Two

THE STRATEGY TO TAME ME

Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to be on God’s side, for God is always right.

—ABRAHAM LINCOLN

Have you seen this?” my friend, a fellow pastor, asked. He held out an image on his phone screen.

“No. What is it?” I said.

“Just take a look,” he replied solemnly.

I was in Australia, along with many other ministry leaders, to attend the annual Hillsong Conference. Invited to speak at the Hillsong City Campus in downtown Sydney, I was waiting in the greenroom backstage before the service. When I saw the photograph on my friend’s phone, I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. For a long few seconds, I was literally speechless.

It was a devastating iconic image that proudly pointed to our own choice to reject God: a nighttime photograph of the White House, home to the president of the United States of America, illuminated in rainbow-colored floodlights. The display had been assembled in celebration of the landmark US Supreme Court ruling the previous day allowing same-sex couples the legal right to marry. The picture had been taken the night before and broadcast around the world. To me, it looked like our country was thrusting its middle finger toward heaven, declaring that we, not God, knew what was best and had the right to decide.

My heart was broken.

Buffet in Babylon

That moment, as I stared at that photograph, feeling sick inside, I knew I had to write this book. The rainbow-hued image of the White House was only the latest in a string of incidents and events that played out a theme I had been observing for many years: popular culture will always try to tame us into compromise and compliance with its fast-moving trends. Culture grinds against our values until either they crumble or we stand up and counter the cultural erosion.

If we want to live a godly life in the middle of all this friction, we must determine our core convictions according to the Bible and know how to live them—before we face the weight of social pressure from the people around us. It’s always easier to resist the winds of change if your roots run deep in God’s truth.

Daniel and his friends knew this firsthand. After their Babylonian captors changed their names, their new master, Ashpenaz, did something else significant: he assigned them a portion of the king’s table. You might be tempted to think, That doesn’t sound so bad—what’s the big deal? Maybe old Ash was just being hospitable. But think again. Not only did the king’s rich food and drink violate the dietary laws of Israel, but most of it had been offered up to idols prior to being served.

 

It’s always easier to resist the winds of change if your roots run deep in God’s truth.


 

Instead of tucking in and enjoying what must have been a sumptuous meal, “Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way” (Dan. 1:8). To remain pure in body and spirit, Daniel politely refused the king’s sacrificial filet and cabernet. He asked instead if he and his friends could have veggies, grains, and water.

Daniel knew the kind of nourishment his soul needed as well as his body, and he knew how he was to live out his convictions. So when the opportunity to compromise came, he didn’t think twice.

When you know what’s in your core, you don’t struggle to decide.

Decide Before the Dilemma

Receiving new names and being invited to eat at the king’s table may, on the surface, have seemed like welcoming acts, but they were, in fact, the start of a full-scale assault on the young Jewish men and their faith, much like the broader scheme the Devil uses in our lives to convince us to compromise our standards. Using the shifting sands of culture, the Enemy tries to erode our convictions and change our behavior. If he can lure us into the forbidden, often by appealing to our sensual appetites, then he’s derailed our relationship with God and undermined our divine purpose.

 

When you know what’s in your core, you don’t struggle to decide.


 

Often the Devil’s snares are open and obvious, but that doesn’t make them less tempting. For instance, every January I join with many others from our church for three weeks of prayer and fasting, something we call the 21 Days of Prayer. Following the hectic holiday season, my New Year’s fast has become a sacred time for me to draw closer to God and seek his guidance.

And you know what? Every year, precisely during that precious time of prayer and fasting, I’m asked to speak and preach in some of the most beautiful, exotic, and amazing places in the world: tropical retreats, European conferences, Australian churches, and African missions. They’re almost always worthwhile events that normally I’d love to be a part of, and they’re almost always set in a place I either love or have always wanted to visit. But I refuse to give up what I know God wants me to do. Before those invitations come in, I make sure to block out the month of January for my most important appointment of the entire year.

The Enemy will use all kinds of enticements to pull you away from God’s plan, to lessen your impact, to try and tame you. He’ll make them seem easy and enjoyable—no big deal. Some will even seem like gifts from the Lord, blessings that look harmless to accept. But they derail you from what God actually has for you.

