HOW THIS BOOK WAS WRITTEN—AND WHY
“The starting point is a question.”
— ALBERTO MANGUEL
Did you ever notice how the best ideas come to you in the shower?
It happens all the time. You’re minding your own business, holding the shampoo bottle, when suddenly it hits you.
The idea that would change everything.
The solution to the problem you’ve been facing.
The answer to the question you’ve been asking.
And it was right in front of you all along. . . .
April 24, 1997. A crisp spring morning in New England. I’m living in a dorm room at the small liberal arts college where I’m majoring in religious studies. The dorm room itself is so big that when I stand in the middle of the room, I can touch the walls on either side.
At this point in my life, I’m 30 years old, divorced, and have less than $800 to my name. I also have no idea what I’m going to do with the rest of my life.
On the night before The Shower That Changed Everything, I’m sitting in my tiny room, staring at the concrete walls, when three thoughts occur to me. The first thought is that something is very wrong with my life; that much is obvious. The second thought, which bothers me even more than the first, is that I have no idea how to fix my life; that one definitely bugs me. And the third thought, which annoys me even more than the first two, is that if anyone should be successful, it should be me; and since I’m anything but successful, I feel like a total failure.
That night, I realize that something is very wrong with my life.
Let me explain.
I grew up in a poor family in a rich neighborhood. Although we lived in one of the wealthiest communities in New England, my family was dirt poor. I mean that literally: we lived at the bottom of a dirt road in an unfinished house. One day when I was about nine years old, I asked my mother, “Mom, how come you and Dad are always fighting about money? And how come we always have to eat macaroni and cheese?”
My mother replied that they constantly fought about money because there was not enough coming in, and she was afraid they wouldn’t be able to pay the bills and keep food on the table. When she said that, I was very confused, because I saw both my father and mother working all the time. Weeks would go by and we’d hardly see my father, because he’d be working 70 to 80 hours a week or more. And my mother worked part-time jobs, too. So I asked her the next logical question:
“Why isn’t there enough money coming in?”
I don’t think my mother really knew how to answer that question, so she took out the family checkbook and showed me how much money was coming in and going out every month. Sure enough, there was more month left at the end of the money.
At that moment, I made two decisions that would profoundly affect the rest of my life. First, I decided that I wouldn’t need anything from my parents and that I’d become self-sufficient as quickly as possible. Now, I’m sure that was not my mother’s intention; nevertheless, at that moment I decided to not ask my parents for things, because I didn’t want to be a burden to them.
The second decision I made was that I would make something of my life, even though I had no idea what that meant, let alone how to do it. But I decided that I didn’t want to live a life of lack and fear and poverty. That was all I knew, all I had ever known; but I decided then and there that it wasn’t the life I wanted.
You’ve heard of the book Rich Dad, Poor Dad? Well, I only had a poor dad. My father, even though he worked hard all his life, couldn’t teach me how to be successful. Since I didn’t know who else to ask, I decided to use the library. I began devouring the classics of self-help literature: Dale Carnegie, Napoleon Hill, Wayne Dyer, Stephen Covey, and more. I spent most of my childhood in the library, because books were a way for me to escape from that life of poverty, lack, and fear.
I also made sure to work hard and apply myself in school, because I naturally assumed that the best way to succeed in life was to get good grades (since that’s what everyone told us). I got straight A’s, skipped eighth grade, graduated at the top of my class, and got full scholarships to college. By the time I graduated from high school, my parents, teachers, and friends were telling me that I was going to be a big success.
Yet, there I sat in my pocket-sized dorm room all those years later, with nothing to show for all my hard work but a series of missed opportunities, failed relationships, and less than $800 in the bank.
For as long as I could remember, I’d had this inescapable, gnawing feeling that there was something missing—some vital piece of information I’d overlooked, some secret key that would unlock the vault to success. But the harder I looked, the more the answer seemed to elude me.
That was the day The Shower happened.
The night before The Shower That Changed Everything, something else happens that’s important to our story. As I’m sitting in my miniature dorm room thinking about how my life pretty much sucks, I look around the room and see something. In fact, I see lots and lots of somethings.
I realize that the walls of my dorm room are covered with pieces of yellow legal paper on which I’d written dozens of positive statements, such as: I am happy, I am wealthy, and I am good enough.
Why had I posted all these positive statements all over my dorm room? Because that’s what all those self-help books I’d been reading for so many years had said to do!
That night, I finally admit something that I’d never wanted to admit before—that even though I’d spent most of my life trying to convince myself of the truth of these positive statements, I never really believed them. As much as I wanted to believe that I was happy, wealthy, and good enough, I didn’t believe any of those things. In fact, the harder I tried to believe those positive things about my life, the more the cold, hard facts stared back at me and seemed to say, “Yeah, right!”
