helping clear negative thoughts. In this way, visualization can help promote relaxation and healing. Often the best time to use imagery is just before falling asleep and just after waking up.
Visualization has been shown to help lower blood pressure, reduce anxiety and depression, and help you sleep better. There are many researchers and wound care specialists who believe you can help your body heal wounds and fight disease by visualizing the anatomy or symptoms of the disease and how they are being fixed or corrected. (Papantonio, 1998) For example, if you’re undergoing cancer therapy, you can imagine your immune cells fighting the cancer cells or the chemotherapy helping to eliminate the cancer cells. Taking time to focus on your body and its powerful ability to heal itself can’t hurt. At best, it will relax you, which we know can boost your immune system.
When visualizing, explore not just what you want but also who you are or who you want to be. You can use the words “I am” followed by what you want to manifest into physical reality. You can use these daily too, for manifesting more than just relaxation. For example, you can repeat any of these phrases silently: I am peaceful, I am healthy, I am beautiful, I am confident, I am strong, I am intelligent, I am successful, I am creative, and I am loving. Put as much detail into the visualization as possible. Think about how you feel when you have what it is you want to manifest. Think about how it looks and feels in your hands. Envision it in detail. You are able to attract into your life all that you desire.
To get started, sit or lie down in a quiet place. Close your eyes. Take deep, regular, quiet breaths. Then begin to picture yourself in a beautiful place, real or imagined. For example, imagine that you’re in a grassy field near a small running stream with a clear sky overhead. Make it as real as possible by including sounds, smells, colors, and physical sensations. You can focus on the breath, but don’t make any attempt to control your breath. Focus for about five minutes.
Here are some favorite visualizations, created from the visualizations that so many people have shared with me and inspired me with over the years. The wonderful thing about visualizations is you can take inspiration from anywhere and create your own as well, depending on your own goals. (Wientjes, 2002)
Manifesting Visualization
Sit still in a quiet place. Breathe normally or gently. Breathe in through the nose and out through pursed lips. Breathe with intention.
Focus on something that has meaning to you. It could be a sound (“ahhh” for awakening of the day or light or “om” for sleep or rest), a picture, a statue, or your breath.
Envision breathing in everything that you want and breathing out that which is not holding your peace or is hurting you. Breathe out the bad memories or the hurt. Take in what you need and breathe out what is not serving your soul well.
Envision that you’re breathing it out to the earth. The earth will process it, change it, and bring it back as beauty.
To remind yourself of this process, surround yourself with nature’s beauty every day (e.g., a plant or cut flowers). Picture what you want.
You can do this anywhere, anytime, for what you want to see in your life. Bring what you want in the universe to you. Act as if it is already there and think of it all the time. Continually improve upon the idea. Refine it. Manifest it. Most importantly, keep it a secret. Then others’ negative energies or doubts won’t interrupt your goals.
Cleansing and healing visualization: Sit quietly and practice gentle, rhythmic breathing. Press your tongue against the roof of your mouth and breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.
Picture a hunter-green-colored liquid soap and a washcloth in your hands. Take your left hand and move clockwise and your right hand and move counterclockwise, washing your body from head to toe with the washcloth and the green liquid. Picture each of your body parts inside and outside, and picture washing away any areas that are injured or in need of extra care.
If you feel like you’re getting stuck in any one spot, stay in that spot and continue to wash until you get unstuck. Then let all of the unhealthy cells and green soap drain away. Release it into the ground. Then picture a bright white light. Visualize yourself washing with this healing light from head to toe, inside your body and out. Then let the white light drain out of your feet into the earth.
World peace visualization: Sit quietly in a peaceful, safe place. Be sure your phone, TV, computer, and any electronic devices are shut off. Close your eyes and take deep, rhythmic breaths in and out, in and out.
Now picture a globe of light. This globe represents the earth and the world. Feel its light, its color, and its vibration. Take a moment to revel in all that this globe is. Think about its amazing qualities, its beauty, its spiritual strength.
Now visualize a healing light enveloping this globe, with the light growing brighter and more intense. Picture harmony, well-being, and peace toward this globe. Continue to project this healing light and love onto this globe. Feel the safety and security of this healing light.
Visualize your desires for this globe: peace, love, goodness. Visualize all the people in the globe bathing in this healing light. Visualize them living in harmony and love.
Continue to visualize the globe being bathed in this light as you open your eyes and gradually become aware of your surroundings.
Take this visualization with you as you move through your daily life. Any time you hear negative news about the world, take several deep breaths and visualize this glowing light spreading healing and peace.
Meditation
This is the practice in which you can clear your mind by training it to concentrate and cut out all distractions. It helps you stop the inner chatter, which can be a source of worry, insecurity, negativity, and anger. Meditation is a method by which you can remember that you’re not the voice of your mind, you’re merely the one who hears it day in and day out. Through meditation, you can separate yourself from this inner chatter, a skill that will help you through many situations in life and that can bring peace. As the Hindu scripture the Bhagavad Gita says, “With a quiet mind, seek harmony within yourself.”
The more you practice meditation, the more in control your mind will be. It will have less of a tendency to wander off in all different thought directions as it’s prone to do thanks to our super busy lives. Many meditation proponents believe that meditation stimulates the transformative power of the brain and provides you with great conviction and strength to change the course of your life. This more focused approach to life manifests itself in how we act every day and how we look, too. Those of my patients who meditate regularly exude a calmer demeanor and a more radiant glow from their skin. They look and feel younger and are happier, too.
Consistent daily practice of meditation has been shown to alter our response to stress, which influences serotonin production, helping to regulate mood, sleep, and appetite. It’s also been shown to boost heart health by decreasing heart and respiratory rates as well as your risk of heart attack and stroke.
