7

Take care, lest an adventure is now offered you, which, if accepted, will plunge you in deepest woe.

J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan

On Monday, 1 June, the rehearsal schedule for the ‘This Is It’ tour entered its seventh week. But, as had happened so often before, Michael Jackson was once again conspicuous by his absence. While the musicians and dancers did what they could without the main attraction, under the supervision of Kenny Ortega, Michael Jackson was back visiting his old friend, Beverly Hills dermatologist, Dr Arnold Klein. Here, Jackson received an injection of Restylane, accompanied by another 200mg of Demerol.

Despite the instructions laid down to Dr Murray by AEG Live that he was to ‘wean’ Jackson off Demerol, the singer’s visits to Dr Klein continued well into June. It is known from medical records and invoices, despite Klein insisting otherwise in an interview with Harvey Levin of TMZ on 6 November 2009,1 that Jackson visited Klein on 1, 3, 10, 16 and 22 June. By the time Jackson made his final visit to Dr Klein on 22 June, the singer had undergone 179 procedures and received 51 injections,2 including 21 of Demerol totalling 5,250mg of the drug, in a three-month period. When Dr Klein’s attorneys submitted an invoice for these procedures, which they sent to the creditors following Jackson’s death, the bill came to almost $50,000.3

By now, owing to the increasing scale of the production, the rehearsals had moved from Center Staging in Burbank to The Forum in Inglewood, California. Opened in December 1967 at a cost of $16 million,4 The Forum is a multi-purpose arena that Michael Jackson knew well. It was at The Forum, on 20 June 1970, that The Jackson 5 performed to a crowd that broke the venue’s attendance records, with 18,675 people paying to see the group. Jackson had also appeared there in 1981 when he joined his old friend and mentor, Diana Ross, onstage for a performance of her hit single ‘Upside Down’, recorded for her television special.

However, while the production had moved to The Forum, Jackson had yet to be seen at rehearsals there and, for AEG Live, this was causing major concerns, not least because they had discovered at the end of May that their initial outlay for the O2 concerts had more than tripled. Initially a $7.5 million outlay towards the production budget had been agreed by AEG Live, but now, when artist advances and the rent on Jackson’s house were taken into account, AEG Live were almost $29 million out of pocket. And the main attraction was nowhere to be seen.5 Somehow, AEG Live had to persuade and cajole Jackson to attend rehearsals as a matter of urgency.

One of the people who could help them was Dr Conrad Murray. He had still not agreed to, or signed, a contract for his services, yet he was devoting himself to his role as Jackson’s personal physician almost exclusively by the beginning of June. But while Jackson was visiting Dr Klein, Murray had no patient to treat, as Jackson would travel to see Klein without Murray. Still, Murray kept himself busy and, on 1 June 2009, he placed another order with SeaCoast Medical. Amongst the items ordered were an airway-kit (priced at $2.02) and an Ambu Bag, a manual handheld resuscitator used by medical professionals in preference to mouth-to-mouth ventilation in out-of-hospital settings when the patient’s breathing is insufficient or has ceased completely. Ideal, perhaps, to resuscitate a drug addict suffering cardiac arrest.

On 2 June, Kai Chase began her employment as Michael Jackson’s chef and nutritionist. Jackson had already been working with Lou Ferrigno as his personal trainer, and the implementation of a chef and nutritionist was seen as a vital cog in the efforts to get Jackson ready for the London concerts. However, within a few days of her employment, Chase became aware that tensions were running high throughout the Jackson camp.

Shortly after Chase was hired, a meeting was called at Carolwood mansion to discuss the problems of Jackson not attending rehearsals. Kenny Ortega was concerned that the singer wasn’t coming to enough rehearsals and, when he did, was taking it nonchalantly. Others within the production camp would suggest that when Jackson did actually turn up to rehearsals, he would often be ‘woozy’ and not as focused as he should be. But when Ortega put his concerns to Jackson, the singer told him that he wanted Kenny to build the house and then the pop star would come in and paint the front door.6

The meeting that took place at Carolwood was, supposedly, a heated one. It was heated enough, as Kai Chase testified, for a vase to be sent crashing to the ground and voices to be raised. According to Chase’s testimony in court, Jackson attended the meeting wearing a surgical mask and layers of clothing as he was complaining about feeling very hot, then extremely cold.7 These are classic withdrawal symptoms of an addict coming down from Demerol and it’s possibly no coincidence that Jackson visited Dr Klein twice in the first week of June and received two injections, totalling 400mg of Demerol.