That’s why you have to know what you stand for before that moment comes when you’re offered that hit, that drink, that touch, that glimpse, that purchase, that taste. Pre-decide what you will do when those temptations come your way—and they definitely will come your way, often when you’re at your weakest or when your defenses are down. Settle your core convictions and use them as anchors when everything and everyone around you wants to sweep you away.

Consider King David. He wrote, “My heart is set on keeping your decrees to the very end. . . . And because I consider all your precepts right, I hate every wrong path” (Ps. 119:112, 128). He was far from perfect, but David always found his way back to God. He knew what he believed, and not even Goliath, Saul, Bathsheba, and Absalom could shake David’s faith.

Ultimately, each one of us is responsible for what we hold true within our hearts. The question is whether it’s God’s truth or man’s truth. Culture will try to convince you that there are no absolute truths. We’ll be told “it’s complicated” and that truth depends on context or a person’s individual situation. What we hold true will be questioned: that the Bible is God’s Word, that Jesus is the Son of God, that we must be born again. We will be questioned about our ministry values and challenged on our stand on social issues like marriage and family, money, and the sanctity of life.

Moral relativism is the religion of the day. If you doubt this, just consider that only 35 percent of Americans believe in moral absolutes anymore.1 This figure was cited by George Barna, whose firm conducted the research, as a major factor underlying the data he released in a controversial public presentation about the moral views and behaviors of Christians. In that forum Barna noted that substantial numbers of Christians believe that activities such as abortion, gay sex, sexual fantasies, cohabitation, drunkenness, and viewing pornography are morally acceptable.

Without some firm and compelling basis for suggesting that such acts are inappropriate, people are left with philosophies such as “if it feels good, do it,” “everyone else is doing it” or “as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else, it’s permissible.” In fact, the alarmingly fast decline of moral foundations among our young people has culminated in a one-word worldview: “whatever.” The result is a mentality that esteems pluralism, relativism, tolerance, and diversity without critical reflection of the implications of particular views and actions.2

It is absolutely possible, slowly but surely, to be led away from what God’s Word says about the hot topics of today. If we want to stand for our beliefs, especially when it’s not easy or politically correct to do so, then we must have a firm grasp of the foundation of our faith and why we hold to increasingly unpopular convictions. We must, as David did, maintain an eternal point of view as our basis of reference for the cultural changes fluctuating around us.

But our goal in knowing our core convictions is not to draw a line in the sand and create an “us vs. them” mind-set. Our goal is to build bridges and serve those in need so that they might be drawn to the love of God. No one was ever won to Christ because they lost an argument. Jesus told us to share the good news of the gospel throughout all the world (Matt. 28:16–20), and he made it clear that we were to be in the world but not of the world (John 15:18–20). He said, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35).

We have the privilege of loving others and offering them God’s truth: that we’re all sinful and in need of a Savior, which is exactly why Jesus came to live as a man and die on the cross. His sacrifice makes it possible for us all to find hope in a relationship with a holy God. Amid so many negative, destructive factors at work in our culture, we offer the good news of the gospel and have the tremendous privilege of bringing light and life to everyone around us.

The way we do this without being swallowed up by cultural forces is by anchoring ourselves to a worldview based on God’s Word. Knowing what we believe and why we believe it is foundational to our ability to be people of positive influence. Having God’s truth as our point of reference not only allows us to withstand the swirling currents of cultural change, but it also allows us to extend a lifeline of grace to others around us.

Worldview Finder

Everyone has a worldview, a way of seeing, filtering, and processing the events of their daily lives in the context of the world they live in. Basically, your worldview is the set of beliefs that you base your life on. It is the core convictions you consider when faced with decisions. It is the lens through which you view and assess the world at large.

Many factors shape your personal worldview. We all experience many of the same life events, but we see them differently. We don’t see things as they are, but as we are—through a filter of our personal experiences, relationships, observations, and conclusions. Both good and bad, these variables are often biased, inaccurate, and subject to our emotions.

 

We don’t see things as they are, but as we are.


 

This is why we have conflict and engage in arguments with each other—because everybody uses a different filter. You have your viewpoint, and I have mine. If we take five different people, each will have his or her own unique viewpoint. These people can all attend the same event but have completely different experiences and conclusions about it.

