CHAPTER 19
THE BLOWUP AT BLURTUP
CLAUDIA
When Parvati fainted, there were a lot of screaming girls in between her and Tyler. So I am honestly not sure if he ever knew Parvati had passed out at the sight of him.
If he did, though, he is the worst person on earth. Because if someone holding a poster saying I was their soul mate passed out at the sight of ME, I would at least autograph the poster for her.
By the time Parvati came to, Tyler was gone. And other than being really mad that she’d missed him, she seemed mostly fine. But the BlurtUp security people still insisted on calling an ambulance.
This is not as dramatic as it sounds, because the ambulance was a golf cart.
ATHENA, pure evil in human form
A golf cart??? That is SO basic! If I’D passed out? With my VIP Platinum ticket? They would have airlifted me to safety in a helicopter.
CLAUDIA
Thanks for your input, Athena.
The golf cart ambulance drove Parvati to the first aid tent, where the BlurtUp medical people Ed. Note: prob not real doctors (might’ve been college kids?)made her lie down for a while and drink orange juice.
PARVATI
They wouldn’t let me leave for half an hour. Which was totally ridiculous! I was fine! I mean, Tyler was already gone from the Meet and Greet. And it wasn’t like Cody and Cody were going to make me faint.
BTW, I hope my dad didn’t get too mad at your dad when he found out about the fainting.
CLAUDIA
Don’t worry about it. My dad’s a lawyer, so he’s used to having people get mad at him.
PARVATI
And I am SO SORRY Ed. Note: NOT sarcasm (Parvati felt v. bad about this) you had to leave the Meet and Greet line before you had a chance to give the thumb drive to Marcel!
CLAUDIA
It’s fine. I’m pretty sure Marcel never even came out of the Meet and Greet tent anyway.
By the time Parvati got the all clear from the doctor/college kid in the medical tent, it was just five minutes before Marcel Mourlot was due on stage. So we ran to the stage area, then wormed our way through the crowd to get as close as we possibly could to the front.
Which, again, was not very close at all.
So when Marcel came on stage, I knew there was no chance I was ever going to get close enough to hand him the thumb drive with the “Windmill” video on it.
PARVATI
You were freaking out because we were so far away from Marcel.
But then I pointed out that even though you were too far away to HAND the thumb drive to him, you were definitely close enough to THROW it to him.
CLAUDIA
This was true.
Probably. I actually wasn’t sure. Because even though the thumb drive was very easy to throw, I am not exactly the world’s greatest thrower.
But it wasn’t like I had a choice. If I didn’t throw it, I had zero chance of ever getting it to Marcel.
And when Marcel said to the crowd, “OKAAAY, NOW I AM GOING TO SING ZEE FUNNY ZEBRA SONG.…” I realized it was now or never. Because once he started the zebra song (whatever that was), I’d never get his attention.
So I screamed “MARCEL, CATCH THIS!” as loud as I could.
Then I threw the thumb drive at the stage.
Like I said, I’m not a great thrower. So I didn’t even think I’d get it close to Marcel.
And I absolutely, positively DID NOT MEAN TO HIT HIM IN THE EYE.
If I’d had ANY idea that might happen, I NEVER would’ve used a thumb drive with pointy Batman ears.
PARVATI
OMG, it was terrifying. Marcel, like, fell to his knees and started holding his eye and screaming in French.
And right away, all his fans started looking around like, “WHO DID THAT? AND HOW CAN WE KILL THEM?”
CLAUDIA
Parvati said, “We need to get out of here STAT.”
I agreed. So we grabbed my dad and ran for the subway.
I was so scared we were going to get chased down by angry Marcel fans that my heart didn’t stop pounding until we were on the 7 train heading back into Manhattan.
Which was when Mom texted Dad that Reese was in serious trouble.