The meeting was attended by Dr Murray, Frank Dileo, Michael Jackson and Randy Phillips. Kai Chase suggested that Jackson was an emotional wreck at the time; that he was scared, fearful and anxious about the meeting. She had to go in and out of the room refilling beverage glasses but didn’t overhear anything while she was briefly in the room but did, however, hear raised voices when she had left. On one occasion when she returned to fill the glasses she noticed a vase was lying broken on the floor and it wasn’t long after that Dr Murray stormed into the kitchen having escaped the meeting and exclaimed: ‘I can’t handle this shit!’ before leaving via the back door.8

On 3 June, Jackson visited Klein’s clinic once more after filming parts of ‘The Drill’ in 3D at Culver Studios,9 and perhaps as a result of the heated meeting, he soon began attending rehearsals more frequently. On 410, 5, 6, 8, 9, 1011 and 11 June, Jackson turned up to rehearsals at The Forum and Conrad Murray was also spotted accompanying him there for the first time.12

Jackson would generally attend during the evening as, at certain points during 1 to 11 June, the singer was also going to Culver Studios in Culver City. Here he was shooting The Dome Project which consisted of seven short film works and vignettes, either adaptations of earlier videos or totally new film elements: ‘Smooth Criminal’, ‘Thriller’, ‘Earth Song’, ‘They Don’t Care About Us’, ‘MJ Air’, ‘The Final Message’ and ‘The Way You Make Me Feel’ were the songs that had new film elements created for them, mostly in 3D.

Jackson’s reappearance at rehearsals was a relief to many. Amongst others, choreographer Travis Payne13 was aware of Jackson missing rehearsals at The Forum. He knew Jackson wasn’t showing up but never asked the singer why when he saw him at their private rehearsals. As far as Payne was concerned, Jackson was busy with other projects, such as an album and a book. Payne also thought Jackson seemed tired and recalled the singer saying to him that he had trouble sleeping. Furthermore, Payne noticed Jackson was losing weight throughout the rehearsal period. He asked the singer about it: ‘I’m getting down to my fighting weight,’ Jackson told him.14

The singer’s make-up artist, Karen Faye,15 was also aware Jackson was periodically missing rehearsals at The Forum, or turning up late, and Stacy Walker, the associate producer of the show, recalled in her testimony that: ‘I don’t remember how many times he came or not, it’s difficult. I remember being frustrated at the time, when we thought he would come and he didn’t.’ The general consensus amongst most of the production team was that Jackson was rehearsing on his own or with Travis Payne, working on other projects, or spending time with his children.

On 8 June, the eighth week of rehearsals began. Jackson was rehearsing at The Forum on Monday 8th to Thursday 11th, although he visited Dr Klein’s clinic on the 10th where he underwent acne surgery and Botox injections under the eyes, as well as receiving a 200mg injection of Demerol. It was on the 10th that choreographer Travis Payne recalled Jackson turning up at rehearsals wrapped in a blanket suggesting the singer was cold, once again a classic withdrawal symptom of Demerol.

That same day, while Jackson was at Klein’s Beverly Hills clinic, Dr Murray ordered more Propofol from Tim Lopez – this time 40 x 100ml bottles and 50 x 20ml bottles, some 5,000 additional millilitres of Propofol. This meant that, between 6 April and 10 June, Dr Murray had ordered 255 separate vials of Propofol, totalling some 15.5 litres of the drug, equivalent to 3.49 gallons. Just based on these orders alone, Murray had ordered in those 80 days enough to give Jackson 1,937mg of Propofol every single day.16

On 12 June, Jackson attended rehearsals at The Forum once more, but it didn’t go well and the next day, Saturday 13 June, Michael Jackson cancelled rehearsals on doctor’s orders.17 The following day, emails were exchanged between Kenny Ortega, Paul Gongaware, Randy Phillips, Travis Payne and Frank Dileo about Jackson’s lack of appearances at rehearsals.

Ortega sent an email to Paul Gongaware, which said:

Were you aware that MJ’s doctor didn’t permit him to attend rehearsal yesterday? Are Randy and Frank aware of this? Please have them stay on top of his health situation. Without invading MJ’s privacy it might be a good idea to talk to his doctor to make sure everything MJ requires is in place, who is responsible for MJ getting proper nourishment/vitamins/therapy everyday? Personally, I feel he should have a top nutritionist and Physical Therapist working with him on a regular basis. The demands on this guy are mentally and physically extraordinary! The show requirements exhaust our 20 year olds. Please don’t underestimate the need to stay on top of this.

Travis Payne, himself becoming increasingly concerned about Jackson’s well-being, suggested the singer should consider a regular massage, but Jackson flatly refused, as he thought it would be a violation of his personal space.