If you’ve tried meditation and just don’t love it, you may be doing the wrong kind of meditation for you. In fact, when it comes to meditation, one size or kind of meditation definitely does not fit all. Here’s a guide to finding the type that’s best suited to you:
1. Chakra Meditation
This is typically used when an area of your body is unhealthy, which is why it’s also called healing meditation. Using specific meditations for the major chakras or energy centers in the body, you can visualize opening and cleansing these “areas” of the body. In doing so, you are also calming the body and the mind.
Root chakra (at the base of the spine) represents our foundation and plays a part in us feeling grounded. It’s associated with a sense of security and basic needs like food, water, a home, and safety. Feelings of fear (i.e., fear of letting go) and worry usually signal a blockage in this chakra. This chakra is typically linked to the reproductive organs, the kidneys, the spine, and the adrenal glands. A blockage in this chakra has also been linked to lower back and leg and foot problems.
The root chakra, which is the chakra closest to the earth, corresponds with the element of the earth and the sense of smell. To enhance a root chakra meditation, you can utilize specific earth-scented and grounding essential oils like patchouli or cypress (i.e., through a diffuser). And while meditating, repeat a mantra that grounds you, such as “I am strong and I am stable” or “lam” (pronounced laah mm), which is the sound that vibrates with this chakra. Visualizing a lotus flower in deep red (the color of the root chakra) at the base of your spine and your pelvic floor while meditating can also help to open this chakra.
Sacral chakra (in the lower abdomen) rules our sense of abundance and well-being, as well as pleasure, emotions, and sexuality. Depression, fear of change, and sometimes even addiction issues usually indicate a blockage in this chakra. It’s this chakra that’s associated with the bladder, prostate, ovaries, kidneys, gallbladder, and spleen. Chronic lower back pain, constipation, urinary or kidney infections, and gynecological problems are all associated with a blocked sacral chakra.
It’s the sacral chakra that corresponds with the sense of taste and the water element, which is why doing this meditation while listening to sounds of water—be it sitting near a body of water outdoors or listening to it via an app or an indoor home fountain—can help to open this chakra. Essential oils of ylang ylang or neroli can help to open this chakra during meditation. (For more information on aromatherapy, see page 59.) And while meditating, you can repeat a mantra like “I embrace life fully” or “vam” (pronounced vaaah mmm), which is the sound linked to the sacral chakra. Visualizing a crescent moon in orange (the color associated with this chakra) over the lower abdomen while you’re meditating can also help to open this chakra.
Solar plexus chakra (in the upper abdomen) represents our ability to be self-confident and at peace with oneself. Anger and lack of direction are usually signs of a blockage in this chakra, as are overeating and excessive fatigue. This chakra is associated with the intestines and digestive function, pancreas, liver, bladder, stomach, and upper spine.
The solar plexus chakra corresponds with the sense of vision and element of fire and heat—doing this meditation while outdoors in the sun or close to a candle or fire can help to open this chakra. Using citrusy essential oils of wild orange or grapefruit while meditating can help to ground this chakra, too. And while meditating, repeat a mantra like “I am at peace with myself and my surroundings” or “ram” (pronounced raaah mmm), which is the sound associated with this chakra. Picturing a beautiful sunflower in vibrant yellow (the color associated with this chakra) in the upper abdomen, right above your belly button, while you’re meditating can also help to open this chakra. Imagine, too, this warm yellow light spreading throughout your entire body.
Heart chakra (in the chest) rules love. It’s where the physical and the spiritual parts of ourselves meet. Lack of compassion and inhumanity typically manifest when this chakra is blocked, as does anger, impatience, jealousy, and fear of betrayal. This chakra rules the heart and the lungs. Insomnia, an increase in blood pressure, and reduced immune function are usually associated with an imbalance in this chakra.
The heart chakra corresponds with the sense of touch and the element of air—why breathing in deeply and diaphragmatically during this meditation will help to open this chakra. Essential oils of rose or jasmine while meditating can help to open this chakra. And while meditating, you can repeat a mantra like “I love myself and I am open to love” or “yam” (pronounced yaah mm), which is the sound that activates this chakra. Picture a ball of pulsating energy in green (the color associated with this chakra) in the heart area while you’re meditating to help open this chakra. Imagine, as you meditate, that this green ball is getting brighter and more vibrant and spreading throughout your entire body.
Throat chakra (in the middle of the throat) governs our ability to express ourselves. Creative blocks and problems communicating (speaking too much or inappropriately, fear of public speaking, excessive gossiping, or having trouble listening) usually indicate an imbalance with this chakra. It’s this chakra that’s associated with the respiratory system, the thyroid gland, and the mouth. A chronic sore throat, hoarseness, thyroid problems, and dental issues may be signs of a blocked throat chakra.
The throat chakra corresponds with the element of space and sense of hearing—using a strong ocean breath, which emits an “ocean” sound, during this meditation can help to open this area. (For steps on how to do the ocean breath, see page 113.) Calming essential oils of lavender or Roman chamomile help to ground this chakra during meditation. And while meditating, repeat a mantra like “I release the fears that block me and speak my truth with love” or “hum” (pronounced haah mmm), which is the sound associated with this chakra. Picturing a bright orb in crystal blue (the color associated with this chakra) in the throat area while meditating can help to remove blockages from this chakra.
Third eye chakra (between the brows) rules imagination, intuition or our “sixth sense,” and wisdom. An imbalance in this chakra usually manifests with mental rigidity and a lack of foresight, inspiration, creativity, and spiritual wisdom. The eyes, brain, and pituitary gland are all ruled by this chakra. Headaches, sinus pain, fogginess or mental confusion, and eye problems are associated with a blockage in this chakra.
The third eye chakra corresponds with the sense of intuition and the element of light—why meditating near a candle can help to open this area. Utilizing essential oils of sandalwood or rosemary while meditating can help to ground this chakra too. And while meditating, repeat a mantra like “I trust my deepest wisdom and follow my life’s purpose” or “sham” (pronounced shah mmm), which is the sound connected with this chakra. Visualizing a bright light in purple or indigo (the color associated with the third eye chakra) glowing on your forehead between your eyes and radiating light around it also helps to balance out this chakra.
