EASIEST ROAST CHICKEN TO TRICK SOMEONE INTO FALLING IN LOVE WITH YOU

GLM

Cooking for someone you’re hoping to hop into bed with, or at least make out with on the couch, or do something in between with, can be daunting. Between choosing what to cook and getting it done and the kitchen cleaned up before your date arrives (or, alternately, cooking it while he or she sips wine and flirts with you while you try to keep from burning the side dish), it can be a lot to manage.

This recipe is your solution. Unless your paramour is a vegetarian, this is the absolute best thing you can make to inspire your lover to fall madly in love with you. Just about every meat-eater likes chicken, and this is chicken in its most glorious form: roasted whole, until the skin turns crispy, the meat gets juicy, and your house smells homey, in a way that will make your paramour feel hungry and excited, yet relaxed. In other words: primed for love.

Do your shopping early to avoid last-minute dinner jitters. If it’s a weekday, perhaps go to the supermarket before work. Then when you get home, you’ll already feel like something is done. You can have more time to shower and send your friends selfies of your perfect “I’m staying in, but I’m still very adorable” outfit.

Get the chicken prepped and into the oven before homeboy (or homegirl) arrives, roast some sweet potatoes or whip up some risotto (here), and throw together a simple green salad. Open the wine so it has a chance to breathe, and wipe down the counters. Then get ready for your date. Design a lighting scheme, spray your house with Febreze, etc.

Best-case scenario: Your honey takes one bite of a succulent piece of chicken, gazes into your eyes, and declares his or her undying affection. Worst-case scenario: It doesn’t work out, and your date takes off, leaving you with the best chicken of your life. Either way, you’re in good company.

SERVES 4

INGREDIENTS

1 whole (4-to 5-pound) roasting chicken, giblets removed

½ cup extra-virgin olive oil

12 cloves garlic, chopped

Leaves from 2 sprigs fresh rosemary

1 lemon, zested and thinly sliced

2 teaspoons salt

2 teaspoons pepper

DIRECTIONS

• Preheat the oven to 425°F.

• Rinse the chicken under cool running water and pat dry with paper towels. Place it in a large (at least 9 × 13-inch) casserole pan or a cast iron pan (this is my preferred pan for roasting a chicken).

• In a small bowl, whisk together the olive oil, garlic, rosemary, lemon zest, salt, and pepper. (You can also leave the garlic cloves whole and blend these ingredients together in a food processor or blender.)

• Pour a bit of the oil-garlic mixture into the cupped palm of your hand and rub it over the skin of the chicken.

• Gently slide your hands between the skin and the flesh of the chicken and rub some of the oil mixture beneath the skin. Pour a bit more oil into your hands and rub the cavity of the chicken with it. Continue until the whole chicken is covered with the garlic-oil mixture.

• Place a few slices of lemon between the skin and the flesh. Stuff the rest of the slices into the cavity. Arrange the chicken breast-side up in the pan.

• Cover the pan tightly with aluminum foil.

• Bake covered for 30 minutes.

• Remove the foil and bake uncovered for another 25 to 30 minutes, or until the skin is golden brown and the juices run clear (stick a knife into the thigh to check this).

• Cut into pieces and serve hot.

• Watch as your dinner guest slowly melts before your eyes.