Karen Faye shared Payne’s concerns about Jackson. Having worked with Jackson as his make-up artist for over 25 years, she had noticed, as rehearsals progressed, the singer getting thinner and thinner each month, and she also noticed that he was beginning to repeat himself often, saying the same thing over and over again. Faye was aware that not all was right, a feeling confirmed during a visit to Paul Gongaware’s office where she heard Gongaware screaming down the phone to Michael Amir Williams because Michael Jackson had locked himself in his bathroom and wasn’t coming out.18

Faye was so concerned that Jackson was missing rehearsals that she went to people higher up the production chain to share her thoughts about the singer’s psychological well-being. She once even encountered Randy Phillips in the hallway of the rehearsal facility and told him how everybody was sad that Jackson was missing rehearsals. Phillips replied with the anecdote that he had had to get a drunken Jackson off the floor in London to ensure he turned up to the O2 press conference. This confirmed her fears for Jackson’s health and when she realised the singer was constantly cold to the touch, she communicated her concerns directly with Frank Dileo, by now Jackson’s manager again.

Making a phone call to Dileo when Michael Jackson was late to rehearsals once more, probably on 16 June,19 she expressed her concerns to the management but, as she later testified, she felt she wasn’t listened to by either Dileo or Ortega, and recalled that Kenny Ortega even told her to not listen to what Jackson was saying to her.

But, two days earlier, on 14 June, the consequences of Jackson’s frail health and the impact it was having on rehearsals with an opening night in London looming on the horizon had alerted those much higher up the production chain than Karen Faye. By 14 June, Paul Gongaware had almost certainly discussed the significance of everybody’s concerns with Frank Dileo. Gongaware had written an email to Randy Phillips saying that they had requested a face-to-face meeting with Dr Murray on Monday 15 June, at which they were going to remind Murray that it was AEG, not Jackson, who was paying his salary. Consequently, they wanted Murray to ‘… understand what is expected of him’.

On 15 June, the draft contract for Dr Murray’s services, which were still being performed in good faith, was close to being finalised. Kathy Jorrie, a lawyer from Los Angeles, was responsible for drafting the contract for services involving Conrad Murray and Michael Jackson. On 15 June she sent a draft agreement to Timm Woolley at AEG Live, part of which contained a clause that AEG Live were actively looking to secure housing for Dr Murray in London. The anticipation was that this contract, stipulating the provision of first-class airfare, housing in London and the provision of medical equipment as requested by Murray, would be signed by 3 July 2009. But, on the first draft agreement being sent to Murray the next day, 16 June, it was stated as commencing on 1 May 2009, some six weeks previously. This draft agreement was forwarded to Murray via email, and it obviously provided Dr Murray with a sense of security that the job appeared to be definitely going ahead as, later that day, he sent a letter to all his clients telling them that, ‘Because of a once in a lifetime opportunity, I had to make a most difficult decision to cease practice medicine indefinitely.’

It wasn’t the only business Murray was doing around that time. On 15 June, Murray placed another order with Tim Lopez, this time for 20 vials of Midazolam and 10 vials of Lorazepam while, at the same time, Dr Murray’s account representative in his Las Vegas clinic, Connie Ng, phoned Sally Hirschberg at SeaCoast Medical to talk about a potential order of urine bags, specifically asking for small urine collection bags.20 21

While Murray was confident enough in his position to announce to his clients that he was closing his clinics, the production team still had little confidence in the ability of Jackson to pull off the shows. Kenny Ortega wrote in an email that Jackson is ‘… not in great physical shape, I believe he is hurting, he has been slow at grabbing hold of the work’, and, following rehearsals on the 16th, the band’s musical director, Michael Bearden, sent an email to Kenny Ortega regarding Michael Jackson’s singing ability at that point of rehearsals. He wrote:

MJ is not in shape enough yet to sing this stuff live and dance at the same time. He can use the ballads to sing live and get his stamina back up. Once he’s healthy enough and has more strength, I have full confidence he can sing the majority of the show live. His voice sounds amazing right now, he needs to build it back up. I still need all big dance numbers to be in the system so we can concentrate on choreography.

It’s hardly surprising that both Ortega and Beardon felt this way around the 16 June rehearsal date as it’s the date when Karen Faye referred to Jackson as looking frightened but stoic following his latest visit to Dr Klein’s clinic for treatment, which involved yet another injection of Demerol.