Crown chakra (on the top of the head) governs inner and outer beauty, a connection to a higher consciousness, and our spirituality. Feelings of isolation, a loss of identity, closed-mindedness, and cynicism usually indicate a problem with this chakra, which is associated with the brain stem, spinal cord, and pineal gland (responsible for secreting the sleep-promoting hormone melatonin). Symptoms of a blocked crown chakra include a sensitivity to light, migraines, nervous system imbalances, ear tingling, and chronic fatigue.
The crown chakra corresponds with the sense of empathy and element of thought and universal consciousness—why meditating in a quiet, peaceful area is important while doing this meditation. Using essential oils of lime or frankincense can help to ground this chakra during meditation. And while meditating, repeat a mantra like “I am connected with the wisdom of the universe” or “om” (pronounced aau mm), which is the universal meditation sound that’s associated specifically with this chakra. Visualizing a lotus flower with a thousand petals in bright white (the color associated with this chakra) radiating from your head while you’re meditating can also help to open this chakra.
2. Heart-Centered Meditation
During this meditation, you focus on the heart area while inhaling and exhaling, a technique that helps to relax you but also brings compassion, harmony, and unconditional love into the heart to release fears and sadness and “heal” the heart.
To start, find a comfortable sitting position. Put your right hand over your heart and heart chakra. Then place your left hand over the right hand, with your thumbs touching. Take slow, deep diaphragmatic breaths in and out now and continue to breathe slowly throughout this entire meditation. Feel your heartbeat. Feel the warmth of your heart center with your hands. Continue to breathe. If your mind wanders, gently bring it back to your heart. Continue using this healing touch, but now visualize your hands sending radiant healing white light into your heart. With each breath in, keep visualizing this white light entering your heart as you recite the mantras “compassion,” “healing,” “harmony,” and “love.” Do this for five to ten minutes.
3. Mindfulness Mediation
During this meditation, you focus on the breath or a mantra without letting your mind fill up with thoughts. You can do this type of meditation anywhere (e.g., while running, horseback riding, or kayaking). It is based on the idea that you can be mindful in the moment, cutting out all other distractions, in an effort to relax and clear the mind.
You can also do this meditation while you’re eating. The more mindful you are during meals, the more satisfied you’ll be and the less food you’ll be hungry for later on. To practice mindfulness meditation while you’re eating, hold a fruit like a grape or a piece of popcorn in your hand. Think about how it looks. What is the color, size, and shape? Next, think about how it feels. Is it heavy, light, smooth, or rough? What does it smell like? Then, place the food in your mouth without chewing it. Think about how it feels. What is the texture like? Now chew it slowly. How does it feel and taste? You don’t have to do each of these steps as you eat every meal, but the goal is to focus on the aspects of food as you chew and swallow, particularly how each bite tastes and feels in your mouth.
4. Transcendental Meditation
During this meditation, sit with your eyes closed and your back straight (ideally in the lotus or half lotus position) while focusing on and repeating a sound or mantra. To sit in the lotus or half lotus position, sit cross-legged with your feet placed on opposing thighs, your spine straight. (Support the knee of your top leg with a folded blanket under it if you’re not able to rest it on the floor). If this position is too difficult, you can always sit in a simple cross-legged easy pose, with each foot beneath the opposite knee.
How to Meditate
While there are different types of meditation, all involve directing awareness inward by focusing on an object in the mind’s eye, a mantra, or the breath. There are plenty of apps and free guided meditations (I like UCLA Mindful Awareness Center’s free guided meditations; you can find them at marc.ucla.edu) that can help you learn how to quiet your mind. Follow these steps to get started:
1. Choose a quiet place where you won’t be interrupted. Find a comfortable place to sit or lie down. If sitting, ideally you want to sit with your back straight in a lotus or half lotus posture, though this isn’t necessary. Allow the tips of your thumb and index finger to touch, forming a circle. Rest the back of your hands on the lower thighs. Keep your palms open and inward to the heart in what’s called the “knowledge position.”
2. Focus. Keep your eyes open in a soft downward gaze, looking four to six feet ahead on the floor in front of you. The idea is that you’re not shutting down your awareness of the space around you, but are relaxing your focus somewhat.
While meditating, if your mind begins to wander, bring it back to your breath, without judgment. Just keep practicing this. As your mind wanders, bring it back. When it wanders again, bring it back again. It’s important not to repress thoughts or follow them. Just simply let them be as they are, notice them, and then return your attention to your breath. It was the Buddhist meditation master Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche who said that when you are sitting like this, you have a flat bottom and your thoughts also have a flat bottom. Before your thoughts had little wings and were flying all around and taking you with them, but now your body is settled and your mental activity will settle down as well.
Some people find it helpful to have a mantra (a single word or sound like “ohm”) or an image to focus on. Then every time your mind drifts, you simply refocus it with your mantra or visual image. Or you can just make the breath your image and your mantra. Some mantras to try:
• Om or Ohm is a classic meditation mantra that is said to contain the vibration of the sound of the universe and the beginning, middle, and end or the past, present, and future. It’s a simple mantra that you can repeat at the end of each day to prepare your mind and body ready for rest.
• Om Mani Padme Hum, a Buddhist Tibetan mantra, helps to get rid of jealousy, desire, ego, and hatred. It’s six syllables and each one has a meaning:
• Om (ohm) destroys attachments to ego and establishes generosity.
• Ma (mah) removes the attachment to jealousy and establishes ethics.
• Ni (nee) removes the attachment to desire and establishes patience.
• Pad (pahd) removes the attachment to prejudice and establishes perseverance.
• Me (meh) removes the attachment to possessiveness and establishes concentration.
• Hum (hum) removes the attachment to hatred and establishes wisdom.
• Sa Ta Na Ma promotes balance for better sleep, when repeated over and over quietly before bedtime. Translated, it means “birth, life, death, rebirth.”
