Adolescence . . . can be . . . the cruelest place on Earth.
It can really be heartless.

— Tori Amos

 

So you want your teen to be more responsible, more mature, and more respectful. We all would. But before we dive into the how-tos of boundaries and limits, enter with me into the world of adolescence.

Most of us wouldn’t dream of interviewing for a new job without doing some research: asking people, checking out the operations of the targeted company on the Web, and looking up its financial data. Though it’s tempting to jump right into dealing with teen problems, you need to have the bigger and broader picture of the world your teen inhabits. Otherwise, you may not understand the person you are trying to help. To a teen, being understood is everything.