CHAPTER 10

Step 6: Pre-Game and Game-Day Action

Our aspiration in our “just be it” journey is to fortify our brains, bodies, and minds beforehand, and then to navigate each exposure event with the following conscious intentions: (1) notice the initial surge of any automatic emotional and physical responses; (2) linger in the moment, not panicking; (3) remind ourselves that the reflex emotions and biological reactions are transitory; (4) swap negative mental messages with new positive taglines; (5) adjust our physical stances to channel blood, oxygen, and energy for effective breathing, clear thinking, and empowered speaking; (6) trek forward through the duration of the event, noticing shifts in our mental and physical strength; and (7) ride out the eventual descent of the intensity, ideally ending and recovering from the interpersonal encounter in a more relaxed state. Because this process—which could span mere minutes to an hour or longer—involves myriad mental and physical maneuvers that might be hard to remember and put in motion when our nerves kick in, it helps to combine all the work we have done thus far into tangible mental and physical checklists.

Legal communication experts Johnson and Hunter advise lawyers to develop mental and physical pre-game sequences in preparation for interpersonal interactions:

Sports psychologists teach that if you want to perform at a high level, you need a consistent mental and physical ritual on which to base your performance. This is to enable the mind, through repetition and practice, to control the body, and to enable the body to control the mind. Together, body and mind help control emotion.³⁹⁵

Just like athletes, actors, and dancers train, rehearse, warm up, and perform repetitive rituals—like listening to a rabble-rousing song through headphones or touching a baseball bat reverently to the plate—before starting every performance, we can do the same, to quash self-doubt and ignite strength.

PRE-GAME PLANNING

Naistadt recommends three sequences of pre-event prep: (1) a verbal rehearsal; (2) a physical/technical rehearsal; and (3) a mental rehearsal.³⁹⁶ Before you start to twitch at the idea of rehearsing once, let alone three times, these are not like traditional run-throughs that often exacerbate rather than reduce anxiety for us quiet folks. I would sooner leap off a moving Amtrak train than dry-run (or in lawyer terms, “moot”) a presentation before my academic or law office peers. My law faculty colleagues eagerly moot one another before conference presentations, and many lawyers do the same before oral arguments. Anytime anyone broaches the idea of mooting me, my response now is, “Um, thank you so much for the kind offer, but that’s not part of my process.” If you have a choice in how to prepare for a performance event, it’s 100 percent OK for you to do it your way.

The three pre-game sequences suggested here differ from “just do it” rehearsals around our friends or peers, and vary from the traditional advice to “practice in front of the mirror,” which for us can feel inauthentic. Building on Naistadt’s rehearsal sequence, we will construct three pre-game routines tailored to the law context: (1) brain pre-game (preparing our substantive material and then forging links in a chain between our thoughts and our voice, through thinking, writing, and speaking); (2) body pre-game; and (3) mind pre-game. While the brain and the mind might at first glance sound like the same thing, in this context the brain does the functional hard work of legal analysis and organization of law-related concepts, while the mind emotionally fortifies to best handle each interpersonal exchange.

Brain Pre-Game

The brain pre-game starts with our normal substantive preparation for a law-related event: reading research sources, extracting key information, analyzing the legal issues, vetting strengths and weaknesses of theories, and anticipating questions and challenges. Then, we deliberately create brain-body-mind links, first through writing, and then through speaking aloud (in solitude). We organize and write out our thoughts, and then read our notes aloud—connecting thoughts to written words to speech, consciously solidifying the concepts into our memory banks for faster retrieval later in the heat of the performance moment.

The writing process is an instrumental medium for quiet law students and lawyers to think through tough problems, test possible solutions, and formulate clear answers. In a tribute to U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice Warren E. Burger, the Honorable Kenneth F. Ripple, a judge for the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit and former clerk of Justice Burger’s, described how the Chief Justice used legal writing practice as a conduit for critical thinking and problem-solving:

For the Chief Justice, writing was not just a means of communication. It was a necessary tool for thinking through the most difficult problems. For him, tough analytical thought and precise legal reasoning were not the product of oral disputation. Rather, the fundamental intellectual process of lawyering and judging occurred when the validity of an initial hunch or intuitive flash was tested by pen meeting legal pad. As the pen met paper, private musings and oral dialogue were transformed into solid analysis or discarded as useless as he searched for the appropriate outline of the opinion, the “best” phrase, the “right” words to convey a thought. After reading briefs, studying cases, and listening to oral arguments, he would often say, “Let’s see how it writes out.” ³⁹⁷

Building on the Chief Justice’s problem-solving process, we can use the mantra “write it out” in preparing for interpersonal encounters in the legal arena. We write as part of our brain pre-game for two reasons. First, scientists indicate that the act of writing (rather than just thinking) helps us remember concepts better, especially if we hand-write instead of type. Stanislas Dehaene, a psychologist at the Collège de France in Paris, indicates that “[w]hen we write, a unique neural circuit is automatically activated.”³⁹⁸ Likewise, writer Lizette Borreli describes a study by two psychology scientists, Pam Mueller of Princeton University and Daniel Oppenheimer of the University of California, Los Angeles, confirming that “[t]he old fashioned note taking method of pen and paper boosts memory and the ability to understand concepts and facts.”³⁹⁹ The act of writing by hand “is a better strategy to store and internalize ideas in the long haul. Writing by hand strengthens the learning process.”⁴⁰⁰ Although this method might seem time-consuming, it’s worth it; consider first handwriting your prep notes, and then typing them up into useable performance tools—a double-whammy for entrenching those thoughts and ideas into your brain for faster recall later in the interactive exchange. Second, because we already know that nerves can derail our breathing and thinking, our written prompts—for our eyes only—will serve as cues to help us course-correct in the moment. People might declare that the best speakers converse without notes (they quip, “it’s all up here!,” tapping their vast noggins), but the peak performance of us quiet individuals absolutely necessitates the artful use of written prompts.

Let’s envision a brain pre-game plan for a potential Socratic dialogue:⁴⁰¹ either a one-on-one meeting with a professor or a supervising attorney, a Socratic questioning in class, or an oral argument in court. You likely already know the topic of the anticipated conversation: a particular case or group of cases, a statute, a legal issue affecting a client, or all of the above. To prepare for a Socratic dialogue, start by situating the conversation within a context and overall framework: “This case is about _____. This statute is about __________. This conflict is about ___________.” Then, write down bite-size pieces of information. For instance, if the dialogue will focus on a precedent case, note: (1) the parties, (2) the governing jurisdiction, (3) the date, (4) the basic facts of the legal matter, (5) the legal issue sparking the conflict, (6) the governing rule, (7) the court’s holding on the legal issue, and (8) two or three reasons for the court’s decision. For a statute, break down the rule components into a checklist of required elements or a list of factors the decision-maker will weigh.

Embrace the tried-and-true “IRAC” (Issue, Rule, Application/Analysis, Conclusion) structure to prepare for more challenging queries. Some professors might pronounce, “I don’t use IRAC!” They likely do use some form or variation of it; they just might call it something else. That’s OK. Regardless, let’s use IRAC here because it absolutely works as a starting point to organize your legal analysis. Target the issues in the case or transaction, the rule governing the legal issues, the application of the rule to the circumstances of the case or transaction, and the likely result or desired conclusion. Use IRAC to anticipate questions you might be asked on each part of the legal analysis, and craft responses. Prepare notes in IRAC structure (with headings for each component) to rely on during your exposure event.

At some point in a Socratic exchange, you will be asked a question that stumps you. This does not make you incapable or unqualified. It’s the law, not you. The law stumps. That is precisely what makes it so enticing as an intellectual endeavor. Knowing this eventuality in advance, first contemplate categories of inquiries the questioner might pose, and tailor your preparation accordingly. Study the questioner in advance, if possible. Examine the types of questions he or she asks others. Listen to the language and terminology embedded in the questions. Try to discern a pattern, or words or phrases that help you glean what categories, themes, or types of information the inquisitor typically seeks.

The trickiest Socratic questions ask you to apply the rule(s) to alternate hypothetical scenarios. This exchange requires you to dance intellectually a bit more, executing quick mental twists, turns, and sidesteps—a challenging feat for introverts who need time within conversations to problem-solve. Planning ahead, consider alternate factual circumstances, apply the rule(s) to those situations, and assess whether the result shifts. Write these down and assign them easily recognizable labels: “Insurance Hypo.” “Landlord-Tenant Hypo.” “Offshore Investor Hypo.” “Good Samaritan Hypo.”

In rehearsing for the flummoxing moments, think in advance about each party’s “theory” of the case or transaction. What contentions or claims does each side assert? Craft a “theme” of the case or transaction. Is there a “public policy” underlying the parties’ relationship or conflict? Is the legal opportunity or dispute really about a societal concept like ethics, equality, freedom from discrimination, order, reliability and predictability in the law, economy, fairness, resource conservation, morality, etc.? Is it really about a broken promise, bias, fear, greed, or closed-mindedness? If you struggle to brainstorm a “theme,” think about what concepts, ideas, or imagery might comprise a 30-second movie trailer, an anthem, a commercial jingle, a slogan, a car bumper sticker, or a hashtag for the case or transactional relationship: when the questioner poses a query that momentarily stymies you, you can invoke this motif to answer the question. For example, if a Socratic questioner asks you to apply a rule to a confusing hypothetical you had not previously considered, you can refer to your “theme” notes and respond, “Well, the theme or purpose of the rule is to create an even playing field, so to promote equality among the players in the hypothetical, we would need to…”

When you finish contemplating, thinking through, and writing down your substantive analysis in a useful format (ideally, writing the concepts by hand first, for a deeper brain-body connection, and then typing them into a useful, readable format), grab a cup of coffee, find a comfortable, private, low-stakes environment, and begin reading your notes out loud. Keep it informal. You do not need to pretend you are in the moment, with the Socratic questioner sitting across the desk, table, classroom, or courtroom from you. Right now, you are planting the words in your brain, getting comfortable saying them aloud, owning them. Your writing forged the first links in the brain chain: from thought, to hand, to memory. Now, the reading continues the linkage: eyes recognizing words, brain processing their meaning, and voice expressing the concepts aloud, further entrenching the ideas in your brain. Later, in the real exposure event, the words already will feel like yours. Read your notes aloud several times. Hear and feel their vowels and consonants. Right now, you are not being mooted or peer-reviewed. You are not rehearsing in front of the mirror. You simply are fusing a deeper mental bond between the thoughts in your head, captured in the words on the pages in your hands, recognized by your eyes, reinforced by your brain, and transmitted outwardly through your voice.

Body Pre-Game

In anticipating an interpersonal interaction, for many of us, physical avoidance mode kicks into high gear. We self-protect by steering a wide berth around the event locale until the last possible second. However, the more we know what the exposure space looks like, what physical objects occupy the room, what sounds, lighting, and smells are present, the better we control our personal positioning and movement within that environment—which will bolster our thought process.