• Har Har Makande helps remove anxiety and fear. You can repeat it before bed or before doing or encountering something that scares you. It means “the infinite creator liberates me.”
• Om, Aguusti, Shina (sha he nah) also helps promote deep sleep. Its rhythmic sounds, repeated silently or whispered over and over, help lull you into sleep.
• Ahhh is a calming mantra. While saying it, visualize a pleasant and productive day. You can use this to visualize how you want your own day to begin or just repeat it quietly when you’re trying to relax. The “ahhh” mantra is also considered to be the sound of the heart chakra and is associated with love and compassion for yourself and for others.
3. Try to meditate five minutes a day. Then slowly work up to fifteen to thirty minutes once or twice a day. If you can’t fit in a complete session, try to fit in a few minutes. To help you, set a meditation timer, which can use the sound of a relaxing chime or Tibetan singing bowls. Many are available today as apps for your phone. This way, you won’t have to be constantly looking at the clock to figure out how much longer you have to meditate. One I like is the free Insight Meditation Timer, available on most devices.
Keep in mind that, as with learning any new skill, practice is key. Being able to push aside all the thoughts in your brain to focus on your breath will become a little easier each time you do it.
Meditations for Modern Life
Try one or all of these meditations, adapting them to you and what you want and need. Remember, meditations are intensely personal. There is no right or wrong way to do them. The most important part of meditation is taking deep, relaxing breaths and focusing your thoughts, allowing other thoughts to pass gently from the mind.
1. Healthy Relationships Meditation:
“I Am Open to Attracting Love”
This meditation connects you to your heart space, opening it up to attract love for both yourself and others. The more you practice this, the more you’ll attract love into your life. As an option, you can do this meditation holding a rose quartz crystal in one or in both palms, which helps realign the heart chakra (see more about crystals later in this chapter).
Lie in a comfortable shavasana or corpse yoga pose position, with your heels spread wide, arms a few inches from the body with palms facing upward. (When palms are facing upward, it positions you in an open receiving mode.)
Close your eyes and allow yourself to relax. Take deep, gentle breaths in and out. Picture yourself in the most beautiful garden, a garden of love. See the beautiful flowers. Smell the sweet scents. Bathe in the golden sunlight.
Start to consciously relax the muscles in your body, starting with your facial muscles, down to your neck muscles, into your chest muscles, and all the way to your toes. As you do this, spread the warm golden loving sunlight from the garden through each part of your body.
Bathe in the warmth of this golden light. Feel its heat, revel in its radiance. Allow other thoughts that come in your mind to pass gently, without judgment. Continue to take your deep, rhythmic, relaxing breaths.
Now visualize your heart. Consciously open the blinds of your heart and let in this golden sunlight from the garden of love. Revel in the warmth of this light as it bathes your heart, as your heart becomes ripe for love. Open your heart to pure overflowing love.
Repeat (silently to yourself or out loud) this mantra: Love is in me. I am worthy of love.
Now say goodbye to this beautiful sunlit garden, but know that you can come back any time to feed your heart, to grow in love. Gradually open your eyes and lie quietly, listening to your rhythmic breathing. Stretch your arms and legs, doing whatever feels comfortable to you. Slowly get up. And remember, you are blessed with love.
2. Prosperity Meditation: “I Want to Attract Abundance into My Life”
This meditation opens your mind and spirit to having prosperity and wealth. As motivational speaker and author Wayne Dyer once said, “Abundance is not something we acquire. It’s something we tune in to.”
Sit quietly and comfortably. Close your eyes. Place your palms face up on your legs, ready to receive abundance. Take gentle, rhythmic breaths in and out. As you breathe in, visualize the prosperity and abundance that you are welcoming into your life. Visualize, in vivid detail, the things you are now ready to receive with open arms. (Setting an intention of what you want in life helps to focus your energy on receiving this.)
Allow negative thoughts and habits regarding money, wealth, and abundance to flow out of your body with each breath out. Continue to do this, allowing negative energy and fears to enter and leave your consciousness, without judgment.
As you breathe in and out, repeat this mantra: I attract wealth and prosperity with every breath I take.
Allow yourself to breathe in and out rhythmically for several more breaths before opening your eyes and returning your focus to the world around you.
3. Healing Meditation: “I Am Strong, I Am Healthy”
This meditation helps guide healing in the body, both physically and emotionally. It can be done any time—while at home or at work or waiting in a doctor’s office.
Sit or lie in a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Breathe gently in and out.
Give your entire body permission to relax, to just be for a while. Relax beginning with the muscles in your head and face, move down to your neck and then to your shoulders. Feel the breaths in your lungs as you relax your chest muscles. Take a moment to appreciate your body working for you—your lungs, your heart, your body working in tandem to keep you strong.
Now relax your arms, your hands, your abdomen, your back, your legs, and your feet. Continue to breathe gently in and out.
Focus on your heart beating. Appreciate the strength of your heart and everything it does for you.
Now visualize a bright white light in the form of a ball. As you breathe in, visualize this light spreading into your body, cleansing your body and your mind. Experience this light going through every part of your body, working to cleanse, purify, rejuvenate, and balance your whole being. Have this light concentrate on any areas that need extra healing. Envelop those areas with this white light.
Feel the light healing your body and your emotions. Now as you breathe out, consciously release negative energy from your body and mind.
As you are breathing in this light, repeat this mantra: “I am strong. I am healthy.”
Continue to bathe in the light, taking deep, relaxing breaths. As you breathe in, visualize more light infusing your body. As you breathe out, visualize negative energy leaving your body.
Gently open your eyes when you’re ready and slowly become aware of everything around you. Give yourself time before you get up and get back into your life.
4. Shower Meditation: “I Attract Positivity”
This meditation helps you rid yourself of negative thoughts and energy and helps you jump-start healthier habits and attitudes. You can do this quick meditation in the shower every morning if you have time.
Close your eyes. Feel the water running from your head to your toes. Become aware of this sensation and how the water feels as it hits every part of your body. Allow your mind to quiet as you focus on the sound and feel of the running water. Slowly breathe in and out for the count of ten breaths.