There might have been another reason for Jackson’s increasing anxiety on 16 June: that day his representatives were in court on his behalf to face the charges filed against him by his ex-manager, Raymone Bain. Bain was formerly the singer’s publicist, but in 2003 became his spokesperson and later his personal manager. In 2006 she signed an agreement with Jackson, which appeared to guarantee her a 10 per cent finder’s fee on any agreement Jackson entered into as a result of Bain’s work. Jackson dismissed Bain in 2007, but she was now suing the singer for $44 million over allegations that Jackson ‘… elected not to honour the financial obligations of our contractual relationships.’22 This action, brought by Bain, was the latest in a long line of legal claims faced by Jackson as he prepared for his comeback23 – he had already been to court to prevent the contents of Neverland being sold; he had been sued by John Landis, the director of the ‘Thriller’ video, claiming Jackson had failed to pay Landis his 50 per cent cut of the net proceeds of the video; he had also been sued by former Playboy model Ola Ray who played Jackson’s girlfriend in the ‘Thriller’ video, seeking the unpaid royalties she felt she was owed for her role; and he had been sued for $7 million by the son of the King of Bahrain. As well as these, there were countless other lawsuits pending.24

With increasing stress impacting upon his life at so many levels, it is hardly surprising that Jackson was having trouble sleeping. He was in a financial mess, he was facing lawsuit after lawsuit and he had the tension of his impending comeback at the O2, upon which so much was riding. To help Jackson sleep, Dr Murray was giving the singer Propofol on a daily basis, in fact he had been doing so for six weeks and Jackson was, probably, by now dependent on the drug. Murray was also administering Jackson benzodiazepines and these drugs together meant the singer was often unable to communicate properly with his closest friends and wasn’t able to make sense as he continually repeated himself during conversations.

On 18 June, Michael Jackson, once again, failed to turn up at rehearsals. As a result, Randy Phillips, Kenny Ortega, Paul Gongaware and Frank Dileo travelled to Jackson’s home. This meeting was referred to as a ‘drug intervention’, the aim of which was to try to get the pop star to stop his dependence on drugs, and to focus and attend rehearsals. Dr Murray was invited to attend this meeting at AEG Live’s discretion.

While it was true that Jackson had stepped up his attendance at rehearsals, there was still the concern that he was distracted. In an email at the time, Randy Phillips said of the singer, ‘Getting him fully engaged is difficult and the most pressing matter as we are only 20 days out from the first show.’

AEG Live had already pushed back the opening date by five days, but it was inconceivable they could make yet another schedule change. Kenny Ortega had severe concerns that Jackson simply wouldn’t be ready in time, even with the new opening date. He would question Jackson by asking, ‘Are you going to show up? Are you really going to be here? You need to do this.’ As far as Ortega was concerned, they could placate Jackson no longer; it was time for ‘tough love’.25 Kenny Ortega wasn’t alone in realizing how critical it was that Jackson showed up for rehearsals. Everyone knew that Jackson was the fulcrum of the production and the whole show, and that naturally, everything revolved around him. Frank Dileo, however, had a different view of how crucial Jackson was to the rehearsal schedule. Dileo referred to Jackson as ‘… a gamer’ in his relationship to the rehearsal process: ‘He’s the quarterback. He’s the star of the team, and in practice, quarterbacks are easy going. But game day, he’s turning it on’, Dileo would say.26

Dileo’s reassurances didn’t hold much weight with the others in the production team and it was Ortega’s concerns that were shared by others. Even when Jackson did turn up at rehearsals his lacklustre performances worried many. The meeting on 18 June would see Jackson being read the riot act about failing to turn up at rehearsals, AEG demanding he put in maximum effort when he was there and, most importantly perhaps, the need for him to address his dependency on drugs. During the meeting Phillips and Gongaware urged Jackson to stop seeing Dr Klein. They were under no illusions that Klein was providing the singer with drugs that went some way to making the singer sleepy, lethargic and unable to rehearse properly. They demanded that Jackson only take the medications prescribed to him by Dr Murray, apparently totally unaware of the medications Murray was already prescribing him. The situation was extremely serious for all concerned, especially Jackson. According to a complaint filed with the Medical Board of California in 2010, Joe Jackson alleges that in this meeting Phillips and Gongaware also told Jackson that he turned up for rehearsals or AEG were going to ‘pull the plug’ on the show, his house and his doctor.27 This would naturally be followed by lawsuits and Jackson’s career would be over. Joining in, Ortega is supposed to have told Jackson that he had to get his ‘shit’ together before Phillips confirmed that Jackson must no longer see Klein, or take his drugs, because they had hired Murray to be Jackson’s doctor, not Klein.28 As far as they were concerned, Jackson had to do what Dr Murray instructed him to do. Then, turning on Murray, Phillips and Gongaware allegedly, according to a claim made in the Katherine Jackson v. AEG Live Complaint For Damages, told the doctor that he had to make sure Jackson got to rehearsals, and if he didn’t, the shows would be cancelled and Murray’s employment terminated.29

