14.In 2015 Jackie Cohen wrote a script for what he intended to be his masterpiece.
The film, Auschwitz Antebellum, was, supposedly, a magical realist romantic comedy about a Jewish prisoner in a Nazi concentration camp and an enslaved Black woman on a plantation in the antebellum South magically switching places, then, after switching places, learning the similarities of their two situations, then after learning these similarities magically finding themselves together, first in the concentration camp, and then the plantation. In the process of trying to help each other, despite their clashing personalities, they fall in love. Their love rescues them from their oppression. They then marry and go on to form the most successful jazz label of all time.
Yes, this film was actually made. Jackie Cohen directed his own script and played the male lead of the Jewish prisoner, while the legendary star Alicia Davis played the female lead of the enslaved woman. The film was completed but was immediately shelved. Jackie was never able to get a film financed ever again, and barely anyone returned his calls for a year and a half. Since the making of Auschwitz Antebellum, no one has seen the film or read the script. Only a select, resourceful few have been able to get their hands on a pirated copy.
Below is the first and only incredibly brief oral history on the making of this so-called film.
JACKIE COHEN (Director, Writer, Star): I don’t care what anyone says, I’ve never been prouder of anything I’ve ever made in my life. This film was going to bring Jews and Blacks together like nothing ever had since all the Jews were EP’ing all the fucking jazz records and all those Jews were writing for Redd Foxx and Jimmie Walker. This was gonna show how much we are all the same and how we can serve each other in our hearts and our pocketbooks. I was replacing a frown with a smile. I was replacing tears with happy tears. It’s a brilliant film. But the suits got scared. Really everyone got scared, because that’s what everyone does. No one ever wants anything that’s actually going to fucking do something. You gotta fight for that, and in this case I lost the fight, and, yes, it was devastating.
ALICIA DAVIS (Actress): I don’t really want to talk about that movie. It’s one of the great regrets of my life.
JACKIE COHEN: Alicia felt uncomfortable around the material. Embarrassingly, I think part of the problem was that she wasn’t attracted to me. I had lost a ton of weight for the role (obviously I’m in a concentration camp). And then I’ve seen who she’s dated and been with—they’re usually meatier guys. When we met to do the movie before I got on my crazy diet I definitely felt that there were sparks, because I was my usual meaty self. But no doing on set. I lost my meat, and we lost our spark. That made things hard, but luckily my desire for her was enough for the both of us to sell the acting. I don’t know why she won’t talk about the film. You agreed to do it, didn’t you? The script didn’t really change after I gave it to her. Okay, sure, maybe I added like three more sex scenes. But they had to be in there. We needed to give it a little more levity, and you can only put in so many jokes in a movie about slavery and the Holocaust. So next to laughter, what makes people feel the best? Sex! And again, she agreed to everything. Basically what I think happened with Alicia is that everyone started getting fucking chickenshit, and she followed the pack. Just like a fucking actress. Not an original thought in her goddamn head.
STUART SILVERMAN (Producer): I’m not quite sure what any of us were thinking. But whatever it was, it wasn’t clear. That’s really all I’ll say.
JACKIE COHEN: The fact that anyone at all could say that they were a producer on this is unbelievable. Sure, there were useless assholes around that had the title of “producer.” But I produced this alone. These assholes just hid in the shadows the whole time to see what was going to happen. To see what “other” people thought before they decided to give a fuck about helping me make the movie in the right way. This was the ultimate film about anti-Semitism and racism and not being able to see the deep similarities between the Holocaust and slavery. Why would you not do everything you possibly could to make sure something this important be made in the right way and be seen by everyone? Why? ’Cause money is the only thing you think about. But the irony is this would have made money. This was Schindler’s List meets The Color Purple. With a whole lotta humor and a bunch of hot sex. What person wouldn’t rush to see that? Who wouldn’t want to see some positive imagery in their brains to associate with those traumatic periods of history? Humor and sex are power, and I was handing power back to the victims. Showing the oppressors of then, and especially of now, that they no longer had us in their grips. Because what are the two biggest weapons against oppression? Funny and fucking. The fact that no one could see that fact is the biggest tragedy of all. Almost as big of a tragedy as slavery or the Holocaust. I mean maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but I ask you this: How do we change the narrative if we don’t change the narrative?
TOM WOLFMAN (Studio Head): I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve never heard of that movie. Please leave me alone.