As the water runs down your body into the drain, visualize that it takes with it all the negativity in your life. Picture the water forming a glowing protective ring around your body, shielding you from negativity and stress.
Gently open your eyes and resume your shower or get out and dry off.
5. Commuting Meditation: “I Love What I Do”
This meditation helps reduce work stress and frustration and makes room for creativity and inspiration. Try this on your commute to work.
Relax your shoulders and sit comfortably in your seat. Keep your eyes open, with your hands on the wheel if you’re driving and stuck in traffic. Take deep rhythmic breaths in and out for the count of ten.
Bring your awareness to what or who is causing your stress and creativity block. Be aware of how it makes you feel.
Say this mantra quietly or internally to this feeling: “I love what I do. I am good at what I do. I choose to see this situation [or person] differently from this point on.”
As you exhale, visualize the negativity and frustration and stress leaving your body. As you inhale, visualize positivity and inspiration filling your body and mind. Continue to do this for ten breaths in and out or until you’re out of traffic.
6. Everyday Meditation: “My Life Is
Filled with Happiness and Gratitude”
This meditation helps bring light when your world seems filled with darkness and despair. Both Buddhism and Taoism teach this as the inner smile meditation.
Sit on a chair or lie comfortably on the floor. Rest your right hand on top of your left palm, in your lap, with the tips of both thumbs touching. Close your eyes and breathe rhythmically in and out for the count of ten.
Let your jaw relax and smile as you would smile to another person. Let the smile fill your face. If your smile fades, just continue to bring it back without judgment while you continue to breathe.
Visualize what you have to be grateful for. Gently push aside the negative thoughts that make their way into your mind and insert happy thoughts. Continue to smile while breathing in and out. Then after each breath in, repeat this mantra: “I choose to be happy. Life is good.”
Then slowly exhale. After ten breaths, allow yourself to open your eyes and smile for yourself and the world.
7. Bedtime Meditation: “I Will Get Restful Sleep”
This meditation helps improve insomnia and quality of sleep. You can listen to soft sleep-inducing music without words, too, as long as you’re not gazing at a computer or phone screen while you’re listening.
To do this meditation, simply lie on your back or side, whichever is more comfortable for you. Take ten deep, slow breaths in and out.
Let your mind wander at first and then slowly bring your mind to this mantra, which you will repeat over and over: “Om, agasti (ah-gah-sti) shahina (sha-he-nah).”
Focus on the slow hypnotic rhythm of your breath in and out along with this mantra, “om, ah gah sti, sha he nah.” As worries or anxious thoughts enter your mind, let them gently float away on a fluffy white cloud.
Continue to breathe and focus on your mantra until you drift off to sleep.
Aromatic plants have been used in healing for millennia, and essential oils have been used since the Middle Ages. Modern aromatherapy was founded, and the term was coined, in the 1920s by French chemist René-Maurice Gattefossé. After burning his hand in a lab explosion, he put the burned skin in a bowl of lavender oil and was surprised to find that his burns healed quickly without infection, pain, or scarring. He then started investigating essential oils for treating various skin conditions. He studied oils from flowers, leaves, fruits, barks, and roots and how they affected physical and mental health.
In France and Japan, medical aromatherapy is an established and accepted field. The theory behind it is that when we breathe in certain scents through the nose, these scents send chemical messages through nerves to the brain, triggering emotional and physiological effects that can influence the immune, circulatory, and respiratory systems. Science aside, I can speak firsthand to the benefits of aromatherapy: the scents of lavender and ylang ylang essential oils definitely help me feel more relaxed.
There are plenty of options for using essential oils: apply lotions or creams with essential oils in them; rub roller balls filled with essential oils on the wrists, temples, base of the neck, or behind the ears; and use them in diffusers, which infuse the air around you with scent. A few words of caution about essential oils, however: essential oils should never be applied directly to the skin, especially if you have sensitive skin, as they can trigger irritation. They should always be diluted first with what’s called a carrier oil (examples include fractionated coconut oil, sweet almond oil, grapeseed oil, and jojoba oil).
Crystal Therapy
Crystals, minerals, and gems have been used for thousands of years to bring about emotional and physical balance. References to crystals date back to the ancient Sumerians and ancient Egyptians. Crystals, known for their religious connotations, have also played a part in all religions throughout history, with people reaching for crystals to help bring about spiritual wellness and balance. Today, crystals (a word that means “frozen light”) are used for meditation and during Reiki, and to help focus or concentrate energies.
While there is no concrete evidence or research pointing to the benefits of crystals, there is plenty of anecdotal evidence from those who speak about the power of crystals. I myself am instinctively drawn to crystals, particularly while doing Reiki and meditation. My belief: if you believe in the energy of crystals, they can help in your own life.
Here’s how they’re thought to work: we know that our bodies are energetic and that we each vibrate an energy and emit energy. The universe vibrates energy too, and our thoughts create vibrations in the universe. Using semi-precious stones from the earth, proponents of crystal therapy employ the healing powers of crystals. By opening your heart and mind to crystals, you’re becoming in tune with their energy and connection with the healing powers of the earth. Bottom line: If you’re drawn to crystals and believe in their energy, this positive energy can help in your own life.
There’s something to be said for the idea that crystals help to focus our energies and our intentions. In fact, setting intentions while using crystals helps to amplify these goals. To set an intention, close your eyes and allow your breath to slow and become relaxed. Clear your mind of any daily stresses and think of things that make you happy. State aloud what you want your crystal to help you with (for example, “I want to be free from the negative energy of other people” or “I want to strive to be my happiest, most loving self”).
