Dog Mama

Hanging in my wardrobe is a tee that says “Dog Hair, Don’t Care.” But do you know what? As a self-confessed neat freak, I do actually care. I care a lot.

In fact, dog hair is up there in being one of the peeviest of pet peeves of pet owners. Even owners of so-called non-shedding breeds are not entirely immune. Dog fur and dander gets on your clothes, on your furniture, in your car, and generally will blow around like tumbleweeds across your living room if you don’t get control of it.

The reality is, dogs come with lots of hair and most of that ends up throughout your home. So that pretty much leaves you with two choices:

A) Start a business making weird sculptures out of pet hair.

B) Follow my three-step program to get pet-hair free. (I’ll even throw in a free set of steak knives!*)

The number one thing you can do to prevent pet hair building up in your home is to regularly groom your dog. That means regular brushing and monthly grooming (see my tips for Grooming Like a Boss on page 77).

If you’ve ever seen how much hair can come out of just one full body brush, you’ll understand why your home is currently covered in fur. The same goes for regular bathing—whether you wash your dog at home or take her to a professional.

For an interesting experiment—next time your dog gets a full wash and groom, give your home a deep clean. In the days that follow you’ll notice minimal dog hair and dander on your floors, clothes, and furniture—simply because so much of the dead hair has been washed away! Now don’t waste this glorious time. Continue to brush daily.

Now, while you’ve reduced the amount of dog hair your pup is shedding, I’d be kidding you if I said that was all you needed to do. The second step involves cleaning the dog hair that your pooch does shed—with the absolute minimum amount of time and effort. Because I don’t know about you, but I’d prefer to be lying on my couch watching Nailed It rather than picking dog hair off it.

The number one tool in your dog hair arsenal is the best pet hair vacuum you can afford. Sure, there are a whole host of “quick fix” brooms, “amazing” fabric sweepers, and “As Seen on TV” pet hair mitts—but they all involve an investment of time and often only clean one element, such as hardwood floors, or fabric sofas.

Pro Tip!

A good blow dry at the groomers can get rid of a lot of excess dead hair—especially for dogs with undercoats.

A quality vacuum and a well-set-up home (see my tips in Setting Up the Perfect Pet-Friendly Home on page 17) is all you need. Depending on the size of your apartment or house I would suggest a choosing one or a combination of the below four types of vacuums to keep pet hair under control:

Cordless Stick Vacuum: Cordless vacuums have come such a long way in the last few years that for small spaces, they can be the only vacuum cleaner you need. Current cordless pet hair vacuums are designed to eliminate pet hair and allergens throughout your home—and they don’t have the hassle of dragging round a heavy turbine and tangled cord! Current stick vacuums are lightweight and have long battery lives, meaning you can often clean your whole living space in one go. These babies are great for quick daily cleans and keeping pet hair under control as you go with minimal fuss.

2-in-1 Vac & Steam Cleaners: Just like the cordless vacuum, these cleaners allow you to clean thoroughly in one go through homes with hard floor surfaces, vacuuming and mopping as you go. I know—dog hair and paw prints wiped out in one fell swoop. As magical as they sound, it’s important to choose your unit wisely. Opt for cleaners that can move quickly over floors (some versions take forever and save you literally no time whatsoever) and leave little or no wet residue. For dog mamas with mostly hard floors these are a great option.

Barrel Pet Hair Vacuum: These suckers are literally designed to suck up animal hair without getting fur stuck in the turbine, and have dedicated air filtration systems to help eliminate dust and dander in the air (a saver for people who suffer from pet allergies!). Coming with an array of cleaning attachments for floor and furniture surfaces, this type of vacuum will help you clean literally every nook and cranny. Suitable for larger spaces, this type of vacuum comes out for a big weekly clean then returns to the cupboard. Easy peasy.

Robotic Pet Vacuum: Now these are a game changer. Why spend your life vacuuming up pet hair when the vacuum can do all the hard work? Robotic vacuums have come a long way since they first hit the market, and while a financial investment, they pay it back in spades. Simply program your vacuum for a scheduled cleanup and return home to a pet-hair-free house.

Depending on your lifestyle, you may find it easier to do one big clean every weekend, quick daily hair patrols to prevent any buildup, or set your robotic vacuum and never look back.

With less hair coming from your dog (due to your amazing brushing and grooming efforts!) you now have a solid base from which to remove any excess pet hair that builds up in your home.

Pro Tip!

To stop shedding at the source, invest in a Dyson groom tool. This adjustable slicker brush attaches to your vacuum hose and removes dead hair directly from your dog. Simply brush, and the collected hair is sucked into your vacuum. It takes a bit of practice for your dog to get used to it, but once you get the hang of it, the Dyson groom tool cuts your grooming and cleaning time in half!

The last piece of the pet hair puzzle is all about those pesky flyaways that seem to turn up in the most random of places. I mean, I once found a dog hair inside a dry cleaning bag. Yes, it was my dog’s hair, and yes, that dry cleaning bag was fresh straight from the cleaners. I swear dog hair has magical powers to get anywhere and everywhere.

To help you stay pet-hair free, here’s what you need to eliminate those final furry hairs:

Vinegar: Adding half a cup of white distilled vinegar to your rinse cycle helps prevent pet hair from clinging to clothes and sheets.

Lint Rollers: Unless you want to spend your days picking dog hairs off your clothes, you need a lint roller in your life. While some people like to use rolls of Scotch tape, a quality lint roller is inexpensive and worth its weight in gold. It picks up little bits that vacuums can’t. I like to keep a large one at home for clothes, pillows, and soft furnishings; and then a smaller version in the car or my purse for last-minute touch-ups.

Dishwasher Gloves: An oldie but a goodie. This last-minute, everyday fail-safe for pet hair involves nothing more than popping on a set of rubber dishwashing gloves and sweeping your hand over the area you need to “defuzz.” It’s a quick, cheap, and effective hack for small cleanups when you don’t have a lint roller.

Handy Hint

Sprinkling my Doggy Deodorizer (see page 51) over carpets and upholstery before you vacuum loosens hair and acts as an odor neutralizer and room freshener.