One of the queries I get most often from stressed-out moms is, “What do I offer my picky eater for lunch?” I explore this topic in detail in my first cookbook, but let’s examine it here for a moment.
Instead of labeling our kids with terms like “difficult” or “stubborn” or “picky” or looking at the associated behaviors as a negative, try instead to spin it into a positive. What are the foods your children enjoy most? Start by making a list of their absolute favorites, then include the foods you think they might enjoy and expand from there. Often when you focus on the positive and take the pressure off by not labeling a child “picky,” kids will start feeling good about their choices rather than chastised for their perceived failings.
I’ve also seen selective eaters become much more open-minded when they’re away from their parents. You’ll likely be surprised to discover what things your kid will eat when you’re not around. I always say that I’m blessed with two great eaters, but plenty of times I’ve taken a chance and put a certain food in my kids’ lunch box that I was sure would come home untouched, only to find zero trace of it at the end of the day. Maybe it’s because not having a parent there removes the pressure, or it’s the fact that your kid is hungry and has no other choices, or that your child is around friends who are enjoying their lunches and is simply swept up in the moment—but I’ve found that very often, even the “pickiest” of kids can change her tune.
Of course some kids present bigger challenges than others. The reasons can vary greatly, but I don’t believe that any of us should give up hope.
Include your child when shopping for what you’ll make him for lunch. Offer a few nutritious choices and allow your child to choose from them. Feel free to tell your child that you’re not going to buy fried potato chips, but he can choose from baked potato, pita, or bagel chips. A little choice can go a long way.
Remember that it can take up to ten times for children to enjoy a new food or vegetable, so if your child doesn’t eat something new on the first or second try, have patience and don’t give up on offering it. You could otherwise be missing out on the discovery of a new favorite!
Seasonings can go a long way with so-called picky eaters. Let your child jazz up her own lunch with something tasty that makes her feel like she helped prepare her meal. Top steamed vegetables with Bragg’s Liquid Aminos, or sprinkle toasted sesame seeds on top for visual appeal and an added crunchy texture.
Frequently I’ll offer my kids a second attempt at their untouched lunch after school. I fully understand the importance of schedule and routine for parents and having kids eat only at set mealtimes, but it’s important to allow growing bodies and minds a chance at refueling with nutritious foods on their own clock. As most parents know, little ones often don’t offer a lot of explanation about what happens at school during the day, so pay attention to other factors that might make kids “picky.” Not eating their lunch may be less about disliking the new thing you made than it is the fact that they were having a bad day or were just not hungry at lunchtime because they needed to use the bathroom, were distracted by friends, weren’t feeling well, and so on.
Even though it can be tough on parents, remember that kids self-regulate with food and generally get the nutrients they need. You may be surprised to learn that kids are able to manage their bodies much better than adults do. As long as you’re providing them with balanced meals every day, you’re doing your job and your kids will be fine.
Most important, keep trying and don’t give up. If you hate the fact that your child eats chips, but you keep buying them and eat them yourself, it’s not really your kid’s fault if that’s what he wants to eat. I would probably want chips instead of green beans too if they were constantly available to me. Parents need to avoid buying too many processed foods and model good eating habits for their kids. Offering nutritious food, making and eating meals together, and educating your little ones are the best tools for raising a great lifelong eater, leading to good mealtime habits both at home and school for life!
One of the greatest joys about the weelicious website is the dialogue I’m able to have with my readers. Whether they’re new moms, veteran moms, or moms-to-be, I cherish and am always inspired by these women’s amazing stories, questions, and above all, feedback. I’ve included some of their comments alongside many of the recipes throughout the book. To me, their stories reflect what kindred spirits we moms are and read like words of encouragement, something we can always use in the kitchen!