The body pre-game involves taking a field trip to the event space if possible, putting your body in the room, or at least close to it. For a meeting, do a reconnaissance mission to survey the professor’s or supervising attorney’s office and take a peek inside—how many chairs are present? Are there windows? Is the desk piled high? Where will you sit? How far away from the professor or the supervising attorney will you be? For a presentation, negotiation, or argument, travel to the classroom, the conference room, or the courtroom, if feasible. Scout. Investigate. Is there a podium? A microphone? Is there a platform for your notes and materials? How far away from the other participants will you be?

In the body pre-game, think about how you will enter the space, what direction you will walk, where you will sit or stand, how you will position your physical frame, and where you will place your written materials. Consider the most appropriate physical objects to bring into the event that will make you feel comfortable and supported but which will not weigh you down or hinder your movement. Once, I had an intern who consistently arrived at my office for assignments, laden down by a cornucopia of bags: a purse, a laptop bag, a lunch tote, and a book bag, all in a rainbow of patterns and textures. She also juggled a Starbucks tumbler, an iPhone, and sunglasses. Every time she entered my office, items clattered to the floor. She fumbled with her belongings, and took a solid 10 minutes to calm down and engage in conversation. Each encounter commenced with jitters on both sides of the desk; we both had to work to settle down and focus. We certainly need particular physical items to buoy us through the experience but also should ensure they will not overburden us or distract our audience. Transport notes in an easily accessible folder or binder. Even if a laptop is appropriate for the particular interpersonal engagement (which, often, it is not), you don’t want the booting-up process or dreaded screen freeze to rattle you. Print paper copies of your notes, and make sure they are easy to read, with large typeface and organized by quick recall headings, such as Issue, Rule, and Holding.

The next part of the body pre-game is to practice the physical adjustments you will make to your frame that will channel energy, blood flow, and air in the most effective way, paving the way for a calm heart, clear thinking, and poised expression. Experiment with different stances—seated and standing. Summon your inner athlete. Sit in a chair—like it’s a throne—or stand behind that podium and think: “power, strength, elongated vertical alignment, horizontal openness.” Balanced, planted feet; shoulders back; head high; arms and hands open. Eyes up. Breathe. Do an Amy Cuddy power pose. Imagine forging eye contact with a nodder and smiler. Project your voice, just once, to the farthest spot in the room. Invoke Laurie Hernandez: “I got this.”

Further, think about how to treat your body in advance of each event. How can you make it stronger, fortifying your machine?

Mind Pre-Game

In the mind pre-game, return to your comfortable private zone, relax, and walk through the exposure scenario in your head, step-by-step, from the instant you enter the room, until the moment you complete the event and return to quietude. Envision again where you will sit or stand. Imagine the touch and feel of the chair, the desk, and/or the podium. Breathe. Anticipate the arrival of those old negative messages and physical reactions. Remember that they are “short-term visitors.”⁴⁰² Invoke your fresh taglines. Say them out loud. Tweak your stance and posture. Visualize moving through the event, referring to your notes and prompts as needed. Remind yourself that any uncomfortable mental and physical reflexes that pop up will subside; they always do. This is just one exposure event on a gradual agenda to help you become your most authentic lawyer self. You can do this. One event at a time.

TREAT EACH EXPOSURE LIKE A DIALOGUE INSTEAD OF A PERFORMANCE

Many exposure events simply constitute a conversation about the law between you and another human being—someone whose job or role is to help you learn or develop in a new way, or to collaborate with you to solve a legal problem. These individuals might be nice, compassionate, and nurturing about it, or they might not be. As in any other dialogue you engage in throughout the day, if you do not understand a question, say so. For example, “I’m not sure I understand your question; could you please restate it?” If you ran into a professor, a supervising attorney, or even a judge on the street or in the park, and you did not grasp the phrasing of a query about the weather, sports, or a news event, you might simply say, “Pardon me?” or “Hmm, what do you mean exactly?” In legal scenarios, we can, and should, respectfully seek clarity in communications. Ultimately, if you cannot answer a question, it is not the demise of your legal career; it is a learning moment full of opportunity—not only substantively, but mentally and emotionally. Be honest. Focus on your “theme” of the conversation referenced in your notes: “Respectfully, I’m not sure exactly what you mean but the purpose of this rule is to foster an even playing field, and thus in these circumstances …” If you absolutely cannot fathom an answer, simply say, “Respectfully, I’m not sure precisely how to respond to that question, but I will promptly investigate.” How can anyone fault you for being honest and willing to seek knowledge? Not every lawyer knows the answer to every legal question without research and thought: it’s law practice, not law perfection.

CHANNEL YOUR NON-LEGAL ROCK STAR MOMENTS

Remind yourself how adept and formidable you are at interpersonal interaction in non-legal environments. Maybe you feel most studly on the softball field, jamming guitar riffs on stage with your band, conquering a yoga move no one else in your class has mastered, or soothing a bullied child on the playground. Invite that swagger into your legal persona.

FOCUS ON REALITY, NOT CATASTROPHE

If you enrolled in medical school instead of law school, your professors would not assign you to perform open-heart surgery on Day One; you’d likely step into anatomy class to experiment within and learn from a remarkably less dramatic and more incremental assignment. Similarly, in your law-related scenarios, you likely are not arguing before the U.S. Supreme Court (yet) or testifying before Congress (yet). However, as introverted, shy, or socially anxious law students and lawyers, we often catastrophize, building up performance-oriented events in our minds as if they are opening ceremonies of the Olympic Games and the world is watching. Let’s replace catastrophe with reality. We are not performing the lawyer equivalent of open-heart surgery. More like dissecting a frog (a computer-animated one—no animals will be injured in these experiments!): a low-stakes learning or developmental experience. Just one of a multitude in your career. Not even Super Bowl halftime shows or stadium concerts go perfectly. Madonna, Lady Gaga, U2’s The Edge, and Beyoncé have all fallen on, and in The Edge’s case fallen completely off, the stage. Get up and keep jamming.

WRITE PERSONAL TAGLINES TAILORED TO SPECIFIC EXPOSURE EVENTS

In Step 3, you drafted new mental messages to replace your outdated soundtrack. During the first few exposure events, or perhaps throughout your entire first exposure agenda, consider drafting one or two more taglines tailored specifically to each type of scenario. Write these mental prompts on a cheerful index card in colorful ink. Tape the card to your laptop, slip it into your binder or legal pad, or insert individual prompts into your phone calendar alerts. Here are some suggestions:

• This is not open-heart surgery, the State of the Union Address, the Super Bowl, or the Olympics. This is just a conversation with another human about the law.
• I engage in smart dialogue with others in my non-legal life all day long.
• Many legal questions are confusingly phrased; there is nothing wrong with stating that I don’t understand a question; law is about collaboratively seeking clarity.
• If I don’t know the answer to a question, I can invoke my “theme” to help me think through, and get to, an answer.
• This interaction is only a short (probably less than an hour) flicker in my multiple-decades-long legal career. It will end and I will be fine.
• I am intelligent.
• I work hard.
• I care about what I am doing and what I have to say.
• I will be a transformational and impactful lawyer, because I have empathy and understanding for quiet individuals like me.

When negative messages creep in, mindfully set them aside. You can do that for a few seconds. And then, a few more seconds. And a few more, to power you through the experience.

GAME-DAY PLANNING

Formidable athletes, actors, singers, and dancers conduct a wide variety of game-day or show-day rituals as they gear up to take the playing field or the stage, and as they commence their first movement or speak or sing their first word. Chris Martin, lead singer of the British rock band Coldplay, shared, “[T]here are about 18 things I have to do before I can go out to perform—most of them are too ridiculous to repeat!”⁴⁰³ From vocal or stretching exercises to yoga, or consuming particular foods, performers figure out what works best to put them in the right physical and mental zone and stick with it. Major league baseball players display plentiful at-bat rituals—touching the bat to the plate, yanking a shirt sleeve, hiking up a knee, adjusting batting gloves, tapping the bat to their cleats—every single time they anticipate a pitch.⁴⁰⁴ Golfers approach the tee, settling their Softspikes into the turf, gripping the driver, taking practice swings. Actors tarry in the eaves of the stage, practicing diaphragmatic breathing, stretching mouth muscles in anticipation of the curtain lift. To prepare our bodies and minds to perform at optimal levels, even in the face of nerves and anxiety, we must develop similar game-day rituals. We move through the steps of our tailor-made rituals intentionally as we approach each exposure event, aligning our physical frames and settling our minds, channeling our oxygen, blood, and energy to enhance our clarity and strengthen our voices.

Socrates seized private time during his game-day ritual: “[He] would often prepare … by ‘centering’ before engaging in a dialogue … At the start of [a] party at the home of the playwright Agathon, Socrates, the eagerly awaited guest of honor, [was] conspicuously absent.”⁴⁰⁵ Jason Connell, creator of “Change the World 101” and a leadership consultant, describes his routine: “Ten minutes before a speech I start listening to one of Girl Talk’s [an American deejay] albums (I’m superstitious about listening [to] Girl Talk before a speech). After a few minutes, I start jumping around to raise my energy levels. Two minutes [before] the speech, I turn off my iPod and review my notes one last time. As I’m being introduced I tell myself, ‘you’re going to be f****ing awesome,’ start smiling, and step on stage.”⁴⁰⁶ Naistadt, an actor and public speaking consultant, also spends time alone in the few minutes before she takes the stage.⁴⁰⁷ Her warmup routine before every public speaking event involves “15 minutes of physical exercise, 15 minutes of meditation, 5 minutes of just talking out loud; [she] may even throw in a tongue twister or two.”⁴⁰⁸

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I learned the hard way that I need a game-day routine like Socrates’, Connell’s, and Naistadt’s. One summer, I taught a new law school course on civil discovery. The first day of the session, I entered the classroom toting my materials, began setting up, and overheard that one of my students had forgotten his laptop cord. I knew I had an extra one in my office. I raced down the hall, grabbed the cord from my desk drawer, jogged back to the classroom, handed him the cord, approached the podium, smiled at my new crew of students, and began to speak. Except I couldn’t. I had no air. My nerves frazzled. My heart beat like Morse code … again. I could not believe this was happening after all the work on my introversion and social anxiety I thought I already had accomplished. I croaked, “Sorry, I think … I need to sit down. I guess I’m a little nervous.” A wonderful student—a veteran of Yale School of Drama who wrote for the L.A. Times and worked in Hollywood as a writer-producer—countered, “Of course you’re out of breath, Professor, you just ran a half mile to and from your office.” She was right. What horrible game-day behavior! I sat down, caught my breath, and started again. Whew.

