BASICALLY CARBLESS (NOT THAT WE CARE) CAULIFLOWER CRUST PIZZA
GLM
I don’t believe in ruling out any foods. In my experience, as soon as you do that you’re bound to fantasize of nothing but forbidden delicacies all day long, until you inevitably crack and eat whatever you swore you wouldn’t on the kitchen floor at three o’clock in the morning. Rather, I like to make a practice of eating healthfully most of the time so that when I’m invited to a nine-course pasta dinner, a doughnut shop opening, or a cake tasting, I can freely partake without any guilt. An 85 percent virtuous / 15 percent decadent rule tends to keep me relatively sane.
I’ve found the key to staving off cravings when it’s not quite time to indulge in that 15 percent is to replicate white, starchy, not-so-good-for-you foods with the king of vegetables, cauliflower.
It starts with about half a cauliflower, cut into florets (but if you live near a Trader Joe’s that stocks cauliflower rice, you can use that). Through the magic of baking (plus some eggs, Parmesan, and salt), I turn it into a pizza crust that, while it doesn’t taste exactly like regular pizza crust, comes pretty damn close.
I like to top this pizza very simply, since the crust is somewhat delicate—usually just sauce, cheese, and some greens or another vegetable, but I’ve made it with pepperoni, sausage, and fried eggs, all with good results.
SERVES 2
INGREDIENTS
½ large cauliflower, cut into florets
2 eggs, lightly beaten
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, divided
½ cup grated Parmesan, plus more for topping the pizza
Pinch of salt
¼ cup sauce of your choice (tomato, pesto, romesco, etc.)
1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
1–2 toppings of choice (we love sliced bell pepper, pepperoni, mushrooms, olives, and caramelized onions)
Fresh herbs—we like sliced basil and chopped parsley (optional)
Red chili flakes (optional)
DIRECTIONS
• Preheat the oven to 400°F.
• Place the cauliflower florets in a food processor and puree until the mixture resembles ricotta cheese and each grain is about the size of a piece of couscous.
TIP: If you can’t seem to get the right consistency, or if a few whole florets remain after pureeing, try adding enough water to cover (usually about 2 cups) and puree as if you are making soup. When all the cauliflower has been completely processed, strain it in a fine-mesh strainer.
• Scrape the cauliflower into a microwave-safe bowl and microwave it on high for 5 minutes.
• Carefully scrape the microwaved cauliflower puree onto a clean dish towel.
• Very carefully (using a second towel if necessary to protect your hands) squeeze out as much liquid as possible. Get it as dry as you can.
• In a mixing bowl, combine the cauliflower, the eggs, 1 tablespoon of the olive oil, the Parmesan, and the salt. Mix together to make a thick batter.
• Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.
• Scrape the batter into the center of the parchment. Gather the batter into a ball shape.
• Wet your hands and carefully pat the batter into a circle, making it as thin as possible.
• Drizzle the cauliflower circle with the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil and use your hand or a pastry brush to spread it all over the circle.
• Bake for 30 minutes, or until the crust is nicely browned and a little crisp.
• Remove the crust from the oven, but leave the oven on.
• Place a piece of parchment paper over the top of the cooked crust.
• Carefully flip the whole thing so the bottom is facing up.
• Remove the top layer of parchment (what was previously the bottom layer).
• Top your pizza with sauce, cheese, and anything else you like. (I encourage you to go light on the toppings—the crust is sturdy but not as sturdy as conventional pizza crust.)
• Bake for 20 to 22 minutes more, until the cheese is browned and bubbly.
• Slice and serve, topping with fresh herbs and red chili flakes if desired.