When you were pregnant and staring down the barrel of months and months off work, you might have dreamed about all the things you’d get done in that time.
You’d finally learn a new language.
You’d learn the piano like you’ve always wanted to.
You’d tear through all those books on the shelf, then you’d organise that cupboard. You’d scrapbook every milestone in the baby book. It’d be such a time of learning and growth for you and your new baby.
Your baby, of course, would come along for the ride. She’d play on the floor during your piano lessons. You’d read to her in Spanish because then she’d learn it too. She’d be such a hit at your French cookery classes and the other students would fight to cuddle her. Ahh, the delicious promise of all That. Free. Time.
I’m sorry, but it might not quite work out that way. In fact, it’s pretty easy to spend the twelve whole months of maternity leave trying to start something and twelve whole months never finishing anything.
It’s not that babies create so much havoc you can’t breathe; it’s simply a matter of priorities. During this first year, your priorities will shift so much you’ll laugh at the things you thought you’d want to do.
Babies do take up a lot of your time. Realistically, your days will be filled with playing with the baby, cleaning the baby, feeding the baby, trying to get the baby dressed and out of the front door, getting the baby to sleep and taking photos of the baby. That doesn’t sound like much, but it’ll fill every spare minute of your day.
You might, if you’re lucky, get about two hours in the day free while the baby naps. Two hours, you say? Plenty of time to learn how to crochet!
Absolutely—just as soon as you tidy up all the toys, clean the kitchen and the food-covered floor, run a load of laundry, eat some lunch and sit down for four minutes with your eyes closed so you can catch up on the six hours of sleep you didn’t get last night.
And then she wakes from her nap.
Having goals is great. Have lots of goals. But don’t be hard on yourself if you don’t manage to write your first book during your maternity leave. Keeping a baby fed, entertained, clean and happy is a full-time job, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Taking five minutes in the day to sit and relax isn’t a crime either. If it makes you feel recharged and re-energised, then that’s what you need to do to keep going. And if you do pick up a few words of Spanish, then well bloody done, you.