From that debacle, I learned that no matter how hyped-up, adrenalin-pumped, or rock star–prepared I feel before a class, I must NEVER race to get there. My pre-game ritual for teaching a new class or group of students involves a brain prep (writing out my notes, typing them up, and reading them aloud several times), body prep (scoping out my classroom in advance, testing equipment, and practicing my stance behind the podium), and a full mind rehearsal a few days beforehand—chilling on my couch in a library-like space I created in my apartment, surrounded by my books, graffiti photos from my travels, and pictures of my dogs. Then, I completely stop preparing 24 hours before the first class. I discovered that my former habit of overpreparing for every speaking event often backfired and undermined my natural strength. Now, on game day, I allow myself to read my substantive notes aloud one more time in solitude, and then I slow-walk to the teaching location. If weather prevents a walking commute, I at least circle the building once or twice before entering. I avoid people (even if I have to pretend to be engrossed deeply in a cell phone conversation and can only communicate through a nod, a smile, and a wave). I try to dodge conversation on my journey to the classroom. I stay in my head, in my personal zone. Before entering the room, I stand outside the door and take five full breaths (pretending to be checking something in my bag if I must). I enter the room. I smile at somebody. I walk to the podium, and arrange my props. I take a dry-erase marker, face the board, and write an agenda in the upper left corner. Breathe five more breaths while writing. Listen to what the students are chatting about: the dorm, something funny that happened in Torts earlier that day, what they ate for lunch. I turn around and ask one of them a question about lunch, Torts, the dorm. Non-legal conversation to ease the moment, laugh, calm the beating heart. One more deep breath. I approach the podium, ground my feet, balance my stance, shift shoulders back, make eye contact with a nodder or smiler, tell myself, “You love legal writing and teaching. Focus on the love,” project my voice to the person farthest away. “OK, let’s get started. Today we’re going to talk about …”

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PRE-GAME AND GAME-DAY PLANNING ADVICE FOR SPECIFIC LAW-RELATED EXPOSURE EVENTS

If you are not sure how to begin, take a look at the following suggestions for pre-game and game-day planning for a variety of realistic exposure events in the law school and law office environments.

ADVICE FOR LAW STUDENT SCENARIOS

Law School Meeting with a Professor

• Brain Preparation: Prepare a discussion agenda. Write it down, type it up, and print it out so you can take it to the meeting in hard-copy—not on a laptop. You want the encounter to go smoothly and efficiently, so it’s best to avoid fumbling around with technology. Paper allows you to maximize eye contact and minimize technological glitches. Prepare specific questions and write them down: the more you can use your written notes as talking points to guide and drive the conversation, the more you forge momentum, calming any rapid breathing and heart rate and maintaining a connection with the professor. In preparation, read your agenda and questions out loud a few times. Review the professor’s website biography (for information and possible interesting conversation-starter material only; do not be intimidated by the professional pedigree; instead, look for interesting bonding nuggets: hometown, areas of interest, life experiences). Also, consider scanning the professor’s teaching evaluations (prior students might have described personality quirks that provide keen insights—focus on the positive).
• Body Preparation: Do a scouting mission to the professor’s office so you know where it is, and, if possible get a glimpse inside, observing the physical layout (chairs, desk, windows, lighting, etc.). Practice how you will adjust your physical stance while waiting in the hallway, entering the room, and taking a seat. Think through how you will manage your physical possessions and props to minimize fumbling.
• Mind Preparation: Remember that the professor might seem intimidating but he or she is just a human being who is eager to share knowledge with you about the law. Resolve to show the professor that you care about the subject and are excited to learn (nothing makes a professor happier). Review your new taglines.
• Game Day: On game day, find a quiet place and do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Slow-walk to the professor’s office, and take five deep breaths before entering, balancing your stance and opening your frame to get that oxygen, blood, and energy flowing constructively. Remember your new taglines and even read them off a notecard before you enter the office if you need to remind yourself of their power and might.
  • When you enter the professor’s office, notice any physical objects that you could mention to establish rapport (pet photos, artwork, sculptures, quirky desk items).
  • Look the professor in the eye.
  • Sit down, adopt your balanced seated stance, and breathe.
  • Use your notes, and take notes too.
  • Limit the meeting to 20–30 minutes (unless the professor seems engrossed), respect the professor’s time limitations (office hours and student meetings can be tiring for introverted professors especially), and model respect for other students awaiting their turn for office hours.
  • Say thank you, make eye contact, and smile as you leave.

Socratic Classroom Experience

• Brain Preparation: In anticipating a Socratic classroom experience, for as many weeks as possible beforehand, observe the professor’s pattern of questioning other students (he/she likely has a rhythm of inquiry; instead of taking class notes on other students’ answers, transcribe the professor’s questions word-for-word and use them as prompts in your own preparation).
  • Prepare Props: It is impossible for us introverted, shy, or socially anxious folks to remember all our brilliant thoughts in those stressful moments. Write them all down. Again, I recommend hard-copy notes (it is hard to find information quickly on a laptop, and, inevitably, in an inopportune moment, the laptop will freeze). Use the IRAC formula (Issue, Rule, Application, Conclusion) to organize the legal concepts within the day’s assigned reading. Consider alternate hypotheticals and possible questions, and write out a few sentences to address each. Use color-coding and one- or two-word prompts if they help you retrieve information quickly (“Rule,” “Counter-Argument,” “Public Policy”). Make a list of any new words/terminology and their definitions. In preparation, read your notes aloud a few times.
  • Work on a “theme” of the subject matter in that day’s reading, and plan to invoke your theme if you do not know the answer to the professor’s question: “Well, this case seems to be about a fair playing field,” “Well, this case boils down to freedom of contract,” “Well, this case involves the competing concerns of public safety and the right to be free from discrimination …”
  • See the general discussion under the heading of Brain Pre-Game earlier in this chapter for additional tips on substantive preparation for a Socratic experience.
• Body Preparation: You likely are already familiar with your law classroom, but you can rehearse your physical adjustments, sitting with legs uncrossed, feet firmly planted on the ground, shoulders back, spine elongated, arms uncrossed. Practice maneuvering your reading notes on the desk, and decide if making changes in formatting or printing would help you access information more quickly during a Q&A. Make a notecard with your tagline reminders and tuck it into your class prep notes for easy access.
• Mind Preparation: Stay focused on reality, not catastrophe. Much of our internal drama toward the Socratic classroom orbits around our fear that peers scrutinize our every word with critical judgment. In the week or two leading up to this exposure event, look around; many of your peers are—much to the professor’s chagrin!—multitasking. Others will root for you because, if your Socratic questioning proceeds swimmingly, the professor might stay focused on you for a while instead of shifting to a new questionee. Yes, there might be a few of your peers who judge, but who cares—you don’t need everyone in the room to like you. Laser-focus on your one-on-one conversation with the professor, and tune everyone else out for the 10–45 minutes you might be on-call.
  • If you know the date that you are on-call, consider visiting the professor during office hours beforehand to create a human connection. Candidly share that you are a bit nervous about class participation and want to do the most effective preparatory work possible and contribute well. Have a few substantive questions handy about the subject matter of the course (see suggestions above for how to handle office hours). Also indicate that you have paid attention to the professor’s pattern of questions in class by asking, for example, “I’ve noticed that you ask questions about X. In preparing for class, should I be looking for _____?” Use the dialogue during office hours to practice having a normal conversation with the professor. Later, visualize the classroom dialogue as a similar follow-up conversation rather than a performance for an audience. Some professors still might give advice like “just do it,” “fake it till you make it,” or “get over your fears.” Remember, we already know that type of advice doesn’t work for us. That’s OK. You’re doing the work you need to do to be your authentic self.
  • If your professor cold-calls (so you do not have a scheduled on-call date), also consider visiting the professor during office hours as early in the semester as possible. Honestly share that you are a bit nervous but determined to prepare, participate, and contribute. Consider requesting that he/she assign you a specific day to be on-call for the first time in that class so you can manage your reticence toward the event a bit more effectively. Explain that you do not want special treatment but you would like to conquer your trepidation by preparing for the Socratic questioning on a known date (Note: Some professors might bristle at this; not your fault; it’s worth a try!).
• Game Day: Take some time alone before the class. Do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Slow-walk to the classroom. When you settle into your seat, adopt your balanced seated stance. Breathe. Look at the professor: he or she is just a human being who wants to teach you. Be open. When your Socratic dialogue starts:
  • Recalibrate your balanced seated stance.
  • Breathe.
  • Make eye contact with the professor.
  • Project your voice to the person farthest away in the room (or at least to the professor).
  • Pause when you need to think (It’s OK to say, “Hmm, let me think. [breathe; check your notes; invoke your case themes] … OK, the governing rule here has four parts … This case is about …”).
  • Use your IRAC notes.
  • Listen to the words in the questions. Use your terminology list and break challenging or confusing questions down: “You mentioned the word intent which is defined as …” “OK, well reasonableness is defined as …”
  • If you start to falter, remember your personal taglines (keep the reminder notecard handy if you need it).
  • Refer back to your theme.
  • Breathe. Remember, you are trying your best, and you do not need to be perfect; this is a real conversation, not a scripted Hollywood movie.

Law School Group Meeting

Personally, I dreaded law school group work; I didn’t realize that, as an introvert among extroverts, my resistance stemmed from the peer pressure to speak before I was ready and the sense that something was wrong with me because I didn’t readily jump into collective brainstorming mode … Here’s some advice I wished I had known.

• Brain Preparation: As an introverted or quiet thinker who solves problems through contemplative writing, you actually might be more prepared for a group meeting than others. Channel that advance work into a role for yourself. Perhaps prepare a proposed meeting agenda (on paper or via email) for the group. When the more dominant voices take charge in the actual meeting, you can use your written agenda to establish your voice. Craft a statement or two that will help you intervene or interrupt when extroverted or dominant members of the group take over: “Guys, I want to make sure we don’t forget about X; can we focus on that for a minute or two?” “Gang, I had a question about Y; can we focus on that for a moment?” “Hey, I also think it’s important that we address Z; can we shift to that for a second?” In preparation, read your notes aloud a few times.
• Body Preparation: Determine the location of the group meeting, and assess where within the space you want to sit that will make you feel most comfortable. Practice your physical adjustments, sitting with legs and arms uncrossed, feet firmly planted on the ground, shoulders back, spine elongated. Breathe.
• Mind Preparation: This is an ideal exposure event to champion your introvert strengths. In a small audience of your peers rather than a professor and a large lecture class, it’s the perfect opportunity to showcase your thoughtful planning, active listening, problem-solving, and contemplative writing. Resist feeling pressure to conform to the talkers in the group; assert yourself in your authentic way, contributing through the written word (agenda-crafting, note-taking, follow-up summarizing). On occasion, use your written props to empower you to interrupt the fray and keep the meeting on track. In preparation, review your taglines.
• Game Day: Find a quiet space and do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Head to the meeting location early. Slow-walk to the room. As you enter, find the seat that best works for you. Adopt your balanced seated stance. Breathe. Circulate your agenda. Volunteer to be the note-taker. Use your rehearsed interrupting statement. At the end of the meeting, employ your notes as an excuse to intervene or interrupt again: “Guys, I just want to make sure I’ve captured our plan accurately; let me read through our meeting highlights …” After the meeting, edit your notes, and use them as a vehicle to communicate with the group in writing: “Thank you for a productive meeting. Attached please find our agenda notes …”

Law School Presentation

Perhaps your legal writing professor has asked you to report to the class on facts gathered from a hypothetical client, or a seminar professor has assigned you to deliver a presentation on a research topic. These are also prime exposure events and probably the most effective interim steps on an exposure journey because they afford you the most control! A law school presentation is more manageable for us introverted, shy, or socially anxious humans than a Socratic dialogue, groupwork, or an oral argument; we don’t have to anticipate and manage unpredictable substantive interruptions!

