Thought for Rejuvenation
How often do you laugh per day?
I’m lucky if I crack a smile
One to ten times
Ten to twenty times
Too many times to count
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I had always dreamed of a fairy-tale wedding complete with the perfect dress, ceremony, and groom. Well, my dream almost came true.
The morning of the wedding, my hairdresser said, “Sweetie, today is your wedding day. Something is bound to go wrong. It always does. Whatever happens, just enjoy it and laugh, because it’s your special day.”
The ceremony began right on cue. My aunt, a polished pianist, was playing the piano beautifully. The families had been seated. I was standing in the foyer, holding my father’s arm. The bridesmaids were lined up in front of me. Then something alarming happened.
Dr. Charles Holman, one my husband’s favorite seminary professors, was officiating the wedding. When the music stopped briefly—it was about to change for the bridesmaids to enter—Dr. Holman took that as his cue to begin the ceremony.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God and man to bring together James and Arlene in holy matrimony.” The only problem was I was still in the hallway. He continued for what seemed an eternity reading his notes, never noticing that I (the bride, the star of the show) had not even entered the building. Finally, he asked, “Who gives this woman to this man in holy matrimony?” Baffled, he looked for my father to answer the question and realized he had begun without us.
Meanwhile, out in the foyer, I was incredulous and in need of some oxygen. Who would have ever imagined I’d miss the beginning of my own wedding? The doors opened, and those bridesmaids flew down the center aisle. My moment to enter had finally arrived.
You could feel the tension lift out of the church as I walked down that aisle. Dr. Holman recovered beautifully, making a joke of his terrible mistake and conducting the rest of the ceremony with warmth, sincerity, and no further foibles.
I remembered the advice of my hairdresser just hours before. Something is bound to go wrong. It always does. Yes, something big had indeed gone wrong, but you know what? I didn’t mind having my “picture perfect ceremony” ruined. Quite the contrary, I couldn’t have planned a more memorable, funny, unpredictable, priceless moment.
When things don’t turn out exactly as you planned, learn to laugh. Isn’t it true that the funniest things happen when life doesn’t go according to the script? That’s probably why America’s Funniest Home Videos is still airing after 19 seasons. Viewers keep tuning in to watch funny accidents, mishaps, and practical jokes. Bumps, bruises, and broken items are funny when they happen to someone else. They’re much harder to laugh about when they happen to you.
If you can learn to laugh despite the many inconveniences life throws your way, you’ll be able to stay young longer. You can even poke fun at the aging process as Pam Farrel does in her book, Fantastic After 40: The Savvy Woman’s Guide to Her Best Season of Life:
Old Is When
Going braless pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
Getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.
An all-nighter means not getting up to use the bathroom.19
There’s good reason why television sitcoms, funny movies, and comedy acts are popular. It feels good to laugh. Even the medical community attests to the positive power of laughter. Studies have shown that laughter increases dopamine, which is the pleasure chemical messenger in the brain. Laughing gives your face a break since it takes five times as many muscles to frown. Your lungs get a good workout during a belly laugh, providing more oxygen for the body. Laughing helps your abs too, and compared to sit-ups, it’s a lot more fun. Laughter can also act as a natural painkiller, increasing your tolerance for pain.
In his 1979 book, Anatomy of an Illness, Norman Cousins describes how he fought the pain of a prolonged illness with laughter. He checked into a hotel room and put himself on an unorthodox dose of vitamins, funny books, and movies. His symptoms ceased.20 Over the years, researchers have explored the impact of laughter and health. They’ve found that laughter can help you cope with stress, strengthen your immune system, decrease pain, and even reduce your risk of heart disease.
British researchers tested a group of men and women, ages 35 to 55, to measure how many happy moments they had throughout the day. They found the happiest people had 32 percent lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol, which has been linked to abdominal obesity, type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, and other disorders. The happy group also had lower levels of fibrinogen, an inflammatory marker that predicts future coronary heart disease. On the other hand, the least-happy people in the study had 12 times higher levels of this problematic chemical.21
Maybe you’d like to have more laughter in your life, but you just don’t think of yourself as a funny person, or there’s not much to laugh about in your life right now. You can glean some tips from “Laughter Clubs,” a unique social experience offered at retirement homes, therapists’ offices, and medical centers such as the Cancer Treatment Center of America.
If you were to walk into a Laughter Club, first there’s the greeting laugh. You make eye contact with another person in the laughter club and start belly laughing. Sure, it’s contrived at first, but it’s not long before genuine laughter kicks into gear. And even if it doesn’t, fake laughter has been documented to have positive effects as well.
Then the group leader takes the participants through laugh-related exercises. In one exercise, all the participants stand in a circle with the leader in the middle. Each person puts their fingertips on their cheekbones, chest, or lower abdomen and makes “ha ha” sounds until they feel vibrations in their body. Before long, everyone is laughing because laughter is contagious.
You can create your own laughter club at home by greeting your family members with a smile and laugh, watching a funny home movie or favorite sitcom after dinner, or playing charades to depict how your day went.
Chocolate also alleviates pain. My grandmother lives in an assisted living center, and I bring her one pound of assorted dark chocolates whenever I visit. She looks forward to it and so do I because she shares. Thankfully, research is on the side of dark chocolate, praising the antioxidants found in dark chocolate that contains over 70 percent cocoa.
I love how this WebMD article, “Dark Chocolate Is Healthy Chocolate,” begins: “Got high blood pressure? Try a truffle. Worried about heart disease? Buy a bon-bon.”22
That’s the kind of health advice women like. But before you go chocolate crazy, remember you still have to deal with the extra calories of that dark chocolate bar, so think moderation. I remember buying a one-pound dark chocolate bar that I was going to use for baking at Christmastime. I got busy and didn’t bake a thing. I hate to admit I ate that giant bar instead—not in one sitting, but let’s say it didn’t take me much longer than that.
See, there’s a funny failure I can laugh about (and not repeat anytime soon, I hope).
Thought for Rejuvenation
How often do you laugh per day?
I’m lucky if I crack a smile
One to ten times
Ten to twenty times
Too many times to count
Act of eXpression
Create your own laughter club this week. Watch an episode of a favorite funny show. Skip the front page of the newspaper and read the comics instead. Look through an old family album and retell your favorite funny stories.