Perhaps we should start this chapter with a disclaimer. We both recognize that people of many different worldviews will read our book. At least we hope so! Some of you are people of faith, others not. We approached our assignment in writing this book with the commitment that we would offer our thoughts to a wide-ranging audience. If you are a follower of Christ, you will especially appreciate some of our spiritual references and biblical observations. But if you’re not a follower of our faith, we do respect you and know that you can get a lot out of our teaching anyway. In this chapter we will explore what we believe is God’s view of old age. If that doesn’t particularly interest you, feel free to move on to the next chapter. We won’t be offended. Or, better yet, read on—you just might be surprised at the value of this chapter.
Our message in this chapter is this: God doesn’t give up on us when we get old. In fact, the opposite is true, as we see the honor given to elders in the Bible. Let’s consider God’s view of us in this later-life stage of the 60–80 Window. We have already talked about the danger of making our positions and careers define us. In God’s view, who we are is more important than what we do. More than ever, at this later time in our lives, followers of Jesus need to center on their identity in Christ, not their job, position, role, or authority.
I, Hans, and my wife, Donna, have four wonderful children. We feel so blessed to watch them grow as adults. They’re getting married and producing lots of their own children as the next generation emerges. By the way, we think that grandchildren are a gift from God that softens the blow of old age. We have three sons and one daughter. Our daughter, Cambria, decided to get tattoos not long after she went away to college. We weren’t supportive of the idea, but ultimately we did not stand in her way and forbid it. For some of you reading this, you probably would have seen it differently and you would have forbidden her. Her first tattoo reads, “Psalm 139.” She chose that as a proclamation and a personal reminder of God’s great love for her and how He made her. The essence of Psalm 139 is that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. This passage has always been a deep encouragement to me when I get down on myself. The Bible teaches in this psalm that we are each a stunning trophy of God’s creation—inside and out. That promise goes for every one of us. Yes, Cambria went on to get some other tattoos. All of them are beautiful and have deep meaning. For her generation, tattoos are a way to communicate their values on their bodies. She tells me that, “We don’t only use them just to communicate to others what we care about but also as a way of remembering where we came from and what we love.”
There is no greater passage of Scripture to lock in our identity before God than Psalm 139 and, in keeping with her tattoo, Cambria has memorized it. Today she is newly married with a vibrant faith and ministry alongside her husband, Max. Her passion is to serve her Lord Jesus, and Donna and I are so proud of the woman she has grown to be. A faithful, gifted, and artistic servant of Jesus, Cambria is living in Cape Town, South Africa, where she and Max reach out to the poorest of the poor on this planet in the name of Jesus.
God never changes his view of us from day to day, but our employers do . . . our co-workers do . . . our family does. In fact, many of us may struggle with our own view of ourselves from day to day. It is a great anchor for our persona to know that God is pleased with who we are from our birth to our death, in every stage of our life. In Psalm 139:13–14 we read, “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” Does that reality diminish as we grow older? No, we are wonderfully made for the elder season of our lives just as much as when we were thriving teenagers. If God were in charge of billboards, magazine covers, and advertising, we would see a lot more older faces!
Let’s explore some of the great comments in the Bible about getting older—we will start with a couple of my favorites since I, Hans, started growing gray even before my forties.
Gray hair is a crown of splendor;
it is attained in the way of righteousness. (Prov. 16:31)
The glory of young men is their strength,
gray hair the splendor of the old. (20:29)
Insight: the energy of any society is with the youth. But the crowning achievement in life is to actually grow old with dignity and have that place of elder honor.
Is not wisdom found among the aged?
Does not long life bring understanding? (Job 12:12)
Insight: here is what God says is the role elders play in our world. They are the ones who have the wisdom and understanding the younger generations need. Wouldn’t it be refreshing if our culture actually sought out and listened to its elders?