• Brain Preparation: As you draft the presentation, construct an engaging beginning (an anecdote, a vivid example, or a captivating image—invoking a law-related theme), a middle (with three to five concrete points), and a conclusion, reiterating your theme. Write out the entire presentation by hand (to commence the brain-body-mind connection). Then, type it up in outline form and read it aloud several times, forging deeper connections between your thoughts, words, and voice. Also, consider creating helpful physical props to jog your memory during the presentation and engage with the audience.
  • Handouts: I love a good handout. Handouts help reduce public speaking anxiety by giving us an excuse to move around the room before a presentation, to connect with people through a physical object rather than talking, and to demonstrate intellectual creativity in written form. Plus, people focus on the handout and give us a chance to get comfortable until we are ready to make eye contact.
  • PowerPoint (or Keynote or Prezi): Accompanying spoken words with engaging visuals and tasteful humorous images can relax the audience and connect different types of learners with the material. As a lawyer, I never understood or used PowerPoint. But, as I developed as a teacher, I began accompanying my lectures with slides highlighting key rules, interspersed with colorful and amusing imagery to enliven the presentation of legal principles. Students chuckle at some of the visual depictions, and their smiles help everyone relax. (Note: Obviously always be professional and tasteful in your image choices.)
  • Physical objects: Does the subject matter of your presentation involve a material object you could bring into the room and pass around? When I create legal writing assignments, I try to incorporate a tangible object into each hypothetical fact pattern: a Peruvian ceramic candlestick, a wine bottle with an artistic label, a CD cover. People like to touch things. Seeing audience members’ faces light up or scrunch up inquisitively at the tactile sensation will help you connect with their humanity and realize that they are just curious folk who want to learn from you.
• Body Preparation: Before your presentation, take a field trip to the event location, if possible. Sit in the chair or stand at the podium. Absorb the space. Do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Breathe in the air.
  • Feel Your Props: Take a professional-looking folder containing your presentation outline in a readable font, other mental prompts you need, and a non-distracting writing instrument to the event site. Practice opening and closing the folder on the podium a few times.
  • Practice with the Technology in Advance: If you plan to use a PowerPoint or any audio-visual equipment, do a dry-run boot-up during your scouting mission. Does the computer require a password or a few minutes to boot up? Do you need to bring your own laptop or flash drive? What if the Internet doesn’t work? Do you know how to dim the lights? Do you need a microphone? If the equipment bothers you, do you know how to turn it off? Are there a telephone and an emergency hotline in case you need to call the IT team?
  • Have a Backup Plan in Case of Technology Failure: In my Tuesday Faculty Workshop discussed in Chapter 7, my PowerPoint failed. What a relief that I had a backup plan. I had two backup plans. When the technology crashed, I cracked a joke (with IT guys hovering over me) and kept going with my printed hard-copy notes in hand. Prepare a backup plan and a transitional joke!
  • Plan for Technical Interruptions: No matter how prepared you are, there might be an interruption, or two. People will arrive late. Cell phones will gyrate. Fire alarms or sirens might wail. The power might fail. None of these events are your fault and you cannot control them. All you can dictate is how you respond to them. Make a joke (have one prepared; mine is “Leave it to someone with public speaking anxiety to have a power failure during a speech!”) and keep going if you can. Or if you need to stop (e.g., if firefighters appear, or emergency personnel are ordering you to evacuate), just stop. It’s the universe saying, “Nice job, soldier! One more exposure event accomplished!”
• Mind Preparation: Because it is distinct from a Socratic dialogue or oral argument, a law school presentation is a wonderful opportunity to experiment with your quiet strengths on this “just be it” journey. You have control over the content and the delivery. Capitalize on your research and writing skills and creativity. Instead of trying to be like everyone else, this is a chance to be 100% you: in subject matter, examples, visuals, and delivery. You likely will know more about this topic than anyone in the room. Let your passion and innovation shine. Review your mental taglines.
• Game Day:
  • Attire: Wear something that makes you feel like a rock star (but is still legal-esque). Suits do not make me feel powerful; they suffocate me. I prefer a bright-colored yet tasteful power dress that somehow cloaks me in Superhero strength, and shoes that make me feel tall. Find something appropriate that makes you feel fantastic for your own reasons: a tie, a shirt, a dress, a skirt, a suit, a piece of jewelry, or a killer pair of power shoes.

• Word of Caution: Not everyone is going to agree with, understand, or relate to your fashion choices, especially in the legal world (not exactly known for its couture). One of my A+ legal writing students was nervous about her oral argument, although impeccably substantively prepared. She wore a pair of stylish and sophisticated high-heeled shoes to the argument and gracefully delivered a stunning line of reasoning. A male attorney sat on our judges’ panel, completely ignored the substance of her argument, and during the feedback portion, criticized her shoes. Sexist, yes. Realistic, also yes. Nonetheless, in my opinion, our exposure agenda is all about getting through each experience, coming out the other side, and building our authentic lawyer personas through each success so eventually we can go out and stun the world. Thus, I strongly feel that WHATEVER personally authentic tools work to power you through these incremental learning experiences, use them. You can make adjustments later, for the office and the courtroom. For now, wear the shoes.

• On game day, slow-walk to the classroom, and take five deep breaths before entering, balancing your stance and opening your frame to get that oxygen, blood, and energy flowing constructively. As you sit and await the commencement of your presentation, continue recalibrating, breathing, and reminding yourself of your new taglines.
• Stand When You Can: When offered the option to sit or stand in a presentation, I once believed sitting would feel safer; behind a desk or a conference room table, I felt less visible. But through my introversion journey, I learned that the physical act of standing better channels my nervous energy. Instead of energy bouncing around inside me, increasing my agitation, it flows outward through my appendages when I stand. Google the lyrics to the R.E.M. song, “Stand,” and watch the music video. In preparation, do the movements! In the real exposure moment, stand. Balance your stance. Use the podium as an energy recipient, and hang onto it (gently) sending all that excess energy into it. Standing also helps with voice projection. Preach to the populace poised to hear what you have to say!