Many of the production crew present at rehearsals had little idea that Jackson was specifically under the influence of drugs. Travis Payne, for example, had never seen Jackson taking any prescription medication during rehearsals. He did observe the singer being under the influence of something, but had no idea what. Payne referred specifically, to instances when Jackson attended rehearsals after visiting Dr Klein when he noticed Jackson appearing ‘… you know, just a little loopy’.30 And even though Kenny Ortega was aware that Jackson hadn’t been turning up to rehearsals, he had no idea why and didn’t even suspect the singer was addicted to prescription medication. Ortega was told that Jackson’s no-shows were to do with scheduling and while it impacted on his rehearsal, he had no reason to doubt it, or to suspect anything else was going on.31

However, there was, by now, grave concern that if Jackson continued to miss any rehearsals then it was very possible that the production wasn’t going to be able to open in London in July. Following the meeting at Carolwood, during which Jackson had been read the ‘riot act’ by Phillips, Gongaware and Ortega, the singer made his way to that night’s rehearsals. He arrived at The Forum at 9:30pm that evening, but those who saw him arrive said he appeared visibly shaken. In fact, Jackson was furious. He was under no illusion that the choice before him was a stark one: he had to accept AEG Live’s demands or suffer catastrophic financial consequences. Karen Faye confirmed this in a text she sent to her boyfriend when she arrived home at 2:30am on the 19th. In the text, she referred to a meeting having taken place between Jackson and Randy Phillips and wrote:

Kenny told me AEG [Randy Phillips] is funding his entire life right now. His house, food, kids, school, everything. They told him they will ‘PULL THE PLUG IF HE DOESN’T GET HIS SHIT TOGETHER. IF HE DOESN’T DO THIS, HE LOSES EVERYTHING, PROBABLY EVEN HIS KIDS.’32

It was too early to know what effect the meeting might have had on the singer, but that night AEG Live moved forward with Conrad Murray’s contractual agreement. At 11:11pm Kathy Jorrie forwarded the written agreement to Conrad Murray. In it was a clause stating that AEG Live would have to provide CPR equipment and a nurse to Murray but otherwise, with the exception that the agreement required Michael Jackson’s signature, it was identical to the agreement Murray had held discussions about on 8 May 2009.33

Later that evening, when Jackson returned home from rehearsals, Dr Murray gave the singer a cocktail of Ativan (Lorazepam), Valium (Diazepam), Versed (Midazolam) and Propofol to enable Jackson to sleep. It was a ‘cocktail’ of drugs that Murray had been giving to Jackson nightly for six weeks. These drugs, known as powerful benzodiazepines, are central nervous depressants and constant use of them could result in an addiction to these multiple ‘downers’ or depressants. They are not normally lethal when used on their own, but when mixed with other central nervous depressants, such as alcohol for example or, worse, Propofol, they can be fatal.34

The following day, 19 June, Jackson appeared at The Forum for rehearsals, but it was quickly apparent to all concerned, especially Kenny Ortega, that the singer was unwell both physically and psychologically. Ortega recalled that Jackson ‘wasn’t right’ and that ‘… there was something going on that was deeply troubling me.’ Ortega also remembered Jackson, on that night, appearing ‘lost’. He would later testify that Jackson was, ‘Just lost and a little incoherent. Although we were conversing, and I did ask him questions and he did answer me, I did feel that he was not well … at all.’ Ortega was full of concern, he had never seen Jackson in such a state before. The thought now occurred to him that throughout the weeks of rehearsals, it was possible that Jackson might have been on drugs.35

The singer was upset, not coherent, and seemed drugged and disoriented to those around him. The production manager, John ‘Bugzee’ Hougdahl, sent an email to Randy Phillips saying, ‘I have watched him deteriorate in front of my eyes over the last eight weeks’, and Travis Payne recalled the singer being on edge that evening, as well as being cold, exhausted and paranoid. These observations seemed to back up Karen Faye’s comments that Jackson was ‘… cold like ice cubes’, and that he was shivering and shaking.

With no prospect of Jackson being able to rehearse, Kenny Ortega offered the stricken singer food, which Jackson accepted. Deeply concerned, Ortega fed him chicken soup, put a blanket around him, rubbed his feet and put a heater in the room next to him. The two of them talked and Jackson said to Ortega, ‘Can I sit with you tonight and watch rehearsal; I would really like that. Could Travis go on stage and perform and could I sit with you and watch rehearsal?’ Naturally, Ortega agreed as Jackson seemed so weak and so frail, and the two of them sat together for two hours watching the rehearsal performance before the singer left early, at Ortega’s suggestion.