How to Cleanse and Energize with Crystals
Experts in crystals say the stones choose you instead of you choosing the stones. To pick one, hold it while you’re feeling calm, and see how it makes you feel. Does it make you feel energized or depleted? Are you calm while holding the stone or are you agitated? Pay attention to your feelings and use these feelings to guide your choice of crystal. It’s important, too, to energize a crystal before using it. To do this, you can hold it under water, set it with a cleansing stone like quartz, or place it in sunlight or moonlight. You can also use sound vibrations: place it in the center of a Tibetan singing bowl, tap the bowl with the wooden mallet while holding it gently or while it sits on a pillow, then circle the bowl with the mallet, allowing the vibrations to cleanse the crystal.
Some of the most popular crystals include:
• Agate: helps increase self confidence
• Amethyst: relieves stress and brings balance back into your life, making it a perfect stone for meditation
• Angelite: helps with happy, soothing sleep
• Amazonite: soothing; helps to decrease irritation
• Aventurine: helps increase abundance
• Black tourmaline: helps you get rid of bad habits; it also helps protect you from the negative energy of others
• Blue calcite: calming; it helps boost powers of communication
• Blue celestite: brings tranquility and harmony to your space and your spirit; it’s also referred to as a “cosmic lullaby”
• Brown calcite: grounding; it boosts feelings of security
• Carnelian: helps to inspire creativity
• Citrine (natural): helps bring abundance to your life; it helps create a positive outlook
• Clear quartz: amplifies your intentions; this stone also helps to cleanse the energy from other crystals
• Fluorite: helps clear mental and emotional confusion, making it a perfect stone to have while meditating
• Garnet: helps improve health; it grounds you
• Green calcite: improves finances
• Green aventurine: cleanses negativity, promotes harmony and balance, encourages good luck and prosperity
• Halite: encourages self-love; it lifts depression
• Hematite: helps ground you and reconnects you with the earth
• Kyanite: helps to balance the chakras
• Labradorite: encourages self-awareness, heightens intuition and consciousness; it keeps physical, mental, and spiritual aspects in balance
• Lepidolite: imparts a sense of calm during stressful times; it balances mind and spirit
• Malachite: inspires courage for risk taking and change
• Moonstone: helps balance out emotions
• Orange calcite: boosts passion and joy
• Red jasper: helps ground you spiritually; it encourages emotional balance
• Rose quartz: realigns the heart chakra, opening you up to self-love and the love of others; this crystal is good to have in the bedroom
• Selenite: helps cleanse negative energy from the body; it’s good to place by your bed to help you sleep at night
• Sodalite: strengthens your inner sixth sense or intuition; it helps release tension and fears
• Shungite: protects from dangerous energy, which is why some keep one near their cell phone, computer, and Wi-Fi to protect from harmful radiation
• Turquoise: helps ward off negativity and strengthen love and friendship bonds; it’s a healing stone
You can place crystals on one or more of your seven chakras or spiritual energy centers to help you help tap in to your body’s vibrational energy and amplify what you want. Prana or chi flows throughout these chakras, which, as I mentioned earlier, correspond with specific organs and systems in the body. When any of these energy centers are blocked (see below), certain symptoms can manifest themselves.
• Root chakra: A red jasper crystal can be placed on the root chakra for grounding.
• Sacral chakra: A carnelian crystal can be placed on the sacral chakra to enhance peace and self-confidence.
• Solar plexus chakra: A citrine crystal can be placed on the solar plexus chakra to dissipate negative energy.
• Heart chakra: A green aventurine crystal can be placed on the heart chakra to align physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
• Throat chakra: A sodalite crystal can be placed on the throat chakra to enhance group communication.
• Third eye chakra: An amethyst crystal can be placed on the third eye chakra to encourage spirituality.
• Crown chakra: A clear quartz crystal can be placed on the crown chakra to clear away negative energy and to provide clarity of consciousness.
Using Crystals in Your Home or Office
Feng shui, the art of arranging and designing your home or work space to promote healing and balance, uses crystals to help focus the energy of a space. I use crystals both at home and in my office. In fact, my staff knows how much I love crystals, so they bought me a labradorite crystal last year for my birthday. I keep it in my office, as it helps keep physical, mental, and spiritual aspects in balance. Here are some crystal uses in your home and work spaces.
To protect your space: Black tourmaline placed by the front door or office door helps to absorb negative energy.
To stay energized: Place quartz crystals at work or at home to help bring clarity of mind, so you can stay focused. They can also boost energy while simultaneously clearing the energy of your space.
For better sleep: There are plenty of crystals that can help promote good energy in your bedroom, such as angelite for happy dreams and lepidolite for enhancing restful sleep. Place them on your bedside table or under your pillow.
For healthier relationships: A bowl of rose quartz crystals placed in the bedroom or near your bedside helps promote love.
To attract wealth: Place citrine in your work areas at home and in your office to attract prosperity.
To relieve stress and promote peace: Place the blue celestite crystal on the areas of your body feeling tension and stress, while you take deep relaxation breaths.
Herbal Medicine
Herbal medicine relies on plants or plant extracts—which are rich in a variety of natural chemical compounds—as treatments. It’s been used since ancient times in many different cultures throughout the world as a way of keeping the body healthy and treating illness.
I am a big fan of using fresh and dried herbs while cooking. Some of my favorites include parsley, garlic, chives, rosemary, basil, thyme, dill, turmeric, and oregano. (See some of the recipes I use these herbs in the Healthy Mediterranean Recipes section on page 183.) They’re rich in antioxidants and have so many health-promoting benefits. When we use cooking herbs and spices that have disease-preventing effects, for example, we’re taking advantage of herbal health benefits. When using herbs, fresh or dried is always best. Here are some of the top health-promoting herbs and their benefits:
• Aloe reduces redness/swelling from burns and skin inflammation; it also calms skin.
• Arnica helps reduce bruising and swelling.
• Basil is an anti-inflammatory and antibacterial that may also fight viruses.
• Cilantro/coriander is a natural preservative/antibacterial that aids in detoxification.
• Cinnamon is an antifungal that also may help those with diabetes. Cinnamaldehyde, the compound that gives cinnamon its distinctive flavor and smell, is a powerful immune booster.