Law School Oral Argument⁴⁰⁹

• Brain Preparation: When preparing for oral arguments, we sometimes get ahead of ourselves and jump to worrying about the judges’ questions without first thinking through and crafting the arc of an uninterrupted argument. Understandably, the anticipation of the judges’ questions is the most nerve-wracking part of oral arguments for introverted, shy, and socially anxious students, as the pattern and subject matter of the queries may seem unpredictable and their timing can interrupt the argument’s flow. However, strategic preparation can arm us with the right tools to stay in control during those moments when it seems that we are being pulled away from our plan. Start by using your brief (and your opponent’s brief, if available) to outline the substance of an unimpeded argument. Follow your professor’s instructions for drafting a “roadmap” introduction. Mine entails something like this: “May it please the court, my name is _________ and I represent________. This case concerns [insert case theme]. The issue before the court today is __________. The rule governing this issue is _______. We respectfully submit that ____ should prevail for three reasons. First, … Second, … Third, … Accordingly, we ask the court to ______.” Use the headings from your brief to identify three (to five) key points to frame the reasons why your client should prevail. Identify the specific result requested of the court. Next, you can flesh out the rest of the argument outline, weaving in facts and case law to support each key point. Then, craft an engaging conclusion, perhaps reiterating the case theme you introduced in the roadmap. After you have written out the entire argument from start to finish (ideally by hand first, to start making those brain-body-mind connections), set it aside, and then use the brief(s) to anticipate judges’ questions. In planning for questions, focus on addressing the perceived weaknesses of your client’s case. Write out possible answers to judges’ questions about those weaknesses. Create two documents in preparation of handling the judges’ questions: (1) a case “prompt sheet” with case summaries (in alphabetical order) of the name, citation, jurisdiction, date, facts, holding, and rationale of the key cases cited in both sides’ briefs; and (2) a judges’ question “prompt sheet” with one- or two-word prompts like “Public Policy” or “Rule Exception” (in alphabetical order, for ready access) and your draft responses. Next, step away from your “prompt sheets” and go back to your written argument. Rewrite the argument in outline form, further creating links between the ideas in your brain, the words on the page, and the concepts in your memory for faster retrieval in the performance moment. Read all your prep materials aloud a few times, to further solidify the links between your brain, words, and voice.
  • Additional Brain Prep: Who will the judges be? Try to find out in advance who comprises your judges panel. Are they 2L or 3L students? Alumni? School administrators? Professors? Will they wear robes (an added air of formality)? Where will the judges sit? Do you know the judges’ personalities or questioning style? Are you familiar with your opponent? Do you know your opponent’s personality or argument style?
  • Rebuttal: Find out in advance whether you or your opponent will argue first. If you are the initial arguer and plan to reserve a few minutes for rebuttal to your opponent’s argument, you’ll need to quickly scribble notes while your opponent is speaking. Many reticent advocates experience such joy and relief when they complete their initial argument and retreat to their chairs that they forget to listen to their opponents. Instead, resolve to focus, use your quiet active listening skills, and extract two or three points raised in your opponent’s argument that warrant a rejoinder. In advance, however, you certainly can anticipate and prepare rebuttal points; by drafting your brief and reading your opponent’s brief (if allowed), you will know the weaknesses of your client’s position and the strengths of your opponent’s. Prepare a rebuttal outline that lists your opponent’s strongest arguments, write out responses or counter-arguments, and then, during your opponent’s argument, plan to use that piece of paper as a guide, circling the two or three issues that most merit a response.
• Body Preparation: If possible, find out in advance where the argument will take place: In a classroom? In a conference room? In a mock or real courtroom? Go there and absorb the space. Is there a podium? A microphone? A platform for your written materials? How large is the room? What is the distance between you and the judges? Where will you sit while you await your argument?
  • Prepare your props and get comfortable using them. Create a professional-looking easy-to-maneuver folder containing your substantive preparation items: (1) the argument outline in large enough font that you can see it without having to squint; (2) the case “prompt sheet”; (3) the judges’ question “prompt sheet”; and (4) a rebuttal sheet (if applicable to you). Consider attaching the argument outline to the inside flaps of the folder, and appending the case and question sheets to the two outer parts of the folder. During the argument, you can gently open and close the folder to retrieve the information you need without distracting paper shuffling. Plan on taking a writing instrument to the argument that you will not be tempted to click or twirl; you will need a pen, pencil, or highlighter to mark your spot in the outline when you are interrupted by a judge’s question, so after responding, you can smoothly return to the flow of your argument.
• Mind Preparation: Remember, this experience occupies only 10 or 15 minutes of your life. You certainly have endured many things more annoying, stressful, or painful in your life for a longer period of time and have come through the other side. Just 10 or 15 minutes. And the time will zoom by. Judges will interrupt you—and their questions will absorb seconds and minutes of your allotted time. If you are the initial arguer, you might reserve two minutes for rebuttal, which means the first foray is even shorter. You can do this.
  • Use Your Notes: Some mentors, teachers, and public speaking gurus advise orators not to depend on written notes, declaring, “The most effective speakers memorize!” Yes, we know. But we also know that that such advice often does not work for us introverted, shy, or anxious folks. Our nerves kick in, our minds shift into overdrive as we process multiple bytes of information at once, our bodies go into protective mode, and sometimes we lose our trains of thought. Remember, the goal in the exposure agenda is not to win oratory awards (although, I will tell you that many of my incredibly nervous students have been so substantively, mentally, and physically prepared, and worked so hard to model strength in the moment, they ultimately were selected for moot court or trial teams without even setting out to do so!). Your primary objective for purposes of this “just be it” journey is to navigate the event with the least amount of anxiety possible, and learn from the incremental experience. Your first (or second, or third) oral argument does not need to be, and probably will not be, perfect. Get through it. When the nerves hit, guess what? You might need to read your “roadmap” introduction, to keep yourself talking. That’s why you took the time to write it down. And because you wrote it out, read it over, and probably edited it numerous times, it is already perfect. So, plan to take a deep breath, balance your stance, make eye contact. You might even write these physical steps into your outline: (1) approach podium; (2) arrange folder; (3) balance stance; (4) take a deep breath; (5) make eye contact with judges; (6) wait for judge (or bailiff, if any) to announce the case or somehow indicate it is time to start; (7) take another deep breath, and … recite the first line of the roadmap introduction, “May it please the court, my name is …” Gaze up periodically, forge eye contact with a judge or two, and soldier ahead … Breathe, balance your stance, and continue powering through the experience.
  • Intermittent Missteps: You might stumble on your words. Your next thought might evaporate into the ether. So what. Normal and human. Keep going. Look at the judges, hopefully find a friendly nodder or smiler (and if not, imagine one), pause, find your place, and keep going. Pausing is your friend. Who cares if you have 5–10 seconds of silence? Find your place, take a breath, balance your stance, and keep going.
  • Judges’ Questions: The judges are going to interrupt you. Try to focus on the judges as human beings. Some law school oral argument judges enjoy the opportunity to step away from their normal daily routine, don a robe, be referred to as “Justice,” and play the role of questioner. While the robes, the name placards, the time cards, and the air of authority can seem intimidating, stick to your plan and remember that the judges are just people: facilitators in a short exposure event on your “just be it” journey. Your whole part in this experience will take 10 or 15 minutes, maximum. The more the judges talk, the less you do. Welcome judges’ queries and interruptions because you already anticipated this eventuality. You invested the time to craft your judges’ questions “prompt sheet.” Reap the benefits of it. Now, when a judge poses a question you do not understand, or to which you are unsure how to respond, you have several options. If your misunderstanding stems from simply an “inartfully” phrased or compound question (which happens all the time in law school oral arguments), you could offer, “I apologize, Your Honor, I’m not sure I understand the question. Could you please repeat it?” An empathic judge will rephrase it more clearly or break it down. Or, to respond to a question of which you are not 100% sure of the answer, you could invoke your “themes,” stating, “Your Honor, it seems the court is focusing on [insert a key term/rule/policy]. That is a pivotal point here because … [insert discussion of the theme of your case.]” If the judge is not quelled, he or she will ask another question. Apply the same techniques for each question and forge onward. After you respond to each question the best you can, return to your marked spot in your argument outline, and trudge ahead. You do not need to await a signal from the judge to continue each time you finish answering a question. Monitor your allotted time, and endeavor to address your 3–5 primary arguments before time expires.
  • Momentary Pausing: Give yourself permission to pause briefly to collect your thoughts before you shift to a new issue, or to ponder before you react to a judge’s query. Use the pause to breathe.
  • Dialogue: When nerves creep in, remind yourself that this is not a performance; it is a dialogue with three humans. “Your Honor, yes, that is true because …” “Your Honor, no, I respectfully disagree because …”
  • Review your new mental taglines.
• Game Day:
  • Attire: (see Law School Presentation advice above).
  • On game day, find a quiet place to do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. During oral argument season, there tends to be a lot of nervous energy floating around the law school; be cognizant of whether other students’ energy is affecting yours, and if so, find a place where you can be alone before your argument. Slow-walk to the argument location, and take five deep breaths before entering, balancing your stance and opening your frame to get that oxygen, blood, and energy flowing constructively. As you sit and await the commencement of your argument, continue rebalancing, breathing, and reminding yourself of your new taglines.
  • As you take the podium, balance, breathe, pause, make eye contact, wait for the signal to begin, and then project that voice. Speak your opening sentence, even if you have to read it: “Your Honors, may it please the court, my name is ___, and I represent ____.” If the nerves sneak in, recalibrate your stance, and remind yourself that this is just 10 or 15 minutes of your life. You have prepared. You have something to say. Say it in your way.
  • If you are delivering a rebuttal after your opponent’s argument, use your rebuttal outline while your opponent is speaking to identify two or three points to assert in response. During your reserved rebuttal time, stand up, take the podium, balance your stance, breathe, make eye contact with the judges, wait for the signal to begin, and deliver your first line (even if you have to read it): “Your Honors, there are two/three points I will address on rebuttal. First, …”
  • At the end, say thank you. Breathe. And then smile. Shake your opponent’s hand. That is one of the hardest exposures you will do as a law student. And you did it!

Job Interview

Job interviews for legal employment can be stressful for introverted, shy, and socially anxious law students and lawyers because of our perception that law offices seek extroverted, confident, smooth speakers. Plus, the interview process is inherently judgment-oriented. Nonetheless, with the right advance research and focused strategy, we can shine in this type of one-on-one encounter.

• Brain Preparation: Before the interview, research the legal employer and, if possible, the interviewers. Find out the logistics of the interview in advance: With how many people are you interviewing? Are they junior or senior attorneys, or both? Will you be eating lunch with them as well? How long will the interview day be? Make a list of substantive questions and write them out; then, type them up. Avoid questions that can be answered through simple research, but instead consider questions about the substance of the work you would be doing in the law office. On what types of cases or transactions do the junior attorneys typically work? What types of tasks do they perform? Research and writing? Do the junior attorneys perform document reviews? Interact with clients? Conduct client interviews? Depositions? Do the junior attorneys work on several legal matters at the same time? How long do the cases typically take to go to trial? How long does it typically take to negotiate and execute a transactional agreement for a client? In what jurisdiction do most of the law office’s client matters take place? What types of research and writing projects do junior associates typically perform? Find out where the interviewers went to school, how long they have been practicing law, what type of clients they represent. Reread your résumé. Highlight three to five interesting aspects of your résumé you could discuss if asked an open-ended question, such as “What should I know about you?” Reread your writing sample, and remind yourself of the facts, the legal issue, the governing rule, and the arguments—in case the interviewer asks you about the substance. Before the interview day, read your list of questions aloud a few times, forging those brain-words-voice-memory links.
• Body Preparation: Find out in advance where and when the interview will take place. Consider taking a field trip to the office location so you can anticipate transportation, traffic, parking, or building security glitches. Plan your attire: wear a business suit. Organize your physical props in a professional-looking folder: extra copies of your résumé and writing sample, names of the interviewers if provided, your list of questions, an extra legal pad, and a pen. You also might need to bring identification to gain access to the office building. Practice your balanced seated stance.
• Mind Preparation: Focus on reality, not catastrophe. Sometimes we build up interviews in our mind as our one and only opportunity in our entire lifetime to gain employment! This interview is just a single conversation between you and one or more human being(s) in hopes of a mutual fit. You know the subject matter of the conversation better than anyone: YOU! All you have to do is exhibit genuine interest in the people you meet and what they do for a living, through asking thoughtful questions and answering queries about yourself, your legal (and probably other) interests, and your abilities. This is not the time to talk about what the law office can do for you and your career; instead, focus on all the amazing things you can do for the lawyers interviewing you, based on your strengths of active listening, deep thinking, researching, and writing. Try to regard the people you meet not as intimidating authority figures dangling a salary and future financial stability before you, but as busy human beings whose jobs you can make easier through hard work and dedication. Review your new taglines: you have an immense amount of impact to offer the legal profession. This is just one of many opportunities to find the right fit. Be your strong self.
• Game Day: Travel to the interview location early so you are not stressed about transportation, traffic, parking, or building security issues. Find a quiet place and do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Slow-walk to the interview venue. Adopt a balanced seated stance while you await your first interviewer. Breathe. Invoke your taglines. When the first interviewer greets you, smile, shake hands firmly, and make great eye contact. Start by thanking the interviewer for taking the time to meet with you, and try to forge an immediate connection by mentioning an aspect of his/her life, education, or practice that you noticed during your advance research. When you sit in the interview chair, adopt your balanced seated stance and breathe. Smile and make eye contact again. Hopefully the interviewer will guide the meeting with questions that you can answer conversationally, but if not, step into the dialogue by asking your questions. Use your notes. Listen to the responses; take notes (on paper), which might spark follow-up questions. Be yourself. At the end of each individual interview, smile, shake hands, make eye contact, and say thank you again. Use your writing to amplify your voice through follow-up thank you emails or handwritten notes.

ADVICE FOR LAW PRACTICE SCENARIOS

Law Office Meeting with a Supervising Attorney

I’ve worked with numerous law firm partners in the tough construction law industry. A few of them have not been nice people. Others have been wonderful, caring mentors. Many of them have been intimidating to some degree, because of their status, intellect, quick minds, experience, temper, physicality, gruffness, or short attention span. As a junior associate, my one-on-one meetings with some partners were fraught with anxiety. Here’s some advice on how to handle these encounters as an authentic quiet lawyer.

• Consider two different exposure scenarios with a supervising attorney: One you control, and one you do not. In the first, make a 10-minute appointment with a busy attorney to “get clarity on a few issues before moving forward with an assignment.” In the latter, you might be called without notice into the supervising attorney’s office to report results on an assignment or case. Either way, the preparation is somewhat similar.
• Brain Preparation:
  • If you scheduled the meeting, prepare an agenda, and write it down on a legal pad—not on a computer. No matter how cool the gadget or technology-friendly your office is, I do not recommend relying on an electronic device for this conversation. Busy supervising attorneys understandably can get annoyed if they have to wait for your technology to boot up. Plus, you’re probably going to need to write a few things down quickly. It’s important to maintain eye contact as much as possible while conversing and taking notes. Use pen and paper. Construct four or five specific well-phrased genuine questions about the assignment, such as:

• “I have exhausted my research in our jurisdiction. Would it be OK to broaden my search for analogous cases in other jurisdictions, or should I stick with X law?”
• “I have completed my research and analysis. Would you prefer a full analytical memorandum or a bullet-point set of talking points for your meeting with the client?”
• “I feel I have a good handle on the law but wanted to cross-check the elements of the rules against the facts. Can I review the issue file on X and incorporate additional facts into my analysis, or would you rather I stick to the universe of facts you originally gave me?”
• “The weakness of our client’s case is X. However, I came across a potential counter-argument in one of the cases. Can I go ahead and research that angle further, or would you prefer I stick with the assignment you gave me?”
• Write out your questions and read them aloud so your brain takes ownership of the words.

