Contents
TITLE PAGE
COPYRIGHT NOTICE
DEDICATION
Chapter One
EFF YOU, EFFIE!
Chapter Two
THE DARKEST OF MAGIC
Chapter Three
FROM ROACHES TO RICHES, BITCHES!
Chapter Four
LOUIS AND GUCCI AND PUCCI, OH MY!
Chapter Five
WHAT’S UP DOC?
Chapter Six
YOU DO? I DON’T
Chapter Seven
KNOCK KNOCK
Chapter Eight
I THINK I MIGHT BE LAZY
Chapter Nine
FOOD, WATER, OXYGEN, TELEVISION
Chapter Ten
‘TIS BETTER TO GIVE THAN TO RECEIVE … ANOTHER FKN CANDLE
Chapter Eleven
GINUWINE ISN’T REALLY MY COUSIN
Chapter Twelve
MEMBERSHIP HAS ITS PRIVILEGES
Chapter Thirteen
I WOULD PUCK WITCHU
Chapter Fourteen
IT’S AN UNFORETTABLE LIFE
Chapter Fifteen
STRETCH MARKS FO LIFE!
Chapter Sixteen
THAT YEAR I WENT LIN-SANE
Epilogue
WHICH CAME FIRST? THE CHICKEN, OBVI
PHOTOGRAPHS
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
NOTES
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
COPYRIGHT