At 2:04am on the morning of 20 June, Ortega sent an email to Randy Phillips from his office at The Forum, which said,

Randy, I will do whatever I can to be of help in this situation. If you need me to come to the house, just give me a call in the morning. My concern is now that we’ve brought the doctor into the fold and have played the tough love, now or never card, is that the artist may be unable to rise to the occasion due to real emotional stuff. He appeared quite weak and fatigued this evening. He had a terrible case of chills, was trembling, rambling, and obsessing. Everything in me says he should be psychologically evaluated. If we have any chance at all to get him back in the light, it’s going to take a strong therapist to help him through this as well as immediate physical nurturing. I was told by our choreographer that during the artist’s costume fitting with his designer tonight they noticed he’s lost more weight. As far as I can tell there is no one taking care responsibility (caring for) for him on a daily basis.36 Where was his assistant tonight? Tonight I was feeding him, wrapping him in blankets to warm his chills, massaging his feet to calm him and calling his doctor. There were four security guards outside his door, but no one offering him a cup of hot tea. Finally, it’s important for everyone to know, I believe that he really wants this. It would shatter him; break his heart if we pulled the plug. He’s terribly frightened it’s all going to go away. He asked me repeatedly tonight if I was going to leave him. He was practically begging for my confidence. It broke my heart. He was like a lost boy. There still may be a chance. He can rise to the occasion if we get him the help he needs. Sincerely, Kenny.37

With alarm bells ringing following the aborted rehearsal, Frank Dileo called Conrad Murray that evening and left a voicemail message in which he said,

Dr Murray, this is Frank Dileo, Michael’s manager, I’m the short guy with no hair. I’m sure you know Michael had an episode last night; he’s sick … I think you need to get a blood test on him today. We gotta see what he’s doing.38

That same day, Saturday 20 June, another meeting was called at Jackson’s Carolwood home. Attending the late-morning meeting was Jackson, Conrad Murray, Kenny Ortega and Randy Phillips. They had a frank and heated discussion about the singer’s health and stamina, particularly about what had happened the previous evening at rehearsals. During this discussion, Murray took a hostile tone with Ortega, who he saw as meddling in the doctor’s area of expertise. Dr Murray, who had jurisdiction to organise Jackson’s rehearsal schedule, was apparently upset that Ortega hadn’t allowed the singer to rehearse on the 19th and had, instead, sent Jackson home after the singer had sat out some of the rehearsals. This despite Ortega’s protestations at the state he had found Jackson in. One of the phrases Murray was supposed to have used towards Ortega was a stern, ‘I am the doctor, not you. You direct the show and leave Michael’s health to me’. Murray continued by confirming that Jackson was both physically and emotionally fine and more than capable of handling all of his responsibilities for the show.39

In response to Murray’s outburst, Ortega asked Jackson to back him up and explain to Murray that the decision not to rehearse was a joint decision that was agreed between the singer and Ortega. Michael Jackson informed Murray that this was, indeed, what had happened and told Ortega that he felt ‘… ready to take the reins’. He continued by telling Ortega that he shouldn’t be afraid, that he was perfectly capable of handling the responsibilities and that he wanted Ortega to stay by his side. He concluded by saying, ‘I’m fine Kenny, I promise you’, before they both embraced.40

In the documentary, Michael Jackson & The Doctor: A Fatal Friendship,41 a film made with the participation of Dr Murray as the actual trial took place, Murray recalls a meeting with Randy Phillips at Jackson’s home where Phillips took Murray aside, according to claims made in the documentary by Murray, to warn him of the dire financial outcome to Jackson if he failed to make the tour and the concerts were cancelled. Murray doesn’t state when this meeting took place, but, according to him, it was a crisis meeting, and it was at Carolwood. ‘That’s when I got the shock. Randy Phillips just asked that I step out the living room when the meeting had ended’, Murray claims. Once outside, Phillips spoke with Murray.

And this is him, you know, grinding his teeth. He [Jackson] does not have a fucking cent. A fucking cent. What’s this bullshit all about? Listen, this guy is next to Skid Row. He’s going to be homeless. The fucking Popsicles that his children are sucking on, look, those kids, what’s that all about? Nine security guards, why does he need that? I’m paying for that shit. I’m paying for the toilet paper he wipes his arse with. He doesn’t have a fucking cent. And if he don’t get this show done, he’s over. This is it. This is the last chance he has to earn any kind of money. He’s ruined. Financially he has nothing. Zero.

In the 2011 trial, Randy Phillips denied ever saying this to Murray, or having any such conversation.42

Following the meeting on 20 June, no rehearsals took place on the 21st and 22nd as the whole production relocated to the Staples Center for what was planned to be the final two weeks of rehearsals.