• If the lawyer called you into the office, brainstorm a quick agenda around the subject matter of your assignment:

• Facts (perhaps Strengths and Weaknesses)
• Legal Issue
• Rule
• Favorable Case Law or Strengths
• Unfavorable Case Law or Weaknesses
• Proposed Solutions or Next Steps

• Body Preparation: If possible, find out in advance what the attorney’s office looks like. Do a scouting mission when he or she is not in the room. Determine how the seating is arranged, how cluttered or clean the space is, what items are on the desk or the walls. Learn whether you need to go through the lawyer’s assistant to book an appointment, or whether you can e mail the attorney directly to schedule a time to talk for 10 minutes. Think about what you will carry into the room (definitely bring a legal pad and a pen, and your outline or list of questions), where you will sit, and what the first sentence out of your mouth will be. Envision adopting your balanced seated stance in the room.
• Mind Preparation: No matter how intimidating the supervising attorney seems (and hopefully you will be dealing with a nice, smart, kind, good listener bent on serving as a mentor), that lawyer is human and has personal strengths and weaknesses. Use that great trait of empathy that introverted, shy, and socially anxious individuals offer. Think about the attorney as a human being—with stressors, relationship challenges, life balance issues, financial pressures, and maybe even emotional or physical pains. Any potential gruffness or curtness has nothing to do with you. Model empathy and view your role as trying to make that lawyer’s job easier just for 10 minutes, an hour, a day, or a week. Go in there, do your job, be the best authentic lawyer you can be, say thank you, and get out. You are not there to be his or her best friend. You are there to develop as a lawyer and do the best job for your client. Prepare by reviewing your new taglines.
• Game Day: On game day, find a quiet place to do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Slow-walk to the supervising attorney’s office, and take five deep breaths before entering, balancing your stance and opening your frame to get that oxygen, blood, and energy flowing constructively. As you sit down, rebalance, breathe, and remind yourself of your mental taglines. Ask your questions. Take notes on the answers. Answer any questions posed the best you can. When you answer, make eye contact. If you do not know the answer to a question, say, “I need to investigate that and I will get back to you by tonight.” Do not fake an answer, although you could say, “I believe the answer is ____ but I need to investigate and confirm that and will get back to you tonight.” Once the questioning ends and you have your questions answered, do not linger. You are a busy worker too. Say thank you, give a timeline for your next steps, and leave.

Law Office Group Meeting

Law office group meetings can be challenging for introverted, shy, or socially anxious lawyers because often the room seems to have an extrovert-to-introvert ratio slanted in favor of the “Es.” Through strategic preparation, you can make an impactful imprint in each meeting.

• Brain Preparation: Do not just walk into the room with a blank legal pad and a pen (and again, resist bringing a laptop unless you absolutely know the meeting leader will ask you to access something on it). Instead, think in advance about the subject matter of the meeting and your role in it. Plan an agenda of items that you could discuss or volunteer. Write out the agenda with bullet points about the status of each item, or strengths, weaknesses, or concerns relevant for discussion. Under no circumstances do you need to talk for the sake of talking. However, you probably do have something pertinent to contribute about the client matter, so prepare at least one or more soundbites—write them out and have them ready. In meetings, if I have something to say but feel anxious about saying it, I write … it … out. I glance down at my scrawl and use that script to get the words off the paper, back into my head, and out of my mouth when my brain starts to do its fuzzy thing … Remember, we are good writers, so it is a smart move to use our gift of writing to bolster our speaking. Before the meeting, read your notes aloud a few times to connect your thoughts to the written words to your voice.
• Body Preparation: Go check out all the conference rooms where these meetings might take place. Know the seating configuration and decide in advance where you want to sit. Personally, I like to be near the end of a table, but not at the end (the meeting leader likely will sit at the end, so if that is not you, leave that seat empty). In exercise classes, I choose bikes, equipment, or mats in the front and closest to a wall, to minimize the number of people in my personal space but still connect to the teacher. In conference rooms, I prefer the corner of a rectangular table or the side-end of an oval one. Sit near the leader if you can—being seen taking notes and nodding sometimes can be as effective as speaking, and infinitely more valuable than talking just for the sake of talking. As much as you might want to hide, sit near the leader and be seen. Practice your balanced seated stance in the meeting room chairs.
• Mind Preparation: Remember that we introverted, shy, and socially anxious people process information, interact with others, and gain energy in disparate ways from extroverts. The extroverts in the law office conference room (and the not yet self-aware introverts) might never have studied themselves or others as deeply as you are; they are behaving in their everyday normal state. We cannot control them. We can control how we react to them. They might agitate us and stress us out, but it’s probably (hopefully) not intentional. Therefore, it’s up to us to focus on our strengths, recognize the automatic reflexes (mental and physical) that bring us discomfort in a meeting, notice them, recalibrate, and stick to our plans. We do not need to change who we are to be successful in a meeting. We can tweak how we react to our innate responses, corralling our thoughts, energy, blood flow, and oxygen in a positive direction.
  • Handling Tough Personalities in Meetings: In one of my law firm jobs, I attended team meetings led by a partner—a smart, emotionally abusive, un-self-aware introvert who spent at least 10 hours a day in the office forcing a combative extrovert persona. In meetings, he simply would not look me in the eye. He dictated assignments and engaged in conversation with others at the table, but not me. I used to take it personally and worry he considered me useless or incompetent, although occasionally he would backhandedly compliment my writing in front of the team and he often assigned me the most complex briefs to write. I never figured out what his problem was/is, but one day I realized: it’s completely not my problem. I took detailed notes during each team strategy meeting, and endeavored to ask one intelligent clarifying question—directed to the group, not to him—before the meeting ended, in an assertive voice: “Have we received any follow-up from the experts about the timing of their report drafts?” “Are we planning to run a parallel deposition schedule?” “Do we have any indication from the court on when we might get a ruling on X?” Sometimes, I left the meeting saying nothing, and that was fine too.
• Game Day: Before you enter the meeting room, do an Amy Cuddy power pose in your office for two minutes. Plan on getting to the meeting room a few minutes early to choose the seat you want. Slow-walk to the meeting room, breathing intentionally. When you arrive at the room, choose your seat, sit down, adopt a balanced stance, shift your shoulders back, and breathe. Make eye contact with meeting participants as they enter the room: be seen. Use the strategies described above to participate, and when the meeting ends, look the leader in the eye, say thank you, and leave with purpose.

Conference Call

For introverted, shy, and socially anxious individuals, law-related conference calls can be the pits. Several loud, confident, assertive lawyers interrupting one another through crackling speakerphones, cell phone signals fading in and out, and background noise injecting additional interference? It is enough to make every introvert sigh, grit teeth, and mutter, “Why can’t we just do this over email?” Nonetheless, we shall overcome.

• Brain Preparation: If you are the conference call leader, that’s the best-case scenario. Draft an agenda and run the show; circulate the agenda in advance, establish a start time and a hard stop, and then plan to walk through each point seriatim on the phone call. If you are a participant, you can plan to settle in first by listening and letting the others battle it out while you get your bearings; just know that there will rarely, if ever, be a lull for you to interject your voice. If you have something to say, unfortunately you are going to have to interrupt someone. Write out in advance what you want to say. If you know others on the call will dispute your points, have your counter points written out, and plan to simply read them. No one will be able to see you. You can stand up and read away. Before the conference call, read your preparatory notes aloud a few times, connecting your ideas to your voice.
• Body Preparation: Because no one can see you on a conference call (unless obviously someone else is in the room with you), the technical/physical preparation for this exposure event is less rigorous. I recommend conducting all conference calls on a landline rather than a cell phone. On a landline, there is less of a likelihood of you getting dropped from the call, which can add unnecessary stress to the event. Use the speakerphone and mute buttons if needed so you have more flexibility to stand up and the freedom to flip through your notes/script. In case you get dropped from the call, have the numbers handy to rejoin the conference, and plan to state your name again loudly when you rejoin, even if you are interrupting someone. You can say, “Hi all, this is ____. I was dropped from the call but I’m back on.”
• Mind Preparation: Prepare yourself that the call might not be fun, but flip the dread into an affirming message: “This is a low stakes experiment because no one can see me.” “I can write out my script, stand up, and read verbatim.” Review your mental taglines.
• Game Day: Stand up in your office before the call and do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Stand up throughout the call and move around, letting your excess energy dissipate outside your body. If you have something to say, knowing that you are going to have to interrupt someone, stand up or stay standing and project your voice. If someone is still talking, keep talking. Someone will back down, and try not to let it be you. Get your voice on the record. Say your name to remind your audience who is speaking: “Hi everyone, this is ___. On the point about X, we need to make sure we’ve considered the issue of insurance.” If someone is disputing something you wrote in a letter or in a draft of an agreement, step right in and say, “Hi everyone, this is ____. On the contract indemnity provision, the reasons why the language needs to be adjusted are: (1) …, (2) …, and (3) …” Get on the record. Take notes throughout the call. At the end of the call, before everyone hangs up, you could interject one more time, use your notes, and say, “Everyone, this is ____ again. Just to wrap up, we discussed that our next three steps will be: (1) …, (2) …, and (3) … Did I leave anything out?” If appropriate for the context of the call, use the written word as your voice and circulate a recap email to the conference call participants.

Negotiation

Negotiation involves two or more lawyers discussing points of a deal and hopefully coming to terms on a final agreement, through give-and-take, points and counterpoints, bargaining, and perhaps compromise. As a junior associate, I thought I had to pretend to be tough, intense, or demanding in every face-to-face negotiation. I was wrong. Once I realized that my strength really lay in being thoughtful, calm, well-prepared, and measured, negotiations started going my way.