JACKIE COHEN: One of the things I’m proudest of with this picture is the humor. No one had ever really done that before. Okay, yeah, Roberto Benigni with Life Is Beautiful, but his character was so corny and “sweet.” So weak. My character was tough as shit. He was a fucking badass and he was a FUNNY fucking badass. He’d make fun of the Nazi guards and then kick their asses. And then he meets this woman from a completely different world and he sweeps her off her feet, even though he’s skinny as fuck and stinks like shit, but he’s still able to get this super-hot woman. ’Cause even though she’s a slave, she still has great taste in men. That was one of the important things in the script. It was just as important to show that in addition to being super oppressed these two characters were also super hot and even more importantly: super hot for each other. And she was a real quick wit, too. She wasn’t an idiot. You don’t need a formal education to be smart. I mean, I never paid attention to one single thing in school, and my IQ is through the roof. I wanted to show all oppressed people that even if you were oppressed you could still be super fucking smart and super fucking hot. I mean, these people are weak. Physically, I mean. They’ve been starved and beaten, but they can still match wits with the best of ’em, and fuck like gods. And that’s really what gets them through. Other than the true love that they have for each other, of course.
JERRY YURMAN (Executive Producer): That was a dark time for me. I was in a complete blackout state, so I can’t really comment on anything I or anyone else did or allowed, because I just don’t remember.
JACKIE COHEN: I had to pick up the slack for everyone on the movie because there was a lot of pills going on. Mostly Xanax. It was a fucking CVS on set. And every time I confronted any of these amateurs, they claimed they were being prescribed it due to panic attacks caused by the movie and by working with me, because I was supposedly “off my rocker” and “very abusive.” Fucking junkies. They’ll make up anything to justify their using. They also love to band together to make up one story to give the rationalization even more validity. Fuckin’ drugs, man. Believe me, I’ve been there. But NEVER when I was working. And that’s something they all still need to apologize to ME for, rather than demanding that I apologize to THEM for “creating a toxic environment” that triggered their “addictions.” Pathetic. Take some accountability, for Christ’s sake. Stop lookin’ for fall guys for your fuckups. Isn’t that the first thing they teach you in AA or NA or whatever the fuck? I remember they’d all just be staring at me. Zonked out of their gourds. I’d look in their eyes and it was like I was looking at a bunch of fucking zombies. They could have come to me for help. We could have all been there for each other. But instead they just went through the looking glass, and didn’t look back until the film was finished and they realized all of these fingers were being pointed. Cowards through and through.
LESLIE ACKERMAN (Co-Producer): Not sure what you’re talking about. I think you have the wrong person.
JACKIE COHEN: I thought this was really going to be my most major achievement. I’m not just talking awards. I’m talking about much more than that. I’ve always been loved. But this movie was going to make me a cultural hero. And I was ready to take that role on. More than ready. I know this might sound arrogant, maybe even delusional, but the world needed me in that role. ’Cause I was gonna come at it with no frills. Most so-called activists make you feel guilty. Guilty that you’re not like them. Not me. I was going to make everyone excited to be a better person. I was going to make people be better people without them even realizing that that’s what they were doing. But what I’m realizing now is that everyone else had to be ready to take on that role, too. But no one was. Instead of standing, they all sat down and covered their eyes and ears. Ostrich people.
EMMA SWANSON (Cinematographer): This was my last job. I quit the business after this. I realized that nothing could ever be good again. That I would never get the things I had seen out of my head. It’s strange. As we were filming all of these scenes at a death camp and a plantation, I almost felt as if I was a Nazi or an overseer. I felt like the deepest form of subhuman. And I truly didn’t see what any of this was for. I hit a wall. Why make anything? Why do anything that isn’t directly helping people, and if you don’t have the capacity for that, which I don’t, better to just do nothing. I guess you could call me a recluse now. I go months without talking or seeing anyone, but I think that’s a good thing. Better that than infecting anyone with the sickness that is in me. And there is a sickness or I would have never agreed to do that movie, or shoot any of the things that I was paid to shoot. I’m so grateful it was shelved, so I was able to make this decision to drop out more of my own volition rather than be forced to live this way, which would definitely have happened if the movie was released. I can’t wait till I die. And when I do, I hope I’m alone and no one cares.
JACKIE COHEN: One of my greatest gifts is always being able to see when I’m clearly right and when I’m clearly wrong. And when the movie got shelved and all these fucks tried to sue me for emotional distress I really took some time to reflect on the whole thing and what I could have done differently. I’m being totally honest when I say this without any denial whatsoever: I did nothing wrong. I made a special movie from a special place in my heart and I stand by that more than I’ve ever stood by anything.