But the concern about Jackson’s well-being amongst the production crew continued to grow and, on 20 June, Karen Faye took it upon herself to send Frank Dileo some emails she had been receiving from concerned fans, worried about his state of health. These fans were often to be found waiting outside the rehearsal studios, hoping to get a fleeting glimpse of their idol as he was whisked in and out of the building, and perhaps be lucky enough to get an autograph, a photo with Jackson or even snatch a brief conversation with him. One of these fans had been invited onto the set of the 3D Thriller shoot at Culver Studios. Following this invitation, the fan had sent an email to Karen Faye describing how they had managed to meet Michael Jackson while at the location and were trying to persuade him to wear a jacket they had brought along for him as a gift. They managed to cajole the singer into trying the jacket on and, during this process, the fan managed to catch a glimpse of Jackson’s torso and his back. What the fan saw was shocking:

He took his jacket off and we saw something horrible, a skeleton and then we saw his back and we were still in shock. We don’t know if he is anorexic and stopped eating, or if it’s something more complicated than that. Well, in the [sic] case, if he has stopped eating, here is what I want to tell you. If you do nothing he will die. I know that it is humanly impossible for a human being to be a skeleton and dance for two hours straight and not be in danger.43

Karen Faye echoed the thoughts of the writer of the email when she forwarded it to Dileo. Faye wrote: ‘Frank, unfortunately she is right … he will make himself so sick he will die.’44 45

For nearly a quarter of a century Jackson was the centre of a world where those around him were only too eager to pander to him and to provide him with whatever he wanted, and painkillers were top of his list. The decades of Demerol abuse and reliance on other painkillers had caught up with him. Now, with a major series of shows to contend with, countless legal claims against him and the turmoil of his finances hanging like a shadow over him, Jackson was facing levels of stress few can comprehend. The medication that had brought him to this level was now his only escape. Jackson was caught in a maelstrom of confusion. Everyone around him, however well intentioned they might seem to the singer, had their own agenda. And a large part of that was to add to the confusion that was increasingly surrounding the singer. In doing so, they could potentially open up a direct avenue to Jackson and manoeuvre themselves into an indispensible position of influence, generally with their own interests at heart rather than those of Jackson. Combined with Jackson’s blurred reality from the effects of his addiction, perhaps it’s no wonder that Jackson didn’t know which way to turn, who to believe and who to turn to.

One of the few people around Jackson who had said ‘no’ to him was holistic nurse, Cherilyn Lee. Now, almost two months since the singer had abruptly dispensed with her services when she refused to get Propofol for him, Cherilyn Lee received a call out of the blue from Jackson’s security team on the night of 21 June. At the time, Lee herself was in hospital in Florida. She had been attending a seminar in St Petersburg but found herself completely overworked so admitted herself to hospital and ended up being hospitalised for two days. The call from the security guards on the night of the 21st found them asking if Lee could come to the house immediately. The call wasn’t from Jackson himself, but Lee could hear him in the background saying, ‘Tell her, please tell her that one side of my body is hot, one side of my body is cold’. These are classic symptoms of Demerol withdrawal and Jackson hadn’t seen Dr Klein, his main source of Demerol, for five days. Lee told them that there was no way she could come to the house, as she was now in Florida, but suggested that, on the basis of what she had heard, Jackson should be taken to hospital without delay.46

But Jackson wasn’t taken to hospital. Instead, the following day, 22 June, he was taken once more to Dr Klein’s clinic in Beverly Hills, his source of Demerol. There seemed to be nothing out of the ordinary about this visit, Jackson was treated with Restylane and had 100mg of Demerol, but the people present in Klein’s clinic that day had a weird feeling about Jackson’s visit. Many had the unnerving feeling they were seeing him for the last time. Both Klein and Jason Pfeiffer, Klein’s assistant, recalled the singer saying goodbye to everyone in the clinic, as though for the final time, and they were all creeped out about it.47

Pfeiffer had got to know Jackson well through his visits to the clinic and, on many occasions, had answered the phone to Jackson when the singer was ‘out of it’ and desperately seeking drugs, as Pfeiffer recalled in an interview in 2013.48 Pfeiffer said Jackson had a ‘death wish’ and that ‘… it was inevitable that something was going to go wrong’. He even recalled Jackson begging for Propofol, telling Pfeiffer: ‘I do it all the time to sleep’. Pfeiffer, like Klein, refused to give Jackson Propofol, but Pfeiffer was ready to admit that Jackson was hooked on Demerol during his visits to the clinic: ‘The main reason he came into the surgery so often, was to get a fix of Demerol during his procedures. He begged everyone to give it to him.’ Pfeiffer suggested Jackson was an addict who used cosmetic procedures as an opportunity to get a fix of Demerol, even inventing and faking medical issues in order to receive the drug. Often, Jackson would plead with the clinic to give him four times the regular amount of Demerol. ‘Michael felt he was immune to normal volumes,’ said Pfeiffer, ‘and begged for extra quantities.’49