• Brain Preparation: To prepare substantively for a negotiation, outline all the key objectives you aspire to achieve for the client, with itemized reasons why you believe the client is entitled to each one—based on applicable law, facts, and/or policy. Craft a confidential list of bargaining ranges and/or alternate positions on each point, prioritizing agenda items from most important to least critical to the client (or vice versa). For an anxious attorney, a key step in preparing for a potentially challenging negotiation is to write out the valid reasons why your client is entitled to each deal point sought. Introverted, shy, and socially anxious lawyers struggle with arguing for the sake of arguing, or posturing, or digging in—without a genuine straight-faced justification for the client’s position. We do not like to be inauthentic, and bluffing makes us feel fraudulent. You have valid legal, factual, and policy bases for your contentions; write them down. Before the negotiation, read your notes aloud a few times to shape those links between ideas, words, and voice. Also, use your writing skills to amplify your voice; offer to take the lead on drafting the first version of the agreement for use as a starting point in the negotiation.
• Body Preparation: In advance of the event, try to see the conference room or other location where the negotiation will take place. Try to control your positioning and placement in the scene. Decide in advance where you will sit and where ideally you will direct the opposing party or parties to sit. Figure out which side or end of the table makes you the most/least comfortable. Get a sense of the glare from the windows, the overhead lighting, the doorway, and access to electrical outlets. Plan in advance which props and prompts you will take into the room: outlines, notebooks, legal pads, backup documentation, etc. Practice your balanced seated stance.
• Mind Preparation: Envision yourself in charge of the room. This is your negotiation. Even if it is not taking place in your office, consider the other side’s team to be your invited guests. Advance preparation will help you stay in control. Be your quiet, calm, measured self. You have negotiation talking points to support you if you feel shaky. Stick to the plan. If an opposing lawyer raises his voice or becomes combative or antagonistic, let him stomp his feet, or jump up and down. You do not need to react or respond. He is a human being and perhaps having a bad day. Or perhaps this is his usual mode of communication or the tack he believes he needs to take in a negotiation. Not your problem. You don’t need to mirror his acts or tone. You have a job to do and you are doing it—your way. Calm, measured, thoughtful. Be yourself. Give yourself permission to read from your script. This is not a show or a performance. Get your points across. If the other side does not agree with your substantive approach in a negotiation, you might walk away without a final agreement that day. So what. There will be another day. Stick to the plan, and do the best you can. You cannot control other people in the room. You are getting through it being your best, authentic, quiet, calm self. To prepare, review your mental taglines.
• Game Day: Get to the site early and decide where you will sit. Organize and arrange your materials, and then find a quiet space for a few minutes. Do an Amy Cuddy power pose, and breathe. Before the negotiation starts, take your seat, balance your stance, shift your shoulders back, breathe, and remind yourself of your taglines. Use your good negotiation outline to step into the conversation. Make eye contact. Smile. The outline and your calm, measured persona will help you deal with any disruptions or arguments. Use your outline to respond steadily to challenges from other lawyers. If they will not budge or they invite debate, repeat your points. Assert yourself as the participant who will capture the interim agreements in writing; consider using a white board or overhead screen to identify such incremental mutual decisions and pare down remaining differences in position, showing the two sides. If a final agreement cannot be reached at the meeting, you might just need to (check with your client and then) walk away for the day. At the end of the event, shake hands, make eye contact, say thank you, smile, and leave.

Deposition

In a deposition, a lawyer questions a witness under oath in the presence of a court reporter, with a defending attorney objecting to questions he or she believes are improperly phrased or that encroach on applicable privileges or other protections. Client representatives and more than one lawyer might be present in a deposition. Deposition dynamics can be stressful for quiet folks because of frequent interruptions to the flow of the dialogue between the deposing attorney and the deponent by objections, which also sometimes devolve into debate. Here is some advice on how to stay calm and controlled throughout the arc of a deposition.

• Brain Preparation: As the deposing attorney, you best can control the dynamic in the room by investing significant time in preparing a deposition outline. Review the case pleadings and documentary record, consider your client’s “theory” or “theme” of the case, and draft a deposition outline of questions, topics, and documents to explore with the witness. Write out a series of introductory questions to delve into the deponent’s background and experience, leaving space beneath each question to take notes, which might spark follow-up questions. You can use your introductory questions as a script as you begin the deposition, catching your breath, calming your heart rate, and easing into a rhythm of conversation with the deponent. Who cares if it sounds robotic at first? The transcript generated by the court reporter only shows the words on the page—there is no annotation of, “Oooh, the lawyer is reading robotically from a script.” You can read all you want, at first, balancing intermittent eye contact with the deponent to establish a rapport. Eventually, in your outline, transition from the introductory questions to legal substance, exploring case-relevant topics, issues, themes, and exhibits. Plan enough questions and topics so your outline can serve as a roadmap during the deposition if tense moments ensue or you simply become tired and are not sure what issue to tackle next. After you complete your deposition outline, read the first several pages aloud a few times, getting your brain and voice accustomed to the words on the page.
  • Defending a Deposition: Senior attorneys and law office supervisors often assign junior attorneys the task of defending depositions. Defending a deposition means that you accompany a deponent—the client or witness being deposed—to the deposition, sit next to him or her, and interject objections to questions posed by the deposing attorney that are improperly formed or infringe upon the attorney-client privilege or other confidentiality protections. This might sound like an easier task than serving as the deposing attorney, but for quiet lawyers, defending a deposition can present a greater challenge. In that role, we must think on our feet more, interrupt the other players’ conversation with objections, and extemporaneously debate the propriety of such objections. Nonetheless, with the following strategic preparation, we can excel as defending attorneys: (1) have a list of standard evidentiary objections handy for quick reference;⁴¹⁰ (2) plan to flex your active listening skills and pay attention to the wording of the deposing attorney’s questions; (3) instruct your deponent in advance that when you lift your hand off the table, he or she should stop talking or wait to answer a pending question, creating a natural pause for you to state your objection on the court reporter’s record without competing voices interrupting each other. Typically, unless the deposing attorney asks questions that infringe upon the attorney-client privilege or some other confidentiality protection, you simply will be objecting to the form of the question: “Objection: Asked and answered. Objection: Compound question. Objection: Vague.” You will not need to, or really be allowed to, engage in long-winded “speaking objections,” elaborating on your reasons. Plan to tackle the deposition this way: If you hear an objectionable question, lift your hand off the table to signal to your deponent to stay quiet or stop talking; then, say “Objection: Calls for speculation” or some other appropriate objection from your printed list. You might assert more than one objection at the same time: “Objection: Compound question; vague.” Plan to ask for breaks when you or the deponent need them, so you can stay alert and focused.
• Body Preparation: In advance of the event, try to see the conference room or other location where the deposition will take place. Try to control your positioning and placement in the scene. Decide in advance where you will sit and where ideally you will direct the witness and other attorneys to sit. Usually, the court reporter sits at the end of the table, the deposing attorney sits next to the court reporter on one side, and the deponent and the defending attorney sit on the other. Figure out which side of the table makes you the most/least comfortable. Get a sense of the glare from the windows, the overhead lighting, the doorway, and access to electrical outlets. Plan in advance which props and prompts you will take into the room: deposition outlines, notebooks, legal pads, boxes of documents or exhibits, tabs, etc. (If you are the defending attorney, simply bring your list of objections, a notepad, and a pen.) Practice your balanced seated stance.
• Mind Preparation: Envision yourself in charge of the room. This is your deposition. Even if it is not taking place in your office, consider the other side’s team to be your invited guests. As the deposing attorney, your outline will help you stay in control. Be your calm, measured self. If an opposing lawyer raises his voice or becomes combative or antagonistic, let him stomp his feet or jump up and down. Again, you do not need to react to it or respond to it. He is a human being and perhaps having a bad day. Or perhaps this is his normal style of handling a deposition. Not your problem. You do not need to mirror this approach. You have a job to do and you are doing it—your way. Calm, measured, thoughtful. Be yourself. As the deposing attorney, give yourself permission to read the questions from your script. This is not a show or a performance. If you cannot get all the information you need from a deposition, despite your strategic preparation and best efforts, so what. There are other forms of discovery in the case. As the defending attorney, if your witness is a bit too loquacious, do your best to object appropriately and preserve the record. Stick to the plan, and do the best you can. Remember, you cannot control other people in the room. You are getting through it being your best, authentic, calm self. Review your mental taglines in advance of the deposition.
• Game Day: Get to the deposition site early and decide where you will sit. Organize and arrange your materials, and then find a quiet space for a few minutes. Do an Amy Cuddy power pose, and breathe. Take your seat, balance your stance, shift your shoulders back, breathe, and remind yourself of your taglines. Introduce yourself to the participants, especially the court reporter (a key player in every deposition). If you are the deposing attorney, use your deposition outline to step into the conversation. Make eye contact. Smile. Ask each well-crafted question, look at the deponent, listen to his or her answer (using your good listening skills), and take notes. Use your notes as prompts for follow-up questions. The outline and your calm, measured persona will help you deal with difficult objections or interruptions. Just because opposing counsel objects to a deposition question (or many of your questions) does not necessarily mean there is anything actually wrong with your question. The lawyer could be simply preserving the record or strategically trying to interrupt your flow. You can try to rephrase the question, but if that is not working for you, just re-ask it. Break any compound questions into shorter, more concise questions addressing one topic at a time. The defending lawyer may repeat the objection; that is fine. Keep eye contact with the deponent, not the lawyer. If there is no privilege objection, simply look at the deponent after the objection and say, “If you understand the question, you may answer.” If you get rattled, replace any critical messages in your head with positive ones, and keep going. Check your outline, ask the next question, take notes, pause, listen. Take breaks. Breathe. Keep using your outline. Read from it if you have to; this is not a show. Ignore the lawyer if he or she is bugging you. Be nice and respectful to the court reporter. And the deponent. At the end of the deposition, shake hands, make eye contact, say thank you, smile, and leave.

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Some seasoned attorneys sense nervousness in new lawyers, and adopt intimidation tactics during depositions. My former law firm boss assigned me a lengthy series of depositions in New Orleans that lasted nearly a year. My gruff opposing counsel—who clearly sensed, and tried to capitalize on, my apprehension—defended his numerous witnesses while chewing on a large unlit cigar and staring me down during my questioning. During one of my depositions, he rolled a television set into the conference room so he and his fellow defending attorneys could watch a high-school baseball championship (on mute). When it was his turn to depose my witnesses, and I asserted objections to his questions, he constantly snapped, “What was wrong with that one?” It took every ounce of my resolve to stick to my plan in each encounter, asserting my questions or objections (from my outlines and list) and not backing down, even though my face burned with a persistent blush. Ultimately, the plan prevailed; I garnered important nuggets of information in each sequential deposition, which I eventually summarized in a summary judgment motion. At oral argument (handled by my boss), the judge asked opposing counsel, “Sir, you didn’t really think you were going to skate on this one, did you?” The case ended well, but that was a year of unnecessary and palpably memorable anxiety I could have gone without.

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Courtroom Appearance

The unpredictability of courtrooms can stoke anxiety in introverted, shy, and socially anxious lawyers. The environment is chock-full of stress triggers: over-stimulating chaos, crowds, bustle, authority figures, metal detectors, competition, countless situations calling out for empathy … In preparing for a courtroom experience, we must reframe the situation in our minds. We must tune out the pandemonium and prepare with singular focus—all we need to do is convey a clear message to a small but impactful audience. The advice here will focus on the oral argument experience in open court, not a full trial.