If you’ve ever been involved in a car accident, you probably realized that everyone else involved saw it happen a different way. One driver thinks it’s the other driver’s fault. The other driver thinks the accident happened because there was no stop sign at the intersection. An eyewitness thinks the collision occurred because the afternoon sun momentarily blinded one of the drivers. The officer who arrives at the scene looks at the tire marks, crumpled fender, and other evidence and reaches yet an entirely different conclusion. They’re all looking at the same event from their own personal worldviews.

Our worldviews inform how we see God, how we view ourselves, and how we regard other people. They interpret our past experiences, our present circumstances, and our future expectations. Our personal worldviews affect how we see money, sex, work, and time, and even how we view good and evil.

This filter for processing everything around us influences every choice we make. If you’ve dated frequently and been engaged a half-dozen times but never made it to the altar, then you begin to think it unlikely you’ll ever get married. Your past experiences lead you to some false conclusions: that you’re not “cut out” for marriage, that others are unreliable and untrustworthy, that relationships can’t last for more than a few months. If you allow these false beliefs to influence your attitude, then others don’t want to be around your negativity or unwillingness to trust them. You end up reinforcing these lies of the Enemy and the cycle continues.

What we believe—about ourselves, about God, about others, about the way life works—makes a direct impact on our decisions each day. Our worldviews shape the objective events we encounter into subjective experiences. But here’s the problem: our worldviews are profoundly influenced by the worldviews of others.

 

Our worldviews require truth, and if we haven’t based them on God’s Word, the ultimate truth, then our worldviews rely on false and negative contributions of the world.


 

In fact, we probably have many ingredients baked into our worldviews that we never chose consciously or deliberately. We picked them up from our surroundings, our environment, our families, and the people we’re around most frequently. Every time we listen to a song, we are exposed to its worldview. Every movie or TV show we watch represents a worldview. Every time we read a newspaper, magazine, novel, textbook, blog, or tweet, we see a worldview. Every conversation, every interaction, every personal encounter. They each convey a worldview.

Consequently, many threads in the tapestry of our worldviews don’t belong. They’re not true. Our worldviews require truth, and if we haven’t based them on God’s Word, the ultimate truth, then our worldviews rely on false and negative contributions of the world.

Consider this: In the same Barna study I mentioned earlier, 62 percent of Americans polled said they considered themselves “deeply spiritual.” These same people were then asked how this “deep spirituality” affected their decision making. Almost a third, 31 percent, said, “I make my moral choices based on what feels right and comfortable.”

 

We need to get our worldviews from a correct Wordview.


 

Another 18 percent of this group said, “I make moral choices based on whatever is best for me.”

There’s another 14 percent of Americans who said, “I make moral choices based on whatever causes the least conflict with others.”

Only 16 percent reported, “I make my moral choices based on what the Bible says, what God’s Word says.”3 This means most Christians have non-Christian worldviews! You may be a believer and be on your way to heaven yet still not have a Christian worldview because you got it from the world and not from the Word. If we don’t base our decisions on the Bible, then there will be devastating consequences. We need to get our worldviews from a correct Wordview.

The biggest challenge to maintaining this will be that life won’t always make sense. We struggle constantly with thoughts such as, Why isn’t my life working out like I thought it would? It’s not what I intended it to be at all! Why do I feel so stressed all the time? Why is everything in my life such a mess? Why do my problems always overwhelm me? And here’s the short answer: we’re using the wrong operating system. If we accept the world’s worldview, it will mess up our lives here on earth.

Not only will we struggle unnecessarily with problem after problem, but we will also miss out on rewards God has planned for us in heaven. We will get into heaven, but because we lived according to the world’s standards instead of God’s, we will miss out on the heavenly rewards God wants us to enjoy for eternity.

If we want to maintain a worldview centered on Christ and live according to God’s standards, then we must determine our core convictions. Just as a building must have load-bearing beams to support its structure, our worldview relies on beliefs determined by God’s Word. Otherwise, when the culture-quakes of change occur, our worldview will collapse.

Core Convictions

Convictions require you to decide what’s right ahead of time. They’re not based on what feels good or seems right in the moment. They are, instead, the unmovable foundation upon which our lives are built. We don’t need to be mean or judgmental when we share them with others, but we do need to be sure of them. Our beliefs, values, and moral convictions provide a starting point for what we think and feel, the decisions we make, and the actions we take. They shape every aspect of our lives.