• Dill is an antibacterial that aids in digestion and is a breath freshener.
• Garlic is a powerful anti-inflammatory and immune booster.
• Ginger helps aid indigestion and nausea.
• Mint is a natural decongestant that also soothes indigestion; it calms and cools the skin in the case of insect bites, rashes, and other irritations.
• Oregano is a powerful antibacterial and anti-inflammatory.
• Parsley supports kidney function (and natural detoxification) and is an anti-inflammatory.
• Rosemary is a potent anti-inflammatory and may help keep eyesight sharp.
• Thyme is an antimicrobial and antibacterial that helps treat acne and skin fungal infections, and protects against foodborne infections.
• Turmeric/curcumin is a powerful anti-inflammatory and may help boost memory.
Music/Art Therapy
Indulging in creative pursuits like art, music, and dance is incredibly de-stressing. I know firsthand that they offer an outlet for expression and for our souls to speak, taking us out of the stresses of day-to-day life. This has been shown in healthcare centers that offer creative expression classes to patients and to caregivers as a way to express what they’re going through in a different way. Positive imagery and expression, through creative pursuits, can also benefit the viewer or listener. Research shows, for example, that calming, peaceful artwork in hospitals can help encourage a patient’s healing process, while the opposite—stark, depressing walls and even the wrong kind of art, like disturbing pictures—can cause physical distress and even hinder healing. There is also some evidence that art can help reduce hospital stays, too. Other studies show that art can help with quality of life for those suffering from Alzheimer’s disease.
Music, in particular, has incredible healing powers, something that so many of us already instinctively know from just listening to music and seeing the relaxing effect it has on us. Music as a healing influence has also been documented as far back as the time of Aristotle and Plato. The idea of music as therapy has been used to help the physical, emotional, cognitive, and social needs of individuals.
Modern-day music therapists work in hospitals, rehabilitative facilities, senior centers and nursing homes, and schools because the benefits of music have been widely documented in research. Some of the well-documented ways music therapy has been used are to alleviate surgical pain in conjunction with anesthesia or pain medication; to elevate patients’ mood and counteract depression; to promote movement for physical rehabilitation; to calm or sedate, often to induce sleep; to counteract apprehension or fear; and to lessen muscle tension for the purpose of relaxation. Music therapy is also used with the elderly to increase or maintain their level of physical, mental, and social/emotional functioning. The sensory and intellectual stimulation of music can help maintain a person’s quality of life. (Eureka Alert, 2015)
One study, conducted by researchers in China, used soothing music with patients undergoing thoracic surgery. It found that listening to just thirty minutes of soft music a day for three days helped these patients experience less postoperative pain and anxiety. Not to mention these patients also had lower blood pressure and heart rates. This finding was backed up by a comprehensive review of studies on the topic, conducted by British researchers, which found that patients who listen to music before, during, and after surgery had less pain and anxiety overall and had less need for pain medication. (Liu et al, 2015)
There’s also something called ambient music, which is a genre of music that puts an emphasis on tone and atmosphere over traditional musical rhythm, melody, composition, and words. It’s a form of slow instrumental music with repetitive, soothing sound patterns to generate a sense of calmness. Nature soundscapes are typically included in ambient music, along with sounds from the synthesizer, piano, strings, and flute. Drumming is also tremendously hypnotic and rhythmic and has the power to relax you. (Lies et al, 2015)
The power of music was something that I discovered firsthand when I was in junior high. My science class assignment was to write and perform an at-home experiment that could be measured somehow. I remember cooking with my grandmother on the Saturday afternoon after I was given my homework and thinking about what I wanted to measure. I knew that I had to keep it within a low budget, but I also wanted an “A.”
My grandmother and I were making an avocado salad at the time and it hit me: I would measure whether an avocado plant would grow any differently whether exposed to music or not. I loved listening to music then—and still do today—and intuitively, even at that young age, knew that music would probably make a difference in a plant’s growth. My grandmother gave me two pits from the avocados we were using for our salad, and I soaked them in water so they could take root.
When they had rooted, I planted them in soil. I positioned both plants in front of a window, on the same side of the house but in different rooms. One plant had constant low-level music playing next to it and the other didn’t. I then spent the next several weeks watering them with the same amount of water, carefully measuring their growth, and charting my results. As expected, the plant that was exposed to music grew significantly larger. (And yes, I did get an “A” on the assignment, which made me so happy and proud and planted the “seeds” for a career in holistic health and wellness!)
Plenty of research shows that being outdoors with fresh air, trees, and elements of nature including birds and wildlife helps to relax us and keep us healthy by reducing blood pressure, heart rate, muscle tension, and stress. In fact, sometimes there’s nothing that I love more than taking a meditative walk in the park in my free time. It’s mind clearing and incredibly calming.
Japanese researchers have shown that spending a short time in nature, called “forest bathing,” actually boosts the activity of immune cells, which help to fight illness and disease, for up to seven days. Other researchers from around the world have shown that walking outdoors among trees and wildlife boosts energy as well as creativity. (Morimoto et al, 2007)
Numerous studies have shown the stress-reducing benefits of being surrounded by nature. One study, published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Science, found that walking for just ninety minutes in nature actually reduced activity in an area of the brain called the subgenual prefrontal cortex, which is associated with anxiety and depression. Another Australian study found that taking regular forty-second “micro breaks” throughout the day to look at nature or even pictures of nature helps to reduce stress and mental fatigue. (Ryan et al, 2010; Jordan, 2015)
Nature can also boost a patient’s recovery and reduce pain. One study conducted at Texas A & M University found that patients who had a view of trees outside their hospital rooms actually healed faster and had less pain than those patients whose windows looked out at a wall. (Gardner, 2015; Clay, 2001)
Everyday Enlightenment
Chronic stress can result in a disconnected body, mind, and spirit. But these parts need to be in sync for true health and beauty. In the words of the Greek philosopher Plato, “The cure of the part should not be attempted without treatment of the whole. No attempt should be made to cure the body without the soul … This is the great error of our day, that physicians first separate the soul from the body.”