• Brain Preparation: The substantive preparation for a courtroom oral argument experience is similar to the advice provided above for a law school oral argument assignment. Now you are going to court because you want or need something for a live client, or the other side wants or needs something for its client and you are disinclined to give it to them. Oral arguments in real courtrooms move quickly; plan a simple and direct message. Write out an introduction—your name, whom you represent, the nature of the case, the specific issue before the court, the governing rule, the result you seek, and the 3–5 reasons why the judge should grant your request. Choose analogous cases and/or policy statements to support your reasoning. Develop a “theme” for your client’s position, and use that as a home base to return to if the judge’s questioning takes you down a meandering path. Write the argument out word-for-word first (ideally by hand—to supercharge those neural circuits in the brain as discussed earlier in this chapter). Then, type it up and read it aloud several times, forging chain links between your thoughts, words, and voice. Next, condense the argument to an outline containing enough information to trigger your thoughts if nerves freeze your brain in the moment. Take both your outline and the full argument to court though, just in case.
  • Judges’ Questions: Use the opposing party’s brief(s) to anticipate judges’ questions about the perceived weaknesses of your case, and write out answers to address each potential question and weakness—justifying the result you seek. Create short headings or labels to identify the topics of the anticipated questions and answers for quick retrieval during the actual argument. Read your answers aloud several times.
  • Rebuttal: After the opposing party speaks, the judge might turn back to you for a response. Try to prepare rebuttal points in advance; you will know the strengths of the opposing argument, having read the briefs and the cases. Write out some anticipated rebuttal sentences: “Your Honor, in response to counsel’s statement about the Evans case …” Read those sentences aloud several times in preparation.
• Body Preparation: The best advice I can give for logistical preparation for a real courtroom experience is: go there and watch. Invest this time and it will pay dividends you would not believe. Find out in advance when your trial judge or appellate panel is hearing oral arguments on other cases and whether the courtroom is open to the public. Research how to get there, take a legal pad and a pen, and go watch three hours of arguments. Notice the room. How many people are present? Where do the attorneys for each side sit or stand? Is there a podium? Is there a microphone? How big is the room? What is the spatial distance between the judge and the attorneys? Where will you sit until the judge calls your case? Who is assisting the judge? Is there a bailiff? A court reporter? A clerk? What is the judge’s demeanor? Write down the pattern of questions. How long does each attorney typically speak? Does the judge interrupt the speaker mid-sentence or fold questions into attorney pauses? Does the judge rule on the legal issue from the bench, or reserve decision until issuing a written opinion later? Watch the attorneys. Notice any imperfections? I bet you will see a lot of them; these are human beings simply engaged in conversation about complicated topics. Each attorney has a different style and various strengths and weaknesses. I once thought all courtroom orators would be masterful; they are not. You will feel much better about being your authentic self if you go spend three hours watching others in action.
  • Prepare Your Tools: Create a professional-looking easy-to-maneuver folder with three items: (1) the argument outline in large enough font that you can see it without having to squint; (2) a case “prompt sheet” with case summaries (in alphabetical order) of the name, citation, jurisdiction, date, facts, holding, and rationale of the key cases cited in both parties’ briefs; (3) a judges’ question “prompt sheet” with one- or two-word prompts like “Public Policy” or “Exception to Rule” (in alphabetical order) and your draft responses. Take a writing instrument that you will not be tempted to click or twirl, but that you can use to mark your place when you are interrupted by a judge’s question, and to help you seamlessly return to your argument flow. When lugging physical items to the courtroom, less is more. Do not bog yourself down with myriad documents, books, files, or binders. Pare down what you need into the easy-to-maneuver folder and practice opening and closing it as you step to the podium. Know where necessary information is located within your preparation materials.
  • Practice your balanced seated stance as you await your argument, and then your grounded standing position when you take the podium.
• Mind Preparation: Think about the argument as a conversation between you and the judge rather than a performance. You know the substantive material from writing the brief(s). If you sat in your living room on a weekend and had a casual dialogue with the judge over coffee about your client’s case, you probably would not be nervous. Remember that for introverted, shy, and socially anxious folks, it is the dynamic of the authoritarian nature of the courthouse and the pressure for spontaneous banter before an audience that spark our nerves. You have something to say, and are entitled to say it in your way. Stand your ground, use your notes, invoke your new personal taglines, and do the best job you can.
• Game Day:
  • Attire: Earlier in this chapter, I recommended that students preparing for a law school presentation or oral argument exposure event should wear something that makes them feel rock star–esque, to ignite inner power. However, when you go to court, wear a professional-looking suit. Judges expect it, and it is a sign of respect for the court. You can wear a non-distracting rock star watch or other piece of jewelry (or your favorite t-shirt emblazoned with an empowering message hidden beneath your suit!) but this is one scenario when you must sport that lawyer uniform.
  • Get to the courthouse early. Getting through security and finding the correct courtroom can be anxiety-producing. Find a quiet place and do a two-minute Amy Cuddy power pose. Choose a seat in the courtroom, adopt your balanced seated stance, and breathe. Try not to absorb the stress of what is going on around you. Look at the judge when he or she enters the courtroom: he or she is a person. You are about to engage in a short dialogue with a human being on a topic that you studied, wrote about, understand, and care about—that’s it. You did the substantive, mental, and physical preparatory work you needed to do. When it comes time for you to take the podium, walk slowly, breathe, adopt your balanced standing position, make eye contact, settle in, breathe again, smile.
  • Use Your Notes: Yes, it would be ideal if we could deliver an oral argument in open court without referring to notes, but being realistic, that often does not work for us introverted, shy, or socially anxious people, at least not in most public speaking scenarios. No worries. Let’s be our genuine selves. When the nerves hit, guess what? Read your introduction. That’s why you took the time to write it down. And because you wrote it out, read it over, and edited it numerous times, it is already perfect. It will get you talking and connecting with the judge. Take a deep breath, balance your stance, make eye contact. Write these physical steps down in your outline: (1) approach podium; (2) arrange folder; (3) balance stance; (4) take a deep breath; (5) make eye contact with judge; (6) wait for judge (or bailiff, if any) to announce the case or somehow indicate it is time to start; (7) take another deep breath, and … recite the first line of the introduction, “Your Honor, my name is … and I represent …” Gaze up periodically, forge eye contact with the judge, and soldier ahead … Breathe, balance your stance, and continue powering through the experience.
  • Intermittent Missteps: You might stumble on your words. Your next thought might disappear into the stratosphere. So what. Keep going. Look at the judge, pause when you need to, find your place in your notes, and then keep going. Take a breath, balance your stance, and keep going.
  • Judges’ Questions: The judge (or panel of judges in an appellate case) likely will interrupt you. Hopefully, he or she already devoured all the briefs and really only wants to use oral argument to ask questions and dig a bit at the weaknesses of your client’s position, to vet the strength of the court’s ultimate decision. Welcome judges’ queries and interruptions because you already anticipated this eventuality. You invested the time to craft your judges’ questions “prompt sheet.” Reap the benefits of it. When a judge poses a question you do not understand, or to which you are unsure how to respond, you have several options. Your misunderstanding could stem simply from an “inartfully” phrased or compound question—which happens all the time in legal dialogue. If so, you could offer, “I apologize, Your Honor, I’m not sure I understand the question. Could you please repeat it?” An empathic judge might rephrase it more clearly or break it down. Or, in response to a question of which you are not 100% sure of the answer, you could invoke your “themes,” stating, “Your Honor, it seems the court is focusing on [insert a key term/rule/policy]. That is a pivotal point here because … [insert discussion of the theme of your case.]” If you absolutely do not know how to answer the question, say, “Your Honor, respectfully, to be honest I need to give that question a bit more investigation but I would be happy to follow up with an answer in writing.” (Sometimes, judges may allow, or order, counsel for all parties to submit supplemental filings to clarify an issue that arises, and is not resolved, in oral argument). After you respond to each question the best you can, return to your marked spot in your argument outline, and trudge ahead. You do not need to await a signal from the judge to continue each time you finish answering a question. Monitor your allotted time, and endeavor to address your 3–5 primary arguments before time expires.
  • Pausing: Give yourself permission to pause briefly to collect your thoughts and breathe before you shift to a new issue, or to ponder before you react to a judge’s query.
  • At the end, say thank you. Breathe. And then smile. That is one of the hardest exposures you will do as an introverted, shy, or socially anxious lawyer. Shake opposing counsel’s hand, and go celebrate.

As you prepare to step into your first exposure agenda, consider this reminder from Dr. Kozak: “Introversion is a gift. Don’t be afraid to be different. Don’t be afraid to stand out … amid the wild extroverting around you.”⁴¹¹

Exercise #7

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You already thoughtfully crafted your realistic exposure agenda in Step 5. Now, let’s plan your pre-game and game-day routines.

Developing Your Pre-Game Routine

• General Endurance Training: What physical exercise do you already, or can you begin to, engage in to build your physical strength and stamina to carry you through your exposure agenda? Even if exercise is not (yet) your favorite activity, consider one type of daily or weekly movement that will add a spring to your step, strengthen your frame, and give you that extra spark of swagger when you step into tough law-related exposure moments.
• Brain Pre-Game:
  • What substantive preparation is necessary for your first exposure event?
  • Would it be helpful to create outlines? Case charts? Lists of questions and answers?
  • Would any physical props be useful or appropriate? Handouts? Visuals?
  • Schedule time to write out notes, type them up, and read them aloud enough times to forge brain chain links between thoughts, words, and voice and enhance memory recall within the actual event.
• Body Pre-Game:
  • What adjustments can you make to your physical stance and comportment in the performance moment to channel your energy, oxygen, and blood flow in a constructive manner?
  • Can you visit the exposure event location in advance?
  • Will you be sitting or standing? Where exactly?
  • How will you best manage your documents, physical props, and any technical equipment?
  • Do you need to practice using available technology?
• Mind Pre-Game:
  • Be realistic about the stakes of the exposure event—it’s just one short experience in a long line of interactive opportunities across the arc of a lifetime legal career.
  • Be realistic about your audience and viewers—they’re just human beings. It is a dialogue, not a performance. (And not everyone around us is paying attention to us.)
  • Have you written out and reread your positive personal taglines?
  • Have you crafted any additional taglines for this particular event?
  • What will you do the night before the event to minimize anxiety?
  • What will you do the morning of the event to minimize anxiety?
  • What will you do in the half hour leading up to the event?
  • What will you do right before you enter the room?
  • Visualize the exposure event space.

• Imagine your entry into the room, and the chronological steps leading up to the moment you begin speaking.
• Anticipate the potential influx of the negative thoughts and physical responses.
• Rehearse halting the negative soundtrack and replacing it with your positive mental taglines.
• Envision physically adjusting your stance, enhancing blood, oxygen, and energy flow.

• Your goal is to make it through the event and experience the ultimate joy and relief when the anxiety subsides, knowing that you navigated the scenario authentically. Remember, perfection is dull.

Developing Your Exposure Game-Day Routine

• What will you wear to the event that will make you feel like the rock-star (yet still professional) version of you?
• What items will you take with you as substantive prompts or props?
• How early will you arrive at the event location?
• What calming physical exercise can you do a half-hour before the event? Walk around the block? Around the building?
• Can you take some alone time before you enter the room?
• Five minutes beforehand, what can you do to calm your breathing and your heartbeat?
• When you enter the room, what can you do to calm your breathing and your heartbeat? Do you talk to anyone? Or focus on an object?
• How will you situate yourself in the room?
• How will you stand/sit? Where?
• How will you adjust your physical stance as you begin the event?
• What positive internal messages will you invoke as you begin and during the event?
• How will you start speaking? What are your first spoken words?