I turn out the light and go to bed feeling depressed, defeated, and discouraged.
The next day, I get up and get in the shower, just like any other morning. Except on this particular morning, my mind is still racing from the night before. Questions start bouncing around my brain—questions that are simple, yet profound. If you could have heard what was going on in my head at that exact moment, it would have sounded like this:
If I’ve been saying these positive statements to myself for so many years, how come I still don’t believe them?
And if I don’t believe these positive statements after repeating them over and over again for so long, what’s it going to take for me to finally believe something good about myself?
There’s got to be an easier way to change my life. But what is it?
That’s when it hit me. (No, not the soap.)
I realize that what I’m doing at that very moment is asking and searching for answers to questions. In that instant, I realize that human thought itself is the process of asking and searching for answers to questions.
Suddenly, a question forms in my mind—a simple question that changes everything:
If human thought is the process of asking
and searching for answers to questions,
why are we going around making
statements that we don’t believe?
In a flash of insight, I finally understand why I never believed all those positive statements I’d been repeating over and over all those years. It all came down to one simple thing. Of course! It was so obvious now that I saw it. I immediately recognize that it doesn’t matter how long or how often I repeat these positive statements to myself; if I don’t fix this one single thing, all of my hard work will be for naught.
At that moment, I knew that if we start to ask ourselves the right questions, it would change everything.
Then something else occurs to me. I realize there are millions of people just like me—people who are trying really hard to change their lives, people who are “following the rules” just like we were told, but who still haven’t manifested the abundant lifestyle they really want—because they didn’t believe the positive statements they’d been saying to themselves, either.
At that moment, I had the realization that if we were to start to ask ourselves the right questions and stop asking the wrong questions, it would literally change everything. And for the first time, I know in the depths of my soul what I’m here on Earth to do.
That’s why, on the morning of April 24, 1997, I got out of the shower . . . and realized that everything was about to change.
After my epiphany in The Shower That Changed Everything, I immediately sat down at my computer and typed out a question that consisted of four simple words. As I stared at the words glowing on my computer screen, I had another thought: If I accept the truth of this question—and start acting as if it were true—then my life would have to change.
Then I wrote another question, as simple as the first one. Then another. Then another. The questions kept coming. I kept writing. For the first time in my life, everything finally made sense.
After I’d typed several pages of questions, I stopped and stared at my monitor again. The words I’d just written were different from every positive statement I’d ever read or heard or written or spoken in my entire life. I knew this, because in all my years of research and study, I’d never seen anyone articulate thoughts in this way.
Then I had another thought: What am I supposed to do now?
This is so cool! I thought. I can’t believe no one’s ever thought of this before! Then I had another thought, one that stopped me in my tracks: What am I supposed to do now?
But I didn’t yet have an answer to that question. That’s why, after The Shower That Changed Everything, even though I knew my life was about to change, I still didn’t know how to change it. I went about the business of being a broke 30-year-old religious studies major—and tucked my discovery away, until I could figure out what to do with it.
Six months later, on October 20, 1997, I had the second epiphany that changed my life, when I realized the existence of a condition I named success anorexia, which causes people to hold themselves back from the level of success they’re capable of. That discovery led to the publication of my first book, Permission to Succeed®, and eventually my other books, seminars, workshops, and mastermind programs, where I teach people how to live a more abundant lifestyle and stop driving down the road of life with one foot on the brake.
And in all of my seminars, keynote speeches, products, and programs, I kept teaching people about my discovery that happened in The Shower That Changed Everything—and the simple four-step method I invented to change your questions, change your results, and change your life. (I’ll teach you these four steps in Part II of this book.)
As the years went on, and as I kept sharing my method through books, TV interviews, live workshops, and online events, something wonderful began to happen: people around the world started sending me cards, letters, and e-mails; sharing their stories on social media; and telling me in our seminars and mastermind groups about the amazing results they were getting by using my simple method—results like:
Then those people began to tell their friends, and those friends told their friends . . . and so on and so on . . . and that’s how The Afformations Revolution began.
And it all started with a simple question that I asked in the shower.
This book was written for you, if you . . .
This book holds the answers to questions you’ve had for years—and provides answers to the ones you didn’t even know you had.
Enjoy it from beginning to end. Share the method with your friends, family members, and co-workers.
And prepare to be amazed as the miracle of your new, abundant lifestyle unfolds before you.
I believe in you!
Noah St. John
Inventor of Afformations®
Founder of SuccessClinic.com