Do not cast me away when I am old;
do not forsake me when my strength is gone. (Ps. 71:9)
Insight: the writer of this psalm expresses what we all fear, that we will be abandoned and alone in our senior years. He is pleading with God not to forget him when his strength is gone and he is no longer useful in society. It seems clear from the full body of what we know about God in the Bible that he is not going to forget us at that stage of our lives.
Since my youth, God, you have taught me,
and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.
Even when I am old and gray,
do not forsake me, my God,
till I declare your power to the next generation,
your mighty acts to all who are to come. (vv. 17–18)
Insight: here we have the same fear expressed as earlier in the same psalm. The repetition of ideas in the poetry of the psalms is a common literary technique. There is repetition and then the building of a new idea. The writer adds here the role he wants to play in his old age: that of communicator of God’s mighty power. Those of us who have walked with God for many decades can tell the young people about all God has done for us. We have seen the faithfulness of God displayed time and again! This really is what our book is all about: giving back from a life fully blessed.
Stand up in the presence of the aged, show respect for the elderly and revere your God. I am the LORD. (Lev. 19:32)
Insight: we love this one! Right out of the mouth of God in his instructions to Moses: stand up with respect when older people enter your space. Wow, would that be interesting! Here is that critical word respect—the younger are to give the older a place of reverence and respect. Unfortunately, for many of us as we grow older, we feel that our society pushes us to the sidelines and we “can’t get no respect.” It is always refreshing to run into young people who do respect their elders and make that plainly known to us.
He died at a good old age, having enjoyed long life, wealth and honor. His son Solomon succeeded him as king. (1 Chron. 29:28)
Insight: this was the death of David, who lived to be an old man and died with great dignity.
And so Job died, an old man and full of years. (Job 42:17)
Insight: both of these previous two passages, referring to David and Job, remind us of the wisdom of Abraham Lincoln, who said, “And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”1 These great men had a lot of life in their years and died full of dignity.
Moses was a hundred and twenty years old when he died, yet his eyes were not weak nor his strength gone. The Israelites grieved for Moses in the plains of Moab thirty days, until the time of weeping and mourning was over. (Deut. 34:7–8)
Insight: Moses lived well and finished well. When his career was over, he was still physically and mentally sharp, as we can read in these verses. He died full of dignity with his honor in place. God must have been so pleased with that life full of obedience and a faith that never wavered.
Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. (Titus 2:2–3)
Insight: Harriet Beecher Stowe said, “So much has been said and sung of beautiful young girls, why doesn’t somebody wake up to the beauty of old women?”2 That pretty well sums up what we, the authors, think of older women. They have a great place in our society and our churches to teach right living to those who are coming up behind them. You met two such wonderful older ladies in part 3 of our book, Dorothy and Julie.
And finally, we finish this chapter with our favorite passage showing what God thinks of us as we age into our elderlescence years.
Even to your old age and gray hairs
I am he, I am he who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
I will sustain you and I will rescue you. (Isa. 46:4, emphasis added)
Insight: here is a promise from God you can cling to until your life is over. This verse from Isaiah is well worth memorizing if you are over sixty. When we are old and our hair is gray, God will do three things for us: sustain us, carry us, and rescue us if we need it.
What can we conclude about God’s view of old age? It seems pretty countercultural to our Western view. Our Western culture honors youth; the Bible honors old age. We fixate on the young and tend to want to put the old people out to pasture. The Bible says the older generations need to be around and we need to listen to them. We in our society want to relegate the growing population of older Americans to senior centers, retirement homes, and 55+ communities. Not surprising, here is another place where culture and the Bible clash.
Our biggest issue with how our society treats the older generations is this idea of segregation. We would argue that the best solution is to keep the generations together as long as possible. It makes for the best communities, the best companies, and the best churches. That community, organization, cause, company, or church that consists only of people under forty definitely lacks the dimension the Bible teaches is critically important: the intermingling of all generations.
Who does the Bible say I am, as I am getting older? The key word from Scripture is the word respect. There is a place for great respect for old age in the Bible. Old age is to be honored and revered. And the wisdom and knowledge of older people are to be sought out and gleaned by the younger generations.