Karen Faye felt that something was going on and, on 22 June, sent another email to Frank Dileo asking him to intervene as Jackson was suffering from ‘… serious stuff physically and mentally and … concerts not worth jeopardizing his life for.’ Frank Dileo failed to respond to her emailed concerns.50 Others around Jackson, like Faye, were unnerved about the state of the singer and were worried something terrible might happen. Jackson’s son, Prince, recalled seeing his father being left in tears after talks with Randy Phillips just days before he died. ‘After he got off the phone, he would cry. He’d say, “They’re going to kill me, they’re going to kill me.”’51 And in the final week of rehearsals Jackson purportedly asked the producers of the show, ‘You aren’t going to kill the artist are you?’52

On 23 June, with Jackson out of Klein’s clinic, rehearsals resumed. By now the production was installed in The Staples Center, a 950,000sq ft multi-purpose arena in downtown Los Angeles. By all accounts, this was one of the most successful rehearsals with Jackson appearing strong and optimistic, looking towards the future and keen to get the tour off the ground and head to London.53 He was full of energy, full of a desire to work and full of enthusiasm. Stacy Walker remembers them doing half the show on this rehearsal night with Jackson’s performances being ‘… great in the numbers.’54 In fact, Walker was so excited after that rehearsal that she called her mother to tell her to get tickets for the opening night as soon as possible. Ortega would later refer to the singer as being ‘… a different Michael’. By this point in rehearsals, however, Jackson was using a teleprompter, a piece of equipment on stage, out of view of the audience, which displayed song lyrics. Jackson had never used a teleprompter before in any of his performances, but now felt he needed one to help him remember the song lyrics, even for the songs he had sung thousands of time before.

While the rehearsal was taking place, Dr Murray was overseeing Jackson’s care. At 5:33pm, Connie Ng sent an email to Murray under the subject of ‘Omar Arnold – Progress Notes’. A minute later, Ng sent another email to Murray with the subject of ‘Omar Arnold – 2D – Echo’. This contained a report referring to an echocardiograph on 17 January 2007. Ng sent another email at 5:38pm under the subject heading of ‘Omar Arnold Medication Log’. These emails proved, beyond doubt, that Murray was indeed treating Jackson55 as early as 2007.

As well as these emails, Dr Murray also received a revised employment agreement from Kathy Jorrie, on behalf of AEG Live. There were minor changes to the agreement following discussions that had been ongoing, most notably the fact that Murray would not be paid until the contract was signed by both Murray and Michael Jackson.

Conrad Murray finally signed the agreement the following day, 24 June 2009, and faxed it to AEG Live. That same day, Michael Jackson turned up three hours late to rehearsals at The Staples Center. There were only eight more rehearsals in Los Angeles before the whole production would be shipped to London for two weeks of full dress and technical rehearsals. But, according to production manager, John ‘Bugzee’ Hougdahl, ‘The company is rehearsing right now, but the doubt is pervasive.’56

Despite Jackson turning up late this was, like the day before, a successful run-through with Jackson fully participating not only in rehearsals, but also other areas of production. ‘Earth Song’ was the final song to be rehearsed that night, and those who witnessed Jackson’s performance of this composition had goose bumps when it finished. Even Randy Phillips said, ‘I had never seen such exultation in the cast and crew’.

Around midnight, as he was about to leave, Jackson was particularly excited as the next day they were due to rehearse an illusion that was going to be a major part of the tour, a tour that Jackson had by now intimated to Ortega might go worldwide and eventually end up in the USA. Jackson loved magic and illusions, and often used them within his shows. This illusion planned for 25 June would see Jackson standing on a bed with silk flames partly obscuring him. When the silk flames came down Jackson would vanish before suddenly rising up on a cherry picker and flying out over the audience. As he left, Ortega recalled the singer was feeling great. ‘He looked at me and he asked me if I was happy and I said I was happy. I asked him if he was happy and he said he was very happy’, Ortega recalled.

Just before he left the Staples Center, Jackson asked Ortega to thank everybody and to tell them that he loved them – the dancers, the singers, the band, and the crew. Ortega told Jackson that he would make sure everything was prepared for the illusion rehearsal the next day and told him that he loved him. Jackson returned the compliment, saying he loved Ortega more, then they hugged, and Michael Jackson left the Staples Center.

As he left the arena around 12:30am, Jackson turned to Ortega and said, with a big smile on his face, ‘I’ll see you tomorrow’.

*   *   *

But Michael Jackson never returned.