I’M CHILL, BUT WE’RE OBVIOUSLY EXCLUSIVE? FISH TACOS WITH MANGO-AVOCADO SALSA
MPB
Trying to be the “cool girl” is exhausting.
I once waited five months to have “the talk” with a guy I was seeing. I wanted to seem like the kind of girl who just didn’t give a fuck, who had eighty-seven other people texting her for dates, but also I was truly afraid he would just say he didn’t want more and leave me in the dust. He’d want to remain free as a bird that couldn’t commit to his flock. Frankly, I wasn’t sure what I wanted either, so when I set out to “have the talk,” I was very blasé about the whole thing.
One night I invited him over for a fancy dinner and planned to will him into realizing we were a couple. He’d buy the booze. I’d make a roast and wear an apron. We’d feel feelings. Our eyes would lock in an intense moment and I would say something romantic along the lines of, “So I’m, like, your girlfriend, right? Because my sister is getting married and I’d like to have a date.”
“Yes,” he would respond. “I am completely mad for you and how you could think otherwise for even one second is beyond me. Also, I love weddings.”
This didn’t happen.
Instead I got very frustrated with an impossible meal. My roast was burnt and my heart was racing. We got totally bombed because there was no food, had sex, showered, and showed up late to my best friend’s birthday party. At the party, drunker, I couldn’t control myself. I pushed him into a room and said, “What the hell are we doing?” He asked why I was bringing it up now, at a party. I acknowledged my immaturity and added that I just couldn’t take it anymore. He commended me on waiting so long. He was impressed! That said, he wouldn’t call me his girlfriend quite yet. He did tell me that his parents knew my name, and that was enough for me, at least in that moment.
The first lesson is regarding food. If you’re trying to be blasé about the whole thing, you can set the tone with the food. Tacos are chill. Surfers eat them on the beach and stuff. Why make an impossible roast to try to impress someone you’re already dating?
The second lesson here is: If you’re not that chill, don’t pretend to be. Your feelings are precious and you should take note of them, I hear. They’re probably going to come out sooner or later, and if they don’t, they will fester and make you feel even worse (I hear this too). There are no chill girls, only chill flannel shirts. You should know what you want and go after it. Gabi knows how to do that. Gabi is badass in that way. That’s why she makes Steak Your Claim Steak, and I make casual coy tacos. Let’s say her steak at right is for when you’re sure, and you want an answer; these tacos are for when you’re a little more wishy-washy and want things to work themselves out naturally, or for when you’re a scared baby.
MAKES 6 TACOS
INGREDIENTS
2 roma tomatoes, diced
1 avocado, diced
1 mango, diced
½ red onion, diced
½ jalapeño, seeded and finely diced
1 small bunch cilantro, chopped
Juice of ½ lime
Salt
½ cup IPA beer (we like Lagunitas or Speakeasy’s Big Daddy)
⅔ cup all-purpose flour, plus more for dusting fish
½ pound red snapper fillets (2–3 small fillets)
Vegetable oil, for frying
6 corn tortillas
NOTE: Beer-battered fish tacos are a classic. They’re typically made with a light beer, such as Corona, but we’re much bigger fans of darker, hoppier IPAs.
DIRECTIONS
• In a mixing bowl, combine the tomato, avocado, mango, onion, jalapeño, cilantro, lime juice, and a pinch of salt to make a salsa. Stir and set aside.
• Combine the beer, flour, and a pinch of salt in a bowl. Whisk until a smooth batter is achieved. Set aside.
• Cut the snapper fillets into 3-inch pieces, removing small bones if possible.
• Pour a little flour onto a plate. Lightly dredge the fish pieces in the flour, shaking off the excess. Set aside.
• Fill a deep skillet with vegetable oil to a depth of 1 inch. Heat the oil over high heat. Move the floured fish and the batter near the stove.
• Dip the floured fish pieces into the batter, ensuring each piece is fully coated and excess drips off.
• Fry the fish pieces, a few at a time, until golden brown and crisp on one side. Use metal tongs or a metal spatula to flip them and cook on the other side.
• Remove the fish pieces carefully and drain on paper towels.
• To assemble the tacos, top each corn tortilla with a few pieces of fish and a couple of large spoonfuls of the salsa. Serve immediately.