A DATE WITH THE DEVIL(’S) FOOD CAKE WITH EASY CHOCOLATE FROSTING
GLM & MPB
We love online dating (Gabi met Evan on OkCupid), but we also know that it can be pretty damn weird. Before online dating, if you had agreed to go out with someone, you’d likely have met them before. You’d smelled their pheromones and deemed them human and acceptable to have drinks with, or maybe you’d been set up by a respectableish third party. Today we swipe right and leave the house hoping for decent conversation and a touch of good chem. A first date is really just an interview to see if you can get slightly drunk and make out with someone, right? We think that’s a good way of looking at it.
A few months before she met Evan, Gabi showed up to a date with a guy who was literally a foot shorter than he purported to be. There’s a ceiling for dating-profile lying, and that ceiling is shorter than a foot. (It’s probably a four-inch ceiling.)
Miranda, meanwhile, arrived to meet a guy only to find out he had double-booked her. She went up to him and said, “Hi, are you John?” He looked at her on his right and another girl on his left and literally sprinted out of the bar. She was left to have drinks with a girl who was basically her twin, but, like, a hot yoga instructor version of her. (She did, however, end up getting a free breathwork class out of the thing. It’s not for her.)
Look, even online dating success stories are usually preceded by a lot of terrible online dating stories. But even on those awful nights when the guy is lame, the drinks are weak, and the conversation is awkward, you deserve a rich, chocolaty treat. You showered. You put on a dress. You wasted some witty well-crafted texts on an idiot. You took a chance, right? No risk, no reward. No devil, no devil’s food cake.
SERVES 8 TO 10
INGREDIENTS
For the cakes
¾ cup unsweetened cocoa powder (not hot cocoa mix)
½ cup boiling water
3 cups all-purpose flour or cake flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon salt
3 sticks unsalted butter (1½ cups), at room temperature, plus more for pans
2¼ cups granulated sugar
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
4 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 cup milk
For the Easy Chocolate Frosting
1 stick unsalted butter (½ cup), at room temperature
6 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
½ cup whole milk
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
4 cups powdered sugar
NOTE: You could instead use a couple of cans of prepared chocolate frosting. You’ll need about 6 cups.
DIRECTIONS
Make the cakes
• Sift the cocoa powder into a medium bowl, then whisk in the boiling water. Set aside to cool.
• Arrange two racks in the center of the oven and preheat to 350°F.
• Butter three 8 × 2-inch round cake pans and line their bottoms with parchment.
• In a large bowl, sift together the flour, baking soda, and salt.
• In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, beat the butter at low speed until light and fluffy.
• Gradually beat in the granulated sugar, 3 to 4 minutes, scraping down the sides twice.
• Beat in the vanilla extract.
• Pour in the eggs a little at a time, beating between each addition until the batter is no longer slick, scraping down the sides twice.
• Whisk the milk into the cooled cocoa mixture.
• With the mixer on low speed, alternately add the flour and cocoa mixtures to the batter, a little of each at a time, starting and ending with the flour mixture.
• Divide the batter evenly among the three prepared pans.
• Bake for 35 to 45 minutes, rotating the pans once or twice for even baking, until a toothpick or cake tester inserted in the center of each pan comes out clean.
• Transfer cakes to wire racks and let cool for 15 minutes.
• Gently remove the cakes from their pans, and let cool completely.
Make the Easy Chocolate Frosting
• Melt the butter in a large microwave-safe bowl in the microwave. Whisk in the cocoa powder.
• Add the milk and vanilla extract and whisk until frothy. Make sure that the cocoa powder has completely dissolved.
• In a stand mixer with a beater attachment, with a hand mixer, or by hand with a whisk (and a strong arm!), work the powdered sugar into the liquid a little at a time until fully incorporated.
• The frosting should be thick but spreadable. If it is runny, add more powdered sugar; if too stiff, work in a teaspoon of milk.
• Use immediately, or let cool in the fridge, then whip again until fluffy.
NOTE: This frosting will keep for several days in the fridge, but make sure it’s tightly covered. It will dry out and form a thin crust if exposed to air.
Assemble the cake
• Remove the parchment from the bottoms of the cakes.
• Select the prettiest layer; use this one for the top of the cake.
• Place one cake layer on a serving platter. Spread 1½ cups of the frosting over the top.
• Add the second cake layer, and spread with another 1½ cups of frosting on top.
• Top with the third cake layer. Cover the top and sides of the cake with the remaining 3 cups of frosting. Slice and serve.
• If you’re crying, the tears will only make the cake more moist. (But don’t cry, you deserve better.)