We can see how our convictions influence our lives most clearly in our relationships. For instance, my wife, Tammy, and I have been married for more than thirty years, and I’m the only guy who has ever kissed her. You know what that makes me? The best kisser in her world!

Seriously, we decided early in our lives how we wanted our relationships, especially with the opposite sex, to honor God. As a result, when we married we were both virgins and could give ourselves to each other fully, knowing we got to open God’s gift of intimacy together without having to compare, complain, or compete with anyone else. I’ve talked to many people in the church who have struggled with the aftermath of giving their sexual purity away before marriage. But the good news is, it’s possible to become pure again in the eyes of God. If you’ve had that same struggle, know that God wants to restore you and heal you. That process can begin when you come before him, ask for forgiveness, and lift up your hurt.

Another thing Tammy and I agreed to when we got married was to take our vows as seriously as God takes them. We defined “till death do us part” as a lifetime commitment—no matter what. Consequently, we agreed to throw out two words from our dictionary: impossible (because it’s not in God’s vocabulary) and divorce (because it’s not an option).

I won’t presume to tell you exactly what your core convictions should be, since a range of different convictions can all be rooted in the Word of God, but because I’m frequently asked about my own, I would like to explore a few areas of conviction that are crucial to how one engages with the surrounding culture.

       1.  WORSHIP, or placing worth and value on who God is, tops my list. Scripture is crystal clear about God’s preeminence, the way he surpasses all others:

                   The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. (Col. 1:15–18)

                 When we worship God, we embrace his attributes. We see him as omnipresent (everywhere at once), omniscient (all-knowing), omnipotent (all-powerful), totally good, and totally loving. Worship is not about responsive readings or singing hymns. Worship is surrendering yourself to the power, majesty, and goodness of your Creator, letting God be God—even when you don’t understand what he’s doing or when you disagree. “Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship” (Rom. 12:1). When we surrender ourselves to God in all things and acknowledge his headship, we don’t question him, even when the culture does.

       2.  GODS WORD, or placing worth and value on the Bible and believing it is the infallible Word of God, comes next. “All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Tim. 3:16–17). With any situation you face, let God’s Word settle it. Don’t let society explain away what God says is true.

                 We must stay full of the Word of God, using it as the guiding light for our daily lives and the moral basis for our value system. We must be careful to rely solely on truth, avoiding gossip, hearsay, and the opinions of others.

                 When asked what I think about current events or some particular issue, I often respond, “What makes you think my opinion matters? It’s what God thinks that counts.”

       3.  HOLINESS raises the standard of personal purity as we honor the lordship of Christ. God’s character, Christ’s example, and the Holy Spirit’s guidance provide our understanding of personal holiness. It’s being set apart from the world in a way that distinctly reflects who God is and what he’s about. “You know the guidelines we laid out for you from the Master Jesus. God wants you to live a pure life. Keep yourselves from sexual promiscuity. Learn to appreciate and give dignity to your body, not abusing it, as is so common among those who know nothing of God” (1 Thess. 4:2–5 MSG).

                 Holiness requires us to maintain a standard of salt-and-light leadership to those around us. It acknowledges God’s lordship over our lives and demonstrates our willingness to follow in the sacrificial footsteps of Jesus. It means we think through our words, actions, habits, and attitudes at all times. Holiness prevents us from conforming to cultural changes and moral relativism.

       4.  FAMILY carries worth and value as a sacred institution created by God. We are made in his image and designed for relationship. This begins with our families and extends when we marry and start a family of our own. As children, we’re instructed to honor our fathers and our mothers and to obey them; as parents, we are warned not to provoke or harm our children (Eph. 6:2–4). Families take care of one another. “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Tim. 5:8).

                 One relationship that is central to the family is marriage. God considers marriage to be a lifelong sacred covenant between a man and a woman. He hates divorce, because marriage is designed to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. According to Ephesians 5, husbands should love their wives as Christ loves the church, leading through sacrificial service, and wives must love their husbands with respect, honoring them through sacrificial devotion (vv. 22–26). Strong families grow out of strong marriages in which husbands and wives love and respect each other, serve and honor each other.

       5.  LIFE has intrinsic value in all forms, reflecting this most precious gift from God. Therefore, no person has the right to terminate human life, their own or anyone else’s. “The word of the LORD came to me, saying, ‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations’” (Jer. 1:4–5).