This is why, whenever my patients come into my office, I offer them much more than just skincare advice. I talk to them about their lives, too, and as a result, they tell me they leave feeling better about themselves. I’m a big believer that confidence and happiness in one’s life, along with strong self-esteem, contributes to great skin and a healthy body as well.
Here’s the key: it’s often the simplest gestures every day that can make us feel better, boost our mood, and calm us, reducing stress and boosting health, including the health of our skin. Call it everyday spiritual enlightenment. These are the simple reminders that I give to my patients and are good bits of advice for everyone.
Take your vacation days. You’ve earned them. Don’t wait for the right moment. How many of us wait for enough money or the exact right time to take a vacation or do something that we love? So many unused vacation days go to waste for so many Americans. Don’t wait. Schedule that time off or visit that place you’ve always wanted to see.
Re-frame your mindset. We all have an underlying pattern of thoughts that plays over and over in our minds. Become aware of them and direct them in a more positive way. If you ruminate on the last thing that bothered you, it can ruin your day, but stopping that repetitive pattern of thoughts in its tracks can help you to move on without added stress. This is something that becomes easier once you spend time in quiet thought and/or meditation. There will be things that happen that challenge you, but decide to keep a good attitude regardless of what happens. In fact, just trying to be happy has been shown to make you more positive overall. And as Lao Tzu has said, “If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.”
Change the lens through which you see the world and other people. Sometimes it’s easy to get stuck with thought patterns that are critical of others. But by being accepting of others’ differences, you can achieve inner peace. Similar to when the mind wanders off during meditation and you bring it back to your mantras, you have to keep bringing your mind back to acceptance of others when you want to be critical. And if there are toxic people in your life who are creating stress and anxiety and affecting your health and well-being, it may be time to walk away from them or at least limit the time you spend with them.
Pay attention to your inner GPS. Listen to how you feel (a.k.a. your gut response or intuition) and act on it. Your mind can lie but your feelings and emotions won’t. They are aligning you with your true path, your inner self. I liken the gut to our own inner GPS. The intuitive mind has often been called “a sacred gift” and the rational mind “a faithful servant.” But in our society today, we honor the servant and have forgotten the gift. Follow your dreams or inner thoughts and desires. Follow the calling you feel deep within you.
Take time out of every day to nourish your spiritual self. Set aside time every day to connect to your higher self with moments of silence. This could be while you’re outdoors walking, at your desk, or while meditating.
Don’t get stuck in a negativity rut. Life is easier if you accept the things that happen for what they are and move on. Try not to hold on to the negative (thoughts and criticisms) but let it pass by or through you. Letting go also helps free up that energy that you’re devoting to the negativity. Think of yourself standing in the middle of a shallow, moving river. You’re there to experience the river but not to try to stop it or control the flow. In the words of one anonymous quote, “Happiness can only exist in acceptance.” Enjoy life; accept what happens and the things that you cannot change. Don’t try to resist or fight it and you’ll find that you’re more peaceful and more resilient with anything life sends your way.
Realize that good often comes out of bad experiences. The things that we learn through our experiences, both good and bad, help to better us, make us grow, and even empower us. The next time you experience something that you feel is bad, look deeper into it to find the lesson or positive that came from it. It may take some time but eventually you’ll be able to find something positive that you can learn from and even use to help others.
Incorporate mindfulness into the everyday. Be in the moment while trying to block out thoughts of tomorrow or next week. Life is now. As Albert Einstein once said, “I never think of the future; it comes soon enough.”
Take thirty seconds every day to give thanks. Be thankful to be alive, for family, for friends, for health, for a good deed from a stranger. Taking a moment every day for thanks is critical to overall happiness.
Resent less. Forgiveness, as many researchers have found, is also good for your health, sleep quality, blood pressure, heart rate (and your heart health), anxiety levels, rates of depression, stress, and even cholesterol levels. Do your health a favor—add more peace to your life, and forgive. (Westervelt, 2012)
Don’t only focus on your outer purpose or goal (for instance, career or riches) but also on each step of the way and how you build your inner purpose and consciousness. Your journey in life has both an outer purpose (to reach a goal or accomplish something) and an inner purpose (this is the journey into yourself) and they’re intricately entwined and both essential to your overall health and beauty. In fact, having a purpose in life motivates a person to optimize their health, which means they’re more likely to take care of themselves.
Show kindness, compassion, and generosity to others. It’s contagious and just feels good. It may also be hardwired in our brains to be giving. Neuroscientists at the National Institutes of Health found that we have circuits in our brains that regulate empathy and the desire to help others. What’s more, the areas of the brain involved give off a pleasurable response, as well as producing brain chemicals like oxytocin, the hormone that promotes social bonding, and dopamine, the pleasure chemical, once we act on our altruistic impulses.
Believe that you have something to offer this world. It’s important to believe in yourself, love yourself, and fulfill your innermost dreams, no matter what other people say or who does or doesn’t believe in you. By following your heart you’re staying aligned with your higher self. Work toward the goals that you want to achieve. Doing so will boost happiness and health.
Where do you go from here? Consider something called ojas (pronounced oh-jus) from Ayurvedic medicine as your ultimate goal. Ayurveda is a holistic healing system that originated in India over five thousand years ago. Pure beauty, according to ayurveda, is clear, glowing skin, silky hair, happy eyes, youthfulness, and even a pleasant smell. This is the result of inner and outer happiness and health, and ayurveda sums it up as ojas. Ojas is referred to in ayurveda as the sap of life. True inner and outer beauty and health that radiates from a relaxed, peaceful state. This state of balance is a result of finding peace in your life, but it’s also a result of proper diet, exercise, and sleep. And that’s what I want to talk about in the coming chapters: the things you need, how to incorporate them into a busy life, and why it’s so important to this cultivation of the ojas, for longevity and true inner and outer beauty.