When a stoner is lucky enough to score a bag of weed, the next step is deciding how to smoke it. The good thing is, you got options with this variety of paraphernalia.
Joint
Is there anything more perfect than a joint? It’s portable. It lights fast and stays lit. It can accommodate anywhere from two to eight people. It smells nice. And it gets you high! With all the various apparatus available (see below), the good ol’ joint is still very popular and will always remain a good option. And if you want to jazz it up, try leopard or zebra skins.
Pipe (or Bowl)
Just as commonly used as the joint, pipes are great because they’re compact, travel well, are easy to use, can accommodate a small group, and come in all kinds of cool designs and media from glass to wood to metal to rock to plastic. Just don’t forget the screens.
Chillum
Chillums are like pipes, but instead of the bowl being turned on a ninety-degree angle, it simply is built into the end opposite the mouthpiece. Personally, we prefer pipes because with chillums, you have to sort of hold the piece upright and crick your neck to get a hit. But if you’re offering, we’re accepting!
Bong
There may not be two more exciting words in the English language when used together than “Bong Hit!” Bongs give you the most bang for your buck of any smoking device. The keys are that they’re bigger than pipes and can produce and hold more smoke, and they contain a water chamber through which the smoke passes, cooling it considerably and allowing your body to inhale a lot more of it, while also removing many impurities and carcinogens. As many people say, “One bong hit and I’m good.” For about thirty minutes, that is.
Hookah
Hookah, lookah, doopity, doo, I’ve got another method for you. The hookah is basically a fancy party bong, originally developed in Persia around the sixteenth century for smoking sweet-flavored tobaccos, that has been co-opted by some stoners for use with sweet-flavored marijuana.
Party Bong
A party bong has the same technical qualities of a bong, with one added bonus—instead of one opening to draw smoke from, it can have anywhere from two to eight tubes coming out of the chamber so that many people can toke together. They also come in awesome designs, like skulls and dragon heads with LED lights in the eye sockets. The only drawback to using a party bong is that, during a hit, it’s hard not to burst out laughing while looking at your friends doing all they can to suck in a big one. And there’s no worse buzzkill than guffawing during a blast and losing all that precious smoke!
Dugout and Bat
Also known as a “one-hitter,” a dugout is a small wooden container, shaped sort of like a smaller cigarette box, that has one large chamber for ground weed, and a narrow round chamber to hold the “bat,” which is a hollow metal or glass tube about the size of a cigarette, with a mouthpiece on one end and an opening on the opposite end for the weed. To use, dig the bat into the weed chamber until the end fills with stuff. Then light and draw. Great for travel, or for when you just need a quick pick-me-up.
Vaporizor
You gotta love technology, and the vaporizer is the apex of stoner technology. Developed by “Eagle Bill” Wood and introduced at the 1994 Cannabis Cup, the beauty of the vaporizer is that it uses a heating element (not fire) to extract THC from cannabis, producing the exact same high as burning weed, but offering many positive developments in health, stealth, and wealth.
HEALTH. Since no organic matter is burned, you are inhaling vapor, not smoke. According to studies by the University of California, San Francisco, vaporizing produces “virtually no exposure to harmful combustion products” such as tar, and extremely reduced emission of carbon monoxide.
STEALTH. Exhaled vapor is much stealthier than the lingering reek of pot smoke, as it produces far less odor, and it dissipates much faster than burned weed.
WEALTH. Because vaporizers extract THC with greater efficiency than burning it, you use almost half the amount of marijuana to get high, saving buko bucks.
There’s a lot to love about vaporizers, so look into them and ask for one for Christmas.
Eat It!
If you don’t want to inhale burning organic matter via smoking, and you have no vaporizer, or you just prefer the different kind of high that comes from digesting THC, your option is to open wide and eat it! See page 99 for instructions on how to make a peanut butter firecracker.
Improvised Pipes, Bowls, and Bongs
If you don’t have papers, or a proper pipe, or a chillum, or a bong, or a vaporizer, or some peanut butter, or any friends who have any of the above, you still got options! Not only is it very easy to make a pipe or a bowl or a bong or even a deluxe “gravity bong” from scratch, these improvised tools work almost as good as the real thing. You can use tinfoil, aluminum cans, apples, and other stuff. Turn to page 100 for the lowdown.