                 God knew each person even before he or she was conceived, so we must value each life as a gift from God. In light of this truth, we must face the fact that abortion is murder—there’s no nice way to say it—and taking one’s own life—including euthanasia and doctor-assisted suicide—is not our decision to make. Life is precious, and only God has the right to control when we live and when we die—not human beings.

       6.  HUMILITY reflects an attitude of service, compassion, and strength. It’s the quality of placing the needs of others above your own, refusing to grandstand and draw attention to yourself. Truly humble people always reflect the glory of God, reminding us that he is the source of life. The opposite, of course, is pride—our human tendency to want the praise, adoration, and attention of those around us, to take all the credit and shift all the responsibility. Yet God’s view on human pride is clear: “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble” (James 4:6).

                 Humility serves as the remedy for prideful self-centeredness. It reflects simplicity and sincerity, a willingness to sacrifice one’s ego. My family and I keep our lives and our ministry simple so we can do more for God. Living simply lowers costs and frees up our time so resources can go to the work of the Lord. We reach people for the glory of God, not for our own egos. Sincerity keeps us real and touchable, and it makes sure our words and thoughts match. Humility keeps our hearts tuned to God and not ourselves.

These core areas of conviction probably don’t surprise you, but if you don’t know what you believe about any of them, then I encourage you to explore God’s Word and commit to his truth. Culture will continue to be our Enemy’s smokescreen for obscuring truth and confusing God’s people. But if you keep your eyes on the firm ground of God’s truth, deciding what you believe before you’re tested, then you will stand strong no matter how many bow down to the cultural pressure around you.

Who Says So?

We live in a swiftly changing world, and it can be a difficult task to stay firmly grounded as everything around us shifts. But even as cultural forces attempt to influence and corrupt our biblical worldview, we must remain vigilant and accept only the beliefs and standards that align with our core convictions from the Word of God. This is why I was so upset by that picture of the White House with all the rainbow-colored lights and the Supreme Court ruling it was flaunting. The Bible is very clear about marriage: one man and one woman for life. This is God’s intended original design. He even made the parts of a man’s body and a woman’s body to fit together and to have a purpose in fitting together. This was God’s plan all along.

One question I hear a lot in response to this definition is, “But what about all the polygamy in the Bible? There were guys in the Bible who had multiple wives.” To which I respond, “Not everything the Bible reports the Bible approves.” In other words, not everything reported in the Bible is affirmed in the Bible by God. One example is the issue of slavery. Scripture includes historical accounts of people having slaves, yet it is clearly against slavery, all the way back to the very first books of the Bible. In fact, Jesus quoted Scripture and said he came to abolish and eliminate slavery—to release the oppressed and set people free (Luke 4:18). So just because we read something in the Bible about violence or some sexual deviation, it doesn’t mean the Bible approves it. It’s just accurately reporting the brokenness of humanity.

If you consider that we call it the Holy Bible, it’s actually amazing. Why? Because you won’t find a book that’s got more violence, more incest, rape, molestation, murder, jealousy, and greed.

So why do we call it the Holy Bible then? Because this book tells the truth. If this were a human book, it might not report all the warts and flaws of its heroes. It would just give biographies about the good things they did—their great exploits. But the Bible, when it talks about Abraham and Moses and David, tells us all their weaknesses and demonstrates that they blew it just as much as we do. They made just as many mistakes, and their families were just as messed up as ours are. They had as many problems and addictions as everybody else. The Bible tells the truth.

Here’s what God says about marriage in his Word:

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Matt. 19:4–6)

From the very beginning of creation, marriage has always been one man and one woman joined for life. Who says so? Not me. God says so. While culture attempts to erode our convictions on many issues, this one remains under the rainbow-colored spotlight. It reminds us to return to our roots, our core beliefs, based on God’s truth and not our own preferences. Because if we don’t, we’re in trouble. If we as Christians accept culture’s attempts to reshape our beliefs, then our faith is built on nothing more than subjective impressions and seasonal trends. The result is not faith based on God’s timeless Word but on a temporary, human-created belief system.

If we want to stand strong in a culture that consistently tells us to bow down, then we must know what we’re standing on. As followers of Jesus, we’re standing on eternal truth, the authority of the one and only holy God, and the power of the gospel to change lives. “This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God’s inner sanctuary” (Heb. 6:19 NLT).